₦airaland Forum

Unbelievably cheap

Still expecting your call.

At your service.

E-mail: bishop2000sp@yahoo.com
Expecting your mails and calls.

08032881690

Expecting your call

Very cheap!

Are you residing or working in Abuja and in need of a reliable vehicle scan?
Search no more because it's just a phone call away from you.
Give me a call on 08032881690 and get your vehicle(s)scanned right away.

Another Abu Qaqa will soon emerge and claim he's not been arrested.

Abu Qaqa is faceless... It's a name reserved for Boko Haram spokespersons.

Well done 2 d JTF guys.

Pls laugh a bit, and enjoy Your weekend with this little joke of the month.

A mum was lucky enuf 2 c her 3 dotas wed in d same year..........

So she whispered to ich of dem afta their weddings..........


"Text me ur 1st Nite Xperience & ƌ̲ø̲п†̥ 4get 2 txt it in code º°˚!"

After a week, d 1st dota sent 'NESCAFE' in an sms 2 ha mum wile a week lata, d 2nd txtd 'BENSON'...........:]Y

Their moda, as a soji woman, picked up a tin of Nescafe & read frm d label; "fantastic till d last drop!"
she also went 2 her huby's pack of Benson Cigarettes & found written on it; "extra long, king size!"
she & tot aloud; 'not 2 bad 4 dem @ dia age sha!({})'

A few days lata, ha 3rd dota's txt coms in; "Arik: Lagos - Kano!"............8-|

So Mama cals Arik Air Information Desk 2 inquire about dia kano-lagos flight!=)]

She was told; "Its 3times daily, 7days a week & the flight duration is 75mins to & fro!B)".
:O :s :& Mama throws herself in d air, lands, slumps & faints shouting...... "Yeeeeee! Eleyi ma pa mi lomo º°˚. (Dis one will kill м̤̣̲̣̥̈̇γ̲̣̣̥ daughter o)
How Ɣ☺ΰ D̶̲̥̅̊ε̲̣̣̣̥γ̲̣̣̥? Enjoy ur wkend.

My Dear Luv ♥,
Yestaday, I Was Passing By ur Rectangular House In Trigonometric Lane.
There I Saw u With ur Cute Circular Face, Conical Nose & Spherical Eyes, Standing In ur Triangular Garden. B4 Seeing u,My Heart Was A Null Set, But Wen A Vector Of Magnitude (Likeness) From ur
Eyes At A Deviation Of Theta Radians Made A Tangent To My Heart ♥ ,It Differentiated.
My Luv 4 u Is A Quadratic Equation With Real Roots, Which Only u Can Solve By Making Good Binary Relation With Me.The Cosine Of My Luv ♥ 4u Extends 2 Infinity. I Promise dat I Should Not Resolve
ur Partial Functions But If I Do So,You Can Integrate Me By Applying de Limits From Zero 2 Infinity. U Are As Essential 2 Me As An Element 2 A Set.
The Geometry Of My Life Revolves Around ur Acute Personality.My Luv,If You Do Not Meet Me at Parabola Restaurant On Date 10 At Sunset,Wen The Sun Is MakinAn Angle Of 160 Degrees,My Heart Would Be Like A Solved Polynomial Of 10 Degrees. Wit Luv From ur Higher Order. I send you five star Kisses ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥. Ur Maths Teacher

firstannoyed@dpost_nowlaffin.hug4poster

Still Available.

Still Available.

I have a 4 Bedroom duplex (directly with the owner) with 2 livingrooms, a study, an enclosed garage for 2 cars, 2 room BQ with toilet, shower and kitchen all on a well landscaped 1900sq.m land in a lovely location in Asokoro for N300m (Three hundred million naira only).

Call 08032881690 for more enquiries.
Seriuos Client's only.

U can scan all ur 1996 and newer vehicles in Abuja by just calling on any of these numbers.
08057462280, 070684348499.

I have a newly arrived Mack truck (10 tyres) for hire in Kabusa Abuja.
Call me on 08032881690 for discussions.

It’s a currently big news in Indonesia. Metal wires about 10-20 cm long grow from a woman’s body! Skeptics initially thought that is must be “self-inflicted”. Doctors however, have other theories but have given up on providing any scientific or medical explanations.

