₦airaland Forum

My daughter (Primary 2) came back from school and I asked what of her assignment, She said her teacher asked them to write on "Who is Evans?". That they will present tomorrow.

I called the teacher to understand why such an assignment, because I feel it is of no relevance to the positive growth of my child and this man had the guts to tell me that I don't have the right to question what he teaches in his class.

Mamalettes, how do I handle this matter? I am boiling seriously. Did I commit a crime by asking the teacher?

https://www.facebook.com/MamaletteNG/posts/1438247879596325

I’m a good Christian and I know what the Bible says about forgiveness and my pastor is always also there to remind us of how to forgive those that have wronged us but my point is how do I forgive someone that has not accepted his wrongs? I’ve been married to my husband for the past 5 years now and our relationship was built on trust.



I have never found him wanting and neither has he found me in any awkward situation. All the trust I had in him started to diminish in our third year of marriage. It started when my husband became social media savvy, he wants to be on every social media app and I wonder what his obsession over social media is for. At first, I thought it has to do with his job but the way he goes on about it made it suspicious to me but I didn’t put much thought to it.

It became more glaring when he started passwording his phone and when I confronted him why he did that, he gave the excuse that it’s because the kids usually play with his phone and end up calling up random numbers, he gave me the password to it and I felt he might be right after all since I complained about the same thing to him. On a particular day, he was fast asleep and I needed to get a number from his phone. I decided not to disturb him and typed in the password only for the phone to say it’s incorrect. I woke him up to tell him what I found out and he claimed I must have typed in the password wrongly and he quickly collected the phone from me and read out the number I needed to me and that was the last encounter I had with that phone.

It became a precious jewel that my husband tucks underneath his pillow and place his head on it and whenever you try to reach for the pillow, no matter how fast asleep he his, he will jolt out of his sleep like he saw a ghost and the first thing he will start looking for it his phone! His actions were too suspicious and glaring he has something he’s hiding from me and it’s in his phone, so I made up my mind to know what that thing might be. On the day I found out, he forgot to take his phone to the bathroom with him like he always does and I entered the password I had saw him entered into his phone when he thought no one was watching and the phone opened.

My husband was not just cheating with one person but several girls that he has been meeting up with in hotels around his workplace and even the ones five streets away from our place. I was all his bank statement too, he has been generous enough with all of these girls, he goes out of his ways to impress them by spoiling them with gifts and cash. I locked the door when I heard him approaching and from the transparent door, he can see me his phone reading all of his sexcapades and I can’t believe it’s the same husband that I married, he sounded like a different person from the kind of texts he sent out to these girls, I’ve never seen that side of him.


I got tired of reading because the list was endless and I was sick to my stomach that I can’t believe he would ever hurt me like this. I opened the door and he was trying to apologize to me claiming it was the devil’s handiwork, I hated his presence and the thought of living with him disgusts me. He went to report himself to our pastor to beg me on his behalf, we went for counseling and he promised to turn a new leaf. He did turn a new leaf for just a MONTH!. He was back to his old ways again and whenever I confront him about it, he either lies to my face but when I give him evidence of his philandering ways, he will quickly start apologizing and claims it’s the devil.

All of these has been going on repeatedly in my marriage that I’m even tired of reporting him to the pastor, it has now become a norm for him to cheat on me in our marriage and whenever I confront him, on some days, he will apologise and promise to become a better person and on some days, he will say I’m just being insecure and I’m only assuming all of this in my head like a crazy person. He was right about one thing though, his cheating ways is truly driving me crazy because I don’t think I can ever forgive him for how much he has hurt me.

Is There A Way To Forgive Someone That Constantly Wrongs You?

As mothers we have learnt a lot and still have a lot to learn, people will give you loads of advice on different topics, you might find some of those advice useful while others are plainly useless.

Beyond all these lessons there are a lot more deep lessons that we all need to learn ourselves, we need to know when to stand up and fight and when to give in and let go. We need to learn that sometimes, giving in doesn’t mean you are weak, there are times it takes strength to do so.



Below are other lessons I’ve learnt in the 15 years of my marriage and the things every mother need to know;

Every mother should know that there are times things will be beyond her control, she’d be confused as to what to do and nothing she tries will work. That doesn’t make you a failure mother, it only means you’re human.



