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Romance / Re: Why Won’t My Boyfriend Introduce Me To His Parents? by Lh2704(f): 2:57pm On Sep 06, 2020 |
BornSnner9: It’s not exactly priority for me it’s just something I find strange considering I know he holds family and family values in high regards so why am I not being introduced and integrated into his family the same way he has into mine. As he asked to meet my family which I did for him as he asked, he is now a big part of my family. So it’s just confusing for me how he has not done the same thing. When I try press onto the issue he avoids it completely and just says in time and I have to wait. He is waiting for the correct time blah blah blah. But a correct time will never come unless it is created. |
Romance / Re: Why Won’t My Boyfriend Introduce Me To His Parents? by Lh2704(f): 2:16pm On Sep 06, 2020 |
JIMMY1393: I know what his mum looks like, not his dad however cuz I’ve never spoken to him. Yes, I know his address in London I haven’t seen any pictures but he’s kind of embarrassed about his life before being in the UK, I think he feels like I’ll judge him or something. I don’t know a great deal about how his childhood was like whether he was poor or stable financial situation, nor the reason why they came to the UK; but I am slowly getting it out of him lol. And yes you are right, the majority of African men in the UK are very deceitful and do fraud. But I have found it is mostly the older men you have to keep an eye on, mainly 28+ especially if they haven’t been in the UK very long. I haven’t found a single young person that is deceitful and evil the same way the older men are, I personally have found the younger generation are more westernised a lot faster and when it comes to these kind of issues they’re non existent. It’s always the older men you find have the “secret family” or they are already set up to be wed etc lol or they just use everyone and spit them out when they have dried them up. The younger men don’t really have that kind of mindset I’ve found. It’s strange lol but yeah, with his age and how long he has been here for I don’t believe that anything like that is what he is doing but hey... anything is possible in this world. I’m just trying to wrap my head around his actions and what could be influencing them. Hearing from people that actually are from that culture is better as it presents other possibilities and how I could address the situation myself |
Romance / Re: Why Won’t My Boyfriend Introduce Me To His Parents? by Lh2704(f): 3:01pm On Sep 05, 2020 |
VampireJoe: Is that so?? |
Romance / Re: Why Won’t My Boyfriend Introduce Me To His Parents? by Lh2704(f): 10:08am On Sep 05, 2020 |
Romance / Re: Why Won’t My Boyfriend Introduce Me To His Parents? by Lh2704(f): 9:15am On Sep 05, 2020 |
Ken26: What do you mean “check your characters” & yes I know this lol. But if he isn’t acting right he’s not going to get that from me & he’s learnt that now. I’ll do what he says if he is treating me good but if he’s been a prick all day he can’t tell me nothing |
Romance / Re: Why Won’t My Boyfriend Introduce Me To His Parents? by Lh2704(f): 9:13am On Sep 05, 2020 |
Carlmax: Yes we have spoke on the phone aswell |
Romance / Re: Why Won’t My Boyfriend Introduce Me To His Parents? by Lh2704(f): 12:17am On Sep 05, 2020 |
wisest10: 1. I personally think it is because his parents have recently split and they keep fighting over who is having him... like one doesn’t want him to do things for the other does that make sense? I recently went to London and literally as soon as he got to me his dad kept calling him to come back to him and his mum kept calling him too. The only time he barely gets disturbed is when he is in my city as they know he is out of town so there is no point trying to get him to come back cuz it will take hours. 3. His excuse is “I can’t just bring u to my house and say here’s my girlfriend. It has to be a proper meeting blah blah blah” and then he goes on to say “u don’t understand our cultures are different” in which I have to tell him over and over again that we aren’t so different as I didn’t just show up to my house with him lol, it was a proper set up meeting & that I’m not clueless on his culture as I’ve been surrounded by it from young so it’s nothing new to me. Perhaps someone may be against it but he does not seem like someone who would allow that to hold him back. He takes family values and stuff very seriously like many African men do but he’s also pretty westernised too so I don’t know whether he’d allow someone to just forbid him from something do you get me? This is what I mean I’m very confused. I have tried to talk to him about it but it’s like he really doesn’t want to get into it... he just tells me to trust him and to wait. I haven’t brought it up to him in a long time but with all this stuff coming closer it’s making me second guess a bit |
Romance / Re: Why Won’t My Boyfriend Introduce Me To His Parents? by Lh2704(f): 12:06am On Sep 05, 2020 |
