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Culture / Re: Your Views On Polygamy? by aaliyah06(f): 2:46am On Apr 01, 2007
Iyke-D:

@aaliyah06

If indeed your experience as detailed above was true, I commend you for being forthright and for sharing.

The way I see it, some people are far more possessive or jealous than others. For such people, the concept
of polygamy or "sharing" is unthinkable. For others, it may not be such a big deal.

Like anything else, polygamy has its drawbacks. But buying into the myth that polygamy or everything that
is associated with it is a NO-NO as portrayed in the West is pure farce.  I doubt if there is any conclusive
research to prove that children born in Polygamy are less happier than those in a monogamous homes. As
a matter of fact, most of the successful people in Nigeria today are all products of polygamous marriages. I
hope people realize that what goes on in Utah or in the Mormon Church is not a shining example of how
Polygamy is practiced - it is an exception when compared to the African example.

I have seen polygamy up close in action. Yes there is the feuding siblings and the jealous wives, but there
is also a lot of love in a polygamous home. No where is it truer that there is strength in numbers than in a
polygamous home - let an outsider mess with one of the kids and you will get the beating of your life from
one of the many bothers or sisters.  In my opinion, if the man is financially able and fair in his dealings, he
is sure to end up with a home that mirrors any in terms of happiness in a monogamous home.  Of course,
in polygamy, double trouble may also equate to double happiness just as one ends up with singular trouble
and singular happiness in monogamy. In a way its similar to couples or individuals that chooses not to have
children. You get to enjoy all your freedom and live your life un-bothered, but then when you get older, you
also get to live and suffer alone without any adult child to ask after you. You pay your dues now or later!   


Isn't it ironic, that in the West (US especially) Gay marriage is in fashion, but Polygamy is so frowned upon
as if its a disease. Then of course, you have swingers and every other alternative or underground lifestyles
that is going mainstream too.  Its important to note however, that polygamy is back in the debate in the US
somewhat. Whatever you decide to do, please make sure you understand our capabilities/limits and are not
running afoul of the laws of the land where you live.

Lastly, to the person who suggested that polygamy was responsible for the high rate of infidelity in Nigeria -
you are dead wrong. American men or most men at that are not any more faithful to their wives than Nigerian
men! There is just no corelation, the difference is that infidelity is more hidden in American society than it is in
Nigeria. Here, more romantic words and flowers are used, but the status quo remains. Of course, women can
make your life more miserable here than in Nigeria - but cheating still goes on!!!!!!!


Well said Iyke-D. And for the person/s that say a gay marriage is better than one of polygamy. Well in my humble opinion to buy into the sickness and perverted ludeness of the gay individuals is insane. God said man for woman not man for man or woman for woman. Read your Bible or Quran and no where will you see that this behavior is accepted by God without Him DESTROYINGthe people that indulged in this particular life style. However those that where closest to God (His Prophets and Messangers where always those that lived and praticpractice pologamy to it truest form. Please correct me if I am wrong. Look time changed but never the word of God. He has not condoned plural marriage. But to each his own. undecided

1 Like

Culture / Re: Your Views On Polygamy? by aaliyah06(f): 6:34am On Mar 31, 2007
[size=14pt][b]I am African American. I am very pretty and don't suffer from low self esteem and guess what I have no problem with AN OTHER WIFE FOR MY HUSBAND.  When I lived in the USA before I was able to move to (to live and die in  grin)Ikeja to be with my husband I eencouragedhim to find a wife to care for him until I got to Nigeria. He never did but I had no issue with it at all. I was very secure with myself and I was concerned that he would not be well taken care of while I was still in the USA. I would have loved for another women in need of a good man to take care of my husband. He is a good man and he needed a good women to care for him. I went so far as to look for a 2nd wife for him. He never accepted her but he liked the idea that I loved and cared for him so much that I wanted him to have 24 hour love and care. Even though we are now divorced I would have never done anything differant to show my man my love and appreciation. He was then and still now is a good person. Anyway that is this American womens point of veiw. [/b] [/size]
Romance / Re: What Do African Men Want In A Woman! by aaliyah06(f): 5:59am On Mar 31, 2007
[b]I have been waiting for a post like this.  All I can say is be yourself. Men see right though a fake a$$ women. Be it her hair, nails, fake breast or padded buttom fake attitude (if you a bytch sistas you a bytch dont fake the funk). If you are not real and true to thyself it was all for nothing. Be yourself sistas WE ARE THE BOMB ayways. No need to be anything other than you. Men love the real thing baby.