Every mother should realise that yes, motherhood is beautiful but you might not enjoy every moment of it. So if you find yourself counting days until you stop breastfeeding, if you find yourself wishing your child would grow up quickly, that doesn’t make you a horrible, ungrateful mother.


Know when to quit and say enough is enough in a situation even though people might have negative things to say, only you know what you’re going through, you know when you can’t take anymore of it, and you alone know when you’re too tired to keep trying.



I need you to know that if you keep looking at society and what they would say you’ll not live, you’ll only live for people, forget what people will say, ignore criticism you and only you know what’s good for you.



Treat yourself nice because you’d be treated like trash if you treat yourself like one. Don’t let the society, your spouse or anyone push you over and get away with it because immediately they do it once and it worked they’d trample on you over and over again.

Mother, I’d like you to know that you’d encounter hardships in life, there would be days when you’ll wish the day should just be over so another new day and new chapter of your life can be opened, on such days, hold on, and remind yourself that it won’t always be like this. Sorrow endure for just a night but surely joy comes in the morning…

Listen to your inner voice always, I call it instinct and we as women were all born with it. When it tells you to avoid a situation, do something, avoid some people or stay calm, listen, so you don’t regret it.



When you are given advice, listen and hear them politely but do as you please, you don’t have to argue with people all the time because sometimes silence is golden.



Don’t try to be the super-hero mom, I haven’t seen any such that survived it, don’t take everything on yourself, people are there waiting for you to ask for help so they can offer it.

And when you are feeling low because times like that will come when the cloak of sadness will cover your being, find ways to cope with these feelings until it blow over like the wind.

You probably know this already but I’d say it again, when taking care of your family and kids ensure you take care of yourself too so that you can always be there to do your duty as a wife and mother. Those who never take a moment to focus on themselves aren’t always there to finish the journey they started.

Seek to gain respect from your husband and children always, from you, your children should learn the strength of a woman, and learn that women are not push-overs.

And whatever you do, whatever your imperfections are, whatever your body issues are, your children, yes your children love your imperfection perfectly and will never switch you with any other.

In their eyes you can do no wrong for you are enough, and always will be enough for your children …..

10 Things All Mothers Need To Know

Parents! There are some things you shouldn’t allow your sons to do, while you might think it won’t have a long term effect on them, you are wrong! We all should endeavour to bring up thoughtful, helpful and sweet boys that’ll become gentlemen,and to achieve that, below are some things we should never allow them to do.

Never allow your son do these things;



1. Run away from household Chores

The reason why so many men find it hard to help their wives with chores at home is because they’ve been brought up to believe that house chores is for girls only. Encourage your boys to do chores, when you’re cooking let them be in the kitchen with you, let them sweep the floor and wash plates. That way they won’t grow up to see women as inferior.

2. Hide their emotions

It’s common to believe that men shouldn’t show emotions “boys don’t cry” and such comments are thrown at boys. Encourage your boys to show their emotions but teach them how to control their anger.

3. Quit having interest in non-boyish activities

Some activities are considered girly and as such parents often discourage their boys from doing them, this is wrong. If your boy prefers to attend a dance class instead of playing soccer so be it. Let your child follow his passion.

4. Avoid being friends with the opposite sex

If your child wants to be friends with a girl, what’s wrong with that?It’s okay for them to want to be friends with girls, it shows they are normal don’t plant negative seeds in their head by rejecting.


5. Stay away from dangerous sports

If you are the protective parent that wants your child to play safe all the time, you’re killing his spirit. If your child wants to do something fun as long as it’s suitable for his age, let him. It will both strengthen him and make him discover his strength and weakness.

6. Disrespect the opposite sex

Boys when they are in groups often find making fun of girls very funny, if you encounter boys doing such tell your child never to engage in such, teach your child to respect every one, including girls.

Never let your child do the above things, they will grow up to become men tomorrow, what kind of men will they become? A source of happiness to their parents and wife? or a menace to the society, their parents and wife (God forbid!)?

You have the power to bring them up into either, pick wisely!

Never Allow Your Son To Do These Things

yusufu16:
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