₦airaland Forum

nkiliuzo:
leading 41-29... am thinking probably in the 3rd quarter, the boys will start dropping 3's anyhow like they did against USA

TruthHurts1:
Once upon a time, old man FORWARDEVERLY and his sweet sixteen wife number 7 were expecting the birth of their first child after 20 years of marriage.

However Mrs FORWARDEVERLY was experiencing severe pains and the doctor was worried about the chances of her successful delivery so he spoke to old man FORWARDEVERLY:

Doctor: Sir, your wife's condition is serious and the only way it can be stabilized is if you agree that we should transfer some of her pain to you as the father of the child. Will you accept this solution?

Old man FORWARDEVERLY: Yes, I will do anything to minimize my wife's pain

So the doctor warns Old man FORWARDEVERLY that the process will be painful for him, but Old man FORWARDEVERLY reassures the doctor that he is a strong man and he can endure the pain.

So the doctor transfers 10% of pain to Old man FORWARDEVERLY, then asks him: "How are you feeling?"

Old man FORWARDEVERLY replies: "I don't feel any pain whatsoever"

The doctor was pleased and said: "Since you can carry 10% pain, let us try and increase it to 25%"

Surprisingly, Old man FORWARDEVERLY was able to endure the 25% pain and the doctor was impressed.

"Wow, very few men can take 25% pain as calmly as you are doing right now. You are really a strong man."

Old man FORWARDEVERLY smiled with pride. The doctor now asked him: "Would you mind if we increase the pain level to 50%?" and he answered: "No problem"

So the doctor increased the pain transfer to 50%, but still Old man FORWARDEVERLY was cool and calm and he wasn't feeling it.

By this time, the doctor was excited! "Nobody has been able to endure 50% pain without fainting! You are a real superman!"

The proud FORWARDEVERLY now became boastful: "Even 100% is nothing for me!"

The doctor tried to beg him to change his mind, that nobody has ever survived 100%, but the ignorant FORWARDEVERLY insisted on 100% and even said he will beat up the doctor if he refused. So the doctor reluctantly and nervously increased the pain level to 100% and quietly told the nurses to prepare a death certificate.

However a miracle happened because not only was FORWARDEVERLY still alive, he was actually chilling with a tumbler of kaikai!

The doctor and all the hospital staff were screaming with excitement and giving praises to God.

"Mr," said the doctor to FORWARDEVERLY, "what you have done today is nothing short of a miracle. No man in history has ever survived 100% pain transfer because it is an automatic death sentence! Your new born son is very fortunate to have a father like you!"

The following morning, a proud Old man FORWARDEVERLY and his wife went home after the delivery of their bouncing baby boy.

Upon driving home, they noticed that no matter how many times they horned, their gateman, Abdul, would not come to open the gate. Eventually, their anger over Abdul's behaviour changed to worry, so they summoned a few neighbors and broke down the gate, only to find Abdul lying stone dead on the ground....

Bifwoli:
Giorgio Chielinni has a Phd (Pull Him Down) and a Masters from the University of Rome in the art of treachery.

BascoVanVeli:
I would rather have Alana Jonathan.

Adakintroy:
Na wah for England.

Una no go win anything for this life self.

ikllbrokehoes:
Which one be fairly used chicken again? lol

donate:
bet9ja guy....may u watch urself get kill by sars amen! may u die b4 ur parents amen!

Daveambition:
I've read ur post more than 4times & still don't understand ya point..
Is it that you're mahd ni...??

PDPGuy:
It’s game day!

PDPGuy:
It’s game day!

phorget:
Similar incident happened to me at Onitcha some years back, if I had a gun I would have killed somebody that day. That singular act made me to hate the igbos till date.

Skyfornia:
Had an encounter once on my way to ojota, I gave this conductor N500 expecting N300 change, half way through the journey, this conductor is requesting for another money claiming I didn't give him money, and the lady who seated beside me whom would have confirmed my payment has already alighted from the bus.

