₦airaland Forum

Honestly I don't think Nigerians have ever anticipated handover like this. Fed up of 6years of cluelessness

merbenko:
Alhaji Lai Mohammed of APC is one alarmist that
is unique in inciting Nigerians and others against
constituted authority. You are in this country,
you are a Nigerian. Tell us since independece
the time Nigeria was not in deep crisis. You and
others leaders in this country are responsible for
the crisis you are showing. Your party APC
condenmed the outgoing ruling party. Your party
didnot see anything good in them. Your party
knew the position of Nigeria before you started
giving your many promises. Stop telling story,
get set for action, we are interested in the
fulfilment of your promises, not story of our
crisis but the anticipated changes. Today's world
is full of one crisis or another, Nigeria is not an
exception. Stop frightening us. We want problem
stoppers not alarmists. Action! Action!! Action!!

We as citizens deserve to know how much debt the government has incurred and what it used it for. Thank you APC to sharing light on all the stealing GEJ and his cronies have down. History will forever judge GEJ, he is not only clueless but also wicked and greedy. All that money on Aso Villa despite the ridiculous feeding allowance in a country where many go to bed hungry is very evil.

chibic:
apologies for the way i went about it. I was misguided by what I witness everyday. Your dad is really something else. Smh.. I wish you goodluck and GOD's blessings in your marriage!!

Apology accepted . Thanks and Amen , goodluck to you too

chibic:
with this type of hatred for your father after more than two decades, your man must be dam.n scared of you. What story will you tell your children? That your father seperated from your mom and your mom took you people away from him, and he never bothered to come see you? Do you even know if your mom lied to you guys? Have you heard his own story? No matter what the sins of my parents are, I can't have much hatred/grudge against any of them for this long. I need to be a rolemodel to my kids and not teach them how to pay their parents back for their sins.

Abeg why not ask for the whole story before you rush to conclusions. He asked my mother to take us with her, that was his wish.my siblings met with him when we were teenagers ( I was in school) and he never denied telling her to take us and he also admitted that he knew where we lived all along and never tried to see us.we lived in a small town so he knew our house and our schools. He was drunk and womanizer who felt that he had better things to use his money for , he got fed up of the responsibility. Basically he told them straight up that he realized he wasn't cut out to be a father. After that day they left contact details for him and he still never bothered to call or look for us. So I should go and bring someone who's said he doesn't want to be a father to my wedding Or I should go kneel I front of his house and beg for him to care Look for ko, look for ni

By the way I have never hated him,he simply doesn't exist since he made his choice. It's not a grudge but simply realizing some people should never have been fathers or mothers and you move on with your life. You guys here always want to same it must have been the woman who hid the kids well in this case he was the one who was too selfish to care.

He actually said he didn't have a problem with my Mum,just wanted to enjoy his life and felt a wife and kids were cramping his style.

Funny enough he had 2 kids outside and did the same to those ones to,abandoned them and never paid a dime towards their care. Just irresponsible and as a good role model to my kids I refuse to have a negative influence around my family

Goodnight people.

Word of advice to everyone who frequents this section, one can have civilized discussions even when you have opposing views without insults. The trend of making personal attacks to those with an opposing view is very childish

njokusboy:
This is the second time youare saying this...

The first sentence on his post stated that " women saying women were their worst enemies" was a misogynistic and sexist remark invented by men... imagine the contradiction, the thoughtlessness and crude stoopidity...
A man is responsible for statements women make...
That is like blaming the igbos for the hutu rampage

That's like women coming here and saying it was an attack because the OP said women are their own worst enemies Instead most of the females came in and simply said if they agreed or not and gave reasons but they didn't act like it was an attack because it's simply a point of view just like his. the men should have simply explained why they think it wasn't men who started the saying. He said it was a sexist remark and explained why, then those who disagreed should have simply said why they didn't think so instead they started insulting him The problem is a lot of people here simply cannot have mature conversations devoid of insults. Any view contrary to theirs is seen as a attack

pickabeau1:
still missing the point
you ladies should take achil pill and review the thread

the OP mentioned is there any reason why WHY WOMEN SAY THEY ARE EACH OTHER'S ENEMIES not men saying this

the traits of backstabbing etc are not female but human traits..

you know what.. you win

Then the he pointed out the fact that both sexes are actually that way just that women tend to be judged more harshly. In what way was that an attack on men

Is his crime the fact that he chose make the discussion boarder and fairer saying it's a human problem

pickabeau1:
once again you ladies miss the point

this thread.. you're the Op was about women castigating women.

Frances brought men in it and it was duly obliged

So once someone turns the spotlight on men then it's a problem Yet on threads talking about a woman getting beaten by her husband , husband cheating or such Nl men always turn it around and talk about how the women are verbally abusive too and blah blah, yet you have no problem with that. Does that mean if one is discussing one of the sexes now one must never use the other sex as a point of reference is that across broad or only a problem when it's perceived not to favour men

bukatyne:
This was Francis' :first post on This topic.

Are you referring to the bolded?

And who were the ladies which jumped on his post to insult men?



