I met my boyfriend a few month ago.
He is Nigirian and i am German. We just moved in together to get to know each other better and i found out that its kind of difficult with our different understandigs about relationship, being close to each other, raising children, family issues.

Any advice from ur side how i can make this relationship work better? What are the expectations of Nigirian men in their woman? Whats important for them? What is a Nigirian family about?

Though I am in a "mixed marriage" I wouldn't know how to advise you. We've been together for years, we've shared a lot, have kid together, and I sometimes still look at him and realize how different our cultures are. We just never stop learning new things!

The thing is, you should be open-minded about his culture, talk with him about it, hang out here on nairaland, try and travel to nigeria if you can, talk with his friends etc. but at the same time, you shoudn't let it blind you. There are some things that are related to the culture and others that are to his personnality, so you shouldn't think only about learning the culture and forgetting to get to know the man behind it.

At the beginning of our relationship we both had to take our cultures with a pinch of salt. We talked a lot about every single issue, and we accepted to make some compromises. Be careful though, don't accept something that you won't be able to handle in the long run. Same goes to him.

I don't know how it worked, and still works, for us, I guess we just accepted to create a new culture of our own and we also had a lot in common despite the different backgrounds.

good luck to you!

Thanks for ur opinion and advice.

Its kind of tough, he is Nigirian living in the US. I m German and "moved" to the US to get to know him better. We met on one of my journey to the US and started with a long-distance relationship but it was kind of hard to get to know each other with this. So i m here now and trying to figure out whats him, whats the culture and how i feel in all these different things. I mean its not only to learn and see the Nigiria culture - its also to learn and see the american one and to compromise and fit into all those different things.

I do think and feel i m open minded enough to handle all this but sometimes it comes all back to me and i feel like, i just wanna run back home to my old secure place.

I felt by asking those questions it might be more easy to see whats the culture background and whats his personality. I have a friend in a mixed relationship (american - fidji) and she is describing the same. Be open minded, show interest and if an issue comes up try to talk about. And takes things more easy than in a non-mixed culture relationship.

Thank you for ur answere. I was hoping for some more advice or interest to share things but maybe ppl dont really know what to answere or advice

I feel you, I've also met my husband in a third country (neither his or mine), but I guess it's been easier that way, because none of our cultures was imposed on the other one (if we had lived in nigeria he'd probably have found it more difficult to compromise, and the same goes with me if we had met in my own environment).

Anyway, being abroad is not easy, especially at the beginning when you still miss your family and friends. It takes time to know someone enough to commit to that person, so take your time, take it easy and remember that things that seem evident to you might not seem so to him (and the other way around).

Mixed cultural relationships are very sensitive and deserve attention, effective communication and patience.

I would say you took a very bold step by moving to the states to meet him, i would say that is very courageous, cos you would be needing more of that courage to take you through.

Being a part of each others culture is the best way to cope, learn, appreciate and be open minded about everything with regards to his culture, avoid making strong co relations about his character to his culture, some Nigerian men perceive that as offensive, ensure that the excitement with which u are trying to learn his culture is same with him, avoid generalizing his attitude/behavior with whatever you hear about Nigerians.

Find out the things he loves about his country including food, language, fashion etc, ask him to talk more about them and do vice verse, you can surprise him someday with a Nigerian Hair Do, Nigerian Dress attire if it makes u happy,

I am a proud Nigerian and i can beat my chest and say Nigerians all over the world are talented and blessed people.

You would be fine, one step at a time.

Just wondering why these women always ask the same question?
How is the culture?
Does anyone have same experience?