You may be wondering what that means.

OK, I wouldn't say that all men have a hold over their sexuality, some just can't have a woman around without misbehaving (and this shouldn't be because we ought to have rule over our spirit) but what I'm trying to portray here is the part a lady plays in getting a young man to view her primary purpose as, "satisfying his sexual urges".

Many ladies get sexually abused in and out of relationships. Many don't even know it's abuse because it's suddenly becoming a status quo (a very wrong one).

There are several reasons resonating from the part of the woman which can cause a man to view her as a sex tool, to demand for sex from her whenever his urges call and to have it.

Before I progress, I would want to boldly declare that sex should not be done outside of marriage. God made it for marriage and anyone doing it outside of that platform is stealing sex and abusing his/herself.

I also want to say that a woman can be valued so high and this has nothing to relate with how good she is in bed. These forms the basis of the following points:

(1) You wonder why he can't control his sexual urges while he's around you when you help him view you as sexy and not as beautiful.

Someone said something I really love and that is, "when a man says a woman is sexy, he's not relating to true beauty, brains or virtues rather he means that you look like someone he'll want to have in bed".

I paraphrased that. Sexy relates to the word sex or sensual (erotic sensations). So, I'll rather you tell me that I'm beautiful than say I'm sexy. Everyone take note.

When you dress to expose your personal areas as a woman, your laps, your breast, etcetera you tell a man around you that you're loose and you don't really care about who sees what should be a personal sight.

That may not be your intentions but that's what he reads from your dressing. The body of a woman is not like that of a man. It attracts and if you carry it the wrong way, it will give the wrong attractions.

You parade your privacy in lingerie, panty-like shorts, exposing tops (ladies please stop wearing net like clothes without an underwear both for tops or down or gowns) and you think you sway his/their minds.

You only appeal sexually and that's the picture he/they have about you in his/their minds. Nothing more.

IT'S WISDOM DEAR LADY TO DRESS TO EDIFY AND NOT TO KILL.

Watch it, even what you wear at home matters. Reason is, people come into your house and that's even when they get to stay alone with you and if you ain't careful, your exposures will drive a mind to start wanting what it was never thinking before or if it was thinking about it before, you then hasten the resolve to go for what the eyes are seeing.

Give your body some respect. Have you not read where it's said in the Bible that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit. The temple of the Holy Spirit should not be clothed with any skimpy thing.

(2) You allow him touch you irreverentially and you think his mind is not going haywire.

One day, he'll love to go deeper than the touches. He opens his arms so wide whenever he sees you and you jump into them (all wrapped up) and you may not have the wrong intentions but you're creating a notion which you may not easily delete.

You allow him hold you anywhere he deems fit without apologies. He ravages or plays with your body as though it belongs to him.

He carries your waist whenever he pleases as though that's his newborn baby. You're still thinking it was a mistake, he does it over and over and then what are you waiting for dear lady. Your tongue abilities are not for gossips.

This is where it should be useful. Look him Stern in the face and tell him never to try that in his entire life again. if you need some air of boldness, you can employ me. He tries to get angry, who cares?

Not me. If he walks out of your life, good riddance to lethal evil. You worth more than that. You can imagine the temple of the Holy Spirit being swayed, messed up by mortal hands.

(3)- You talk and act as though your life is in his hands.

You can't make good decisions for yourself. You depend on him as though your destiny ain't gonna make a headway if he's not involved.

That's part of it. That's part of why he is making you a intimacy gadget because men will demand a pay for the favours they do you. It's only God that Loves perfectly.

You will know the extent to which a man is yielded to God for him to do you some favours without wanting your back on his bed. You've driven him to think that your mind has nothing worth more coming out with the way you depend on him.

He looks for how to pay himself and he calls for your body and because you don't believe you can take charge of your life and create greater good out of it, you succumb.

Listen dear woman,your life is not dependent on any man. You are totally responsible for the outcome of your life. You go to God and work it out with Him and not to a man.

You have in you great potentials that can make you be of global impact. It's in you, go and develop you and quit destroying you in the hands of that man.

(4): You're desperate about marriage.

When you talk with him, you have no plans of your own to talk about. You have no great aspirations, dreams, visions, etc.

