You’re a pretty girl, formally educated, and sweet. Yet, for some reason, men don’t seem to take you seriously.

Men go out with women and walk away with one of two agendas: (a) Sex (b) The possibility of something serious. If you continually find yourself quickly dismissed, it means you fall in the "SEX" option.

The Reasons:

1: You Never Buy your own Things:

Guys are quick to notice women who are overly dependent on a man to buy them even as little as a drink or who have high taste for things they can't afford. Always insist on paying just so he knows you’re willing and able.

2: Too Easy:

You say no the first two times but drop the panties on his third attempt. Always try to Stick to your guns.

3: Posting Semi-Nude Photos On Facebook:

Posting semi-nude photos on Facebook is an outcry for male attention and public reassurance. Overexposure is off-putting, but modesty leaves mystery.

4: Appearance:

In the eyes of men, you are what you wear. Don’t expect to be treated like anything different than what your appearance implies.

5: Constantly on BBM,Tweeter and Facebook: A man would wonder why you seem to be there "always", even if you have nothing bad going on.

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Often people say the only difference between a "girl -boy relationship" and "marriage" is just the name. Well that might be true if the relationship prior to marriage was a great one. But which ever way, a man would at any time appreciate his woman making some few tiny changes after taking his surname.

So what are these changes that women need to make?

1: What's Your Facebook Relationship Status?

Most women don't even list their relationship status and the reason which most at times is usually because they're not sure of their relationships...where it's headed or how it will end. But after marriage you finally have a solid reason to do it. And besides this will help in chasing creeps and exes away, so take advantage of it. Show your husband you have faith in your marriage and list it.

2: Is He Aware Of The Plans You Make?

Marriage isn't business as usual when you own your life and whatever you do. A man and a woman becomes one after marriage and that includes a woman letting her husband know of her plans. Surprises are good but men are that bad at it. So learn to carry your man along especially once you have taken his SURNAME.

3: How Often Do You Eat Dinner With Him

Your husband is your family—officially—and families eat dinner together more often than not. At least, the ones who stay together do… So see if your schedules can accommodate the two of you having dinner together somewhere out of home. It refreshes every union.

4: How Long Does the "FUN YOU" Last?

To your friends, not to your husband. Unfortunately, the second you become a Mrs. your friends expect you to become boring. You have to work a little harder, at least the first few months of marriage, to show them you’re not going to totally bail on them.

5: Is Your Weight On the HIGH or LOW after marriage?

This is where many women do get it all wrong. Most feel after marriage they have nothing more to prove.

Really?

Says who?

I think been extra conscious of your weight after marriage will mean a lot to any man. Ease back into eating normally so your husband doesn't freak out thinking he’s living the typical story of the woman who turns wife and then TURNS well FAT.

6: Do You Ever Say You're Married To Flirty Guys?

When you were a girlfriend, it's understandable if you waited for that moment to come where you say your status. But once married it’s embarrassing for your husband (even if he’s not there to witness it) if you wait two hours to mention to a flirty man that you’re a married woman. So when men are around who could potentially take an interest in you, mention that you’re married.

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3. Betrayals and Saboteur

When words came to the rest of our enemies that I had rebuild the walls and not a gap was left, then they sent a message that we meet together in a neutral place for talks... (Nehemiah 6:1)

There are people you never will come across in life until you begin to succeed, not that they haven't been around or known you. All the while you were struggling they have always seen you but never approach you till your story changes... be watchful of such people in your marriage and relationships.

Most of them are the real battles you have been undergoing all the while, so they are appearing because you have up until that moment conquered them, so they have to change the method from hidden to direct approach.

For MEN:

You suddenly notice a friend calling you to join them for a drink at a joint and at night (even though they know you are married), most would ask you to come over to some hotel bar for a chat and at night.

When this starts to go on, please do not be deceived into believing "it's normal" I tell you the truth is a matter of time before your family become a second choice to you and all your effort all this while in building a meaning home will just vanish... it's the enemy at work, this isn't some modern world crap, spear yourself that nonsense.

For WOMEN:

You notice at certain point in your married life, friends start making you and not you making them. The worst of it all, if you observe you get to know that they often are specialist at marriage counselling even though most are still single women. This types tear homes apart especially homes that carry GLORY. If you don't realize you are in a war you will loose woefully.

The reason most people are not able to dictate who their real marital enemies are is because when they come out everyday, they look out for the guy with two horns, ugly and very black, so when they don't see any one like that, they just assumes everybody onward is a friend.

Too BAD, the world has advanced and so does your adversaries, they are more like you, simple people on the look, even more good looking than you.

The bible says "by their fruit we shall know them" that is to tell you that your enemies look more like you physically, so in other to dictate them it will be by their ways.

If you don't pick them out, they will destroy the dreams you and your partner has just began to lay the foundation. Their sole purpose is to terminate your dreams and when they are done, off they go.

You know the popular saying that says "When there is money, friends come and when trouble comes, off they go" ?

Be watchful your Marriage means a lot to God who instituted it.

Series To Be Cont'd...

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It seems pretty normal for every union to have challenges or battles but what isn't normal is for a person not to be able to dictate how, where and why those challenges and battles come.

Every man and woman alike grew up with a certain dream they wish to accomplish in life, they have a picture of the type of walls they want to build around them, up until they found each other and got married.

That dream won't die because of the marriage but something does happen, the two dreams or walls built over the years collides with each other and in other to have a balance, both will crush to the ground first, as a result of the impact. So then a rebuilding or remoulding is required to match both individuals from the scratch. And that is where it all began.

For those who are too lazy to rebuild, we end up hearing things like separation, and divorce from them because both parties are not a good team mate in this project.

But for those who have met their real team mates: here are the highlights of challenges and battles and how to conquer them;

1. Mockery and Ridicule

Nehemiah 4:1 'When Sanballat heard that we were rebuilding the walls, he became angry and was greatly incensed. He ridiculed the Jews'

That is to say when your adversaries notice you and your partner are good match and are set to build a union that is worthwhile than theirs, first thing you see them do is "BEING ANGRY" over you and then they mock you.

You know why?

Because they don't believe completely that you both can make it to finish. They down-size you at first just to intimidate and put fear in you. This is a big challenge especially for those who value public opinion more over their own opinion about themselves. Many have checked-out of their marriages/relationship at this stage. The adversary uses this to make you feel inferior.

How then do you overcome this stage? Want answers?

See Neh 4:4 (Don't give up and start complaining and making excuses for everything BUT pray to God that their mockery return back to them as it came).

2. Attacks

Nehemiah 4:8 When the enemy heard that the rebuilding had gone ahead, they became even more angry and PLOTTED to attack, fight and stir up the Jews in other to stop the project.

Listen, if you dare succeed to overcome POINT 1 ABOVE, bear in mind you have succeeded in taking laughter off the mouth of your enemies and you know what that means. When they are no longer laughing, it means WAR.

On your enemies realization that despite their ridicule you ignored THEM unlike others and continue with building your marriage to a better standard as designed by God, attacks will come in different forms both physical and spiritual with the sole purpose of just frustrating and distracting your union.

The attacks comes in various forms:

(a) They try to make everyone around you turn against you via gossips and accusations.

(b) They withdraw their friendship indefinitely with you just to cause you loneliness and distractions (but trust God as your companion)

(c) Spiritually they try to turn you away from God, making you loose faith in God's power over your life

(d) They treat you and everything that concerns you with contempt etc.

When you begin to notice such things, just know you are on the right track and the enemy is at war because of that.

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