₦airaland Forum

Congrats

I know of a beggar who owns a bus that's on hire purchase. I stopped giving them money a long time ago.
There is this nasty observation i made. I went to repair my phone and opposite the stand is a beggar pretending to be blind...Whenever unsuspecting customers approach him he closes his eyes and begs,wen they passed he opens them. After observing this i passed his way and he begged me i paused and pretended to be searching my whole pockets for a little denomination meanwhile he was busy pouring blessings on me, after few seconds i dropped a piece of paper in his offering box and left o boy come see curses in hausa. i laff sotee i go jam truckpusher.

How will he not contract it after so much contact with those kids.

Jamean:
Wait, let me tell my brother to come speak for himself. He'll soon be here.

Tell him o....his comment is needed.

Mrval20:
It's not always interesting not having a brother, even though you get so so so much love and care from the family.
@op, as you grow older, you might feel less bored because you'd probably find that best friend who'd suffice for a bro.
I can't wait to have a son to call my real brother.

And too much is always expected of the only son..For a self-made introvert like me i wonder if i would ever make true friends

For me: I feel bored at times no guy around for men's talk. I feel pressurized to become relevant by all means. I can't even express myself, Always receiving advice both good and bad, always restricted from hanging out with friends and a host of other things.
How do feel as an only son

I think in my mother tongue..(Igbo language)

S/N Igbo Proverb Meaning(Literal)

1 Ura ga-eju onye nwuru anwu afo. A dead person shall have all the sleep necessary.

2 Gidi gidi bụ ugwu eze. Unity is strength

3 Chọọ ewu ojii ka chi dị Make hay while the sun shines

4 Otu onye tuo izu, o gbue ochu Knowledge is never complete: two heads are better than one.

5 Ihe ehi hụrụ gbalaba oso ka okuku huru
na-atụ onu Fools rush in where angels fear to tread.

6 Oge adighi eche mmadu Time and tide wait for nobody.

7 E lewe ukwu Egbue ewu. A buxom waist that makes her man(husband) kill a goat for her when he looks at it.

8 Ebe onye dara ka chi ya kwaturu ya. Where one falls is where his god pushed him down.

9 Ihe di woro ogori azuala na ahia. What was secret is revealed in the market place.

10 Ewu nwuru n'oba ji abughi agu gburu ya. A goat that dies in a barn was never killed by hunger.

11 A ma ka mmiri si were baa n'opi ugboguru? Who knows how water entered into the stalk of the pumpkin?

12 A chuo aja ma a hughi udele, a mara na ihe mere be ndimmuo.
If the vulture fails to hover at the end of a sacrifice, then you know that something happened in the land of spirits.

13 Si kele onye nti chiri; enu anughi, ala anu. Salute the deaf; if the heavens don't hear, the earth will hear.

14 Nwunye awo si na di atoka uto, ya jiri nuta nke ya kworo ya n'azu.
The female toad said that husband is so sweet that when she got
married, she carried her husband permanently on the back.

15 Ugo chara acha adi(ghi) echu echu A mature eagle feather will ever remain pure.

16 Onyeubiam adi(ghi) aza "Omeokachie." An indigent does not take the title of "Omeokachie" (i.e. one who completes whatever he puts his hand to)

17 Eze mbe si na olu oha di mma, mana oriri oha na-aka ahu.
The tortoise said that many hands at work is enjoyable, but many mouths to feed can be embarrassing.

18 Eze mbe si na ihe ya ji-achiri ihe egwu ya aga njem bu maka ya ezu ndiegwu.
The tortoise said that it always travels with its musical instrument
in case it meets other musicians.

20 Nwaanyi muta ite ofe mmiri mmiri, di ya amuta ipi utara aka were suru ofe.
If a woman decides to make the soup watery, the husband will
learn to dent the Garri before dipping it into the soup.

21 O na-abu a si nwata wuba ahu, o saba afo ya. Tell a child to wash his body, he washes his stomach.

22 Akwukwo juru n'ohia, ma a baa a choba okazi.
There are various leaves in the bush, but people go in to look for
okazi leaves.

23 Agwo emeghi nke o jiri buru agwo, umuaka achiri ya hie nku.
If a snake fails to show its venom, little kids will use it in tying
firewood.

