₦airaland Forum

amazinghands:
I relocated to the United States about eight years ago. My relationship with my dad has been strained and continues to deteriorate.

Background:
I grew up in a lower-middle-class family with both my mom and dad working hard. Everything changed when my dad started earning significant money. His newfound wealth led to a lifestyle filled with parties, women, and alcohol (to be fair, he earned his money, so he had the right to spend it as he pleased). He built a hotel and was barely home afterward.

2010:
While I was in college, I wanted to leave Nigeria due to the incessant ASUU strikes. I told my dad I wanted to study abroad. Initially, he agreed and gave me the funds to start the process. I was admitted to a school in Ukraine and secured a visa, but he later said he couldn’t afford to send me abroad. This decision felt contradictory, as his lifestyle said otherwise. (To be fair, it’s his money, and he has the right to decide how to spend it.)

2016:
I got admitted to a master’s program in the U.S. and approached my dad for help again. He told me to "cut my coat according to my size" and said he couldn’t sell any of his properties for the sake of a child studying abroad. (Again, to be fair, he was right—he had already paid for my college tuition in Nigeria.) Around the same time, he married another wife.

On the other hand, my mom sold her only piece of land and some jewelry to give me half of my first semester's tuition. After involving family members, my dad reluctantly gave me ₦400,000, stating that was all he could afford. I thanked him for the support.

Fast Forward to Today:
I struggled and worked odd jobs to make ends meet, determined never to ask him for help again. Over time, I’ve become financially stable, secured a good job, and am now a permanent resident. I give my dad a monthly allowance and occasionally send more during festive seasons. My mom, on the other hand, gets spoiled with gifts, extra money, and I’ve even invited her to visit and spend time with me in the U.S.

Now, my dad is broke and has suggested I buy him a car and increase what I do for him, despite the fact that my parents are separated and he currently lives with his second wife. I’ve told myself I won’t go above and beyond for him, especially since he chose to prioritize his lifestyle and the new wife (who came with a stepson). I find it hard to reconcile his past decisions with his current expectations.

Am I in the wrong here?

"I find it hard to reconcile his past decisions with his current expectations"
This line got me

Anambra Amaka

Is he Dissing the drug Baron?

helinues:
You can as well enter bush. You guys can never silence anyone again on this forum.

If you feels disgruntled, that one concern you.

Goal number 1
Rashford
GGMU

Finally, he has gone to meet his 72 virgins

It saddens my heart that Nigeria Government are protecting these miscreants.
Touch any of them, police and army even the DSS go full everywhere

Richtaiwo:
From the last picture, it is obvious Peter obi actually went there in his signature black dress. Someone just felt the black thingy is getting out of hand and decided to give the clown a top with at least some white designs.

But wait o. Has Peter Obi ever attended events such as marriage, inaugural lectures, graduation ceremony or any other events that call for joyful celebration? Did anyone notice he is always absent in any of these events. Just check last week marriage in kano that was attended by Atiku and other prominent politicians. Peter Obi will never be in that event. Instead, he sent Chinedu GRV.

In this era where Internet is readily available, you choose to be ignoramus.
Quick recovery

Why covering her face?
Need to know her very well

How did this grace fp.?
This NL mods no get sense again

GenFunction:
leaving Tinubu;wife,seyi and wike

You sure say they no go run join?

GenFunction:
So wrong...4 out of 4 wantu to japa

One day, everybody go run comot for this country

Very wrong, 1of 2 is the accurate stat.

What do you expect when they operate as UGM?

Agba baller.
He deserves the CAF too

Those police officers, may UGM visit them in like manner Amen!

You see why you said, calm down fess for those that wanted to pay up debt accrued by Bulabu-babablu when they saw our debt per head.
Listen, Baba na borrow finish.
This is morning

For you to conceal of what charlatans masquerading as police officers are doing?

Somebody echo IGBO AMAKA!

Lolz they carried this thing at last.
Nzogbu - Nzogbu politics

Already changing it to worst!

SA right now, .........
Describe them with a phrase.
Me: ntóó

yarimo:
Army should react immediately and kill all criminals in that axes please

Unfortunately, there is no criminal there.

