₦airaland Forum

U better beg now cause [color=#006600][/color] Olamide fit use a whole album to beaf nd abuse you, ....if u think music a easy drop your track ....

I sight you my Redeem sister.

........where is pastor adeboye...see ya pinkin oh ...may God help us .....

No sense at all...the one we have never turn to standard and una wanna create another one.... am seeing a lot of boko haram nd Evans....

EFCC...oya catch them

only God can settle d matter.....frank is not you ehn ......na economy

Dopeyomi:
Wait till the JAMB official cutoff mark roll out..

More info about polytechnic Ibadan...join our whatapps group chat...08175059392......

More info about polytechnic Ibadan...join our whatapps group chat...08175059392...... More info about polytechnic Ibadan...join our whatapps group chat...08175059392......

Quiz 101 week 27,
Nigeria Senate,.
30 minutes.

Choose the correct answer.
Q1: "I will beat you and nothing will happen" who made this statement.. (5 marks)
A, Bukola Saraki
B. Ekweremadu
C. Dino Melaye
D. OBJ.

Q2: To whom was the statement in Q1 was
directed? (5 marks)
A, Remi Tinubu
B. Diezanne
C. Mrs. Melaye
D. None of the above.

Q3, If Remi Tinubu gets impregnated by Dino, what will the child be in future. (5 marks)
A, A Bastard
B. A billionaire
C. A. Thug
D. Future Nigeria President
E. A Nigerian Senator

Q4. What should be Bola Tinubu's reaction to Dino's statement? (5 marks)
A. Beat Dino
B. Thank Dino
C. Sue Dino to court
D. Do nothing
E. Divorce Remi

Q5. What statement will Bola Tinubu likely make after hearing that his wife will be impregnated by
Dino. (5 marks)
A. Hmmm, Remi, so you and Dino have been doing it together Abi?
B. Hmmm Omo Ale jatijati.
C. Wo Remi, Let Him try it first, and I will show
him what "Magun" is, idiot.
D. Olorun gbo adura wa ni yen (God has finally
answered our prayer)

Q6. Why was Remi Tinubu not scared of Dino's statement? (5 marks)
A. She knows Dino is a liar.
B. She knows Dino cannot perform.
C. She knows Dino can perform.
D. She wants to dare Dino

Q7. What was Bukola Saraki' reaction to Dino's statement? (5 marks)
A. He was quiet.
B. He was shocked.
C. He was happy
D. He was sorry for Dino
E. none of the above.

Q8. Why was Saraki sorry for Dino.? (5marks)
A. He knows Dino is impotent.
B. He knows Bola put Magun on Remi.
C. He also want to impregnate Remi.
D. He is very scared of Tinubu.
E. All of the above.

Q9. What was Ekweremadu's reaction to Dino's statement? (5 marks)
A. He was shocked
B. He wasn't 'happy.
C. He wasn't listening
D. He was happy.
E. None of the above.

Q.10. Ekweremadu did not hear Dino's statement because...... (5 marks)
A. He was not happy.
B. He was thinking about his jail term.
C. He was thinking about his forgery case.
D.He was fighting at that time.
E. All of the above.

Q11. In one sentence describe what should happen to Nigeria Senate?
(50 marks)

No cheating please..

mr adamu is causing idamu to Nigeria student self....scrap all uni make everybody involve in trading then................tfu

Glo jor i dont complain of data any more i only complain of ba3....Glo u are d best

GO AND PREPARE FOR 2016/2017 POST UTME-{NIGERIAN UNIVERSITIES TELLS ASPIRANTS}
3RD JUNE FRIDAY 2016


The Nigerian universities has said that all those students who passed the just concluded 2016/2017 (UTME) exams and got up to 180 which is the cut off mark for all universities in Nigeria, should go and start preparing for the forth coming POST UTME exams which is coming up in 2 month times and not to feel relaxed despite the suggestion made by the ministry of education, because there is no how everybody that all the 5,000 students that applied for this year jamb will get into the university at once, it’s never possible for that to happen, because if it is like this virtually all the Nigerian polytechnics would be empty because no student in Nigeria would ever wish to go to polytechnics to study rather everyone would like to go to the university, so please if you are reading this article please go and start preparing for POST UTME exams before you realize it too late.
Now come to think of these universities in Nigeria which you all know that they are standard university in the country
*UNIVERSITY OF LAGOS
*UNIVERSITY OF BENIN
*UNIVERSITY OF ILLORIN
*UNIVERSITY OF IBADAN
*OBAFEMI AWOLOWO UNIVERSITY
*FEDERAL UNIVERSITY OF TECHNOLOGY OWERRI