24 Ukpala gbabara n'ikpo okuko na-ala ala mmuo.
The grasshopper that runs into the mist of fowls ends up in the
land of spirits.

25 Onye a kporo apari, o na-ehi n'amanna ya, abughi apari. A presumed fool who sleeps in his father's house is not a fool.

26 Ndi na-eje mposi abali na-ahu ukpana ndi mmuo. Those who defecate at night see the ghost grasshopper.

27 Nwata bunie nna ya enu, akpaamu ya ayochie ya anya. If a child lifts his father, his scrotum will blindfold him.

28 Onye hapu onu ya, uguru arachaa ya. If one fails to lick his lips, the harmattan will do it.
29
Okuko si na ihe ya ji-ele anya n'enu ma ya na añu mmiri bu na ihe na-egbu si n'igwe abia.
The chicken says it looks up when drinking water because what kills
it comes from the sky.

30 Ijiji na-enweghi onye ndumodu na-eso ozu ala n'inyi. A fly that has no counselor follows the corpse to the grave.

31 "Nwunye anyi, nwunye anyi": ka ndeli bia ka anyi mara onye o bu nwunye ya.
"Our wife, our wife": come midnight and we will know whose wife
she really is.

32 Ula towa uto, ekwowe ya ekwowe. When sleep becomes enjoyable, we snore.

33 O bialu be onye abiagbuna ya, mgbe o ga-ala mkpumkpu apukwana ya n'azu.
May one's visitor not constitute a problem, so that on his departure
he will not leave with a hunchback.

34 Nwa ovu na-eto, o di ka o ga-aka nne ya.
When the baby wren is growing, it looks like it would be bigger than its mother.

35 Okuko na-arogoro ite onu, chetekwe mma gburu ya.
The chicken frowns at the cooking pot, ignoring the knife that killed it.

36 Ihe ka-nte bata n'onu nte, nte etefu. When something greater than the pigmy cricket enters its hole, it takes off.

37 Uzu na-amaghi akpu ogene lee egbe anya n'odu.
The blacksmith who does know how to forge a metal gong should
look at the tail of a kite.

38 Oke oshimmiri anokataghi rie onye obula nke o na-ahughi ukwu ya anya.
The ocean never swallows a person with whose leg it does not come
in contact.

39 Onye buru chi ya uzo, o gbagbue onwe ya n'oso. He who walks before his godly guardian does the race of his life.

40 Okuko nyuo ahu, ana achuwa ya oso. When the fowl farts, the ground becomes a nuisance.

Add yours if you are a real son of the soil

Cute pic buh where is Koredo abi london girls don kidnap am?

Fbulousmark- #00000(easy to accept)

I can't see any church building, congregation or whatever depicts a church.


Happy birthday in arears!

Tecno M7, Nokia Xl Gionee Elife

Nice tip bookmarked

Nice pichure

Actually Fat girls/ladies are easier to get and laid...

chidekings:
bro this is a forum not ur family meeting.

You must not comment...Busybody

LIFE Vs. POCKET: IN KUDI WE TRUST?

First, I'm ain't married yet but I do at times go on imaginary
honeymoons, vacation and hibernation to relieve my brains of mental
strain. Hence, it'd seem like ages since the last time I posted
something here; and those of you - my great fans - who must have
been worried about my absence, here's mental pabulum, loaded with
minerals, for your digestion.

No, you musn't be in America to see their currency: the very first
time I saw an American dollar bill right from my Nigerian hideout, I
observed the inscription "In God We Trust" printed on it. Now, if
you've been to the Northern part(s) of Nigeria, you'd hear "ba
turanci!", "sannu mallam", etc and, perhaps, "kawo kudi", etc. Now,
"kudi" means money in Hausa language, as "ego" is in Igbo.
Now, let's get deep down to business. There are many professions in
the world, and each profession deals with a certain aspect of human
existence to a certain degree. Truck pushing, drugs, prostitution,
robbery, political thievery, money laundering, hired assassination,
terrorism, gangsterism, hooliganism, political thuggery, forgery, wife
battery, etc are all professions, you know. See, I'm not a cop but
if you ask/bribe me, I'd say the teaching profession is the best in
the world.

