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How Can I Convince Him That Am Not Ready? - Family - Nairaland

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How Can I Convince Him That Am Not Ready? by ng4am(f): 11:51pm On Sep 04, 2011
i just had a baby 3 months ago, and my hubby is thinking of having another baby, reason that am serving now and i don't have much doing i should try and finish child bearing now and concentrate on my career later. honestly am not ready now cos the pains of labor and episotomy is still fresh in my memory. pls your contribution will be appreciated.

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Re: How Can I Convince Him That Am Not Ready? by Nobody: 2:36am On Sep 05, 2011
here are a few questions to you:
- cant you sit down and simply open your heart to this man just as you did on this thread?!
- what were your plans before all this?!
- how understanding your partner is about the trauma you just went through?
- how understanding your partner is about letting you finish your career?
Re: How Can I Convince Him That Am Not Ready? by Nobody: 4:10am On Sep 05, 2011
ng4am:

i just had a baby 3 months ago, and my hubby is thinking of having another baby, reason that am serving now and i don't have much doing i should try and finish child bearing now and concentrate on my career later. honestly am not ready now cos the pains of labor and episotomy is still fresh in my memory. pls your contribution will be appreciated.
.

Start off by telling him exactly what you've just posted here. This is not a big deal, really.

But na waooooooo , just 3 months ago and he wants another one? o'ga ooooo
Re: How Can I Convince Him That Am Not Ready? by Sissy3(f): 4:24am On Sep 05, 2011
odikwa egwu. only 3months?

pains of labor and episotomy is still fresh in my memory.


those are more than reason enough, but the question is would he be considerate of those feelings
Re: How Can I Convince Him That Am Not Ready? by ronkebp(f): 3:40pm On Sep 07, 2011
if he really cares about your well being, he will never!! ever!!, ask you to take in again, three months after having your baby, he must be a wicked man, (sorry to judge), i do not know why am taking it personal, does he think that you will just go into labor and gabm!!!! the baby is out. if you like don't open your mouth and tell him exactly how you feel!!
Re: How Can I Convince Him That Am Not Ready? by N101: 5:08pm On Sep 07, 2011
I think he's so happy about the first one he's planning waaaay ahead of himself.

As Jenny said, sit him down in his excitement, and tell him exactly what you've said in this thread.
Re: How Can I Convince Him That Am Not Ready? by obowunmi(m): 1:34am On Sep 08, 2011
Isn't there suppose to be a 6 month wait before the next one ? O gaa! Tell him not to rip ya pu.ss.y.
Re: How Can I Convince Him That Am Not Ready? by nassiwa: 9:50am On Sep 08, 2011
Talk to your husband and let him know that you are not ready. You still need some time to heal of the child labor pains and also time to raise your baby. He should wait until you are ready and prepared.
Re: How Can I Convince Him That Am Not Ready? by nsodo: 11:23am On Sep 08, 2011
You case needs a third party because it seems you may not convince him. Try to look for a counselor to talk to your husband and if he truly loves and does not what to make you a baby manufacturing machine he will listen to you and change.
Re: How Can I Convince Him That Am Not Ready? by Bawss1(m): 1:04pm On Sep 08, 2011
Apparently somebody thinks he has married mother-hen. cheesy
Re: How Can I Convince Him That Am Not Ready? by iaabc(f): 1:35pm On Sep 08, 2011
IF he does not listen, simply go to your doctor together.
Re: How Can I Convince Him That Am Not Ready? by blank(f): 3:46pm On Sep 08, 2011
Pls no one should crucify me, i just want to state my own view. Why is it wrong to want to take in 3 months after a child? It is not like the baby will be born immediately. You will have 9 months to get over the pain of labour. I am trying to take in again actually since my baby was 4 months but no luck yet. Do it now during your NYSC as when u start working, ur office might tell you to wait a yr or till you are confirmed before you can apply for maternity leave and most companies do not employ pregnant women.
Re: How Can I Convince Him That Am Not Ready? by maclatunji: 11:48am On Sep 09, 2011
Obviously, your husband is ignorant about a woman's reproductive health (in addition to the health of your newborn baby). Tell him that he wants to kill you and you are not ready to die yet. Go to Google for evidence of what I am saying.
Re: How Can I Convince Him That Am Not Ready? by Nobody: 3:32pm On Sep 09, 2011
@ Blank

The problem is that we don't get our priorities right. Having a child for convinience and for a future job is just plain irresponsible. First things first and if you ask me, her health comes fires. If you've being through childbirth then you will know its not something one does out of pressure. The labour room is not d only difficult thing about pregnancy. The whole nine months is a tug of war for some women. Three months after that is just plain inconsiderate. My elder sister tried it and almost died. Fact!


Abeg poster take your time jare. Life is too short to live for someone else.
Re: How Can I Convince Him That Am Not Ready? by Nobody: 3:46pm On Sep 09, 2011
//
Re: How Can I Convince Him That Am Not Ready? by dayokanu(m): 5:34pm On Sep 09, 2011
Probably the kongo dey sweet am wella
Re: How Can I Convince Him That Am Not Ready? by oln: 8:52pm On Sep 09, 2011
What's the sex of ur baby?this may also be the reason for his wanting another child immediately,so he could try for a different sex.
Re: How Can I Convince Him That Am Not Ready? by Tgirl4real(f): 12:12am On Sep 10, 2011
Mr dear, if he is the type that will not listen, u better tell him to at least allow you see the doctor first. The doctor will certainly discourage him
Re: How Can I Convince Him That Am Not Ready? by Nobody: 4:30am On Sep 10, 2011
Having a child isn't something only one party thinks of doing. It's a decision you're supposed to make together.
Re: How Can I Convince Him That Am Not Ready? by Sissy3(f): 5:35am On Sep 10, 2011
blank:

Pls no one should crucify me, i just want to state my own view. Why is it wrong to want to take in 3 months after a child? It is not like the baby will be born immediately. You will have 9 months to get over the pain of labour. I am trying to take in again actually since my baby was 4 months but no luck yet. Do it now during your NYSC as when u start working, your office might tell you to wait a yr or till you are confirmed before you can apply for maternity leave and most companies do not employ pregnant women.

she is still traumatized by the first one, that's why.
Re: How Can I Convince Him That Am Not Ready? by Nobody: 6:01am On Sep 10, 2011
I have to agree with Uju.
Re: How Can I Convince Him That Am Not Ready? by Youngpo413: 4:31pm On Nov 01, 2014
I go soon marry o,chei see enjoyment!
Re: How Can I Convince Him That Am Not Ready? by Nobody: 8:23pm On Nov 01, 2014
My dear, this is your body, your life not his. Make him know how you feel about it. 3 months is just too early. Let him know what 'child-spacing' means.

**in Yoruba** Aara lo ma nfabo si... You ll be the one to go through pains of labor.
Re: How Can I Convince Him That Am Not Ready? by twosquare(m): 11:54pm On Nov 01, 2014
temigracie:
My dear, this is your body, your life not his. Make him know how you feel about it. 3 months is just too early. Let him know what 'child-spacing' means.

**in Yoruba** Aara lo ma nfabo si... You ll be the one to go through pains of labor.
temilade, check date now.... U don get Jesus power ooo...resurrectind dead thread. grin you and Youngpo413.

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