₦airaland Forum

Morning Jokes
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Chinese Resturant

Lols lojel one day i decide to form a big guy, i went to chinese resturant, i met one girl, walahi i swear i like the girl, the way she trekpas, her waka make person blood dry

me: heey, hello
thegirl: hello
me: i am dpeace, may i know you
thegirl: oh why not, i am jack mo sung
me: wao nice name, can we be friend, i like you
thegirl: sure
me: *happy mood* gimme 'ur contact number.
thegirl: ohkay, sex sex sex till tonight sex
me: wao, tonight sex ?

la so one guy meet us there, and said

theguy: that's not what she me
me: i was like what again nw,
theguy: she mean 6663296



someone please wake me, i don stake for there since lastweek o

Hello World, morning to you all

Lols
I cannot kill myself.......,
today was very funy, i match one stammara girl or wetin dem call them sef, Astagfirllahi, may GOD help me sha,

see our conversation o

thegirl: whyyyyyy, why did u u u u match my my my leg
me: iiiiii i don don don don't mean it, i i i am sorry
thegirl: pitchnew, i i idiot, la la la lazy you you youth
me: see, i i i i like you o,
thegirl: don don don don't deciev me jur,
me: trueeeeee uhmm true to beee told, i lo lo, uhm i lo lo lo lov love you
thegirl: ah ah, don't lo lo love me, am uhn am 'ur lan lan, lan lan landlady


my friend wey dey beside me don faint

Happy Jummah Mubarak


Cc: LightQueen, sosa993, Prudee, Pabon, devilmaycry

Prudee:
Ha ha ha. Na wa o. Papa set dey google

Lols longestime dear

LightQueen:
Ayo no go kee me before my time

Thank GOD na kee i go do for you not kill sha

Lols I cannot kill myself

Cc: LightQueen, Sosa993 Prudee, Pabon, devilmaycry

Dadd: Ayoooo
me: yes daddy
daddy: abeg no daddy me jur, daddy yourself too, dollard buruku
me: am sowie dadd
dadd: uhn uhn, na tell me your position on Lastmonth Nairaland Best Comedian
me: ahah daddy daddy, i don't get naw
dadd: aah see idiot, "bring out his phone, opening google apk"
me: ah ah dadd, what's that for,
dadd: ahah dollard, see na google, i wan search purnishment that fit you, am tired of wastin my data on you


Lols yawa don burst

What's A Motor

Teacher: Morning class
Students: Morning sir.
teacher: today, we will continue from where we stop lastweek friday...
students: *murmring*
teacher: will you please keep shut, do do dollard students., someone please remind me the meaning of "A Motor"

eeehn coman see silence in a noisy class, class don turn to graveyard "me just dey playin with my pencil jejenjeje mi"

teacher: nobody right? ooh Ayo, that's my boy, i know you can't fail me, common.
me: "i was like ah alakoba" *standinup slow* *mute* "don't blame me o"
jamal: talk now
me: a a a motor
teacher: say it and safe others.
me: a a motor is a domestic animal

i heard a laugh and cryin at once, i turn to where the sound came from, pithnew itwas a madman

madmam: thank you for droping the bomb, we shall see you nextweek... *laughing*

me and teacher *fainted*

Yoruba Parent

don't tell me you never do this before

Mum: take this #500 oja're, go to Ojaoba, go buy me, fishe, locus beans, maggie, tomatoes and pepper, be quick o, before your Dadd arrive from work..

Me: okay ma...

"i see one of my friend on field playing football, i join them, play together till dawn, i was like motidaran o(am dum)"

Me: mummy "call her with sob"

Mum: Ayo, you go play ball, o tunti lo gba ball abi, how many time i warn you not to play arround when i sent you on an erran..
oya come here, you go play ryt ?,

beat hell out of my body, forget you 're best player in 'ur street


be ryt back

@Pruden, LightQueen @sosa993

Aaah, it been along time have post here o, may GOD kuku safe me sha, lemme come update small before the Niaraland start joggin by

LightQueen:
Have you tried coconut oil?

go try coconut milk too, it realy work,

be ryt back, i will drop the details be4 i sleep fah

LightQueen:
Ayodipths you wee not kee person with laugh

how can i kill person with laugh, me tha can't even kill a signle cockcroach