Meanwhile, I'd like to particularize on the medical profession for this
is where human life hangs. I've nothing against doctors, mind you,
for I'd have dabbled in the medical profession but the thought of
sewing people as Tailors do to clothes rattled my fingers, ears and
teeth. So, I zoomed off and that was that. But I still give it up to
them, they are doing a good job. Hence, to our brothers and
sisters, fathers and mothers in the medical profession I say kudos!
But now - oh by Hippocrates! - it seems some of our doctors
nowadays are gradually deviating from the rules of the Art as
enshrined in the Hippocratic Oath in the sense that free, humane and
humanitarian services have been reduced or are no longer rendered as
expected (in clinics and hospitals); this, I'm awfully sorry to say, is
prevalent in Igboland.

What sparked off this update is the fact that the management of a
certain govt. hospital (name withheld) in Enugu state has been
charged to court over exorbitant bills against a patient, in as much
as the patient eventually died in the hospital.
It'd lead to debate if I question why doctors and/or the management
of hospitals charge astronomical bills before/during/after treating
patient(s). By implication, it'd seem a sick but poor man need not
contemplate medical treatment since he wouldn't afford the bills? Oh,
thank God for herbalists!

Often people are stranded in hospitals because they couldn't pay the
bills. What is really going on - are such doctors after the life of
the patient(s) entrusted in their custody and care or after their (the
doctors') pockets? Hence, the title: Life Vs. Pocket: In Kudi We
Trust?

There are different socio-economic classes as everyone musn't be as
rich as King Solomon, hence it questions the exobitant fees charged
in hospitals. Do such doctors take cognizance of the fact that
selfless and humanitarian services rendered will go a long way to
make this world a better place? Why the demand for instant deposit
of huge amount of money before attending to/treating someone in
serious and critical condition? Suppose the person dies before the
deposit is provided? I've even heard that politics and preferential
treatments are incorporated in some hospitals. Now, if all
professions begin to charge such fees or do those things, then we're
doomed!

So, I ask: what's the fate of those that cannot afford exorbitant
medical bills - they should just dig their graves, die, get buried and
rot away? Oh, poor men carefully calculate and regulate the rate
you impregnate your wives because of unexpected medical expenses
before/during/after delivery. Absconding and abandoning your wives
in the hospital is not the solution. Everybody, I charge you to pray,
fast, drink/sprinkle holy water/olive oil, bind and cast demons, and
avoid human elements that might land you unexpectedly in hospitals.
I'm ain't spoiling business for some people, I presume?

I however admit that certain medical procedures for treating patients
require special equipment or exceptional skills/expertise of experts/
consultants, etc yet is that an absolute justification for fleecing and
shearing patients like sheep? I monitor what I eat/drink and do, sirs:
hospitals and prison yards ain't for me - I swear!

Now, we go to church, shout hallelujah, jump here and there, but
when it comes to applying and rendering humane and humanitarian
acts it becomes a different ball game. Hence, I seize this medium to
appeal to our doctors and other health workers/medical professionals
to please UNDERSTAND that they are dealing with human LIFE, and
if possible, REDUCE exorbitant medical BILLS.

Ladies and gentlemen, I ask you once again as I rise, Life Vs.
Pocket: In Kudi We Trust?

