Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,151,591 members, 7,812,925 topics. Date: Monday, 29 April 2024 at 10:44 PM

Lashawnah's Posts

Nairaland Forum / Lashawnah's Profile / Lashawnah's Posts

(1) (of 1 pages)

Religion / Is This Inappropriate? by Lashawnah(f): 11:32am On Jan 18, 2013
Bishop Larry Trotter, a senior pastor of the Sweet Holy
Spirit Church in Chicago posted this photo of himself and
his 4year old granddaughter in a bathtub on his
Instagram page. A number of people went ham on the popular Bishop
after the photo was posted online. Many feel it's
inappropriate interactions with a minor because they
are both topless in the photo. One person wrote
No man should ever ever ever take a bath with a
female in his family or friends. That’s only for a man and his wife! This is totally inappropriate behavior!
The bishop defended himself by saying that while taking
a bubble bath, his grand daughter, who was visiting
with her parents for the weekend, came in the
bathroom and asked him if she could get in the tub. He
said yes, and it was the girl's mother who took the photograph. Is it inappropriate?

Jokes Etc / Soo Scary, A Must Read!! by Lashawnah(f): 6:26pm On Jan 06, 2013
A TRUE LIFE SAGA ! Hmmmmm! Iriri Aye!!A must read
true life mind blasting story.
We have to be prayerful, my people!!! He was dressed in white shirt that day. While he was
crossing the road to the other side to get some drinks
for his wife, a car came and hit him and he died on the
spot.
The lady lost her senses. It was only after some time
that she recovered from her shock. The funeral and cremation was the very next day because he died
horribly.
Two nights later, the lady's mother had a dream in
which she saw an old woman. The old woman told her
mother to wash the blood stains of the guy from her
daughter's dress as soon as possible. But the mother ignored the dream. The next night her father had the
same dream, he also ignored it. Then when the lady had
the same dream the next night, she woke up in fear and
told her mother about the dream.
Her mother told her to wash the clothes which have
blood stains immediately. She washed the stains but some remained.
The next night she again had the same dreams again,
washed the stains but some still remained. The same
dream was repeated the next night again and this time
the old woman gave her a last-warning to wash the
bloodstain, or else something terrible will happen. This time the lady tried her best to wash the stains, and the
clothes nearly tore, but some stains still remained. She
was very tired.
In the late evening the same day while she was alone
at home, someone knocked the door. And when she
opened the door she saw the same old woman of her dream standing at her door. She got very scared and
fainted. The old woman woke her up and gave her a
blue box, which shocked the lady. And the lady asked,
"What is this?"
The old woman replied, "New Improved Blue Omo
Washing Powder, it removes all stubborn stains!!!" I know how you are feeling now. But don't look at me
like that...I wasted 3minutes reading it too...... I also
wanna kill the person who sent it to me!!!!!!!
Entertainment / Re: An Open Letter To Tonto Dikeh From An Igbo Man By Onyeka Nwelue by Lashawnah(f): 9:57pm On Jan 04, 2013
Im your ex: Look what unemployment has caused, so a man can actually sit down and type all this r.ubbish and still waste his free Mb to post it on NL. And the mods gave it a front page just because its about Tonto Dike.
Idiot, google Mr. Onyeka Nwelue, dont be so clueless damn
Entertainment / Re: An Open Letter To Tonto Dikeh From An Igbo Man By Onyeka Nwelue by Lashawnah(f): 7:29pm On Jan 04, 2013
Gombs: Dis OP fvck up wella! ....u sure u r ibo?were u expecting us to clap for u?

After reading ur horse poo, first word dat came to my mind to describe u was CADAVER!

Anuofia ugwu awusa!
Youre very stupid, slowpoke. So, OP's gender reads a guy? Abi you dunno who Onyeka Nwelue is again?
Entertainment / An Open Letter To Tonto Dikeh From An Igbo Man By Onyeka Nwelue by Lashawnah(f): 8:20am On Jan 04, 2013
Dear Tonto Dikeh,

I know you feel beautiful this morning! Well, beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. For me, you are nowhere near ‘beautiful’. You are just there. But before I tell you what I really want to tell you, I need to tell you something. There is a lady called Adele. She is a singer. She sings. I need to explain what a singer means, because I understand that you have no brain at all. Because I hate sugar-coating, I am hated by a lot of people. You are just like me too. I will understand when people hate you, but, seriously, if you think Igbo men are nosy, then, you are right. That is your opinion and you must protect it.

