naturalwaves:

Failure is relative. By saying she is a failure, I was referring to the "home front". My opinion obviously cannot affect her because she is yet to see my opinion unless you send this link to her. So, that point of yours does not follow. Moreover, it is obvious she is depressed and has been affected by other opinions. Hence, the reasons for her rants and undertone regrets.

Having said that, seems alot of you do not know what "independent " means. Even though she used the word "independent", the write up does not paint "independence ". It paints a picture of resentment towards one's family and that's the part you're turning a blind eye to and not analysing well.

Moreover, how can you tell that she raised responsible children? Because they are in the UK? Or what?? Doesn't it even beg the question for you to say that she "raised" when she was never there? The only thing she seems to have done which we can attest to is the fact that the children came through her birth canal and even madd women are capable of this too. We do not even know the children's source of funding and I won't be surprised if her own money is meant for holidays and jamborees while the husband gives the children the best with his hard earned cash. So, my dear, she is a failure. I repeat!

You're right..Failure is relative. So you'll forgive me if I don't agree that she should be labelled as one.

I take exception to the UK comment and I'll throw the question back at you. Why do you think they aren't responsible?

You analysed the write-up perfectly and I'm sure you observed the tone of regret. She regrets not 'treating' her children differently. I use the word 'treating' because you might end up misconstruing my use of the word 'raising' like you did earlier.
It takes a strong person to own up to their mistakes and that's what you don't seem to realise.
She doesn't regret choosing her career over her home... That's what you have a problem with.

We do not know the children's source of funding and we would be wrong to assume that she has not contributed one way or the other to their upkeep.
Holidays and jamborees? How do you come up with these things?

Stop making assumptions based on sentiments.

Tollzara:
She had to abandon her children because of her career? Why should there even be the question of abandoning one for the other? What did her husband do wrong to warrant divorce? She didn't say. Does that mean she made her marital vows with a mendacious tongue, if she could divorce him when she felt like, without any justifiable or cogent reason {which she should have stated, since the man is a human being with feelings, and there were obligations and responsibilities that marriage demanded of her which would have been part of his expectations towards her-----if she divorced him simply because she felt like, then it is no different from telling him that he's of no consequence and only her own feelings mattered, in which case, why did she decide to get married in the first place?}?

She could have saved her career and family, no? Or didn't she have responsibilities towards those kids? If she didn't care, she shouldn't have had them. She could remain single and childless, if she wanted to live as a single and childless woman. No one has the right to behave anyhow they want when dealing with humans-----human beings are not toys or inanimate objects.

I believe there was no need to abandon her family for her career, since it was possible to keep both. She wasn't engrossed in any project to build bridges to heaven or dig tunnels to hell. She works in academia and I don't see how that stops her from having time for her family. Or is she the only one in her line of work who's passionate about building a career?

She's just an irresponsible and self-centered woman, and there's everything worth condemning about her. No one should emulate such a shitty life.

As much as I respect your views, I have to disagree with a few points you made.

Not everyone is cut out for marriage. Not every woman can handle being a mother.
You raised a salient point when you talked about the responsibilities she had towards her children. I also agree that she should have stayed single if she knew she couldn't juggle a career along with the burden of raising children.

Seeing as I'm not aware of her private affairs and she didn't divulge all the details of the divorce, I have no way of knowing what went on between she and her husband before their separation.
There are several avenues to consider and calling her irresponsible and self-centred will change nothing.

What I do not agree with is the name-calling. It's always easy for us to judge people and the decisions they make without having first-hand knowledge of what made them follow that path.

angels09:

Stop the nonsense there! She didn't raise any child. Mark my words the children hate, loathe and despise her.

Don't take your frustrations out on me.

You clearly have a problem with being objective.

angels09:

Why is she granting the useless interview? Her monkey her zoo....how many times have you seen other scholars grant such yeye interviews. She's simply not intelligent enough for the career

You said it yourself...Why then are you giving yourself a headache?

naturalwaves:

There are lots of loopholes in this argument of yours. Marriage does not have to be an achievement, no one is saying that but she didn't try at all. She even used and dumped the husband. Lol.

Moreover, you tell me, what are the working schedule of someone in the academia that can make them abandon the home for career? Education is one career area that offers the greatest liberty of time . Most people around me are educators. She failed woefully for not being able to juggle an educational career with a balanced family life. F9! And to think that she didn't make any groundbreaking discovery despite this is such a big shame.