Jehovah bu Ezeh

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Don’t you hate boring people? The one thing I fear most when
going out to socialize or network is running into someone who is
boring. Not because I personally won’t be entertained by what they
have to say — although that may very well be the case — but
because the conversation that ensues is excruciating.
I feel like a dentist pulling teeth, searching for something interesting
about them or their lives. Nevertheless, I have had no choice but to
arrive at one conclusion: boring people are boring — plain and
simple; no matter how many teeth you pull, they will still sound
boring, but with a lisp.
Being boring, in actuality, is not only about who you are as a
person, but also how you present yourself. For those of you in
need of some sprucing up, I have compiled a list of the 10
differences between boring people and interesting people. Use them
to your advantage, young grasshoppers.
1. Interesting people like to have
conversations; boring people like to avoid
them.
Human beings primarily communicate through words — this is how
our species interacts. If you are the person that goes to a party
and picks a quiet corner to sit in, then shame on you. You are
missing out on a ton of networking opportunities. You may not like
anyone at the party because they are all scumbags, but you never
know when having a scumbag around could come in handy.
He could be a potential client or investor for the future — or be
able to connect you with someone that will be. Or maybe he has a
hot sister you can bang. Boring people usually aren’t boring at
their core; they are simply introverted. Don’t be shy; talking to
someone new won’t kill you.
2. Boring people are those that enjoy too
much comfort.
We all have a comfort zone, but we don’t all decide to stay within
its bounds. In my opinion, a comfort zone is good for one thing
and one thing only: knowing what needs to be done to leave it in
order to start living. You already know what makes for a
complacent, lethargic, comfortable life. Now do the exact opposite of
that and you won’t be so boring — or so bored.
3. Interesting people have several hobbies;
boring people have a hobby.
Being interesting involves more than having something that you enjoy
doing and enjoy talking about. If you have one hobby — especially
if it is one that most people don’t share — then people will find
you boring. It’s great if you have that one thing that you are
passionate about, but if you are worried about being too boring, try
to diversify and find yourself two more hobbies that spark your
interest.
4. Interesting people are well-informed.
Being perceived as interesting revolves around holding conversations.
The more that you have to talk about, the better. This of course
does not mean that you ought to be starting a conversation with
someone and running through a handful of topics one after another,
but the more knowledgeable you are of different things, the better
the chances are that you and your conversation partner will have
something to talk about. Be up-to-date on the news and on the
most popular pop culture.
5. Boring people stay put; interesting
people like to explore.
It’s one thing to be perceived as being boring and it’s another to
actually be boring. This goes back to leaving your comfort zone. If
you want to be interesting, then you need to be interested in doing
things. You need to explore the world, both around you and the
world that requires a 16-hour flight. Go out and explore.
6. Interesting people have a hunger for life;
boring people are content with frozen
dinner.
Variety, variety, variety — life has such a smorgasbord to offer
us, that sticking to that which you know is, well, boring. Stop
eating the same food, stop hanging out with the same people at the
same places. Doing the same boring things guarantee a boring life
because it avoids change.
7. Change makes for an exciting life.
If you want an interesting, exciting life, then embrace change. It is
the fear of change that causes stagnancy and that causes people
with much potential to be labeled as boring people. If you do not
learn to enjoy change then you will not only lack success, you will
lack joy in your life.
8. Interesting people are driven people.
Boring people are push-overs.
Figure out what it is that you want and then plan a way to get it.
Letting others decide your destiny, being complacent and accepting
whatever leftovers others throw you is pathetic and boring. Do not
let people push you around; stand your ground!
9. Interesting people are dreamers. Boring
people are posers.
If you don’t dream, then you can’t possibly make your dreams a
reality. Our minds can be our most interesting playground as long
as we spend enough time focusing on that which presents itself
among the swing sets and sandboxes. Picture what you want and
what you want to do in your future. Imagine your life the way you
wish you could live it and focus on it every waking moment of
your life. Then work on making your dreams your reality.
10. Leading an interesting life is easy if
you want it.
More importantly than anything else is truly and completely wanting
to live an interesting and exciting life. You must want to do things
you are not comfortable doing. You must want to experience new
experiences and you must want to get a fuller, more in-depth
understanding of the way other people see the world. You must
want to have an open mind. The world is an exciting place, so get
excited!
Follow him on Twitter: @ MrPaulHudson

DEM NEVA BORN D CHICK

My sis burnt hers....you can return it, a pastor might have brainwashed you....#religiousfanatics

MrCork: ..which post?...women gist..guys do not gist...only g@y men gist. ....and then u said u enjoy gist with gyals... Bro,i don't mean to sound rude but waz only tryn to find out how long u been g@y.

....we hav notin against g@y people coz its yor human right to be g@y,so plus be proud (no offense)

Looking for partner? check my profile pic and u will be disappointed because i dont look gay....sowie keep hunting ok?

