@OP,be warned;its only a controlling,manipulative man that will do that.Do not dare give him ur password.And one of the traits of manipulative men is that;that want to have a one up on you.

Okay,having read all the different response to this story,all i can say is this@OP,you and you alone can make the best decision for your self and your kids.

As for those calling for the man's side of the story,hmmmm....pray not to ever be in these shoes cos it sounds ridiculous but then its the truth.I was once in the OP's shoes,and i tell you my own story sounds even more unbelievable to be true.

IMO,i think there is a big problem on our hands. As parents,seems we re doing a great job with the girl-child,but leaving the boy-child to understand their feelings and emotions all on their own.Or how else can one explain this rising case of men not loving and doing right by their wives?Maybe as parents we should
look closely at the way we bring up our sons cos this a serious indictment on mothers.(one of the reasons i left anyway,cudn't stand my son growing up to treat his wife the way his dad treated me,the home should be filled with love but it was sadly missing)

@madam CC,if you get to read this,i am the lady who contacted u via ur email and subsequently added u on FB this time last year,i am sorry i cudn't keep in touch,developed cold feet and decided to think my situation through on my own. Thank God i did,i am a more confident and happier woman now.Could remember this time last year,i was filled with sadness, loneliness and was hurting,dreaded the famous Feb 14th too,cos there was nothing to celebrate for me.But today,though no man in my life at the moment,but i get to celebrate with my kids and i am full of joy.

I cud understand why he wasn't honest at the on set,probably didnt trust me enough to do that and since he wasn't divorced and not exactly living has married couples.Anyway,thanks for ur contributions,i m feeling much better by the minute.

This is a true life story,and i m in so much pain right now.

First i am a member on this site,but i hardly respond to any topic,i just log on and read and log out.By the way,this a fictitious user name,i had to do that so i can be guaranteed of my anonymity.

Here is the story;i met this young 32 yr old man,who can best be described as awesome.i mean in all of my 32 yrs on earth,i have not met a man so kind hearted,honest and good.Yes good!and in all ramifications too(this has nothing to do with money).

He told me he was supposed to have settled down this year but that he discovered his girlfriend was Hiv positive while he is not.Hence they had to call off the wedding and she has since returned to the UK where she is now dating a guy with same status as hers.At first,he said we should start with an affair and see how it goes.we started,then some weeks into in,i just felt somethings didnt add up,so i searched him out on FB.Lo and behold!my guy was married!.I went through his albums and saw his wedding pix and discovered the wedding was a lavish one and it was just 7 months ago.

At first,i was hurt,sad and angry but later i realised it was an affair we started with.Anyway i asked him and he still maintained he wasn't married but there is a story that he is just not ready to share.To cut to the chase,he eventually told me last week and this is it;

He has been dating his girlfriend on/off for 10 yrs(he actually explained explicitly all that transpired in those years).So in 2010,when he was about travelling for his Masters in the UK,the GF insisted they do introduction cos according to him she was all of a sudden insecure.so they did that and according to him,he was travelling to nigeria every 3 months just to make her believe and trust him more.

He said after the intro,and he came home for the first time, any time they want to be intimate she ll insist on him using protection.He went along with it cos the excuse she puts up is that she doesn't want to get pregnant,and since he himself has vowed not to give birth to any of his kids here,he didn't complain.So that was the situation till there wedding night and the wife still insisted on condom.He said he was pissed off but he later agreed to go on with using protection.He said,2 days after the wedding,they both travelled to London for honeymoon and that's where things fell apart.

There plan was to honeymoon from London-paris-US.So while in London,the people helping them with the travelling to paris required them to do some test which they obliged.He said they didn't tell them what type of test they were doing,they jst took blood samples and that's where the result came out with husband been Negative and wife Positve with Hiv.

He said at first he threatened the doctors but when he looked sideways;his wife was already crying.Meaning she knew about it and still went ahead and married him.He said he was mad,betrayed and hurt and that day was the end of the honeymoon cos they both returned home separately.Wife to her house,and him to his house.And that has been the situation till this moment.

I asked him if no one questioned the absence of his wife,and he said he has been lying and covering up cos he jst cudn't tell any one that i ll be the first person he ll be telling.Now i told him to return to his wife,since marriage is for better for worse blah blah.He refused,i made him see reason that she cud have infected him,but cos of the love she protected him and so on.He asked how about kids,i told him,they cud do artificial insemination,all in all,i told him if it was him,that i m sure his wife would have stood by him.

Now the problem is,i m so in love with this guy and i m sure he feels something too,cos he feels guilty any time we re together.He says does it mean he didn't love his wife,for him to be able to go on without her for 7 months.We have been seeing for a month Plus now,but he opened up just last week,and yesterday i told him we should stop seeing.But i am so dejected,sad and and heartbroken that i need u guys to help me understand that i have done the best thing.

On a aside note,to those naysayers,something good can actually come out of Nairaland,cos this was where it all began......He saw my BB pin here when he used goggle to get some info and he was directed to Nairaland and the rest is history......

Pls guys i need your words of encouragement to get through this trying moment......i am a single mum by the way....i feel so sad that just when i eventually meet a single guy who doesn't mind my status,i had to give him up.