₦airaland Forum

Nightie:
Lol. Interesting

Sure, read to the end and be swept off your feet.

discoprophet:
Nah.. I don't dig those ones. They make me wanna get touchy..

Me ayam a gentleman na.. I have to act like one. I kannor coman be engaging in that kind of unscrupulous activity here and there..

Your oyibo dey sweet me. As you dey read my tory, try dey notify me as you sight grammatical errors. I wan learn English more

5: My Indomie


"We start right away, we got no time. Thank God lectures have not really commenced", he said.
"For today, I'd need you to read and digest 'Mills and boon', don't worry I know where to get a copy for you, just go to the hostel and prepare two satchets of indomie for me while I go get the book", he instructed.
Thunderstruck, I kept staring and nodding affirmatively; after all, what were two satchets of indomie compared to the invaluable knowledge I was about to acquire.

Two hours later, Chris was snoring while lying on my mattress like a corpse; having voraciously consumed the plate of indomie I prepared him. I had diligently gone through the 'Mills and Boons' he brought with him two times and was about going the third time when he rolled a bit in his sleep.

4: The code

[b] A year elapsed. I was a bigger boy now in 200L; more prominent among my folks and most importantly, my CGPA was "heavy" - a few points away from first class.
This indicated that I have not deviated from daddy's instructions and as far as I was concerned, it was time to approach my love whom I had learnt that her name was Maryam.

I was outrightly clueless how to go about my love mission and obviously needed 'coaching'; and to God be the glory, the best coach was Chris, one of my best friends.
Chris was passionate about helping me out.
"I knew you had a thing for that girl, I've been watching you since 100Level" he said, when I offered him the coaching job.
I smiled and pat him on him on the head. "You too look matter weh no concern you"
" No wahala, you know you're my guy and when it comes to wooing ladies, I am an ace"
"I shall coach you well and reveal the 'code' to you", he added.
"Wow! Thanks man, so when are we starting?"
....... [/b]

SANDOSKI:
Lol........

Haa, you go laugh tire na

3: The Decision

"Am I already going against daddy's advice and wishes for my educational career? Am I abandoning the first class path already?" I asked myself, as I walked to the hostel.
"..or are the witches from my village at work already in my life?" I though again.

"But I didn't do anything wrong; I was just admiring Gods handiwork, maybe its too early. Make I just wait get good Cgpa this 100Level and nothing go stop me from to friend that girl for 200Level" I soliloquized and finally concluded.

I decided to face my studies squarely and ignore all forms of distractions; in short, cooking more than once a day was considered a distraction too. So I judiciously planned my life into a "square"- church , night class and Lecture.

2: The Mad lecturer

[b]"Its the 27th" she replied with a sharp gaze, obviously wondering what prompted such question at that point in time; and before I could say any other thing, we were at the entrance of the lecture theater already, I heaved a sigh of relief.

I was unable to
concentrate throughout the lecture; I kept taking quick glances at her pretty face while nodding to the "balderdash" the lecturer was spewing, as far as I was concerned at this point he was only blathering.
Unbeknownst to me, the lecturer had been observing me, he called out my name: "Hey Capableben, Stand up and tell me the last statement I made about waves!"

The class suddenly hushed down, as a graveyard and all eyes were on me. I slowly stood up; obviously clueless, I kept standing without uttering any word.
"Young man, we don't have all day, tell me the last statement I made about waves"
" I didn't particularly hear you the first time sir, say it again" , the whole class burst out laughing before I could finish talking, and what irked me most was that my Newly found crush laughed too.
"Leave my class, you bumbling idiot, leave my class now!" The lecturer ordered, and I packed my books and slowly walked out of the class, realising how foolish my answer was.[/b]

olatunjithomas:
lol

Haa, you mean am? This one na just the beginning o

donbenedict:
u mean am

I mean am ooo, grab your popcorn.. you go laugh tire....

I shall be updating periodically. Kindly drop ya comments to make me feel I have an audience who wanna hear my fascinating first wooing experience. thank you

The Genesis

[b] In my previous post, I said something about being single and "never ever" searching. Yes, that decision didn't just come from nowhere, theres a good reason for it as there's no smoke without fire.