The woman had this problem for 18 years and currently being investigated by the Ministry of Health. Initial consultation with doctors and specialists found that the wires are also inside her body. At this stage, there were no current medical explanations or any case ever exist. Hence, there is but only one other possible consideration… Occult magic.

Her name is NOORSYAIDAH. A 40 years old kindergarten teacher from Sangatta, East Kutai. Her first symptoms started manifestating in 1991. The metal wires grew out of her chest and her belly. There was no explanation then (or even now). During the first week wires kept falling off from her body and were gone. A month later, the wires grew back again and from that time onward the wires did not fall. They kept growing

One of her sisters said that she tried to help by trimming the wires. Alas, whenever she trimmed the wires, the wire retreated as if it were hiding and then popped up in another part of Noorsyaidah’s body.


There have been 4 Medical Specialists taking this matter seriously and have treated her in several ways. And as the result, doctors can’t figure out what exactly is happening to her. The doctors have taken an X-Ray image from her stomach and found that there are more than 40 metal wires inside her and some of them are bursting out of her skin. They looks like a living phenomenon. The wires are able mobile and therefore can change location at will, Thus the doctors are forced to use a magnet to scan the exact position of the wires. The wires bursted out without any symptoms of Tetanus, but she said that they’re hurting her like when needles sting

A husband working abroad wrote to his
wife,
Dear Sweetheart,
I can't send my salary this month the global
market crises has affected
, , me, so I am sending 100 kisses. You are mysweetheart.
Your loving husband.

His wife replied, Sweetheart Dearest,Thanks for the 100 kisses, below is the list of expenses I paid with the Kisses,
1. The Milk man agreed on 2 kisses for one month's milk.
2. The electricity man agreed not to disconnect us only after 7 kisses.
3. Your landlord comes every day to take 2 or3 kisses instead of the rent
4. Supermarket owner did not accept kisses only, so I gave him other items hope you understand.
5. Other expenses 40 kisses.
Please don't worry about me, I have a remaining balance of 35 kisses and I'm hoping it sustains us for the-rest-of- month,
Lwkmd

Commercial bus/taxi drivers in Abuja took to the roads this morning protesting what they described as wanton extortion for sundry offences by Police officers in the capital city.

The drivers who blocked all roads leading to the popular Wuse market also complained of lack of official bus stops at most areas in Abuja, a situation they say is being exploited by the Police to arrest their members for wrong parking. The drivers also complained of harassment in the hands of police officers.

One of the protesters carried a placard that reads: “Putting stop to Police embarrassment from(sic) commercial operators”.

The protest lead to a traffic gridlock from areas leading to Wuse market . The drivers blocked all roads leading to and from Wuse market up to the NNPC towers in the Central Business District of Abuja.

The drivers are also stopping some of their colleagues who were on the road with their vehicles from working.

This resulted into commuters trekking long distances as the driver vowed that no vehicle will be allowed to pass through the route.

However, PM NEWS observed that the FCT Police Command has deployed its men across the route of the protesters to ensure that the situation did not get out of hand.

Moshood Jimoh, the Public Relations Officer of the FCT Command of the Nigerian Police was seen leading his men to ensure that the protest is orderly. The protest is still on as at the time of filing in this story.

Dim Chukwuemeka Odumegwu Ojukwu



Former biafran leader and leader of the All Progressive Grand Alliance (APGA) Dim Chukwuemeka Odimegwu Ojukwu is dead.

Thisday can confirm that he died late last night. He had been sick for a while and was receiving treatment at a united Kingdom (UK) hospital.More to follow . . .


Ojukwu was born in Zungeru, Northern Nigeria in 1933. His father, Sir Louis Phillipe Odumegwu Ojukwu was a wealthy businessman who made money from the transport industry. Ojukwu was sent to the UK at the age of 13 to study, first at Epsom College and later at Lincoln College, Oxford University where he earned a Masters degree in History.

Upon his return in 1956, he joined the civil service in then Eastern Nigeria. He would later leave the service to join the military, where he was one of the few university graduates.

Ojukwu was appointed Military Governor of Eastern Nigeria by Military Head of State, General Aguiyi Ironsi on January 17, 1966. By May of the same year, Nigeria was facing a serious crisis. A planned pogrom in Northern Nigeria targeting and killing South-easterners presented a problem. He made several assurances to the South-easterners about their safety but the crisis continued. In May 1967, he declared Eastern Nigeria a Sovereign State named Biafra.

