₦airaland Forum

jcmaiah:
I suspect this is a cooked up story! I doubt if an American who is educated like the OP claims would right "report" instead of "rapport"

That's messed up lol, my degree is in mechanical engineering, and everybody knows engineers can't spell

raumdeuter:
Most fathers are cautious of young men and their daughters

How old is the girl and how old are you?

if both of you are matured and you look responsible enough to get married he would turn around

How many fathers immediately warm up to their son in law? It takes time

I am 25, she is 24. You have a point, I didn't expect him to warm up to me immediately, but I also didn't expect the "cold shoulder" I have been getting.

Stillfire:
Nigerian fathers are only interested in knowing about your intentions to marry their daughters, and not about you 'dating' their daughters.
No, he won't hold you to high esteem, until your intention to marry his daughter is clear.
I'm sure he's pissed you had the guts to come to his house without marriage on the agenda, lol.

Hmm, I never really thought about it that way...In the Afro-American culture, meeting the parents of the person you are dating is considered normal, just as long as it's a serious relationship and not a fling. I have every intention of marrying this woman, but I also see no reason to rush into such a large, and life altering decision. I wonder if it would be best to avoid visiting her at her house until I'm prepared to make a proposal.

Thank you all for the suggestions. Yeah, I sort of got the impression that confronting him would not be a wise option. I think I'll try the gift idea, and see how he responds.

My girlfriend and I started dating 8 months ago, and I only recently met her father 2 weeks ago because he had been in Nigeria on business. Her mom loves me and we get along very well, and she even taught me how to make gbegiri and ewedu soup, but her father seems very cold and dismissive toward me, and he barely even acknowledges my presence when I greet him. My girlfriend told me that he doesn't have a good history with black Americans, because some of them robbed his convenience store many years ago. What can I do to make him see that I'm not a bad guy? I have a degree, a good job, and I come from a good family, so I don't see what the big deal is. I just don't think it's right to come into a man's house, knowing I'm dating his daughter, and not have any sort of report with him.

Please, if you guys have any suggestions on how to deal with this situation, I would appreciate you sharing your thoughts.