A guy on a date in his new x6 BMW car with his babe. Guy:I have been hiding a secret from u & i think u'll break dis affair if I tell u. Girl:wat is that mylove? Guy:am married. Girl(hitting him on his laps & hissed),u scared me. I thought you wanted to say the car is not YOURS. ehn! Nija Babes na wa o o o

dont smoke and open a thread, if you must smoke dont open a thread, if you must open a thread dont smoke

7 Reasons Why Boys Are Always
Happy
Creatures ? 1: Their Last Name Stays
With
Them Forever,2: Phone Conversations
Last
Just For 30 Secs Flat,3: A Five Day
Vacation
Requires Only One Jeans,4: If
Someone
Forgets To Invite Them,He Can Still Be
Their
Friend,5: The Same Hair Style Lasts
For Years
Or Even Decades,6: They Can Do
Shopping For
25 Relatives In 25 Minutes,7: They
Don't Freak
Out When They Go To A Party N See
Another
Man Wearing The Same Shirt, Instead
They
Become Buddies.

Ozegbe:

dont smoke and open a thread, if you must smoke dont open a thread, if you must open a thread dont smoke

I appreciate ur kind responds, one love

A farmer Samson buys several pigs, hoping to breed them for ham, bacon, etc. After several weeks, he notices that none of the pigs are getting pregnant. He decides to call a local vet Abiola for advice. The vet tells the farmer that he should try artificial insemination. Samson doesn't have the slightest idea what the Abiola means.

Not wanting to display his ignorance, Samson only asks Abiola how he will know when the pigs are pregnant. Abiola tells him that they will stop standing around, and will instead, lay down and wallow in the mud when they are pregnant. Samson hangs up and gives it some thought. He comes to the conclusion that artificial insemination means he has to impregnate the pigs himself.

So he loads the pigs into his truck, drives them out into the woods, has *sex* with them all, brings them back home and goes to bed. Next morning, he wakes and looks out at the pigs. Seeing that they are all still standing around, he concludes that the first try didn't take, and loads them into his truck again. He drives them out to the woods, bangs each pig twice for good measure, brings them back and goes to bed.

Next morning, he wakes to find the pigs still standing around. One more try, he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up and drive them out to the woods. He spends all day shagging the pigs, and upon returning home, falls into bed.

Next morning, he can't even raise himself from the bed to look at the pigs. He asks his wife to look out and tell him if the pigs are laying in the mud. "No" she says, "they're all in the truck and one of them's honking the horn!"

hahahaha,
the last joke got me!
Kelly, you are one hell of a funny guy!!

mikuz:

hahahaha,
the last joke got me!
Kelly, you are one hell of a funny guy!!

pls. use heaven not hell

The last one is funny

mtchewwww e no sweet

A woman buys a new sim card,
puts it in her phone to surprise
her husband who is seated on the
couch in the living room. She goes
to the kitchen, makes her voice
sexy & calls her husband with the
new number "hi darling", the
husband responds in a low tone
"let me call you back later honey,
that pig is in the kitchen.

> lol@ the 3rd joke, kellynoah make we fb, hw can i found u there? I like ur jokes.

A man went to a
resturant
and bought a wine. A lorry
driver in d same
resturant
suddenly took d wine and
drank all. The man began to
cry and d lorry
driver told him dat
he was joking & he
would buy anoda 4 him. The man replied 'im nt crying
cuz of dat". Today, i
was sacked and on
getting out, my car
has been stolen. I
took a taxi home but left my wallet in it.
When i got home, i
met my wife having
s*ex with my gate
man. On getting out, i saw my daughter
kissing a mad man. Now i came to dis
restaurant
and now u still drink
my poison.

lolz the galz love his BMW not him