It all started in my first year in the university.It was fun and exciting making new acquaintances and friends here and there, from your coursemates to your faculty mates. I wasn't left out, as I made two good friends who were also my course mates -Joshua and Chris.

About four Weeks into lectures,on a particular Monday morning while I was rushing down to a lecture theater, I found myself walking side by side with a pretty and strange lady who seemed to be moving towards my direction.
I kept mum, and focused on where I was going, having in mind that I had barely 10mins to be in class.
We kept walking with a uniform speed and direction as though we were friends,and quiet until she finally broke the silence.
"You walking to LT3?" She asked
"Yessss" I replied, abruptly as though I were waiting for her to ask.
An innate voice within me spoke: "Capableben, ask her name and possibly her phone number"
I thought it was a good idea too,so I began to summon the courage to ask and the right words to use in my mind. After the short rehearsal in my head, I opened my mouth: "ehhm, so, what is....what is today's date? " I asked, with no iota of idea how I deviated to that. [/b]

Good morning Doctors in the house;
There's this guy that has been experiencing seizures for a while now, close to two years.
what confuses us is that these seizures attack him only at night, never happens during the day and we don't know what caused it as there is not history of epilepsy in the family.
When the thing is happening, he shakes and bites his tongue and makes one scary sound like that.

could this be epilepsy?
what should we do?
anybody witnessed a situation like this before?

The Genesis II[sub][/sub]
In my previous post, I said something about being single and "never ever" searching. Yes, that decision didn't just come from nowhere, theres a good reason for it as there's no smoke without fire; and ofcourse it wasnt because i was too ugly to search or be sought after.

It all started in my first year in the university.It was fun and exciting making new acquaintances and friends here and there, from your coursemates to your faculty mates. I wasn't left out, as I made two good friends who were also my course mates -Joshua and Chris.

About four Weeks into lectures,on a particular Monday morning while I was rushing down to a lecture theater, I found myself walking side by side with a pretty and strange lady who seemed to be moving towards my direction.
I kept mum, and focused on where I was going, having in mind that I had barely 10mins to be in class. We kept walking with a uniform speed and direction as though we were friends,and quiet until she eventually broke the silence.
"You walking to LT3?" She asked
"Yessss" I replied, abruptly as though I were waiting for her to ask.
An innate voice within me spoke: "Master, ask her name and possibly her phone number"
I thought it was a good idea too,so I began to summon the courage to ask and the right words to use in my mind. After the short rehearsal in my head, I opened my mouth: "ehhm, so, what is....what is today's date? " I asked, with no iota of idea how I deviated to that.

"Its the 27th" she replied with a sharp gaze, obviously wondering what prompted such question at that point in time; and before I could say any other thing, we were at the entrance of the lecture theater already, I heaved a sigh of relief.

I was unable to concentrate throughout the lecture; I kept taking quick glances at her pretty face while nodding to the "balderdash" the lecturer was spewing, as far as I was concerned at this point he was only blathering and to me, she was a cynosure.

Unbeknownst to me, the lecturer had been observing me, he called out my name: "Master, Stand up and tell me the last statement I made about waves!"

The class suddenly hushed down, as a graveyard and all eyes were on me. I slowly stood up; obviously clueless, and kept standing without uttering any word.
"Young man, we don't have all day, tell me the last statement I made about waves"
" I didn't particularly hear you the first time sir, say it again" , the whole class burst out laughing before I could finish talking, and what irked me most was that my Newly found crush laughed too.

"Leave my class, you bumbling idiot, leave my class now!" The lecturer ordered, and I packed my books and slowly walked out of the class, realising how foolish my answer was.

"Am I already going against daddy's advice and wishes for my educational career? Am I abandoning the first class path already?" I asked myself, as I walked to the hostel.
"..or are the witches from my village at work already in my life?" I though again.

"But I didn't do anything wrong; I was just admiring Gods handiwork, maybe its too early. Make I just wait get good Cgpa this 100Level and nothing go stop me from to friend that girl for 200Level" I soliloquized and finally concluded.

.........."the Genesis III"drops in a jiffy at www.bennytalktown..com

mokoshalb:
:
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pls check out mine na.
www.bennytalktown..com

mosesabah:
please feel free to drop your questions and i would relied back as i see your comments

How do i Include comment section in my blog and also the place that will enable my guests signu up and be able to drop comments??

