₦airaland Forum

gloryaaa:
me wey go hide sharp sharp...I wan risk myself nd my phone

Ebayray:
It mite b true cos one of MA frnds who got admitted said uniben released d calendar today

Godwin10:
Do not trust it yet... It can't be found on uniben.edu itself...

SuperNover:
Yeah. It's an official thread on myschool.com
So it's real.

Mrmysterious:
[color=#990000][/color]
thank u much.

Ebayray:
So its less than 24 hours for it to be October that Nigeria will be celebrating her 55th Independence Day. I thought about a write up that's hilarious and I want to share it with everyone.


NIGERIA.... MY BELOVED COUNTRY
1. Where our mothers use ice cream bowls to store pepper in the fridge.
2. Where ladies don't accept flowers for valentine or birthday.
3. Where lizard go look your eyeball, nod head and say '' nothing dey happen, guy''.
4. Where a blind beggar will reject a fake naira note.
5. Where groundnuts are sold in BOTTLES and water in SATCHETS.
6. Where parents claim they always take first position in school.
7. Where you can be a driver for years without a driver's license.
8. Where government officials don't know the National anthem.
9. Where Gala and LacaSera are the best options when stuck in traffic.
10. Where you are jailed for stealing Maggi and given a chieftaincy title for stealing millions.
11. Where we fight for everything. To gain admission to university, to get a job and worse still to enter a bus!!.
12. Where you are robbed of your phone and the robbers come back for your pincode and charger.
13. Where your type of generator shows how rich you are.
14. Where you can easily blame your family members in the village for your problems.
15. Where rich men must have pot belly.
16. Where if you do anyhow, you go see anyhow.
17. Where pickpockets steal your phone from your pocket and the music will still be playing through your earphone.
18. Where generator is a social amenity.
19. Where people collect change from beggars hand.
20. Where Igbo men produce Toyota Camry jeans and Dr Dre's slippers.
21. Where the man who had no shoes was the President.
22. Where BlackBerry torch is sold in traffic for 12k!!!!!
Hahahaha....like srzly? Torch 4 12k in traffic? Where


Lolz. Join in the fun.
Feel free to add yours.



Cc:
Otibho80
RobinHez
Ray360
SuperNover
Lordkvng
QatarPlayboy
Itfreda
Sirtunechi
JayBray
SmithRussell
Swisscarter
SwagkingDope
Emodeee
Naijaboiy

BossDanniee:
UNIVERSITY OF BENIN
BENIN CITY, NIGERIA.
APPROVED 2015/2016 ACADEMIC CALENDAR
12/10/2015 - New students come into
residence for 2015/2016 session
19/10/2015 - School/Faculties/Institute/
Departmental Board of Studies
meet to consider 2014/2015 sessional results.
26/10/2015 - 30/10/2015 - Business
Committee of Senate meets to consider results
for lower level.
2/11/2015 – 6/11/2015 - Senate meets to
consider sessional results for higher levels for
2014/2015 academic session.
07/11/2015 - Old students come into
residence for 2015/2016 academic
session.
09/11/2015 - Lectures begin for 1st Semester
2015/2016 academic
Session.
18/12/2015 - Deadline for Registration and
Payment of School
Charges/Fees for 2015/2016 academic
session
21/12/2015 – 3/1/2016 - Two weeks Xmas
break
15/01/2016 - Matriculation (8 weeks after
resumption)
12/02/2016 - End of 1st Semester Lectures
for 2015/2016
15/02/2016 – 19/02/2016 - Revision (1
week)
22/02/2016 - Examinations begin in Faculties
of Education/Pharmacy/
Engineering/Life Sciences/Physical Sciences
26/02/2016 - CED Exams
27/02/2016 - General Studies Examinations
29/02/2016 – 11/03/2016 - Other Faculties
Examination begins (2 weeks)
12/03/2016 – 25/03/2016 - Students go
down for 1st Semester break (2 weeks)
2ND SEMESTER 2015/2016
26/03/2016 - Students come into residence
for 2nd semester
28/03/2016 - 2nd Semester Lectures begin
17/06/2016 - 2nd Semester lectures End

Mrmysterious:
please how much did you get the scratch card used for printing the admission letter? Did u get it at the JAMB office or a cafe? The e-facility card too, you know it's cost?

