₦airaland Forum

Wiz-Prince:
Hi Peeps, Lets Test Our English Knowledge.

I Know Some of You Thinks English Is Simple But i Bet You'll Find It Difficult in This Aspect!

...Please Translate

"HOW MANY YEARS YOU TAKE SENIOR ME"

To Simple and Correct English... Let The Fun Begin.

BIGVAJINA: i wil start with myself, "a dove"

MR XELA: On ma way home on
monday evening, I saw
a suit case! I took it
home and I opened it
and behold what I found
inside;$20,000 dollars!!
Fear first catch me, but
I took the bag home
and when ...I emptied It,
Ifound some
Documents, ID card,
ATM card and an
Iphone. Ithought about
throwing the sim away
and keep the phone and
also dispose the
documents and keep
the money. After a long
thought, I decided to
leave things as they
were, hoping thatthe
owner would call. Not
long after a call came
through on the Iphone, I
picked and talked with
the caller. Apparently it
was the owner of the
bag coz he named
absolutely every
content of the bag. We
met afterwards and i
handed him the bag. he
offered me
$2,000dollars but i
turned it down ,
hecollected my number
and i left.Yesterday he
called me and offered
me a job at Chevron
worth 750,000 Naira per
month, a 3 bedroom flat
fully furnished, and a
2012 BMW X6 As I was
smiling and testing the
car my brother just
slappedme and said
"Oya Oya Oya Wake up!!
Eba don ready!"

OPEYEMI AD: this is not a dream o, i mean reality

OPEYEMI AD: A guy won a #10 million lottery, kept the money inside a 'Ghana must go' bag, went under a tree, buried the money, snapped the spot and the tree with a camera and decided to travel to London. As he was on a plane heading to London, he brought out the picture from the camera, stared at it and was shocked to see a guy on top of the tree smiling

What would you do if you were the one?

more of this at https://www.facebook.com/lafwithme

goofie: ignorance is when u ask d above question..

7evenmel: MUST READ!!
During lunch at work last week, I
ate 3 plates of beans (which I
know I shouldn’t). When I got
home, my husband seemed
excited to see me and exclaimed
delightedly, “Darling I have a
surprise for dinner tonight”. He
then blindfolded me and led me
to my chair at the dinner table. I
took a seat and just as he was
about to remove my blindfold,
the telephone rang. He made me
promise not to touch the
blindfold until he returned and
went to answer the call.
The beans I had consumed were
still affecting me and the
pressure was becoming
unbearable, so while my
husband was out of the room I
utilized that opportunity,
shifted my weight to one leg
and let one go. It was not only
loud, but it smelled like a
fertilizer truck running over a
skunk in front of a garbage
dump! I took my napkin from my
lap and fanned the air around me
vigorously. Then, shifting to the
other leg, I ripped off three
more. The stink was worse than
cooked cabbage. Keeping my
ears carefully tuned to the
conversation in the other room, I
went on releasing atomic bombs
like this for another few
minutes. The pleasure was
indescribable!
Eventually the telephone
farewells signaled the end of
my freedom, so I quickly fanned
the air a few more times with my
napkin, placed it on my lap and
folded my hands back on it
feeling very relieved and
pleased with myself. My face
must have been the picture of
innocence when my husband
returned, apologizing for taking
so long.He asked me if I had
peeped through the blindfold,
and I assured him I had not. At
this point, he removed the
blindfold, and twelve dinner

lol funny doh
guests seated around the table,
with their hands to their noses!

ferhyntorlah: afam4eva,

I wonder too.

afam4eva: What sort of thread starts with "i will do my best"?

baby_123: Oro pesi je, o di hmm! Easier said than done, afterall their parents and the parents influence is still very much around. I feel so sorry for you in all this. You lost your parents, your parents love, growing up in a happy family etc. The girls mum is still alive, yes? I suggest you focus on your life. Return the girl to her mum and take care of the small boy. God help you, may we not see akoba adaba. Even in the bible, children suffer for their parents deeds one way or the other because sometimes, its hard to separate the influence of a parent on the child.

mazaje: Very true. . .The guy holding her bum is the husband. . .How can the husband be holding another girls waist?. . .

ifyalways: Why stop loving them?why should they pay or suffer for the sins of their parents?

