₦airaland Forum

Water101:
Am suprise at this age u are yet to have a serious relationship,na wa o.The shame they are talking about is wedlock baby,imagine!!! Madam must u vomit everything,dnt tell them about where u are searching 4 job.let me tell u something they want u to continue to remain dependant on them,they won't find u a job and they are hoping u won't get one.They know when u start counting cash they have to slowdown,i know exactly what it means to be in ur situation we women don suffer am sure if it a male they won't try such.pray to God for a good job or husband,marriage or job will deliver u 4rm this misery me i no advice staying alone o.let ur male friend come to the house if they talk on marriage tell them u jst met hin & u guys are getting to know each other.devil can use anybody even parent to frustrate our life.refuse frustration remain prayful,positive and communicative.Rule out what u do not like to them,don' t be afraid to speak ur mind or discuss with some1 they respect alot 2 talk 2 them.

thanks dear

azelab:
Just tell your man that anytime he want to see you, he should walk into your house and ask of you even if your daddy is there, he just need to greet them politely and ask for you politely. If the hubby is really interested in marrying you, he would be bold to come to meet with your parents, your parent acted in the best way. At your age you are not expected to be hanging out with any man except he comes to your house for visitation and you too pay him visitation.

my parents wont allow any kind of visitation if it is not marriage visitation, and how do u just get married to someone without going into a relationship first, it has always been like this since i became a teen uptil now, if a guy calls and calls that i should hang out and i dont because of my parents restrictions, once he comes to the house to look for me and they ask him if he is coming for marriage and he doesnt give a positive answer they just act rude to the person and sends him away not caring to find out if we just met.

chiddyok:
My sister, apply to a make up or baking school. Join your church group and stuff. learn to do your small small waka with sense. You aren't being deceitful, but you'll get your space and they'll get their peace of mind. Since the bird has learnt to fly without perching, the Hunter must learn to shoot without missing.

my brother it is so bad that i cant even attend church programs from different churches except ours, and even when i go for ours once it gets to 7pm they want me to fly back home, even if the service is not closed.

madridguy:
First, do you have any past antecedent that make your parent acting this way? If not, then you need to talk to your mum and remember her your age. You need to remind her cos our parent at times can be funny, they might still be seeing you as a small girl.

You need to let her know your mates out there are already married, living independently and making decision themselves without anyone restriction.

If you can be able to pass this message to your mum, she will know how to pass across to old man.

Don't know if they have a package for you " I mean a man they want to give you to "

i have never done anything in the past to make them question my character, its is so bad that once my phone rings and i am not close to my phone or it is a guy calling my Mom would pick the call and start interrogating the person to know why he is calling me, instead of calling me to come answer my call.

yanabasee:
Tell that ur friend to engage you properly, meet your parents and let his intentions opened to them.....


I see the problem coming from you....

You know the kind of parents that you have and so you should be able to know what they like and dislike....


Again, go and look for a job to do...stop staying indoors... learn skills or get busy... 26yrs old and nothing crosses your mind except boyfriend??

i have tried everything i can, getting a job most times when i have to submitt my c.v at a place or go for an interview, they start complaining that i shudnt go or that kind of place is not good to work at, several times i have complained that ok they shud help me out in getting a job but it is one excuse or the other or keep post poning it.

clarocuzioo:
Your parents are simply doing what they are supposed to do, do not take offence or misunderstand them. First thing you have to understand is that you are their investment and they will protect their investment in anyway they deem necessary so that the value does not depreciate.
They don't want to see you in your friend's car, rather in your husband's car. What stops your friend from coming for your introduction so that your family will not be pissed off when they see you with him because he has officially declared his intention towards you.
Remember all your parents are doing is for your best interest, yes sometimes they can be very annoying but it's all for your own good, because they don't want any shame in the family.

what kind of shame would i bring to them, that i did not bring all this while.

clarocuzioo:
Your parents are simply doing what they are supposed to do, do not take offence or misunderstand them. First thing you have to understand is that you are their investment and they will protect their investment in anyway they deem necessary so that the value does not depreciate.
They don't want to see you in your friend's car, rather in your husband's car. What stops your friend from coming for your introduction so that your family will not be pissed off when they see you with him because he has officially declared his intention towards you.
Remember all your parents are doing is for your best interest, yes sometimes they can be very annoying but it's all for your own good, because they don't want any shame in the family.

thanks for the advice but you dont just meet a guy and the next minute he goes to your parents for introduction, without building up on something first.

madridguy:
Hmmmmmmmmm

please say something i want to know if i am the problem, because this whole thing is driving me nuts

I am so angry right now, i feel like my head will explode. i need you all to read what i am about to write and advice me because i dont know if i am the problem.
I am a 26 year old lady who still lives with my parents because my parents wont want to hear that i am living alone, i barely have friends and since i am still looking for a job i am always at home frm Monday to Sunday, i go out like just once or twice a month that is when i have an interview or i want to make my hair, or rush out to see my friend. during this occasion once it gets to 6:30pm my phone starts ringing repeatedly and when i pick it is shout upon shout from my parents that what the hell am i still doing outside when it is so late. i am been so honest as possible, so that u guys can tell me truthfully if i am at fault. i have a relationship and because my friend goes to work and comes back in the evenings i only sitout in his car to gist for like 30mins before he goes home. the other sunday after coming back from church i decided to step out for an occasion with my friend, time was 12:45pm in the afternoon, u needed to have seen the way my Mom started shouting on me that where am i going to, and who do i want to go and see, that i am not allowed to leave the house. and this happens all the time all tru my life. i ignored her and stubbornly went out and it wasnt funny that day when i came back. hell was let loose. i am not really the extrovert type coupled with the fact my parents dont allow us step an inch. The worst that happened this evening was when my friend came back from work and stopped by my place to see me, i sat in his car outside my house in a decent manner but unfortunately my Dad came out of the compound, saw me and when he went in he started shouting on my younger sister who is 24yrs old to come and tell me that, if he gets to come out he would come and disgrace me and give me injuries, that i want to bring disgrace and make everyone feel i wasnt trained properly, this happened some minutes past 7pm today. Please friends i want to know if i am the one being unreasonable because this entire thing is driving me insane. this whole thing is affecting my relationship life. it is so bad that once my phone rings and i am not close to my phone or it is a guy calling my Mom would pick the call and start interrogating the person or shouting on the person asking to know why he is calling me, instead of calling me to come answer my call.
please pardon my typo errors i am boiling presently so it is the cause of typing fast. Advice needed.........Lalasticlala ishilove please you guys should push this to FP i need as plenty advice as i can get.