Ningen: Honestly I haven’t mentioned it for months now but it’s started to play on my mind as we get closer to our 1 year anniversary and the fact we are very close to signing the deal for renting a place together and living together so I’m just confused. I understand it takes time but like I said, when he asked to meet my parents I did as he asked of me |
Romance / Re: Why Won’t My Boyfriend Introduce Me To His Parents? by Lh2704(f): 12:04am On Sep 05, 2020 |
TheChameleon: Trust if you knew all the things I’ve done for this man you will see I am more than a wife. His family know the things I do for him too. Why talk about future like marriage and children if you don’t want it? People can lie true, but there are other things that say he isn’t lying about wanting these things with me but that’s what makes me confused to the introduction you see? |
Romance / Re: Why Won’t My Boyfriend Introduce Me To His Parents? by Lh2704(f): 11:55pm On Sep 04, 2020 |
TheChameleon: I don’t understand? |
Romance / Re: Why Won’t My Boyfriend Introduce Me To His Parents? by Lh2704(f): 11:16pm On Sep 04, 2020 |
Originalsly: I think that first part u may be right? Because they do live in a small flat in London but he knows that would not bother me in the slightest. He has told me some family issues but he’s very private about family stuff which I always say doesn’t make sense if he wants me to be his wife that makes me family too? I’m just very confused because he does the right things then he doesn’t, his actions speak like he wants a future then certain actions make me second guess... |
Romance / Re: Why Won’t My Boyfriend Introduce Me To His Parents? by Lh2704(f): 11:09pm On Sep 04, 2020 |
wisest10: Many time I try to leave but he always come back like I haven’t just broken up with him lol. He does everything in his power to communicate our issues and work it out between us so it’s not like he doesn’t have respect for the relationship. I always feel like he is hiding something but he always proves me wrong; I have never caught him out. His mother knows about me, we speak over text occasionally so it’s not like I am “hidden” or a secret do you get me? I just find it strange how he was so insistent on meeting my family but when I press about his he has excuse and tries to throw the “our cultures are different” card in my face |
Romance / Re: Why Won’t My Boyfriend Introduce Me To His Parents? by Lh2704(f): 11:05pm On Sep 04, 2020 |
MrOjay1: I understand the “no rush” however like I said it’s not like his mum doesn’t know of my existence, what I look like etc etc. I have met his older brother already and he approves of me from what he has said to my face so I don’t get it lol. |
Romance / Why Won’t My Boyfriend Introduce Me To His Parents? by Lh2704(f): 9:08pm On Sep 04, 2020 |
Hello, (a bit of background) I live in the UK, my boyfriend is born in Zimbabwe but half Nigerian too. He’s lived in the UK since he was around 15/16 so about 6/7 years. We have been in a relationship for nearly a year; he is very very serious about me as far as I’m aware. He is always talking about our future; marriage, children etc. We are currently looking at flats to rent so we can try and give the “living together” thing a go and then eventually buy our own house together. He always talks about our future together and how much he can’t wait to live together etc etc as right now we have a long distance relationship as he lives in London and I live 2 hours away. It’s very hard for him to get away from his family because they are constantly ringing his phone to come home to do chores etc as soon as he leaves the house. He’s a very traditional African man when it comes to family and household stuff. Anyway, considering he is so invested in our relationship and our future; he still won’t introduce me to his parents. It’s not like they do not know about my existence though however, as I have contact with his mother over text many times and she knows I am his girlfriend not just some female friend. I have met his older brother and we often all go out together and do things, so I have a good relationship with his brother. About a month into our relationship, my boyfriend was very insistent on meeting my family, so he has met my family already and often comes to my house and sits with them etc, so he has a good relationship with my mother and father. I’m just confused as to why he won’t properly introduce me to his parents as he has had many opportunities to and it’s not like I am a secret, as his mother knows of my existence, nor am I some “fling” since he is very insistent to move in and get married and have children etc. So I’m just confused as to why he won’t set it up already? I understand he can’t just bring home a girl it has to be a proper meeting but when he asked to meet my parents within 2 weeks I set up a meal and stuff and had them meet properly. Sometimes he tries to use his culture as an excuse but I have dated African men my whole life and most of my friends are African so I do understand a great deal of the culture and I have to constantly remind him I’m not clueless and he can’t try pull that card on me lol. I just really need other people’s opinion on this as I and many of my friends find it a bit weird. Thanks 5 Likes 1 Share |
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