According to you, she's a failure for not being able to juggle an educational career and a balanced family life.
That's your opinion and I respect it... does your opinion affect her as a human being? No it doesn't. Does it affect me? Not in the least.

She raised up responsible and independent children. Although she regrets not having a closer relationship with them, I say she's a success.

But then... we cannot always agree, can we?!

donstan18:


Sacrificing your home?

How cool does that sound to you?

Sacrificing your career?

How cool does that sound to you?

Look at it this way... Everyone has dreams. Some women dream of being home makers while some women dream of being movers and shakers in their various fields. There are a select few who dream of combining the two..Women who believe that they can build their homes and still make great strides in their chosen field.

I would say the woman in question belongs to the second category. Why should she be faulted for the choice she made?

Dramadiddy:
can I take it off now?

Oh...Of course you can.

The comments on this thread though.

Not every woman sees marriage as an achievement. I don't understand why it's so difficult for people to understand that.

She would've been unfulfilled if she had given up her career for the sake of her family. What works for one person won't work for another.
In life, we all have to make sacrifices. The fact that her decision doesn't sit well with you doesn't make it wrong.

Dramadiddy:
.. will modify soon. expecting your message

Don't be mad if you have to wait a while before getting a message from me.

Do have a nice day.

Dramadiddy:
"my shell is so cozy yen yen yen" do you have Whatsapp now?

You're so silly.
I've always had whatsapp.

Dramadiddy:
decided to come outta ya shell for once.. nice nice.. good to see you anyways

Don't blame me for staying in there. My shell is so cozy. I just decided to take a walk and see what's going on in the land of the humans...

Dramadiddy:
lmao... where you been tho

I've been around.

Dramadiddy:
I bet OP is a futo student.. @ diamond Bank lol

I know right?!
That's the first thing that popped into my head when I read that part.

Tollzara:
You're right. That's why I've made it a habit to always dive into the pacific so that the pressure and waves can push off the worms and wash off the mud. I'll be rid of the stench while having a lot of fun.

David fired pebbles with his sling. Mine is more like launching meteors and setting them aflame.

You're something else!

Do enjoy yourself...a little fun never hurt anyone.

cruchenutii:


You need a spiritual bath.

Sponge = N500
Live Goat = N68,000
Red Tomatoes = 20 Basket
Black Chicken = N3,500

Just contact me, Your problem is solved

This cracked me up!

Tollzara:
Thank you. Don't worry. There's no crime in being fierce towards assholes. We need to fry their asses with fiery stones.

Sometimes, it's best to ignore them...a verbal scuffle with an asshole is not my favourite past time. It takes a lot of energy to get the stink off.

Keep flinging your stones Oh David... I'll be watching from the sidelines.

Tollzara:
Lol. Just helping him out of his confusion. He hates women, so the reason he doesn't hate those ones is because they're shemales.

Fücking monkey.

He's just frustrated...that much is obvious.
Men who belong to the Women Are Scum fan club often are.

Please, be gentle.

OkpaAkuEriEri:


Lyk u r ur family

If only you'd paid more attention in English Class.

Tollzara:
Didn't you experrit?

When I saw his declaration of full-blown misogyny, I knew that dumb line would follow, and the clown didn't disappoint.

His mum and sisters are obviously shemales.

His level of stupidity is outstanding.

Shemales? Haa! You're a funny one.

OkpaAkuEriEri:
Women r witches walahi.
I h8 women.

Excpt my moda n sister

You're obviously confused.

Will people ever tire of making this age-old comparison?

Treasure17:

Of course. They are always on short above their knees any time they want to perform.
Beautiful concert.

Alright then.

fpeter:
The girl wearing a skirt that was lifted up by the guyI hope she wore shorts underneath?

My thoughts exactly.

QuietHammer:

Ya.

Hmmmn

QuietHammer:

Colik

Hi.

Err...do I know you?

Read...Sleep...Surf the net...Watch movies...Eat.

I actually like the song.

"Eni to mọ way lo mowe. Awa lomo to mọ way. Kowo ti pe kowo wole. No be everybody wey go school lo mowe"

Unfortunately, a certain group of people will take this as a form of encouragement to continue their 'runz'.