DickDastardly:
Where is Le Chattellier's Principle .
My favourite ....... applicable in every facet of life!

Proud and fulfilled Chemical Engineer .......

Be one of my mentors pls

DickDastardly:
Where is Le Chattellier's Principle .
My favourite ....... applicable in every facet of life!

Proud and fulfilled Chemical Engineer .......

Be one of my mentors pls

did u say any?..of course there re

What are they

Ranchhoddas:
Do you have any evidence to the contrary?

No

Ranchhoddas:
Your environment...not objective!

So you really think life ends after death?
Like, the story ends there?

nnamdiosu:
hmmmm...what can i say? Nairaland is the combination of a credible news and information provided.
1. Last month when a trailer fell in CMS and blocked the road, my boss and i were just almost at constain when i just decided to do more morning rountine of entering NL. At once i saw the news on FP. Immediately i told him, we had to use an alternative source, (via yaba to the island). From a distance we saw the lonng traffic. I felt like a super hero who had just rescued lagos from a nuclear holocaust.

2. I cant count how many web design jobs i have gotten via nairaland. Initally, the clients didnt want to trust me, (cos i insist on half payment before commencement of job) but along the line they did. (But i no go pay tax give seun. lie lie) . abeg na joke i dey o. i go pay soon

3. my phone gallery is filled to the brim with funny pictures gotten from the jokes section. When friends glance through my phone they always feel like stealing my memory card . when im sad or bored, i go through them. God will add laughter to all contributors (and downloaders of the jokes section quiz)

4. My IQ has increased. apart from normal news, NL has thought me so mannnnnyyyyy topics or subject matter i never could have aquired on my own. e.g thanks to tosyne...10 reasons to mess everyday, etc i now possess a walking enclycopedia encyclopedia in my brain.

5. im entertained with lies almost making me a liar (God forbid) funny posts like.... my wife bought me an island, help. i caught my BB and android phone beating up my iphone, help. (i always wondered why family section comments always ends or begins with HELP?


SEE....I CAN GO ON AND ON. GOD BLESS THE FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NAIRALAND AND ITS DICTATOR SORRY MISTAKE, PRESIDENT, HIS EXCELLENCY SEUN OSEWA GSS, GPRS, GPS, PDP, JP OF THE NATION, E.T.C
* hurries off to create another moniker in case i'm banned*

what is the first step in Learning Webdesign?

rosalieene:
It has only ended up teaching me how to insult people since some of them here are very insultive.

Pretty people insult too?

ladycomfort:
Have learnt a lot on NL. It has really helped me morally , educationally and other aspect of my life. Have met the good, the bad and the ugly.

Your signature, hope you didn't learn that here too?





Meanwhile, you can listen to my track here.
http://tindeck.com/dl/xmmko

holuphisayor:
Used to be addicted to nairaland but no more, found a new forum.

What forum could that be? It can't be better than NL. is it?



Meanwhile, you can listen to my track here.

http://tindeck.com/dl/xmmko

Meanwhile I'm searching out for my Nairaland wife, my missing rib, if you are that rib, and you know yourself, Tell me now.

simdam500:
Guest abi?

And op, really? how much are you paid cos i‘m in too, if seun need someone to sugarcoat nl

Mehn, no one paid me for this. I'm only being appreciative to a forum I have personally gained a lot from. Who is seun?




Meanwhile, you can listen to my track here.

http://tindeck.com/dl/xmmko

bcardastro:
let me say one truth,the absence of e-wars has really made nl boring to me,I miss the days when you get afraid to open a thread coz them go turn am for ur head,the days of introvert, the days when you see grammatical bombs and you have no choice but to use a dictionary....I'm afraid if the mods don't rewind back nl might lose it!!!

Seriously, those e-wars are integral part of this forum. They keep me laughing all day.

repogirl:
I'm on a break, not sure when I will continue.

Okay, I wanna write like you when I grow up.

Ranchhoddas:
do you have objective proof of this?

Many posts here make my heart wanna deviate from this reality but even in my environment it is evident there is a God. I mean, some events are just beyond the physical.