Well, It's not a gender thing but depends on individuals.
Our society isn't nice towards feminine gender

Gbam, he was simply pointing out that both sexes are guilty yet only women get labelled . That's not bashing but rather an objective assessment

pickabeau1:
the problem on this thread started when Francestony called men hypocrites for being the reason women call each other their own enemies
some female posters jumped on this and started the male bashing

why can't some females be objective

There's nothing wrong with what he said, it wasn't an attack on any one man it was just a generally observation about the hypocrisy involving the issue. The same way if the thread was about people saying blacks are the problems of each other you wouldn't have had a problem with pointing out the fact that whites also pull each other down so it's unfair to label one group when in fact it's a general human problem. He was simply analyzing where the statement came from and how fair or accurate it really is. That not an attack on anyone

VictoriaBee:
Says a bloody hideous hypocrite that attacked cococandy without an altercation, wishing her evils in marriage.
You are an old hag, hence your hate.

You are a pretentious devilish being.

I also dare you to upload your face.

Normally I would say that's too much however I can't stand hypocrites , so I understand your irritation

Goodboiyy:
lolz,, not yet married, don't even wanna see him, point of correction he his nt my father jst 1 fool... u don't know what it is to have a father tat denied u every right to life,, let's b fair here, if u re d 1 will u Accept d man as ur dad?, e knows our family compound, I don't care abt him, jst trying to send msg to the Op

I really admire ladies, I jst hope d OP figure out a way to resolve this issue, bt divorce ain't a good solution

Reminds me of my biologically father and that crap about the children looking for their father no matter if he deserted them is a lie. I certainly never looked for him and when I got married I simply let my I laws no the man was never a part of my life and didn't deserve to be a part of my successes and celebrations . I don't hate or resent him, I just feel nothing for him

Goodboiyy:
hi , can I share my story wit u, similar with yours, bt mine happened 21yrs ago around 1993-95 then I was a little kid , My mom and dad had little quarrel and my dad chase her out( The first tin my mom did was to take us along, thou it wasn't easy, cous we were d senior children of d foolish man) 1 tin u need to know my dear, is tat been a single lady is nt easy, av seen tins, suffered, Bt what kept us alive was determination, MEN don't care abt there children 90% of men re useless wen it comes to training up a child,.. So after two yrs in lagos my mom relocated to my state(Delta). so we settled there, we did it without my dad knowing, cous e threathen e will deal with my mom if e take us away (Lolz trust warri boiz, u can't com to our family compound to touch my mom, that day d man go die)... My mom charged him to court, all 4 d sake of taking us away from him (ILoVEMyMOM) so we relocated to warri, sist it wasn't easy 4 my mom, I am telling u this cous I was once like your child 20yrs ago, and I know what it takes to b a single lady/parent, thou our my mom family is somehow rich bt they took care of us for jst two yrs, 1 thing you need to know in life is that Everybody has his/her responsibility ,,,and after that my mom was d only one that did d rest.. so d game was open 4 my mom alone, she withdrew us from Private school and enrolled me in Public School (beginning of struggle, all this while my dad never cared to called , till now i neva eat e 1kobo , I don't care about him, am jst gratefull to God my mom never left us with DAT evil man, ). my mom being an educated woman. she Did all her possible best we were educated..

I never supported Divorce cous it affected me psychologically, emotionaly, madam if u can find any way to reconcile do it, bt know marriage is nt a do or die affair, the tin u will regret doing is leaving your child in d hands of 1 man, Nah nah, tell him u want your child, if e says No, drag him to court. , don't b afraid, u re doing this for your SON, men don't care , Am telling u cous am 1 of those child tat suffered Breakups, e will end up marrying another lady, and guess wat, she will 8 ur child, get a good paying job, Rent an apartment, do all possible means to av u child with u, b focus, Pray, Ask for help, let Ur baby know you luv him,

To all d single PArents (women) out deer, I luv u. Mothers gave me life,,my mom always inculcate in me never to disrespect any lady,. (Gonna treat my woman like a queen)

Gbam, most men that collect the kids in this environment do it to "punish" the woman. He will end up passing the kids to a house gal or female family member to raise.

Those talking about her leaving the children till now, won't she get a house first and have an environment where the children can be. If it's a typical Nigerian situation even if she contributed financially in the house the woman will be the one who has to move out. She'll probably have had to stay with friends or relatives before she can save to get a place. Those people who housed her will probably not want her bringing extra mouths along. So yes there are practical reasons why she may not have been in a position to have the children stay over till now.

That doesn't make her irresponsible but rather admirable.

No one gave the man custody of the kids so he has no right to be making rules. Abeg find a lawyer who will take you case pro bono. Yes you I'll pay for your children's welfare but the man had no right to determine how much. The court will be fairer to both parties, at the end of the day it's in the best interest of the children for them to have access to both their parents and the man must not deprive them of that because of malice

Wow, that's a great recognition

Emaprince:
This woman have evaded so many questions here. Like; the cause of the seperation. I'm sure everything going wrong right now will be her fault. She only came here to tell a one-sided story which even shows how she really don't care living without her kids untill the women here started blaming her for being that way. Guilty conscience is making you claim you have no problem leaving them with their dad.