I love Maya Angelou. She wrote a poem that has inspired me to be the best I can be and true to myself. Hope you all enjoy reading it as much as I love sharing it with you.The poem is long but well worth reading. Please enjoy.


Phenomenal Woman

by Maya Angelou

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies
I'm not cute or built to suit a model's fashion size
But when I start to tell them
They think I'm telling lies.
I say
It's in the reach of my arms
The span of my hips
The stride of my steps
The curl of my lips.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally
Phenomenal woman
That's me.

I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please
And to a man
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees
Then they swarm around me
A hive of honey bees.
I say
It's the fire in my eyes
And the flash of my teeth
The swing of my waist
And the joy in my feet.
I'm a woman
Phenomenal woman
That's me.

Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me
They try so much
But they can't touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them
They say they still can't see.
I say
It's in the arch of my back
The sun of my smile
The ride of my breasts
The grace of my style.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally
Phenomenal woman
That's me.

Now you understand
Just why my head's not bowed
I don't shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud
When you see me passing
It ought to make you proud.
I say
It's in the click of my heels
The bend of my hair
The palm of my hand
The need for my care.
'Cause I'm a woman
Phenomenally
Phenomenal woman
That's me.
[/b]
Events / Re: Sagittarius Meet Zone! by aaliyah06(f): 1:08am On Mar 29, 2007
[size=14pt]Sagittarius in the house. December 16th here. [/size]
Dating And Meet-up Zone / Re: Meet Singles - 32 Years And Above by aaliyah06(f): 1:04am On Mar 29, 2007
I am happy to see a thread that is for those of us 32 and up. I am 38. I look damn good for my age as I am sure most of us here do as well. Come on. Cant we just all get a long. grin I mean who is down for some fun. I know I am. Can this thread continue? I sure hope so. Let's get this party started right. tongue
Dating And Meet-up Zone / Re: Pictures Of Nairaland Members. by aaliyah06(f): 12:39am On Mar 29, 2007
To dremoney

Thanks.
Food / Re: My Husband Is Igbo But I Can't Cook! by aaliyah06(f): 3:37am On Mar 28, 2007
Hey Igbowife. Girl just email me I was married to a Igbo man for years and I have tons of recipes. Email me and I will send them to you. SOOOOOO easy to follow. I lived in Nigeria for 3 years and I forced myself to learn how to cook for my man and his family. Hahaha the only good thing that came out of my divorce was my beautiful daughter and that I learned how to cook. Egusi grin
Dating And Meet-up Zone / Re: Pictures Of Nairaland Members. by aaliyah06(f): 2:15am On Mar 25, 2007
Hahahaha good for you. I am in the USA, Phoenix, AZ

Dating And Meet-up Zone / Re: Pictures Of Nairaland Members. by aaliyah06(f): 1:57am On Mar 25, 2007
hahahaha no the pic cant get any bigger, Sorry,
Dating And Meet-up Zone / Re: Pictures Of Nairaland Members. by aaliyah06(f): 1:21am On Mar 25, 2007
At my bro home,

Dating And Meet-up Zone / Re: Pictures Of Nairaland Members. by aaliyah06(f): 1:17am On Mar 25, 2007
Hey everyone. This is a new pic of me.