I see no grounds or justification to hate or reject them. They're your family, all you've got left, love them!!!

Learn from your parents mistakes and that's just about that.

Sisi_Kill: @ OP
All the major parties involved are dead!! Let the issue die with them. Don't start another round of hate with your siblings.

I sincerely believe your mom would rather you are a good person with a heart of forgiveness than be her avenging angel by harboring hate for your flesh and blood.

I understand it is hard and that's why we pray for God's grace and strength.

abuchilag: We quite understand that English language is foreign to us....yes. However before you post any story meant for the public,always read through to avoid errors.

It was quite difficult understanding your write-up

Sisi_Kill: @ OP
All the major parties involved are dead!! Let the issue die with them. Don't start another round of hate with your siblings.

I sincerely believe your mom would rather you are a good person with a heart of forgiveness than be her avenging angel by harboring hate for your flesh and blood.

I understand it is hard and that's why we pray for God's grace and strength.

ludot: This is my version of the post "What Are The Dating Mistakes That Guys & Ladies Make?" found at https://www.nairaland.com/672795/what-dating-mistakes-that-guys

I hate pointing fingers and I believe it takes two tango. A friend once said, "relationships are for two people, some don't just know how to count." For me, when a relationship ends, I believe both parties should own up to the parts they played to make it crumble.

I have made several mistakes in my past relationships and I have learnt from them, one of which is being too busy with work to call or send her text messages till someone else snatched her.

Whether you are a guy or a lady, are you willing to share yours so we can learn from it?


for me i have learnt not to involve my friends too much into my love afiars, my ex and i gave a lift ride to my friend and after we got home on his way back to the car he find's telephone number written on a piece of paper, my ex ask me if i droped it i replied no i dnt remember, but i ask him softly to bring the number for me, which he refused and i also intend to call out of jelousy and i accused him too of transporting other babes so i now said to him we should call together to clear doubt, to my surprise it was my friend whome we gave ride that picked up so on and so forth........ i was really mad and felt disappointed. but she failed.

another friend of mine set me up on a date and i lost him after a bitter and huge arguments but he never belived my explanation so i let go and few months later i travelled and now i heard that the very friend has a child for him, well,well such is life and i have learnt not to tell most sweetest part to my friends i guess they do all that out of jealousy.

eghost247: 1. Attire:

They just love women in baggy and casual outfit, walking in style and tremendously beaming with confidence.
2. No make-up:

Usually men are not attracted to heavily painted girls. They love the natural and make-up free look. They rarely pay attention to smokey eyes and dark lipsticks. So ladies do not waste precious time and money and just be natural.
3. Lively wit:

It is not physical contact that can only draw men towards you. Your vivacious wit and sharp humor can do wonders in attracting men towards you. So be smart and witty. Simply crack a joke and get men wooed.
4. Lingerie:

The weirdest thing that men like is the lingerie that does not match. Do not just run after a paired bra and panties, show that you are not prepared and see how hot and desired he will be.
5. Sexy curves:

Curvy is definitely sexy. Flat and skinny figures do not attract men. Love handles and curves never fail to get noticed.
6. Intelligence:

Traits like intelligence, confidence, decisive nature, sexual openness and emotional maturity attract men as they love to be close to intelligent people rather than dumb and beautiful women. Beauty with brains is appreciated. Go ahead and flaunt your real self. Mere display of beauty is not sufficient enough. Show your sensuality and express your wildest fantasies because that is what men like.
7. Baggy tee at bedtime:

Sounds strange, but that is what men love to see a woman in. Men like women in casuals and want to explore. They do not get turned on by women in formals.
8. Eye Contact:

Never shy away from your man. Just put your point emphatically and look into his eyes. Eye contact makes you irresistible and stronger.
9. Unkempt hair:

Women think that men are attracted by properly knit hair which is not true in real sense. Unkempt hairs attract men as they simply love bed-hair and kohl smudged eyes.
10. Orgasm:

Women believe that orgasm should not be expressed before men. This is absolutely false, displaying orgasm is an indication that a woman is strong enough to express her sexuality- something that men just long for.

Sexuality is an intimate and personal thing and should be expressed instead of being bottled up.