₦airaland Forum

Dyt:
You dinno give update oo

Everything they go well bro. She gave birth to a beautiful girl, she’s about 8 months now. So I met with her family, we did the DNA test and made peace and I am responsible for my daughter’s upkeep as I should. Plus I got married to my gf now my wife and I get to see my daughter every week. So far everything is fine. It feels so good to have a child to be honest

[b][/b]Good morning, thanks for all your advices. Somehow i couldn’t modify the original post but here is an update;

I was able to reach Lola yesterday on the phone, tendered my apologies on how i reacted and how things has turned out thus far, she even agreed to meet within the week for me to see her bulging stomach. Her stance was that she took the 100k to take care of herself and the pregnancy, registered for anti-natal and other necessary health obligations if that was she’s going to get from me.

She said she was never going to bother me until she has put to birth and i didn’t show up or show interest all through the period before delivery then i would have seen real madness.

Also she said her boyfriend left as she couldn’t hide the pregnancy from him and if i think this is going to cost me my relationship then i shouldn’t tell my girlfriend about it just yet as she (Lola) has not intentions of forcing marriage on me because she’s not a desperado (in her own words; she cannot manage a man so she do not want any man to manage her out of pity of situation of things to avoid domestic violence later on) so i should go ahead and marry my girlfriend.


She said she has had many disappointments in her life and this to her is a blessing, the child is her blessing and that if everybody leaves, her child is not going to leave her and many other emotional talk... (i only happen to be the scapegoat who fulfilled her cravings) She claimed she has lost many things due to this pregnancy and disappointed a lot of people, family members included but she’s going to have the child anyway. She’s even suggesting that i should tell my gf she’s a fraud that she’s trying so hard to pin this on me until i blew her cover, that’s if i already told her before. That i would not understand why it’s important that she must have the child (apparently, pastor don tell her somethings because she like church well well)

I have agreed to show minimal timely or monthly support until she delivers and carry out a DNA test, if the child is mine I’ll pay child support to the best of my ability and be in the child’s life.

As for my girlfriend i was going to marry her in August, but i have cut that out, i already to spoke an elderly family friend of ours, one she respected very well. I will break the news to her within the coming weeks (after i have seen Lola and the extend of their pregnancy) and seek forgiveness.
I will see whatever comes out of it as my fate, i probably deserve it.

For those other advises; Lola is not an option for me to marry given all that has happened, If Bae leaves of which i am having a 90% chance she will. I will spend the next couple years focusing on my career and providing for a child.

So i was thinking of informing my father, who’s my girlfriend biggest fan called him yesterday but i couldn’t even bring myself to tell him unto disappointment thing, plus i am an only son. If i tell my mom everything go just scatter, she will make trouble.

For those that think this is fictional, it isn’t. Some people make mistakes for others to learn as i have learnt from other people’s mistakes on other aspects of life. Hopefully someone will learn from mine.

Thanks again for all your words. I will keep you posted as things progresses.

Vision2045:
My guy this your matter tie wrapper o come geolock the wrapper self.

My guy advising you is tough cos you don't even know the final decision of that Lola of a girl..she can wake one day and just change her mind when the tussle and hassle of raising a child single handedly start to surface and if by then you are married to your current girl without her knowing of such incidence that can take a very bad turn.

From another perspective..what if the girl has truly terminated the pregnancy, then that may seem more safer for your relationship or marriage sake to your current girl.

I will advice you call the girl or text her, tell her u have something very urgent or lie to her that you guys have a strong family thingy that you must discuss with her..just to ascertain if she is still preggy...if that works and you meet her..two things are involve..

1 she is till preggy, (don't even bother asking her y she kept it..just accept she is having the baby)

if that is the case just open up to your financee o, let her know that all you want from that Lola is just the baby..invite your family to help pacify her as well

2. She is not preggy again...then you know what is best to do.

But no matter how it plays....remember any decision you make today..you will surely face the consequences in the future..(just like the 30seconds cum inside Lola honey-pot of yesterday is about to cost you a good girl)

I rest my case.

cc. Lalasticlala

Thanks man, I’ll do just that.

Youngkingjaey1:
This story long o

But the story sweet aha

Omo nor vex, I have been thinking of doing this since, as i dey toilet dey burn my Steven Keshi i just say make i share get some advice and also make other learn from my life mistake.

Shaiyz95:
it's too late to cry when the head is off...
u don bleep enta draw soup...
just japa from DAT compound and move in to another area...
change ur numbers and delete ur old social media accounts...she don sign d NDA so try moving on...no tell ur girl oo,na bad idea..u say u paint am a scenario n her response was scary..make ur case no go turn to Maryam own oo...

I told my girlfriend i want to move out, she nor gree o. She said she like the place and we will stay there until i complete my building which is still at the very early stages.

My concern is what my girlfriend will do to herself, if she leaves I’ll have my self to blame and move on. if i have my way i will pay child support to for the child when he/she come out after a DNA test of course. But I’ll never marry a desperate woman. I was thinking of calling Lola on another phone and set up a meeting to let her i know I’ll pay child support. But not sure if i should wait for the child to be born first or just do it today. I have been really restless for many weeks.

Brothers learn from my mistakes abeg

IcraveLove:
Please break up with your girlfriend and focus on your baby mama.

