₦airaland Forum

Houseontherock1:
You've done the tests all is fine...just move on!

It's not about me, its about my dad wanting my fiance to do the test as well.

ednut1:
red flag. How can you be planning marriage with someone you have never met or even know if you guys are compatible 🤣🤣. Even if you decide to marry her all you need is court marriage your parents are not required to be there

Na your type Ashake dey take sing, (agbongbon ju).
Even those that grew up together and dated for 20 years still have trouble in marriage, some even divorce sef.
I have seen the important ingredient I consider non-negotiable in a marriage in this lady and I love her.

Even if you know someone from birth, its not a fool proof assurance that the marriage will work.

ednut1:
well if this your story is true. Your dad’s request is unreasonable, stand yourself ground. By the way have you met this girl before in real life 😬

Standing my ground will mean my dad, mom and other members of my own family will not attend the wedding cos my dad said he will not attend the wedding if she does not do a fertility test.
No I haven't met her physically yet, we have only been dating online for 10 months now and haven't had a chance to visit Naija but I am visiting naija and will spend 4 months in naija when I visit later this month.

ednut1:
Have you met the girl in real life How well do you know this girl that you are talking marriage. Can a 38 years old man really be asking these kind of questions You just went to the hospital to do fertility tests in the usa while not trying to conceive with a woman.

What exactly is your point ?
What does it take to do a fertility test in the USA, is it not what you tell the doctor he will act on ?
Does he have to follow you home to watch you have sex before giving you a requisition to the lab ?

And what exactly do you mean by a 38 year old asking these kind of questions, I didn't know when you are 38 years old you are above learning from others.

dawnomike:
Well, this shouldn't be a debate considering the fact that you're 38!!! That makes no much sense to me.
By no problem all the same, it is no bug deal for her to do fertility test but just know that you have strained the relationship even before marriage and i wonder how you'll convince her that your parents won't control you in your marriage when you're 40!!!

Let me explain, he says he is not forcing her but if she does not take the fertility test he will not attend the wedding, and he is very likely to prohibit my mom from also attending the wedding and maybe other family members too.

That puts me in a very difficult spot, very difficult spot.

PoliteActivist:
How e take consign your pap? Suppose you or she no want children nko? Na by force?

Guy please don't address my dad like that.

I am a 38 year old Nigerian American citizen dating a 26 year old Nigeria girl.
I grew up in Nigeria but travelled out to the USA when I was 25 years old, I am a citizen now and doing really well for myself.
I met a beautiful and godly Nigerian girl on facebook and we have been dating for some months now we are now thinking of marriage, she is in Nigeria while I am in the USA.

Some weeks ago my dad asked me to do some tests and send to him, (He is a medical doctor), I did them, turns out to be fertility tests and all was perfect.
I just told him about my fiance and my plans to get married in some months time and he said she has to do fertility test before he can agree to the marriage.

This was very shocking for me as he insisted that it is his position, I haven't told my fiance cos I dont know how to and my fiance is scheduled to pay my parents a visit for the first time in Port Harcourt in 2 weeks time.
My fiance is from Delta but lives in Portharcout as my parents while we are from Port harcourt.

My dad has said if I cannot tell her that he will, what do you guys think ?

Honest advise please and admin kindly push to front page for wider advise.

Thanks.