Forum Games / Re: Can U Do Without?: by aaliyah06(f): 5:32am On Feb 09, 2007
I don't think I would ever want to do without love, friends, family, MONEY,  I have in the past and it was the most aweful time of my life,  I think I am afraid to be without a man in my life,  I don't really feel complete,  Life is no fun without a partner to share it with,    undecided
Dating And Meet-up Zone / Re: I Need A Real Niaja Woman by aaliyah06(f): 8:55am On Feb 06, 2007
Hahah yes I can cook Niaja style,  I lived and learned in Nigeria in Igbo land from my ex mother in-law,  I was there for 2 years and had to cook for my husband everyday (my ex now),  I never allowed the house girl to cook for him,  My man had to eat my food (unless his mother was at my house and wanted to cook),  When it was time for me to leave they had to drag me on the plane,  Kicking and screaming!!!!  cry I plan to go back an live there soon,  I love Nigeria. Viva Nigeria grin
Dating And Meet-up Zone / Re: Pictures Of Nairaland Members. by aaliyah06(f): 8:45am On Feb 06, 2007
hahaha poor Uche,  Read what her signature says,  hahahaha "Lesbians Rule. Don't Hate." But it is all good,  To each their own,   wink
Dating And Meet-up Zone / Re: Pictures Of Nairaland Members. by aaliyah06(f): 8:39am On Feb 06, 2007
We are all entitled to our own opinions.  We dont have to like everyone,  Hahahahah I know I don't. But I do respect people.  I guess my parents taught me a great leason of diversity and acceptance of others, be it their looks, creed, color, sexual orientation, or religion.  How to appreciate diversity and see beauty in all things.   I don't allow what people say or think about me define who I am.  I know I am the bomb and it does not take another man or women to tell me other wise.  To bad we can't all pratice that. Beautiful balck sista here and damn proud of it.    grin
Dating And Meet-up Zone / Re: Pictures Of Nairaland Members. by aaliyah06(f): 8:23am On Feb 06, 2007
It seems to me that insults are never meant to be insults once they have been said here,  I really don't understand how an insult to someone could have been a joke,  Mean what you say an say what you mean,  And if you cant do that. Please be clear,   cry
Dating And Meet-up Zone / Re: Pictures Of Nairaland Members. by aaliyah06(f): 8:17am On Feb 06, 2007
@ Free,  hahahaha. I never have to shop, or fish or beg or dig for anything "and" never said I looked good,  I told the person that sd I still good Thanks,  Please review the post and you might find the post sweety,  Please read what I said,  It was that I had good genes and besides I don't see you throwing up any pics,  Good or bad,   undecided There is really no need for your insulting comments,  Its best when we have nothing good to say to just keep our mouth  lipsrsealed hahahahaha oh my goodness,  hater,  hahahahahaha
Dating And Meet-up Zone / Re: Pictures Of Nairaland Members. by aaliyah06(f): 8:00am On Feb 06, 2007
@Uche2anna, You seemed surprised,
Dating And Meet-up Zone / Re: Pictures Of Nairaland Members. by aaliyah06(f): 7:52am On Feb 06, 2007
Hahaha, just go back a couple of pages and you will see me, hahahaha tongue
Dating And Meet-up Zone / Re: Pictures Of Nairaland Members. by aaliyah06(f): 7:45am On Feb 06, 2007
[size=14pt]Ok this time I made sure cap lock is off before I started typing,  Hehehehe  tongue And for those that asked my age I am 38 I will be 39 Dec 16,  I guess I got pretty good genes,  When I tell people how old I am they never believe me,  But thanks to those that think I still look good,  I think you are the bomb too,   kiss Moi!!![/size]

Dating And Meet-up Zone / Re: Pictures Of Nairaland Members. by aaliyah06(f): 2:42am On Feb 04, 2007
[size=16pt]Oh well, Like I said. It is not my intention to be rude I just forgot to take cap lock off, Not trying to set fire to the kitchen, [/size] cry
Dating And Meet-up Zone / Re: Pictures Of Nairaland Members. by aaliyah06(f): 2:38am On Feb 04, 2007
[size=18pt]Sorry I always forget to take off cap lock when I type, I like all caps, Not screaming, Just like caps, hehehehehe cry[/size]
Dating And Meet-up Zone / Re: Pictures Of Nairaland Members. by aaliyah06(f): 2:36am On Feb 04, 2007
[size=18pt]EXCUSE ME Uche2nna,  WHAT DO YOU MEAN,  [/size]
Dating And Meet-up Zone / Re: Pictures Of Nairaland Members. by aaliyah06(f): 2:33am On Feb 04, 2007
[size=20pt]OK I AM HAVING FUN NOW, 1 MORE, HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OK DONE, [/size]

Dating And Meet-up Zone / Re: Pictures Of Nairaland Members. by aaliyah06(f): 2:31am On Feb 04, 2007
[size=20pt]AND FROM THE SIDE Y'ALL[/size]

Dating And Meet-up Zone / Re: Pictures Of Nairaland Members. by aaliyah06(f): 2:29am On Feb 04, 2007
[size=20pt]WOOPS!!!!!!!!!!!!! OK HERE WE GO!!!!![color=#006600][/size]

Dating And Meet-up Zone / Re: Pictures Of Nairaland Members. by aaliyah06(f): 2:27am On Feb 04, 2007
[size=20pt]Her is 1 on me,  Hey everyone,  Holla!!![/size]
Dating And Meet-up Zone / Re: I Need A Real Niaja Woman by aaliyah06(f): 2:12am On Feb 04, 2007
Ok that is sooooo unfair.  There are plenty of Amerian  / European ladies that can run rings around a niaja girl,  Hahahaha,  Put me in the room with a bunch of beautiful niaja girls and I will fit right in,  Not to mention I make the bomb egusi soup and heck yes I make pouded yam without the lumps.  It will remind you of home.  100% Niaja American here.  Hahahahaha  grin

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