Lolz 😂
This people sef

innobarca:
Thanks.

But next time do not reply anyone that wrote such here,,so many of them come to my WhatsApp to ask for assistance and if u don't give them,they become offended.

Nawaooh.
Tarnishing someone's reputation on public forum.

Meti99:
So this 12year old little girl is now in the class of inventors😅
And me I am 32 I never invent anything
Chai, I need to double my work

Bros, you don invent children naw?
Abi that one no follow?

She is more useful than T-pain

BlindAngel:
Good evening Nairalanders, few months ago I posted here regarding how my wife forced me into marriage that I wasn't in anyway ready for because she got pregnant. I posted about the regret I'm still battling until date, because the love isn't there from my own end and I'm also not in anyway attracted to her physically. I have told her severally that I want to option out of the marriage and not doing again but until date she has refused to let me go.

Back to the main point, my wife lost her dad this morning. Her deceased dad has two wife's and several concubines that gave birth to lots of children, my wife doesn't know some of her half brothers and sisters.

So I went to their family house this morning to console them. The eldest son of the family (her half brother) told me and another in law that we'd be the one to pay for mortuary expenses and casket, and when the burial is getting closer they'd give us a list of things to buy and we'd both bring one goats each.

To be brutally honest I wasn't mad because of this latest expense, I got furious immediately and right on the spot because of the pressure my wife pressured me into getting married to her, by now I'd have been totally free of these unnecessary expenses. More than 19 of her sisters, both biological and half sisters that has given birth, no single expense was listed for their man that they got pregnant for and has a child for. But I and the other in law that paid dowry are the one going through these unnecessary expenses.

So immediately he told me about everything, I charged at my wife right on the spot, right in front of her mom, her brothers, her sisters and some of her friends that came for condolence visit. I got so furious and started shouting at the top of my voice, I reminded her how she forced me into marriage that I'm not in anyway prepared and ready for, both physically, psychologically, emotionally, financially. (I have been reminding her regarding this almost on a daily basis and whenever we are quarreling.

I reminded her how she threatened me with suicide and our of fear of the unknown I wasted almost 4m in getting married to her. I told her that I'd have been free of these expenses if not for her pressure.

Immediately she burst into tears, and started crying endlessly.

Her mom and sisters started yelling at me and I yelled back at all of them. They told me I met her a Virgin and now she's no longer good for me (truly, the whole family thought that I was the one that took her virginity) My wife and I agreed to keep it a secret, but the constant remainder from her mom and sisters made me let the cat out of the bag, I told them that I didn't met her a Virgin that she has already started having sex when I met her, they didn't believe me but with my tone, I know they'd.

I also made mentioned that I'm not buying any goat or paying for mortuary or taking any list from them. That it's their dad and they should take care of every responsibilities, after all he has uncountable children, why putting some of the expense on me? I walked away, and switched off my phone until now that I'm just putting it on.

I know that I acted wrongly and allowed my anger to get the best part of me. But I was furious because no single bill went to her sister's baby father's, absolutely nothing was listed for them. I got furious because these expenses won't be on me right now if not for her pressuring me into marriage that I want ready for. I was furious because I and the other in law that they billed became the scape goat by doing the right thing by getting married and not leaving theirs daughter In ruins, where as those that got their daughter pregnant without getting married to them were totally free from these unnecessary bills. I'm in so much pains and regret right now.

Bros, you acted wrongly intoto!
You could have remained calm, pick the list, do the ones you can do and leave the rest.
They will bury their father!

Afobear:
This guy is a fraud.star and would take your money for vanishing

I have bought two laptops from him.
He even has my advance payment of 50k.
I'm getting third one from him too
He is trustworthy, we haven't met face to face before.

Fleeing Ronu man you mean.
That's their lifestyle

zmanto:
This is called hunger 101
Remember we just started the course and our lecturer is mr president

Rest in peace to the dead

Duration of the course is 4yrs, it can be extended to 8yrs if we no grab anything taught by the lecturer who is Mr T-pain