I was boiling inside me with fiery rage while the conductor was putting up drama..as soon as I got to my bus stop, the conductor started shouting to the driver not to stop until I pay, but fortunately, another passenger was also stopping at the same bus stop so they had to stop, as I was struggling to come down, even ready to forfeit my N300 balance, the conductor dragged me, with the rage in me, I gave him an unexpected punch that blinded his vision at that moment...if you see the way the guy weak eh...even me shock. ;

All his gra gra just mellow down... finally they let me go.

CandyOps:
RIP young blood. I remember one December like that a hit and run driver knocked down a young girl who was trekking in front of me into the gutter. I narrowly missed being hit too.

The car slowed down and I heard the guy in the passenger side beacon on the driver to speed off. It's a traumatic experience.

The Nigerian Government should be sued for almost all lives lost in a car accident in Nigeria.

Them suppose build roads make am pothole-free but won't. Them suppose install CCTV all over the country for surveillance and traffic checks yet they won't. Even after it has been commissioned during OBJs tenure.

Them suppose put street lights for the whole roads but they won't. RIP young man

Watch and you go soon see some stupid fellas go begin rain curses on the driver knowing fully well that curses don't do shit or worse begin to call on gods to come to their rescue when they have brains and hands to put to work with.

Pray if you must but put in work always towards your freedom from this oppression we experience in this contraption called Nigeria. If u like bind & cast untimely death all you want in the name of any God you hold reverence to.. las las nothing go happen.

So far as we don't put in work to better our lives our situation and problems go dey wait for us reach next tomorrow.

hbemigho:
You don't believe? Oya look at my profile and guess my age.

Sunkyapogee:
Them no born you well to lay hands on my head or ask me to knee down for you to pray for me.. If you want pray for me as a pastor we hold hands together you pray not knee down while you standing up..

Vickyvice:
Idiot. You kill another person papa abi!

kenzysmith:
Ukraine na walkover

saintkel:
The FG should have a rethink of it's activities for now....Fulani herdsmen cannot and will not take over Nigeria no matter how bad they want it

WibusJaga:
I see England losing in the Final against Italy.

Tranquillity360:
DSS written scripts.




Someone should remind me how many AK 47 found in Igboho's home.

APOSTLECHUMA:
BUHARI IS NOT UP TO PHARAOH'S FINGER YET GOD DELIVERS ISRAELITES FROM HIS BONDAGE, AFTER SPEAKING TO PHARAOH IN THE ONLY LANGUAGE HE UNDERSTOOD. ONE DAY, GOD WILL HEAR THE CRY OF ALL THOSE YEANING FOR FREEDOM IN THIS GOOD FOR NOTHING COUNTRY AND GRANT US FREEDOM.

AchalugoNwa:
Mynd44 Lalasticlala Seun.
Rule 2

Antoeni:
Soldiers came to our compound yesterday to pack my neighbour’s properties in a big truck. They handcuffed my neighbor and started beating him mercilessly. No one could move near them or say a word. After they finished packing all his properties, they bundled my neighbor inside the truck and drove off. Even my landlady that he owed three years rent was dumbfounded. Luckily for my neighbor, His wife and kids were at his mum’s place. I just saw my neighbor’s close friend this morning and he said i shouldn’t tell anybody that my neighbor wanted to pack out without paying the rent owed, So he planned with a soldier friend of his to help him pack his load . Country hard

robosky02:
All the fault should go to amaju picmilk

Kondomatic:
When earning vs when spending.

Earning: N1000 + N10 = N1010
Spending: N1000 - N10 = N72

Each time I come back from the market these days I will have to sit down and calculate everything I bought over and over again just to be sure pickpockets didn't steal my money.

JeffreyJunior:
Snakes bite in self defense so if not threatened, a snake can cohabitate with you for as long as it needs to.

This ain't no miracle sir.

Harddiskng:
This guy’s injury are too severe to be afflicted in self defense as the babe claimed.

Same self-defense and there is not a single mark on the girl’s body? When he is bigger than her, how naa?

fati2001:
sometimes I wonder what humans want in life..

flee from evil deeds [no way ] they wouldn't listen.. but after the deed,they will blame the innocent Lucifer.

laughitall:
I want to help 5 nairalanders with 2k each .. drop your account number below this comment