₦airaland Forum

Before I left the shores of Nigeria many years ago, I used to work at a private hospital around Ikeja as a healthcare personnel. Despite being good looking and all, I would not deny that I had not had a fair share of heartbreaks and opposite gender reality experiences which many of our youths still face today. These realities, of a truth, can numb the hell out of any emotions you think you may probably have towards females as guy. Is it the lies, the deceit, the constant billings, the stand ups?... Lol. Story for another day. However, as a sharp guy who saw everything life brought as a means of growth, I always kept an open mind.

My open mindedness solidified a 100 folds when a couple walked into our clinic one rainy evening. The man, who was the patient, was 80 years old and suffering late stages of cancer. The wife, if I can recall, was around 75 years old. From the looks, the wife appeared tired and soaked due to the rain. However, throughout my brief encounter with them, she continued giving beams of smiles and kept reassuring her husband who kept rolling in pains that everything was going to be alright.

The husband was later admitted and for the next couple of days he was there, the wife never left his side. Despite her age, she kept going back and forth to get him homemade food. She kept him entertained by reading him the bible and praying for him. She never for one day felt irritated when the husband had involuntary loose bowels. She even helped clean him up and always gave him hugs. She did so much that I am not able to write them all.

One day, I curiously asked her why she held on so strong even when the lights were fading away slowly for her husband. She smiled and said that what she was doing was nothing compared to what her husband did for her. They have been married for over 50 years. Her husband personally kept them afloat when they had nothing decades back. And when she had problems conceiving, he was her defense and strength against family and external attacks until she was later able to have 3 boys who all lived abroad and were the ones supporting his hospital care at that time. She said her husband never for one day lost faith in her nor judged her for some poor decisions she took. He was stern and firm in love. He was, like she put it, her torch light in the dark. She ended her story by saying: Why would I turn my back on this angel in human form now that he needs me the most?. I was shattered. I didn't know when a tear trickled down my cheek.

3 weeks after the husband was admitted, he succumbed to his pains and died. For almost 2 hours after he was pronounced dead, the wife kept singing praises and praying by his now cold body. All she said after she was done was: I will see you again my love.

This singular experience shaped my heart. I stopped asking for a girlfriend and started praying for a wife. I started praying for the future unseen and things I could not change.

And that's why whenever I read posts here on Nairaland and see the pride people take in talking down about finding a significant other, I feel nothing but sympathy. They talk about how being single is the best thing that has ever happened to them. How they live freely without answering to anyone. How they freely sleep with this one and onto the next. I know it may not be easy to find partners who qualify as the couple in my post. Things have really changed, but people forget:

You will never stay young!
A time will come your strength will fail you.
People will look at you weird just for being old.
You might look around and see friends, acquaintances or colleagues who took life serious moving way happier and stronger.
Nobody may be there to help your frail body off the bed or the toilet seat.

No matter how bad the society gets, girls and guys who carry the personality of God shall always abide. If you don't ask God, you may never find them.

Stop looking for fun, start seeking for establishments.

No one knows how their story will ever end.

To be honest, watching Liverpool play does not give joy anymore. There’s no creative thinking. It’s the usual back to front, side by side kind of game. There’s no running in behind dazzling play like before when Mane, Firmino and Salah ruled the front. Right now, it’s just plain boring.

Why is Slot not opting to play the same players who won against Frankfurt? It’s obvious Salah is no longer as creative as before and Kerkez has no clue where the ball is.

Praxis758:
Here in the US, we’ve not seen anything of such.

The guys working in the Atlanta office of our consulate are Siamese brothers of the North Korean leader.

Minister Tunji Ojo should stop all these media dressing and propaganda.

Nawa o.
This is not funny o

Hello Nairalanders,

There was a news reported some months ago about the Nigerian immigration office launching an e-passport portal where Nigerians in diaspora can apply for passport renewals without visiting the embassy. It was supposed to be started off first in Canada later this year and then to the U.S and across Europe.