Ray360:
Uniben don't give people admission, people work for it. I feel uncomfortable when people say "Uniben gave me admission". didn't you spend nights reading voraciously for the exam? Didn't you pay up to #4,000 for the exam? didn't you spend money travelling from your residence to Benin? .

It was a competition which people won. don't undermine your efforts by saying that so casually.

good morning.

Uniben4sure:
@Adah96, gud morning. Hw are u doing?

Have u bn admitted yet?

Pls how long did it take after ur putme b4 ur results were released? I wrote my pude on the 28 and still expecting my result.

swisscarter:
Sir Godwin, i noticed that the mailing address of the registrar you used was P.M.B 1154 but on UNIBEN's website it's P.M.B 1155 and i used the former when typing my acceptance/guarantors letter...is there gonna be any problem during clearance?

Ebayray:
Ejo, sorry o. Tot it was Lost soul I've been talking to.
As in the sorrowful lines wen he was talking about Belinda of some sort dat I naw ask him if he were mourning.
Sorry!!!!

Ebayray:
Uh no, never meant it dat way. Dnt get me wrong, please!!
I meant that u should at least write bout good things n nt something that'll bring sadness, teary eyes to readers. Some people here are anxious about the second batch n u adding sorrowful lines on top of it is something else @based on ma thought

OMG!! yikes, didn't even see dat coming.
So sorry, I meant Lost soul o.
#See what sickness can cause

barnacle:
hi Godwin10, please oo want to ask- if my name is Moji Happy Obi on my WAEC cert, Moji Happy Akin on my jamb/pume n Moji Akin Happy Obi on my birth/state of origin, will i have any problem during clearace(note-Moji as surname, Happy and Obi as middle name, Akin as first name) or do you think i should get an affidavit

Ebayray:
Hmm. M happy 4 u O. Bt let ur words really portray good thing happening to you instead of lamenting at the death of a lover, it only makes u look like The poet of lamentation

Teempakguy:
haba . . . those are just a tiny fraction of what i can do nah. if i list everything eh . . . there is no way you guys will believe.

Ebayray:
Lol, abi o. Wats happening to you

Teempakguy:
Now that I think of it, I don't really have any skills.

Besides, ability to draw, to sing and play instruments, to cook. I have nothing more.

Except my poetry ability . . . rusty, yes. And my writing ability top notch.

The only skill I have is knowing how to skip.

And some other minor things.

Ebayray:
Smh diagonally. Mr. Man, are you in mourning or bereaved of ur lover?!

AlienStar:
Ok.
Optometry

itfreda:
choii...i am neither a vampire nor a witch....

Pukka36:
That's wrong!
It was morning.

Ebayray:
Hmmmmm @SuperNover, are you really sure of whatcha sayin?!

SuperNover:
I'm sorry if i have offended anyone. But why attacking me when today is not yet over?
I gave you guys my word and you're still insulting me. At least you should wait for the day to be over before resulting to insults and all.
The people typing your names are humans like you.
What makes you think I am not....

I'm done here.
Whoever wants to believe should believe.

Ebayray:
Lolz, wow. Today is historic again!!

Ebayray:
Thank God at least u a witness so dat it won't be as if I was lying. I've witnessed the Eclipse of the sun wen I was in primary school.. As I stare thru ma window, I can't even see the moon!!!!

Ebayray:
Eayah. It's raining right now o. Did you know bout the Eclipse too?! "hell no, ain't watching it. Ma Bro is

SmithRussell:
But it would've been more appropriate to use 'Aversion' or 'Strong Aversion' rather than Pet Aversion, 'cause pet aversion means something you dislike most (usually from list of things you dislike).. Unlike Aversion which simply means 'dislike'..

Ebayray:
Lol. Dearie, am fine o and you. Hws ur side. Is rain falling dere?

Ebayray:
Lol, MA dad has a pet aversion for suya