I am an Igbo man. I will defend myself right now. Back to Adele. I will tell you everything about this young lady who transformed herself into something very beautiful in the eyes of men. I also understand that you don’t know her, but it won’t hurt if I tell you about her now. This is what TIME magazine wrote about her few days ago: “As talented and appealing as she is, few could foresee how utterly dominant Adele would be in 2011: in an era where even the highest-tier musical acts can struggle to move records, her sophomore effort, 21, sold 17 million copies worldwide and spent 16 weeks at the top of the Billboard 200 chart, the longest for any record since 1998's Titanic sound track. Combined with sales of her previous album, 19, Adele has topped the U.K. charts for 21 weeks — a feat matched only by the bands Oasis and Queen.” Tonto nne m, Adele is 23. You are older. She is not worried about her future. You are. She is focused about her music.

You are worried that no Igbo man will marry you after you’ve created yourself into a bamboo stick. Truth is that I don’t know you personally, but you’ve created a strong mystery around yourself. People see you as a soul from hell. They say you’ve sold your soul to the devil. Me, I don’t know where the devil lives, but I think you have. You even went ahead to show us tattoos at your back. I just didn’t understand why you did that. As an Igbo man, I will never marry a woman who has shown the entire world ‘my tattoos.’ It is not good. I am an Igbo man, so I will
need to know who snapped the picture. Maybe, your secret boyfriend? This is the reason why we are bad, abi? Adele doesn’t go around seeking attention. She doesn’t pay anyone to publish pictures of her tattoos. Who knows? She may just have a lot of them. I haven’t seen them. I have seen yours.

There is nothing wrong in you tattooing your entire body, but what is my business with that? Are you not supposed to be an actress? Of course, I understand that you appear in pornographic films now? That is good. At least, you are doing what you know best. But to pick on Igbo men? This is very unacceptable. You insulted a lot of us. This simply shows how unintelligent you are towards anthropology. Men are the same all over the world. Igbo man, Yoruba man, Hausa man. We all treat women in similar ways. We love unconditionally. And we all become nosy when our women start acting like you. If your father is an Igbo man, dearest Tonto Dikeh, you are a monkey. But I will be sorry if you didn’t say that. I only rely on the media, since I don’t know you
personally. If you didn’t say it, Tonto, I am very sorry. I will publicly apologise. Yet, I believe you did, because you do so many things after marijuana. If it’s not good for your brain, stop smoking. Listen to Adele’s Someone Like You and you will feel good.

I don’t look forward to hearing from you.

Sincerely,
Onyeka Nwelue

121 Likes

Literature / Re: Of Oral Farts And Flamboyance Stench (A HILARIOUS POEM) by Lashawnah(f): 8:22am On Dec 13, 2012
Redmosquito: Guyz dey fall my hand!
Nobody wan check this thread out! angry
lol
Literature / Re: Of Oral Farts And Flamboyance Stench (A HILARIOUS POEM) by Lashawnah(f): 8:25pm On Dec 11, 2012
Thanks everyone lol, i laugh hard whenever i have to read this poem again lol
Literature / Re: Of Oral Farts And Flamboyance Stench (A HILARIOUS POEM) by Lashawnah(f): 4:50pm On Nov 20, 2012
Redmosquito: Girl, you no try
try na attempt
you did the main the main
i love this
beautiful
I no fit write but I wan try small, hopefully the master, you, has inspired me well enough
Pretty behind
Firmly held up with adipose
Aggressively crafted with beauty
She shifts and turns in front of me
Pfff!
I catch sound of it
A lethal gas emission
The one called sbd
It lays Silent But Deadly
Like a Mamba it unfolds
So beauty does kill
I gag, my eyes swell
The queue behind me
Now as empty as my wallet
"What is the matter?" she preteniously turns to ask
I open my mouth to speak
Foolish move
More of the fumes gain access to my lungs
I fall to the cold tiled floor
The frozen hands of death pulling me to the safety of the Underworld
lwkm oga oo u don finish work
Literature / Re: Of Oral Farts And Flamboyance Stench (A HILARIOUS POEM) by Lashawnah(f): 6:22pm On Nov 18, 2012
adjain: I have to say - I'm not usually a fan of poetry, but this right here is good!