How would they cope if there are no POST UTME exams to admit the students into the university, should they all allow these students to go in free without POST UTME? NO is the answer if not they will kill the standardization of the university and the school pride will go down, now in this case who are those that will be producing the first class that we normally produce every year? So please go and prepare for this year POST UTME exams or else mass failure of the exam would be recorded, also share this information to other students who would be also writing this exams.

I CAN'T STOP LAUGHING: which one is the funniest(i choose 11)..choose one 1)~When the person interviewing you at your new job is the same guy you insulted in traffic. Bro, u go apologise tire.! 2)When you abuse your friend "your mama!!!" and then u turn around to see his/her mum staring at you. oboi, u go collect plenty slap!.! 3)When Mosquito lands on your father's bald head and u try to kill it with your bare hands. You must provide d proof ohh, or else... 4) When you update"salary things" on Facebook and your landlord comments "on point""" U go travel go villa by force. 5)When you're in a bus and you throw away your #500 note instead of gala wrapper. Chai! E don do be dat! 6)When ur Dad works at NEPA and they take light and you shout "God punish NEPA"....... And he's there with u. Na ur mama go start to pay ur school fees. 7)When u dey on top okada and the okada man dey ping... # Lol. Na automatic ticket to Baba God be dat. When you finish eating in an eatery and u find out wallet fell out in a taxi... Start to prepare ur grammar. 9)When Usain Bolt chases u with a Cutlass... O boy, just stop beg am, cos ur own don finish. 10)~When u give beggar #500 note instead of #50. 11)When soldier punish u finish come release u make u dey go, u come climb ur bike come shout "officer thunder fire u" and ur bike no come gree start again. 12)When u dey inside bus, buy 1 gala and the seller run wit N950 change... 13)When you post on Facebook "My boss is an idiot" and ur boss like ur post. No just go work tomorrow.

Imagine!

A mad man at a Psychiatric hospital climbed a mango tree and spent almost the entire day on the tree.All of a sudden, he fall to the ground with full force.One of the Doctors rushed to the scene and asked him, ''Udeme what's the matter with you?"The mad man gladly replied with a smile...'I DON RIPE' !!

FLASH

The Minister Of Education, Mallam Adamu Adamu has said "No Post Utme". Not possible.
University of Ilorin, University of Lagos, Uniben, OAU and Co will give Post Utme to her candidates.

The Minister Of Education, Mallam Adamu Adamu has said "No Post Utme".

Sequel to the meeting held by Joint Admissions and Matriculation Board and the Minister of Education, Mallam Adamu Adamu in the combined national policy on admissions, The Minister of Education has said that no institution, both University, Polythecnic and Colleges will not go more than 180 this year.
He also expressed that some varsities can go beyond 180 in its jurisdictional management decision.

Based on the several investigations gathered, The Minister has proposed for the scrap of Post Utme which has not taken any effect yet. He also said that there is tendency for the scrap of Jamb too as from next year since the body experienced "teething" problems and technical hitches. The crux of the matter is that Jamb cannot be scrapped because it is a source of income to the government and Post Utme will equally stand too because it is a source of income to every institution.
Also, Universities like Unilorin, UI, OAU, Uniben and some neighbouring universities believed that students cannot be tested or examined alone by the body Jamb, that candidates must write their own examination before he or she can be regarded as a truly good student. The Minister only suggested and proposed. There is a level of misconstruction in the news given by the Press Men.

University of Ilorin, University of Lagos, Uniben, OAU and Co will give Post Utme to her candidates.