About To Lose A Good Girl. Please Help!

This might turn out to be a lengthy read, please bear with me. The bashing and insults will be unnecessary as i have already told myself hurtful things a thousand times over.

So i am 29 and have a girlfriend who’s 25 we are both graduates; she’s a nurse and i am a practicing engineer and we’ve been dating for 3+ years now and preparations are underway to tie the knot this year God willing. Something happened last year, she suggested i move to a bigger apartment so that we can start buying household items and everything necessary to start a home as we are looking to get married soon which we did; i got a bigger place, met her parents she met mine. In a nutshell everything seems to be going well, we even started a business together and set to take on the future together before the devil struck (i take blames for my actions as i am not overly religious)

Around June last year, i met a girl (very fine girl) in the new area i moved to, although i have been seeing the girl around but one day as i was driving in i saw her hiding somewhere close to my compound avoiding the rain with her friends so i took them in until the rain subsided we exchanged contacts and started texting on WhatsApp a few days later. And soon after we started having sex (protected sex), prior to that time i never cheated on my girlfriend.

The sex continued, up to 2 times a week sometimes 3 as it was relatively easy as she lived very close and my girlfriend only visits on the weekend and never sleeps out (she’s from a very good and wealthy family with proper moral upbringing). Most evenings when return from work conji just do me one kind i don cross street other times she calls until we became comfortable having unprotected sex

So late October 2019, the new girl (I’ll call her Lola) texted me that’s she’s not feeling too well and i asked her to visit the hospital to run a test to know what to treat. She came back with a pregnancy test result proving she’s already 3 weeks pregnant, i was sure it was mine but i didn’t panic as she had a bf and i have my gf we were just for the sex at least that’s what we told each other.

So i asked her to remove the pregnancy, but got the shocker when she said she’s never going to remove the pregnancy that she’s 27 and have no desire to marry me or stay with me but she’s going to have the child. Omo my heart flipped. I begged her for like 3 weeks until she got mad and stopped taking my calls, she even moved away from her apartment. So i texted her and arranged a meeting, we sat down and discussed at length but she was still bent on keeping it, i got furious and told her i am not ready to be part of the child’s life if she’s going through with it as i see no reason why she wants to have my child when she knows we are NEVER going to be together, that was when she said she had already told her family that i am not interested in the child and they support her to keep it and let the child bear their family name. I discussed the matter with two friends a boy and a girl and the asked me to let her have the child first.

One month passed fast forward to early December, Lola called 6 times i was so shocked. I couldn’t take her calls. She texted that she’s ready to terminate the pregnancy since i am wicked and unconcerned she rained all manner of derogatory words but i was only concern with her decision to let go. I called and we agreed to meet the following day, I skipped work that day and met with her and her elder sister and elder sister’s friend. The sister and her friend were so mean but i was unmoved; i don already fuckup and ready to take anything to let it all go away because the knowledge of things will destroy my girlfriend.

So Lola entered my vehicle and we drove out, on our way to the hospital for her to terminate the pregnancy plus treatment she’ll take afterwards and for the damages i have caused her. She’s going to need 150k from me, i was furious and told her i don’t have that kind of money talk less of handing it over to her for something like this (i sure don’t know what i cost but i know it’s not up to 50k). She said if i don’t give her what she want she’s going to have the baby and that i should be thankful that she’s coming up with this that if she had listen to her friends advices she would have moved to my house with all sort of troubles (she was right) but i didn’t give in just yet. I dropped her off and ask her to have the child that am not going to give her the money as i don’t have it (I get the money sha).

So two days passed, she called again and after many arguments we agreed at 100k, made her to sign a NDA not to bother me again and all, I transferred her the 100k that night, she confirmed receipt and promised to go with it the following morning and that was the last I have heard or seen or her since then, until 3 weeks ago when another of her sister called from Canada and was asking if i am Me, that she’s been seeking my contact for a while now that Lola friend had to steal the number Lola’s phone and pass it to her as Lola has been hiding my phone number from the rest of the family and she doesn’t know the arrangement i have had with her but i should know that she’s having the child, she just thought i should know that i have a child somewhere when the baby eventually drops.

Knowing fully well that i am a shitty person to have done something terrible to myself and my girlfriend and all our future plans because of cheap sex, but I’ll be a more terribly bad person to have knowledge of a child somewhere and not be in his/her life. I called Lola but she didn’t take i texted her about her sisters call she called back to know who called and was furious, she ended the call (I guess to call her sister back) and called back again in about 20mins and asked me not to ever call her line again. I replied her text she should tell her family not call me as well. I have dodged to her apartment building a coupe times but she’s not been around for weeks as i was made to believe.

So i bought a ring to engage my girl few weeks ago but had to hold first to see how things play out, i can’t go ahead and marry my girlfriend with this kind of secret untold; that will be wickedness from the pit of hell and i still don’t know how to break it to her, it will destroy her.

I jokingly painted a similar scenery to my girlfriend; her response was: she will not marry me because if she does she will kill me in my sleep. That everybody is expecting us to get married this year, she now have high respect from her family because of me and this kind of thing happens both of us will die. Omo fear catch me.

Fellow Nairalanders, this is my predicament please advice a stupid brother. Insults are welcome as I hope to pick a thing or two from your comments. MODs please push this up biko.