Nice one girl. Keep it up. Hard to find people with a sense of humor these days.
Thank ya
Literature / Of Oral Farts And Flamboyance Stench (A HILARIOUS POEM) by Lashawnah(f): 6:20am On Nov 18, 2012
Bank queue;
In front is matted hair
Long
Owned by a pretty face
BB-pinging, FB-picture-uplo ading Damsel
Her hair is menace to breathing
Fumes of stench
Waste away
Her boyfriend's not clever
To harness this raw source
Of insecticides My head turns
To escape the jurisdiction of stench
But behind is a worse mayhem He spoke, a fine chap
Eyes imprisoned behind eye-bottle
"Bros make I use your pen," he begged
Jeez!
The smelly hair's better! His is not mouth odour
It's oral fart!
Compost of a 7-day failed digestion
Fusing with oral manure
To form the world's latest climatic hazard
Oozing from every parting of lips Perching even on my skin Does he have a girlfriend?
Do they kiss?
Perhaps they seize their breath
When they perform their putrid mouthing
Transfer of rancid love!
Perhaps it helps decongest the worm population In their rotten bowels? I'm in the middle of a toxic world
Here you breath to live and die
Do I now need a nose mask
To withdraw lucre from my bank?

5 Likes

Politics / Re: Governor Peter Obi's Multi Billion Naira Mall In Abuja by Lashawnah(f): 7:46pm On Nov 17, 2012
Biggoozz:

BTW @ OP, where is your source? My arguemnt is on PO's CV against his acheivement and not your story. Provide a link to this story pls.
You should google it .
Politics / Re: Governor Peter Obi's Multi Billion Naira Mall In Abuja by Lashawnah(f): 7:45pm On Nov 17, 2012
Ddaji: Huge investment in Abuja at this critical time of BIAfRA struggle.Hmmm are these igbos serious about biafra or just bunch of noisemakers.mts........nonsense
My dear pls ask them !
Politics / Re: Governor Peter Obi's Multi Billion Naira Mall In Abuja by Lashawnah(f): 7:01pm On Nov 17, 2012
Ohaneze1: OP here is Peter Obi's profile, he has made real money before venturing into politics. There is virtually no Nigerian politician with this type of ground breaking profile. He is even the owner of Fidelity bank


Mr Peter Obi's Resume

EDUCATIONAL INSTITUTIONS ATTENDED:

* Christ the King College, Onitsha (W.A.S.C.)
* University of Nigeria, Nsukka, (B.A. Philosophy)
* Lagos Business School, Nigeria (Chief Executive Program)
* Harvard Business School, Boston, U.S.A. (Mid to Mid Marketing)
* London School of Economics “L.S.E” (Financial Mgt./Business Policy)
* Columbia Business School, New York U.S.A. (Marketing Management)
* Kellogg Graduate School of Management U.S.A. (Advanced Exec. Prog.)
* Institute for Management Dev. (IMD), Switzerland (Snr. Executive Forum)



PRESENT AND PAST POSITIONS

* GOVERNOR: ANAMBRA STATE OF NIGERIA
* FORMER CHAIRMAN: FIDELITY BANK PLC
* FORMER CHAIRMAN: GUARDIAN EXPRESS MORTGAGE BANK LTD
* FORMER DIRECTOR: GUARDIAN EXPRESS BANK PLC
* FORMER CHAIRMAN: FUTURE VIEW SECURITIES LIMITED
* FORMER CHAIRMAN: PAYMASTER NIGERIA LIMITED
* FORMER CHAIRMAN: NEXT INTERNATIONAL (NIGERIA) LTD
* FORMER DIRECTOR: CHAMS NIGERIA LIMITED
* FORMER CHAIRMAN: DATACORP LIMITED
* FORMER DIRECTOR: CARD CENTRE LIMITED

PROFESSIONAL ASSOCIATION/ORGANIZATIONAL MEMBERSHIP:

* Member – Nigerian Economic Summit Group (NESG)
* Member – Nigerian Chartered Institute of Bankers
* Member – Common Wealth Business Council (CBC)
* Member – West African Business Committee (WABC)
* Member – British Institute of Directors (IOD)
* Member – British Nigerian Business Council (BNBC)
* Member – Nigerian South African Chamber of Commerce (NSACC)

http://www.anambrastate.gov.ng/office-of-gov.html
Ohaneze1: OP here is Peter Obi's profile, he has made real money before venturing into politics. There is virtually no Nigerian politician with this type of ground breaking profile. He is even the owner of Fidelity bank


Mr Peter Obi's Resume

EDUCATIONAL INSTITUTIONS ATTENDED:

* Christ the King College, Onitsha (W.A.S.C.)
* University of Nigeria, Nsukka, (B.A. Philosophy)
* Lagos Business School, Nigeria (Chief Executive Program)
* Harvard Business School, Boston, U.S.A. (Mid to Mid Marketing)
* London School of Economics “L.S.E” (Financial Mgt./Business Policy)
* Columbia Business School, New York U.S.A. (Marketing Management)
* Kellogg Graduate School of Management U.S.A. (Advanced Exec. Prog.)
* Institute for Management Dev. (IMD), Switzerland (Snr. Executive Forum)