Has this actually commenced in Canada or is this all a hoax?

Can this be pushed to front page please so we can get people to comment and share their experiences. Tx

I used to have the same issue quite a lot years ago.

My solution back then was to scrub the tiny bumps hard with a tough sponge until I start feeling pain a bit, then I dry the area with a clean towel and gently apply methylated spirit to the area. Quite painful but very effective!

When I noticed that it could be the clipper that could be causing the problem, I had have my barber stop carving or lining the back of my head line and that was how I have never had such issue for the past 10 years.

I have come to realise from close observation that most Nigerian women exit social media especially Facebook or change their social media handles as soon as they tie the knot.

Some people would say that this happens at the command of their husbands as a way to prevent reconnection with ex-boyfriends or as a way to avoid their wives meeting men secretly via social media. In as much as I find these two reasons making a bit sense, I still feel it doesn’t entirely make sense. I personally think keeping an old Facebook or social media account active does some good as this could make old friends reconnect and even help each other. I strongly feel that men who subject their wives to this sort of act do not trust their wives completely. However, with the stories circulating the internet concerning many African women and infidelity, I wouldn’t blame them tho. This submission is based on my story below.

I had this wonderful lady as a very close friend back then in University years ago. I was a class ahead of her but I couldn’t ask her out because she already had a guy she was dating back then but we were sure close. I would never go for my guy’s girl behind his back. She visits me, I do same. She knows my girlfriend, I knew her boyfriend. Our friendship was the most matured friendship ever!
During my final year, things were kind of rough a bit. She was always there for me. She always cooked and brought it to me. She always came with her boyfriend to check up on me. I won’t forget how she sacrificed her laptop for me to use and complete my final year project which I held onto for weeks and she never complained about it. Long Story short, this girl was super nice to me. I can’t really express enough of how much this lady helped me back then.

I made her a promise after I graduated that when Baba God pick my call, I would definitely show my appreciation for all she did for me. We laughed about it but God knows I was dead serious. After two years we kept communicating via Facebook and phone calls. I got to find out she already broke up with the boyfriend I knew she had. Unfortunately, I wasn’t prepared to go into a relationship with her as I was still hustling and was already planning to relocate to the U.S and didn’t wish to leave her hanging while away.

After I left Nigeria, we lost contact both online and offline. However, 1 year later, I got to see a timeline post on Facebook from her friend I knew wishing her a happy married life, to which she never responded to. I reached out to her via her Facebook Account but since 4 years now, she never read nor replied my chat. I got a wind from a friend that she deactivated her old facebook account at the command of her husband and had gone private since then.

I do remember her once in a while and still remember the promise I made to her. I have even told my wife about her as well. I have personally kept around $5000 to present to her whenever I see her but only God knows when that will ever happen as she is nowhere to be found online anymore. Many people who knew her then don’t even have her contact as she also changed her phone number.

Although this lady doesn’t take any centre stage in my life as I have long moved past that, however, I am bringing this story here as many of my guys I have told this story have had numerous similar experiences with their Nigerian female friends both past and present.

Well, whatever the reasons many of our ladies do this, I do not know but I totally respect it. Lol

What exactly is problem of most Yorubas?

What exactly is wrong with putting on an Igbo attire?

How many times have Igbo politicians worn the Agbada and nobody made a fuss about it?

This issue of tribalism in Nigeria looks like it is never going to go away.

With over 6 years of being married, I don’t miss those days of dating to find a wife. It’s full of its ups and many downs.

Lol

This doesn’t change anything. The backlash will come and go and the politicians willl carry on from where they stopped.

Nigerians and online backlash na 5&6 while Nigerians and immediate action is like 1 & 100.

Omo. If I meet this kine woman for pitch, I no go think twice to man tackle am o. This ones fit give you ACL injury on top ‘women are weak vessels’.

To think of the fact that our country has borders makes it more thrilling to wonder how these people come across the borders to kill, steal and operate freely without any consequences. Amazing!