I have experimented with discussing latest trend in fashion,celebrity gossips and even funny stories but i get an "ok" at the end.

valmunich: Usually, there's not always that 'something' that leads to the gist, some will just greet and after greetings the next line will be 'Any gist for me?' That's pretty shitty

Exactly what i am saying., i have observed that majority of girls that do that are boring and reserved

MrCork: . .. gist? ... u enjoy gistin wit females?... Bro r u g@y? (no offense)

I don't think u understand the post....ur opinion tho

My girlfriend and some female friends are fond of this: In the middle of a conversation esp on social networks, they would tell to you to gist them. What kind of gist do these ladies expect?

Culled from LIB
Read journalist Femi Owolabi's incisive and different argument
below...
“If you do not know Nicholas Ibekwe, he is currently the most
talked about Premium Times journalist who ‘exposed’ the bribery
deal between popular Nigerian pastor, T.B Joshua and the
journalists who went to his Synagogue Church of All Nation,
where a collapsed building killed many. I have followed Nicholas’
tweets as they were consistently retweeted into my Twitter
timeline. He is angry about many things; that Lagos Governor
Fashola met with Joshua behind closed doors, and after the
meeting, dodged reporters, and perhaps his most prioritized anger;
how Joshua offered N50,000 bribe to each journalist at the
press conference of September 14. He soon released a recording
of the bribery deal he had alleged. And then, on the 23rd of
September [yesterday], he eventually came out with his story:
“Why I exposed T.B. Joshua for bribing journalists.”
So, why did Nicholas publish the audio? “…when I woke up last
Saturday morning and saw the picture of President Goodluck
Jonathan shaking hands with a grinning TB Joshua with headlines
like ‘Jonathan consoles TB Joshua,’ I said damn it! I couldn’t
stomach this blatant impunity.”
“Journalists shouldn’t be seen or heard telling the prime suspect
they would write ‘just like you said’ after he offered to buy
their consciences with N50, 000,” he also said.”
“I hadn’t listened to the audio. But in Nicholas’ story published
in Premium Times, the audio was reproduced. I reached for my
earpiece and gave that audio a rapt attention. Four minutes or
there about. Perhaps I didn’t get the real thing, I played it
again. And then, again. Time wouldn’t allow me, I would have
transcribed here. Only first-class thinkers would agree with me.
That audio I listened to has nothing to do with a bribery deal.
Wait, you can call for my head later. Go back to that audio and
listen again! In the audio, we hear Joshua announcing some 750k;
to be shared, 50k each to journalists, to fuel their car. Some
ask questions about the issue at hand, and Joshua– in a tone
that depicts sobriety– answers them. And, as they round off,
Joshua asks, ‘So, what are you going to write?’ and they all
laugh at what seem a sarcastic remark from Joshua. I laughed,
too.”
“In his story, however, Nicholas argued, “He clearly meant for
the money to influence the reporting of the event, ‘So what are
you going to write?’” he had asked. That makes it a bribe.
Simple.’’
"Your head is in the air. Such is the problem when you are
highly opinionated. By what logical conclusion do we pronounce
that bribery?”
“Let me quickly state that it is wrong for Governor Fashola and
President Jonathan to be seen patting Joshua’s shoulder over the
collapsed building that was largely his fault. And of course, this
is not an attempt to write in defence of Joshua. If you care to
know, I may soon renounce my membership of the Pentecostal
movement, following many atrocities within this Movement that do
not stand well with me.”
“We are only stupid to assume 750k is money enough a bribe
from T.B Joshua to hush journalists. The story was already in
the mainstream media. I have watched NEMA PRO on Channels
TV lamenting the difficulties they were having with T.B Joshua’s
church authority. All had become clearer that there was illegal
addition of storeys to the building which eventually resulted in the
collapse. And even Joshua himself knows that the ‘hovering craft’
tale is not buyable. So, why exactly would he bribe journalists
with 750k?”
“What is my point? That 50k is appropriately called honorarium.
If after the announcement of that 50k for journalists to fuel
their car and that Nicholas had rejected, he was then called back
to further negotiate an increase, then it becomes a bribe! They are
desperate about hiding something! Oxford dictionary helps us with
the definition of an honorarium: ‘A payment given for professional
services that are rendered nominally without charge.’ T.B. Joshua
