₦airaland Forum

After all that happened, though it all. Am only what i am by His grace. She started war when i wanted to get married, she wanted me down so bad.

I told my husband all when i got married.

I have forgiven my Dad cos he is a changed man. He was sorry for all he did to me. He even apologized to me. But my mother is not a changed person. She looks for every oportumity to hurt me. She told my younger ones lies i can not even imagine. The city we a live now is through my influence, they all lived with me before setting out for their own place. I forgot all she did and sens her money but she's not changed at all.

Presently she cant even walk, she is seriously sick. But if you hear what she is saying to people about me, i just wonder how i have wronged her. I dont ever steal her things when i was living with her. I am born again, i fear God. I always pray and wish for a good relationship with her but she's not changed. She doesnt like my husband, she doesnt know my kids.

For over two years now i have not called her, she doesn't call as well. She left our house two years ago. I was told she looked older than my granma now. She cant walk.

I just totally cut off from her but just this morning am thinking of trying to locate her. Am better without her, i told myself nothing will make me call or look for her but am begining to think again as a Christian.

If i continue this way, will i make rapture? I have prayed about it so many times but God hasn't really said anything as regards my offline with her, however, I have heard Him tell me to forgive them. I usually cry in pain, until one day i heard a voice, you cant continue this way, forgive!!!. I was relieved since then, i now can pray for her to be healed. I pray daily for her.

But if i refused to call her, will i make heaven?

I had to be detailed so anyone patience enough to read my story can give the best and matured Christian advise.

Thanks.

In it, I meet Christ, I started praying, whenever the house is too hot i run to church. Joined choir and other activities in church.

My favourite hymn became

What a friend we have in Jesus
Becuase He lives I can face tomorrow
Sweet hour of Prayer

My only hope was just on God to help me make it in life. They never believed in me. During my two years of agony waiting for admision my mum told me several unprintable things, my enemies cant go further, they cant make it in life.

When my grannies complain am lazy, hmmm for a child who will fry three basins of gari at 11 years is lazy? I started frying garri when i was 7 years, go to farm, return and fry garri. Mama also have other business she does so i am always busy as a child.

I finally gained admission and thought oh all is over buy i lie. My mother even said she was told by a prophet am a witch, even my Dad. At 21 I was still on low cut, i mean omolo cut. When i cut my hair, he must not see one single hair on my head at 21. I always cut my hair on time before resumption so i wont go to school with the same of skin cut.

When i finally got admision, her story change, how will you make it, is this how you will escape? One early morning i greeted her and she refused to answer. Haaa, trouble has started again. God have mercy. Later in the evening she told what i did wrong - i had a dream that you ....... for the sake of online i will not mention the dream. I became happy. You sure you that dream and she said yes. I laughed and was happy thanking God. She flared up, started cursing holding her two breast. And i ran into the house to carry my bible. My pastor had preached and said, when you are being cursed opening stand to rebuke it, dont go hide and start asking God to help you rebuke it.

So i challenged her, in the name of Jesus Christ, ypu can never place a curse on me, Jabez was named Jabez by his mother, but he knew the God of Israel, and his life change he cried to God and his life changed, you cant change my destiny. I faced her that day with courage. She has being cursing before then. I dont stop there, i told my dad all that happened when he came and he compelled her to bless me and reverse all the curse. She coundnt say antything i did wrong. Nothing.

But I trust, Mama n Baba never told them I see boys, i know they formulate other lies like am lazy, I disobey buy not fornicating cos I never used to go out and sent on errand i returned quickly.

My siblings steal alot, instead of them to investigate, I will be beaten, starved. They praise them, they dont lie, dont steal. Infact they will say to my face, i will take this, you will soon die when daddy returns cos they will belive you did it. There is no way i can defend i dont do it, i get beaten more for trying to defend myself. In all I finished my secondary school and gained admission to university.

Listen, if I say I dont do more work to catch up educationally i lie, i had to read, study hard to catch up with my other class mates. My first term result was so poor that I was told if there is no improvement i might be asked to withdraw. So i read. Before next term result came i passed through hell, my parent dont understand i just joined the school and needs time to catch.

So i finished my secondary school. Before gaining admission i stayed at home for two sorrowful years. Those years i thought of suicide.

One particular Christmas Holiday I was lucky to travel to visit them and spend my holiday with them. Heennn, opportunity, no going back. I must remain here to start my schooling here. I must be like those children i watch on tv. I must this I must that. I was only about 13 years old then. I asked my Dad of truly he is my Dad and He affirmed in positive. Told me how it all started, why I started living with granma.

Without thinking again, I said 'I want to change my school, I need a better school, they dont teach well in my school'. My Dad love a child who is serious and can spend his last cash on such. He dont even think about it, he said okay. But 'how do I convince mama now?' You will need to go back after this holiday and then I will look for how to tender it before mama before bringing you.

Na so drama for my life started till today. That's about 23 years ago! To cut all other stories shot, i was enrolled in a boarding school and the regret started. Wasn't given provisions to school, my provisions were gari and kulikuli whereas my siblings in other boarding school go to school with double double of each set of beverages, i mean assorted. My uniform sef na one. Until the school mandated them to get me another. My house wear was so big that instead of my mum to use the yards to sew two she sew one that I usually use to sweep the whole path i thread whenever I wear it. You shouldn't be wearing anything that will show your shape was her excuse.

Me village girl, show my shape, do I have a shape? I just needed something fitting like other children in my school. Ashawoooo, Mama and Baba said it, that you have been used and dumbed by so many men. See beating. I dont even know what it means for a boy to touch a girl sef then, i was just 14 years! Naive, all I wanted was good school but not this please, I said to my self.

One day, one of our distance relations called me and said 'do you know Mama and Baba are not your parent?', huh, what do you mean? I will tell mama, shuuuuu, please dont tell her or anyone. I just wanted you to know.

I know how to quietly observe things from whe I was young. Oh, is that why they will formulate lies and I will be badly beaten when they come? But why dont they show me love? Why am I the only one out of their children not living with them? I was asking myself so many question no one can answer. I couldn't even ask Mama cos them mo born ypu well to ask some kind of questions. So I kept observing.

One day one of my uncles wive insulted me and said ' idiot, you are here in the village whereas your siblings are in the city enjoying' haaa again? Whenever they come around I started observing how they truly looked better. And I started thinking, I can decide to join them and my dream of attending FGGC or a better school will become a reality. So I thought but I never knew I was going to experience the worst any child in this world can experience living with his/her parent.

I am an old member on nl however i decided to use a new moniker for the sake of anonimity.

It might be a little bit lengthy but i need heaven bound Christians to advise me.

Just this morning i prayed and thought to reconcile with my mum. I have cut off from her over two years ago.

How it all began!

I lived with my grannies when i was young, i was told i wasn't even upto a year old when I started living with her in my father's village. So i grew up not knowing mu parent as parent not even knowing my siblings as we are from same parent. Whenever they come around to the village i call my Dad Oga, my mum as Oga's wife. I cant even think they were my parent then cos their visit was always a nightmare to me. My grannies will formulate lies, speak evil of me and i will be beaten like to the point i getting wounds all over my body.

As a little child in the village, I always wanted the best education a child in the world can get, I read alot, not to give myself some praise, I always top the class. However, I became worrried whe one day I heard someone said 'the best child academically in the village is the least in the city'. Haaa, so I am not even way near those in the city, how will I get to compete with them, thats was all my thought. One day I called my granma, mama I dont like this school again, I want to go to FGGC ...... mama rebuked me.