In July, 1967, then Head of State Yakubu Gowon declared war on Biafra. A civil war ensued. The war raged on for another 30 months. An attempt at peace during a meeting at Aburi, Ghana did not stop the war. In 1970, Ojukwu handed over power to his deputy Major-General Phillip Effiong and left the country to avoid assassination. He was granted political asylum in Cote D'Ivoire by President Felix Houphöet-Biogny.

The civilian President of Shehu Shagari granted him an official pardon and he returned in 1982 after 13 years in exile. Ojukwu would later go into politics, forming the All Progressive Grand Alliance (APGA). He was an active member until his death.



(Source: www.thisdayonline.com)

Still Available in Kubwa

I have a set of settee for sale in Abuja as I'm relocating. Interested buyers can call me on 08032881690. Pix too large to upload.

When 46-year-old Alexander Eliemenye, a Customs officer stationed in Niger State, travelled to Lagos where his family lived, and then proceeded to his hometown, Asaba, Delta State, to attend his younger brother’s wedding ceremony, little did the father of three know that he was embarking on a journey of no return.

To prove his brotherly love for a younger sibling, the late Eliemenye embarked on the trip for the wedding with a live goat, a bag of rice, carton of fish, among other gift items for Charles, a brother whom he accommodated for many years, fed and helped secured a paying job. A day after the nuptial rites, Eliemenye was stabbed to death by his newly wedded younger brother, Charles.


In an emotion-laden interview with Entertainment Express which took place at the family’s home at Peace Estate located at Isheri, Alimosho, Lagos, the deceased widow, a Togolese, Augusta Eliemenye narrates the bizarre circumstances surrounding the brutal and untimely death of her husband at the hands of his younger brother.

The tragic story is as spellbinding as it is dreadful. Indeed the late Customs officer had a premonition of an impending doom, and he took caution as only mortals could do. In fact, he travelled to his hometown for the marriage with already-prepared meals just to avoid eating food in the village. “I prepared and packaged the food that he would have eaten for the two days that he was going to spend in the village” the bereaved wife adds tearfully “he saw death coming, but never knew that it would come through his younger brother.”
Describing her husband as a ‘very strong man’, the distraught wife wondered how the younger brother was able to overpower and stabbed him to dead. “My husband was a very strong man; a Customs officer who had been to tough places - even the wild animals inside the bushes that he had treaded upon could not harm him”, she said.
In the presence of her aged mother-in-law who was alleged to have lost consciousness when the sad news broke, Augusta narrated the sad episode of how her husband was killed by his own blood brother.

How it happened
My husband came back on September 13, 2011, from Niger State where he was working as a Customs officer. He told me that he wanted to attend his younger brother’s marriage ceremony scheduled to hold on September 17. I offered to accompany him to the ceremony but he refused, his reason being that December is at hand and we will all go home as it was our tradition. So he travelled alone on September 16 for the ceremony to his home town, Aniocha Local Government, Delta State. He travelled with a live goat, a bag of rice, a carton of fish, among other gift items that he bought for his younger brother, Charles. On Saturday, the D- day, the ceremony was carried out successfully as I was told. The day after the marriage ceremony, which was Sunday, I called my husband around 8 p.m. and he picked the phone but was not talking. In the background, I heard his brother’s voice threatening him: ‘I will kill you. I will burn you together with your car’. I also heard my husband’s response in the background; he was saying: ‘You are too small’. That was all I heard. Then on Monday morning, I returned from the market and met people gathered in my house. I was made to understand that the time I heard their voices quarrelling in the background was about the time my husband was stabbed by his brother. Some of the family members present told me that throughout that Sunday, Charles was insulting and threatening to harm his brother, that is my husband. At a point, elders in the family summoned them and settled their issues. Shortly after, Charles started threatening him again, telling him that he was going to paste his obituary; that he would not be alive during their mother’s burial. It was during this confrontation that he stabbed my husband to death. At that point, according to eye witnesses, my husband shouted: ‘Charles has killed me oh!’ Then Charles immediately took to his heels.

The bone of contention
Charles ‘wife had a dispute with her elder sister. The said elder sister contacted my husband, asking him to intervene, that she didn’t like the way her sister was scandalising her name. She told my husband that since her sister’s husband (Charles) could not caution her, he should intervene, being the elder brother of Charles. My husband waded into the matter by inviting Charles’ wife to our house where he spoke to her to sheath her sword. Charles’ wife, after being cautioned by my husband, went home and quarrelled with the sister again, bitter that she dared to report her to her brother-in-law. From that point, her husband (Charles) started supporting his wife against everybody. That is all that I know; the issue is not something that should generate such tension let alone degenerate to a murderous level.