Team Plato has done several moves on the release of the post Utme of the University of Ilorin. Unilorin will conduct post Utme this year. We have confirmed this now and it is authentic. We use this medium to inform candidates and the general public that Unilorin and some other neighbouring federal varsities will hold the 2016 Post Utme screening exercise. Please, stay cool and calm.

The Federal Government Thursday scrapped the conduct of post Unified Tertiary Matriculation Examinations (UTME) for candidates seeking admission into higher institution.
The government explained that all tertiary institutions were at liberty to conduct screening for candidates seeking admission into any school.
Minister of Education, Mallam Adamu Adamu, said this on Thursday in Abuja after declaring open the 2016 Combined Policy Meeting on Admissions to Universities, Polytechnics and other higher institutions in Nigeria.
Adamu, expressed confidence in the examination conducted by the Joint Admissions and Matriculation Board (JAMB), adding that there was no need for other examination to be conducted by universities after JAMB.
He said: “As far as I am concerned the nation has confidence in what JAMB is doing. The universities should not be holding another examination and if the universities have any complain against JAMB let them bring it and then we address it.
“If JAMB is qualified enough to conduct tests and they have conducted test then there will be no need to conduct another test for students to gain admission.”
The Minister also asked the JAMB to stop extra charges on several categories of changes on admissions such as the change of course, change of school and others.
Meanwhile, the JAMB has pegged the cut – off mark for admission for 2016 at 180.
The 180 benchmark, applies to all universities and higher institutions in the country, including polytechnics, colleges of education, and others.
JAMB’s Registrar and Chief Executive Officer, Prof. Dibu Ojerinde, after a long debate with delegates from various institutions, told journalists that no institution would go below the 180 cut-off set by the board.
He said: “180 is given, no institution will go below 180 this year, And some universities can go above it, I know University of Ife will not go below 200 and University of Lagos will not go below 200 and also UI. All these ones stand but 180 as bench mark for others.
“This year we have more than enough candidates, we have over 1.5 million candidates so we will get enough candidates to take in all the schools if they are serious. Re-distribution is already ongoing, because it is embedded in the registration procedure.”

# ABACHA........ ..After Babangida Another Criminal Has Arrived ...........hum

Ladies now are day clam they believe in love!,let see ya comment

Abbreviation you need to know
#APC = Accepting Past Criminals.
#PDP = People Deceiving People.
#IMO = Idiot Must Obey.
#IBADAN = Ibo Boys Are Dangerous At Night.
#ABA = Agege Boys Association.
#LAGOS = Love All Girls On Sunday.
#ABACHA = After Babangida Another Criminal Has Arrived.
#GULDER = Girls Under Liquor Deserve Extra Romance.
#FANTA = Foolish Ashawo Never Takes Advice.
#WEEK = Women Education Ends in Kitchen.
#NIGERIA = Never Investigate Great Executive Robbers In Authority.
#NEPA =Never Expect Power Always.
#KOBO = Kill Obasanjo Before Others.
#AIDS = America Invention for Discouraging Sex.
#PHCN = Problem Has Change Name
#OYO = On Your Own.
#NYSC = Now Your Struggle Continue.
#GLO = Get Lover Online.
#MTN = Maintain Total Nonsense.
#GSM = General Street Madness.......... Share your own idea and let's see what you have in mind.....

Nigerians they must complain sha!

There are a few things that can be done in times of grave emergencies. . Your mobile phone can actually be a life saver or an emergency tool for survival. Check out the things that you can do with it:
FIRST: Emergency
The Emergency Number worldwide for Mobile is 112.
If you find yourself out of the coverage area of your mobile; network and there is an emergency,
dial 112 and the mobile will search any existing network to establish the emergency number for you, and interestingly this number 112 can be dialled even if the keypad is locked. Try it out...
SECOND: Have you locked your keys in the car?
Does your car have remote keyless entry? This may come in handy someday.
Good reason to own a cell phone: If you lock your keys in the car and the spare keys are at home, call someone at home on their mobile phone from your cell phone.
Hold your cell phone about a foot from your car door and have the person at your home press the unlock button, holding it near the mobile phone on their end. Your car will unlock.