PRESENT AND PAST POSITIONS

* GOVERNOR: ANAMBRA STATE OF NIGERIA
* FORMER CHAIRMAN: FIDELITY BANK PLC
* FORMER CHAIRMAN: GUARDIAN EXPRESS MORTGAGE BANK LTD
* FORMER DIRECTOR: GUARDIAN EXPRESS BANK PLC
* FORMER CHAIRMAN: FUTURE VIEW SECURITIES LIMITED
* FORMER CHAIRMAN: PAYMASTER NIGERIA LIMITED
* FORMER CHAIRMAN: NEXT INTERNATIONAL (NIGERIA) LTD
* FORMER DIRECTOR: CHAMS NIGERIA LIMITED
* FORMER CHAIRMAN: DATACORP LIMITED
* FORMER DIRECTOR: CARD CENTRE LIMITED

PROFESSIONAL ASSOCIATION/ORGANIZATIONAL MEMBERSHIP:

* Member – Nigerian Economic Summit Group (NESG)
* Member – Nigerian Chartered Institute of Bankers
* Member – Common Wealth Business Council (CBC)
* Member – West African Business Committee (WABC)
* Member – British Institute of Directors (IOD)
* Member – British Nigerian Business Council (BNBC)
* Member – Nigerian South African Chamber of Commerce (NSACC)

http://www.anambrastate.gov.ng/office-of-gov.html
Ohaneze1: OP here is Peter Obi's profile, he has made real money before venturing into politics. There is virtually no Nigerian politician with this type of ground breaking profile. He is even the owner of Fidelity bank


Mr Peter Obi's Resume

EDUCATIONAL INSTITUTIONS ATTENDED:

* Christ the King College, Onitsha (W.A.S.C.)
* University of Nigeria, Nsukka, (B.A. Philosophy)
* Lagos Business School, Nigeria (Chief Executive Program)
* Harvard Business School, Boston, U.S.A. (Mid to Mid Marketing)
* London School of Economics “L.S.E” (Financial Mgt./Business Policy)
* Columbia Business School, New York U.S.A. (Marketing Management)
* Kellogg Graduate School of Management U.S.A. (Advanced Exec. Prog.)
* Institute for Management Dev. (IMD), Switzerland (Snr. Executive Forum)



PRESENT AND PAST POSITIONS

* GOVERNOR: ANAMBRA STATE OF NIGERIA
* FORMER CHAIRMAN: FIDELITY BANK PLC
* FORMER CHAIRMAN: GUARDIAN EXPRESS MORTGAGE BANK LTD
* FORMER DIRECTOR: GUARDIAN EXPRESS BANK PLC
* FORMER CHAIRMAN: FUTURE VIEW SECURITIES LIMITED
* FORMER CHAIRMAN: PAYMASTER NIGERIA LIMITED
* FORMER CHAIRMAN: NEXT INTERNATIONAL (NIGERIA) LTD
* FORMER DIRECTOR: CHAMS NIGERIA LIMITED
* FORMER CHAIRMAN: DATACORP LIMITED
* FORMER DIRECTOR: CARD CENTRE LIMITED

PROFESSIONAL ASSOCIATION/ORGANIZATIONAL MEMBERSHIP:

* Member – Nigerian Economic Summit Group (NESG)
* Member – Nigerian Chartered Institute of Bankers
* Member – Common Wealth Business Council (CBC)
* Member – West African Business Committee (WABC)
* Member – British Institute of Directors (IOD)
* Member – British Nigerian Business Council (BNBC)
* Member – Nigerian South African Chamber of Commerce (NSACC)

http://www.anambrastate.gov.ng/office-of-gov.html
Yea Mr, i dont doubt all of this but why abuja, There are lots of lands in both onitsha and nnewi, hes supposed to be working towards making anambra better and exposed

1 Like

Education / Re: Words You Found Difficult To Spell In Your Early School Days? by Lashawnah(f): 5:17pm On Nov 17, 2012
chic2pimp: BabaSuwe.. Don't know why though
LMAO
Politics / Governor Peter Obi's Multi Billion Naira Mall In Abuja by Lashawnah(f): 4:39pm On Nov 17, 2012
Governor Peter Obi's newly built multi billion Naira mall
in Abuja! It is reportedly the highest and most
expensive mall in the whole of Africa. This man couldn't do this for Anambra, he did this for himself and his family.. Ohh lord, What a country !

2 Likes 1 Share

Crime / Re: Aluu UNIPORT4: Lloyd Michael Buried Today In Port Harcourt by Lashawnah(f): 4:20pm On Nov 17, 2012
Rip bro.. This country sucks ! angry

(1) (of 1 pages)

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 59
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.