Moments after he was stabbed
He was rushed to the General Hospital at Aniocha. Unfortunately, the Doctor confirmed him dead on arrival (DOA) as a result of excessive bleeding. he case was immediately reported to the police station, leading to the arrest of his wife as Charles was nowhere to be found till date. She was later transferred to the state CID, Asaba. The wife was caught when she was trying to escape. She was in the police custody for about three weeks after which she was arraigned in the court and bailed on the ground that she was not the culprit, coupled with the fact that she was sick and has children to take care of.

I doubt if Doctor Murray would have gone 2 jail if he were white,
Was he d one dat killed MJ, Y don't vehicle manufacturers go 2 jail
4 every accident on our roads?
I won't play MJ's music anymur until dat black doctor is out of jail, GBAM!!!

FOR the past one year, Anambra State Governor, Mr. Peter Obi has been paying the medical bills of the former Biafran leader, Dim Chukwuemeka Odumegwu Ojukwu which runs into hundreds of millions of naira.

This was made known yesterday by Mrs. Bianca Ojukwu, wife of the ex-Biafran leader while addressing the mammoth crowd that attended the 78th birthday celebration of the Igbo icon, who had been receiving treatment in a London hospital since October last year.

An inter-denominational church service jointly officiated by Monsignor Obiora Ike of the Catholic Diocese of Enugu and the Anglican Bishop of Enugu, Rt. Rev. Emmanuel Chukwuma as well as other clergymen from different churches was earlier held during which prayers were said for the quick recovery of the Ikemba

Bianca said that the survival of Ojukwu since he was bedridden was a miracle, adding that his being alive till date was still a mystery.

Thanking Obi, Bianca said, “The governor of Anambra State was the person who made arrangement for Ojukwu to be flown abroad. Up till today, every month, he comes to London to see him in the hospital. He has been the one paying all his medical bills running into hundreds of millions. This is not a child’s play and I remain grateful to the governor,” she said.

Also, acknowledging the roles played by the National Chairman of All Progressives Grand Alliance, APGA, Chief Victor Umeh and some Igbo leaders who had personally visited Ojukwu in London, Mrs. Ojukwu said that their support and prayers had gone a long way in keeping the man alive till today.

“After almost one year, Eze-Igbo (Ojukwu) has rejected death. He has stared death in the face, and on many occasions he said by the grace of God it is not my portion to die now. It is something to celebrate.

“In all the hospitals that he was attended to in London, the doctors and other medical personnel call Ojukwu the General. I want to tell you all that the General is still here. By the grace of God, he wants to come back in good health and he remains appreciative of all your prayers,” Mrs. Ojukwu said.

She praised the leader of the Movement for the Actualization of the Sovereign State of Biafra, MASSOB, Chief Ralph Uwazulike for initiating the birthday celebration, which she described as a huge success.

Addressing the crowd, Governor Rochas Okorocha of Imo State, urged Igbos to emulate Ojukwu whom he described as the symbol of the unique nature of Igbos, saying only the unity of the Igbos would enable them to actualize collective goals in Nigeria.

He said that the Igbo youths should by all means avoid violence since, according to him, violence cannot take Ndigbo anywhere.

In his remarks, Governor Peter Obi of Anambra State extolled what he regarded as the sterling qualities of the Igbos which made them to occupy first positions in most major public offices in the country before and shortly after independence.

Vanguard Nigeria

Chike no longer rows d boat in d river. He now drives BRT buses in Lasgidi.

Baba Suwe May Soon Become A Consultant To Drug Barons,
WATCH OUT!!!

I doubt If "Adimeru" Is Truly Innocent.


Now He'll Be Demanding A N100m Damages Claim From NDLEA.
This NDLEA Guys Should Also Go And Fortify Themselves Spiritually To Tackle What They Claim 2 Be Highly Potent Black Magic.

News Filtering In From Channels States Baba Suwe Has Just Been Freed On Bail.

This Is Fast Becoming A Season Film Oooo!!!!

O Yagbe Ti (Season 3), GRAB YOUR COFY NOW111

Still Available