Saves someone from having to drive your keys to you.

Distance is no object. You could be hundreds of miles away, and if you can reach someone who has the other ' remote ' for your car, you can unlock the doors (or the trunk)...

Editor ' s Note: It works fine! We tried it out and it unlocked our car over a mobile phone! '

THIRD: Hidden Battery Power
Imagine your mobile battery is very low. To activate, press the keys *3370#
Your mobile will restart with this reserve and the instrument will show a 50% increase in battery.
This reserve will get charged when you charge your mobile next time.

FOURTH: How to disable a STOLEN mobile phone?
To check your Mobile phone ' s serial number, key in the following digits on your phone: * # 0 6 #
A 15 digit code will appear on the screen. This number is unique to your handset..
Write it down and keep it somewhere safe. When your phone get stolen, you can phone your service provider and give them this code. They will then be able to block your handset so even if the thief changes the SIM card, your phone will be totally useless.

You probably won ' t get your phone back, but at least you know that whoever stole it can ' t use/sell it either. If everybody does this, there would be no point in people stealing mobile phones.

FIFTH : ATM - PIN Number Reversal - Good to Know
If you should ever be forced by a robber to withdraw money from an ATM machine, you can
notify the police by entering your PIN # in reverse. For example, if your pin number is 1234,
then you would put in 4321.

The ATM system recognizes that your PIN number is backwards from the ATM card you placed in the machine. The machine will still give you the money you requested, but unknown to the robber, the police will be immediately dispatched to the location.

This information was recently broadcast on CTV by Crime Stoppers however it is seldom used because people just don ' t know about it...... Please pass this along to everyone.

This is the kind of information people don ' t mind receiving, so pass it on to your family and friends.

Husband and Wife agreed that whenever they want to have SEX, they will call it 'PHONE CALL' so that the children won't understand. One day, Dad sends Son to tell Mum that he wants to make a 'PHONE CALL'. Mum replies: tel your Dad that the Network is busy today. Dad replies: tell your Mum that d call is urgent, if Network is busy, then am going to a PUBLIC PHONE BOOTH. Mum replies: tell him that if he dare goes to Public Phone Booth, I will OPEN a Business Center and all 'PHONE CALLS' will be FREE ... . . Don't Laugh Alone...

I trust ma guy!

My good people,ha kindly vote for ma padi,she really needs your help,she must win oooooo,I trust u,I knw u go vote for her thanks @titilayooladimeji shared @9jacampusstyle's post with you. See it at https://www.instagram.com/p/BF4rTNimx8A/?r=2953336093

She needs help

Oh! That woman na boko haram member,how I wish I have a gun,I swear I will shoot her,so wicked,heartless na wa o, God y do u create this woman?

Plz add +234 706 908 9254 nirex

When I first heard the word PSYCHOLOGY in secondary school, I spelt it "Sychology". I didn't know there was a silent' letter "P" before it as in (Psychology). When Buhari promised Nigerians ₦45 per litre of fuel during his campaign, I didn't also know there was a silent "1" before it as in (₦145).
We learn every day, don't we?

My android phone don chop my money tire, na him I come vex yesterday sell am, come take some money buy Chinaphone! The phone get TV, Touch screen, Nail cutter, Fire lighter etc. I fit write Text message with toothpicks sef. But now am in bigger trouble!!! 1. E go full after 3 minutes of charging. 2. The spellings get mistakes e.g NokLa, blackderry, i-pon, samswag etc. 3. When aeroplane pass, e go record "One missed Call". 4. When a big car horn; e go show "Charger connected" 5. When Chinese man pass, e go show: "One Bluetooth device found" 6. When fine guy waka pass, e go show "WiFi On" 7. When ugly guy waka pass, e go show, "Virus detected" Abeg ooo! I wan sell am! Who wan buy ooo? Even as I dey find buyer, e dey show me for screen say "No contacts found" Pls don't laugh alone, send to those you wish to put a smile on their face. Lol Morning all

Thank God for him,am happy for him ooh

Some stupid people sha want to make fame by all means.......that africa for you#naija for life