You were a responsible mom? I doubt if you were a responsible wife!

Your husband is definitely angry and wanted to punish you for something bad you did(which you are hiding). Women do this also to their husbands when the have the kids in their custody. Especially when they were hurt by their hubbies.

Will that make it right? As she rightly said the reason for her divorce is irrelevant except if he can say she's violent or something that affects the kids. Being an bad spouse does not necessarily translate into being an irresponsible parent. Let's say she cheated , so? If the children are taken away from every cheat how many fathers will have access to their kids he marriage is not under debate here, what ever happened she's decided to move on and he has no right to use her children to "punish" her. Same with the women that do the same, the only thing that is relevant when discussing child custody is what's in the best interest of the children and not the injured ego of the parents.

That is why a court is usually in the best position to determine because the judge is not deciding based on emotions

bukatyne:
Did you do a secret survey to know the posters who liked a post?

Who are the evil ones? Women? Are you exempt from This evil?

I was going to ask if there's now a way to know who liked what very ridiculous

This issue is just the same way people are always quick to say Nigerians are their own worst enemies, blacks are their own worst enemies .....

Maybe it's simply a case of Human beings are their own worst enemies

VictoriaBee:
Same way you all bounced on that dude, francis.

Example of men being there worst enemy.

Don't mind the hypocrites

FrancisTony:
Women are their worst enemy is a "chauvinistic/sexist phrase", as MEN are equally their own enemy.

Human rebellion, frailties, imperfection etc is mostly emphasized on, when it's towards female gender.

I agree that women are their worst enemy but I can still give you many instances of men being their own worst enemy.
Nobody would deny that he/she hasn't seen any man envious of his friend's success - politicians comes to my mind.

For example - If Omotola is having a little misunderstanding with Genevieve, the phrase pops up; but when the role is reversed e.g Davido versus Wizkid, tone would change that they are kids instead of men are their worst enemy.
Even on Nairaland, as a female, don't go on threads about successful female celebrities hating, as you'll be bashed with that phrase but MEN are free to hate on male celebrities. Hypocrisy!

Well, It's not a gender thing but depends on individuals.
Our society isn't nice towards feminine gender.

This is a real eye opener. It's so true, male bosses are nasty to their junior male colleagues all the time while sometimes giving more advantage to the females yet no one says men are their own worst enemies in such instances. Typically more envy exists between the same gender

plaetton:
In disputes of any kind, one side of the story is clearly not enough to start dishing out remedies. A counselor would first hear both sides of the story before recommending appropriate action.
Yes, the man might just be a real jerk, or, ...something else might be pushing him to these drastic measures.

That's what courts are for, to hear the 2sides and come up with a judgement that will be in the best interest of the children

SAMBARRY:
In that case she should give up and move on with her life .I know it's not easy taking your mind off your children. I know how it feels. It's very painful because putting myself in the woman's shoes I'll rather prefer they take everything away from me than my daughter . but when the children that he's hiding from her grow up they'll be the ones looking for their mother. After all they won't remain kids forever. More importantly she should pray and fast for things to get better

Did you really say she should leave her children and move on and they will look for her when they are older what type of mother or even responsible father would do that. Do you think those children will forgive her knowing she didn't fight for them How does a mother move on without having access to her kids she says the man is abusive, what if he starts Abusing the kids emotionally or otherwise? What if he marries a woman who does that? So many things can happen to the children when she has no access to them. What kind of stupid life will she be moving on to not knowing how safe her children are even if they are safe, what about all the years of their mothers love and nurture they would have missed?

@OP, please call the lawyer who has offered to help and fight for your kids. Even if you don't have the means to have them full time now at least you'll ensure you get visitation rights and they spend some holidays with you. Your children need you, concerning financial contribution the courts will decide how much you should each contribute depending on your incomes.

Lol I thought APC is the one they call northern party

Good, you don't continually rape someone and not expect for her to crack one day and deal with her rapist( pervert husband)

Good for him

Good, Nigeria is in dir need of that money since they've almost emptied the treasury

Ikengawo:
90% of the people that read this article don't know that even to start a small business a man needs to go into debt.

Hypocrite , you Tanoids were always criticizing Fashola for taking loans but now it's GEJ it's okay abi. If you say Fashola didn't use it for anything tangible we can all testify that GEJ did even worse

shugacaneman:
JONA and MAMA P wetted Nigeria abi? Dont die in this ur poverty......recieve sense.

The guy is a known retard, he has refused to receive sense

muh4lyf:
Haba! I am sure you are a graduate.. If he said it's was a fraud does he mean it doesn't exist.. Kai! It might exist but the fund might not be used for the purpose for which it is meant for,so if that's the case,please tell me what is SURE P,it's a FRAUD

Gbam. I don't understand why it's so hard for some people to reason. He said it's a fraud because the way the funds is spent is not according to the stipulated purpose

Eshinwaju:
I remember pdp claiming apc was tribalist.....but here is the man paying respects to his predecessors irrespective of tribe.... ....pdp also claimed Muslims were dominating Lagos but......this man is Christian.....pdp played tribal and religious politics and were correctly trounced...

Gbam

Pdp's politics of division is disgusting.