Gofwane:
Too much of unnecessary explanations and suspense to make the story longer. Anyway, nice work. E no easy to write story.

Meanwhile, here is my own experience....

I've always watched how my cousin brother slaughters chicken and i came to believe it was an easy task.

So it happened on that Christmas day that my brother wasn't around, so me being an extra ordinary stubborn boy quickly volunteered to slaughter the chicken. My grandmother was not all that convinced that i am up to the task, but i assured her that i can even slaughter a goat or ram sef
I even went ahead to lie that me and Victor once slaughtered a cow for his father whose sells meat at kwata

And so i was given the green light! Like all these American soldiers invading Iraq, i went to the cage and picked out the Osama-bin-FatAgricChicken and headed for the backyard.

I layed the chicken down and dug a small hole for the blood to pour into. I remembered being told that if you want to slaughter an animal, you must do the sign of the cross or else a snake will come out from the animal and bite you. I quickly did the sign.

Some of my home boys were there waiting for me to finish so that we can go out for morning session of our shayo. I grabbed the chicken hands, joined them together and held them with one hand. But that position was not comfortable for me because i will have to use one hand to hold the neck and the other to hold the knife, so i decided to use my legs to match the wings.

I was putting on my timberland boots as i was about to go out before i got the contract of slaughtering the chicken. As i match the hands with my left leg i just heard kraakkk! I used my right leg to match the chicken legs, i still heard kraakkk! Oboyyeh, i don break the chicken feet and wings oh all this agric chicken sef no strong at all but no worries, shebi dey will still have to break the wings when they are peeling off the feathers. I don even save them too much wahala.

Naso i put knife for the neck and started pulling it up and down. Half through, i realised the knife was not sharp enough so i turned to sharpen it on the wall, the chicken started vibrating and that scared me so jump away from the chicken. Oboyy, na so chicken pick race with broken wings and feet with the head half cut and falling backwards on the shoulder . The chicken was limping and running aimlessly without eyes to see where it was going

Everyone there burst out with laughter! I was embarrassed and confused, so i chased the chicken but the thing was just dribbling me and i was still scared to grab the chicken so i used my timberland boots and kicked the chicken up like say na John Terry i be.

Unfortunately, my granny rushed outside to see what was going on and she saw when i kicked the chicken. By the time the chicken landed beside our well, it was dead already.
My grandmother asked me to throw away the chicken but my hommies quickly carried it to go do barbecue.
The kind quarrel i collect that day almost made me commit suicide.