is no fool to think 750k is okay to bribe journalists so the
story is not exposed. That is simply honorarium, and it follows
the tradition of the church.”
“On the other hand, Oxford dictionary says this about bribe: ‘A
sum of money or other inducement offered or given to bribe
someone.’ Is Nicholas insinuating that 50k to fuel his car poses
a bribery threat? Is it that Nicholas couldn’t have accepted that
50k and still go ahead to publish his investigative findings? When
such honorariums are doled out, no journalist is held by any
obligatory terms to accept. Depending on the circumstances
surrounding the story, I, as a [freelance] journalist may accept
or reject such honorarium. It would take the next lifetime to have
me bribed so I won’t expose a story. If you decide to force the
‘honorarium’ on me, I will take it. I have a network of friends
whose stomachs are an empty tank of beer. They will beer with
that money and that story you are desperate in hiding from the
public would have a smooth ride to the press.”
“So, like Nicholas, if I were at the meeting with T.B Joshua, I
would have rejected the honorarium offer. But, I will not refer to
it as bribe.”
“Well, bribery is a criminal offense. And if Nicholas insists this
is a bribe deal, he shouldn’t hesitate in writing the lawyer, Femi
Falana, on the need to take this case up.”
“It is no news, that journalists in Nigeria are underpaid. Nicholas,
in his story, admits this. According towww.payscale.com, a
[USA] journalist earns an average salary of $36,834 per year.
According to me, a Nigerian journalist’s pay in a year is around
$6,000. It is not totally a bad pay. What is bad is the delay
and irregularities in the payment. While I was covering Osun
election, I interviewed an academic, Babatunde Bakare, at the
Bowen University. I didn’t know him from anywhere. After the
interview, he asked me how I was surviving as a journalist. I
told him I have other things that I do that pay my bills. Even
though I wasn’t seriously investigating any story, I was just
seeking the opinion of an academic on the election, Babatunde felt
obliged to give me something to support my transport and
logistics. He would later tell me that until his recent appointment
as an academic, he was a senior producer/scriptwriter for one of
Africa’s largest TVs, AIT. And he wasn’t paid salary in the
last ten months he had worked with AIT.”
“I also stopped taking Sam Nda-Isaiah’s presidential ambition
seriously the day I heard he owed his reporters at Leadership
Newspaper, four month salary. It took a Twitter/Facebook
protest to get Sam to bow to his employees’ demands. These
delays, irregularities, underpayment, are not justifiable reasons to
accept bribe. No, they are not. These reasons, however, justify
the collection of an honorarium, such type that does not mean
you should report a black story as white.”
“Nicholas, then, advises journalists to ‘explore other related and
legitimate means of making money like researching, writing, and
editing reports for NGO…’ This is the silliest of all advices.
Journalism is a professional job. The burden of researching,
investigating a story, is already time consuming. News are time
bound, and Nicholas risks his job with Premium Times if he fails
to beat deadlines for the kind of ‘pending stories’ he mentions in
his piece. I make money as a private academic researcher. The
months I have more than two research jobs, I suspend my
journalistic activities. And the day I become a full time journalist,
I should resign as a researcher. Journalistic work is enough work
to get enough pay if things were right.”
“As I conclude, I should raise an issue. After the three day
media/blogger interactive forum in Ekiti in February, participants
were each offered 50k honorarium by the organizers. My name is
Femi Owolabi. I received the N50,000 (of course it never
influenced my subsequent criticisms. Many who also accepted the
money had asked Governor Kayode Fayemi harsher questions
during the forum and even wrote critically about his policies after
we had left). However, Stanley Azuakola, the editor of The
Scoop and Chinedu Ekeke, the editor of Ekekeee in their separate
critical reports, revealed that they politely rejected the N50,000.
Out of about thirty participants, Nicholas Ibekwe inclusive, I am
yet to read of any other apart from Stanley, Chinedu and
Stanley Achonu (the Operations Lead of BudgIT), who didn’t take
that N50,000 honorarium. It is, therefore, logical to believe that
Nicholas Ibekwe, who now accuses his fellow journalists of bribery
when it was honorarium, received such in February in Ekiti.”
“If he didn’t receive that money, here is my apology in advance.”

i see