All you guys talk about is him and then he feels like the player with the ball when he's with you. You have no skill you want to work on. You have no passion (to be of great impact to humanity) that's driving you blindly.

All you talk about with him Is marriage,your problems, blah, blah blah. That's why he doesn't need apologies to anyone to want you in his bed.

He knows you're desperate about marriage and he knows with that desperation, a promise of marriage can get you to be at his Beck and call and that's all it takes to get you into having sex with him, doing his dishes, his laundry, cooking, playing wife when you're not even in view to be courted.

He has gotten you and he's just keeping you around to play maid for some time before he discards you on account of a worthless reason.

Be wise dear. Have you not read that you are the light of the world. How can a light suddenly become despondent, miserable, without a life, helpless without a man, etc.

Where is the real you? Go and discover what God has created you to be on earth and pursue it with a reckless abandonment.

Pursue God, Pursue purpose and let the men be the ones pursuing you. That way, you stand in a good position to set quality standards and pitch on them and men will respect you greatly for that. You're not just handy for them.

You're not at their mercy and it could be the other way round. Give yourself a better worth and Change your worth in the minds of men and even fellow women and even children.

(5): Vulgar, Obscene talks:

You allow him talk immorally around you and you just float with him. You laugh at it, pretending to belong. Come on lady, have standards.

Let your standards be so high that the man who really wants to be part of your life will have to come up spiritually, morally, all round because of the virtues he sees in you.

Be that woman who will cause a man to rearrange his line of words before coming around. Be that woman who will make a man to go for more of God before he thinks of pitching his tent around you.

When a young man is free to do all his rubbish stunts around you without a Stern rebuke, something wrong is cooking up.

Then you've created a perfect picture in his mind of a lady he can easily get into whenever he wants and you think it's not possible.

Gradually, the Obscene talks starts forming your thoughts and next, it starts arousing you. The next time he's around, you don't know when you fall into one romantic trance and then a dream of sexual Intercourse which becomes reality to you and you start regretting.

You try to prevent it from happening again but you've already cracked the wall and then you become a constant prey for the predator unless Jesus intervenes on your behalf.

Create the atmosphere you want around you whether a relationship leading to marriage or casual friendships.

(6): Most vital point - You close up your relationship with Jesus ones He's around because you don't want to be called a Jewish girl or a Jesus - rat or church girl or whatever.

You want to belong. (laughs), belong to where? A failing circle, a group of doomed people.
That's the primary thing that exposes you to be the perfect girl for an erotic relationship in his mind.
Lots of Christians do this and that's why they keep making loads of mistake even though they've been in Church for long.

Quit being in church, become a Christian. Go public with your Christianity. Any friendship or relationship that makes it hard for you to talk freely about Jesus is a scam and it's going to bring your downfall.

Young lady, what gives you the greatest worth in life is your depth of relationship with Jesus and how much you've learnt and inculcated His standards into your daily living.

I can't overemphasize this. In a world today where the female creature has been tagged with very demeaning value. Every tribe, tradition, race, etc tags their own definition to who or what they think a female is which are all fallacies.

They don't truly define woman. Only God's word defines her ideally. Only Jesus gives you the true worth of you so I think you should value your relationship with Him above any other.

Dear Lady, make talking about Jesus and living for Him a priority. Anyone that walks away from your life because of this is not meant to be there at first.

They are those destiny destroyers that are being talked about. Cling unto God to save yourself from regrets.

You may use Him to ward of these wrong people but when you draw closer, you'll even go head over heels with Jesus because you'll come to find out that you and Him, that's the best relationship you can ever have.

I trust God that this will bless you my dear women out there and even men, I trust that you'll grab some truth also.

Dear Lady, My desire is to see you become the true woman that God has ordained you to be and I know it's possible. I don't care to know the mistakes you might have made in life or what definition the world has tagged to you.

You can have a new life if you choose. Meet with Jesus and find the life you need in Him. I love you and you're always in my prayers.

AWAKE TO THE TRUE WOMAN
GLORY IFUNANYA OKOLOCHA

For any private questions information you may want to ask or get, you can send a mail to gloryifunanya11@gmail.com