Mutendiwashe's Posts

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Family › Re: Could My Wife Be Cheating? by Mutendiwashe(f): 11:48pm On Jul 12, 2015

bigfly:
Yes, I think marriage is meant for kindergarten kids otherwise no sane adult will justify cheating in any form for any reason.

who slept with who?

Family › Re: Could My Wife Be Cheating? by Mutendiwashe(f): 11:45pm On Jul 12, 2015

emmatok:
Some couples don't use the Ring at all , due to their religious beliefs.

if it were for religious purpose they would both not have rings in the first place. Again this doesnt apply to this case.

When the husband notice his wife is not wearing her ring he asked why .
And the wife too should have asked why he removed his ring in the first place, instead of reacting by removing her ring.

She is trying to justify her selfish actions, by claiming the husband is doing the same.

So if I'd the husband sleeps around, she was will do the same.

If the husband eats out, she'll do the same.

Marriage don't work like that.

last time i checked marriage doesnt work on doing something knowing well it is not right and expecting positive results to yield from it either.

Family › Re: Could My Wife Be Cheating? by Mutendiwashe(f): 11:34pm On Jul 12, 2015

bigfly:
I still stand on my words go and read her response and you will see that she knows she made a mistake.
Let start dissenting it, her ex called, her husband foolishly called his ex instead of setting a strict boundaries.
Her husband stops wearing his ring but she wore it out to office but removed it later and keeps it in d car.
She saved William with 4 alpabets a year b4 ring issue.
Now estate dude, food and lies to cover up.

if you pick up your stranded ex and later on find out that your wife would have been against it, you think the most mature thing for her to do is put divorce or seperation on her mind?

No doubt the husband has his own share of wrong doing, but let's call a spade a spade.

and the best thing to do it vow for better or worse on the alter and divorce because of how a number was saved or a cooked meal? Why do people waste their time getting married if they are not ready to keep their vows when a challenge comes their way? Please do give me a good reason.

Family › Re: Could My Wife Be Cheating? by Mutendiwashe(f): 11:17pm On Jul 12, 2015

emmatok:
You probably don't know that son couples don't use wedding Ring.
Way some stop useing due to medical issues.

So the ring is not the issue here .

The couple are no longer comfortable with each.

Medical reasons a wife is not informed of before removal of the ring?
Couples that dont use wedding rings usually choose to do so after mutual agreement, which is not the case here.

Family › Re: Could My Wife Be Cheating? by Mutendiwashe(f): 11:14pm On Jul 12, 2015

bigfly:
I can ignore a message while I still communicate with a coded phone number.

you can read so much meaning into how a phone number is saved but see nothing with removing a wedding ring a year into the marriage without consulting or informing your wife? Im sure marriage these days is now meant for kindergarten kids not adults.

Family › Re: Could My Wife Be Cheating? by Mutendiwashe(f): 11:10pm On Jul 12, 2015

bigfly:
Madam did u read the husband's complain and the wife's response at all, the woman never complained about ring until her husband caught with ring hidden in the compartment, she said her husband stops wearing a months ago, husband said she save ex number with code on the phone she abandoned over a year ago.

Lets get this straight, removing a wedding ring without giving a valid reason for it prior or after removal is a trivial issue but an ex's number saved in an old phone that has not been in use for a while is bigger than murder?

Pls read her response very, it is clear her husband started misbehaving immediately her ex came in. That is why she said she now know why d man has been mean to her.

what you are saying is he can play tit for tat if she does something wrong, i.e. misbehave but if he does something wrong she has to be react differently?

Family › Re: Could My Wife Be Cheating? by Mutendiwashe(f): 10:55pm On Jul 12, 2015

bigfly:
Don't mind them, they were just looking for excuse for her.
Does wearing wedding ring made her starts communication with her ex?
Does wearing wedding ring made her saved ex phone number with code?
Does wearing wedding ring made her to start befriending neighbours against her husband wish?
Does wearing wedding ring made her to cook for married male neighbour and lied to her husband about it?
Does wearing wedding ring made her to wear her wedding ring out in the morning only for her to hide it in glove compartment later in the day?

Sometimes I wonder how people reason, but I know when sentiments set in human being losses their logical reasoning.

if your wife removes her wedding ring barely years into the marriage, please tell us what your poitive reaction to it would be.

How does ignoring a person's messages constitute as flirting with an ex?

Family › Re: Could My Wife Be Cheating? by Mutendiwashe(f): 10:50pm On Jul 12, 2015

abbey621:
You still don't get it do you? If a wife does not like an action by her husband for goodness sake let him know, if he does not change involve people who can talk to him. You act as if marriage is about tit for tat, if a woman should react the way she has to every little issue in her marriage, she would soon find herself out the door. By your reasoning because the man took off his ring or he isn't a good communicator, the wife has the freedom to flirt with another man, confide in him and who knows what. When did Africans start acting like the Kardashians?

you clearly misinterpreted me. To every action there is a reaction, of you know for certain the reaction will not be a good one why remove the ring in the first place? A ring symbolises a union between 2 people and its only a grossly inconsiderate person who would think there would not be a negative reaction after doing something knowing every well it disrespects that their union stands for.

So what you are simply saying is if a man is not a good communicator something can always be done about it to make it better but if the wife on the other hand is not a good communicator the marriage should be thrown down the drain?

Clearly your idea of marriage is one-sided. One has to be at the receiving end and the other has to be the one giving, no 2ways about it.

Family › Re: Could My Wife Be Cheating? by Mutendiwashe(f): 9:59pm On Jul 12, 2015

abbey621:
It's not excusable but it does not give the woman the right to do what she's done. We are Africans, whatever happened to reporting him to his family members or someone he respects? You people keep trying to come up with lame excuses for a married woman to flirt around and I'll keep telling you all the same thing, it's pure bullshit!

show me where i gave lame excuse for her to cheat? If you remove your wedding ring, do you think its very reasonable to expect her to continue being a jolly good wife after having such an insult to her union thrown in her face?
Why would you do something you wouldnt want the other person to do to you and still expect everything to remain remain rosy?

You should never open your marriage to trials you cannot handle when thrown back in your face. Be the good spouse you want you wife/husband to be and see if you will not reap the benefits thereof

1 Like

Family › Re: Could My Wife Be Cheating? by Mutendiwashe(f): 9:53pm On Jul 12, 2015

abbey621:
Stop it already with your biased assessment! I'm assuming you are not married because if you were you would understand that things are not always rosy like the movies would have us believe. Are you telling me the guy turns up the music every time she wants to have a discussion or is this a one time event in which she has chosen to capitalize on? If I was in the guy's position, we would already be discussing divorce or at least a temporary separation, the fact that he's still looking for advice shows me that he has not given up on her. I don't tolerate bullshit and what the wife has done is inexcusable, I've seen women sent packing not doing half as much so trust me when I say she should thank God she married a cool headed guy!

we are assuming removing a wedding ring barely a half a decade into the marriage is excusable?

So since other people would rather throw away a marriage for half as much it makes it the mature and sensible thing to do because some other people out there are doing it as well?

1 Like

Family › Re: Could My Wife Be Cheating? by Mutendiwashe(f): 9:52pm On Jul 12, 2015*

freelance777:
Unfortunately we have kids together, 2 kids to be precise. So am on some serious hanging here. If not, I might probably have parted ways with her.

maybe you got into marriage a little too early before you became mature enough to handle it.

Unless you are perfect you should be working on bringing the trust and openness into the marriage. You have to be mature enough to fix things that are broken and not just throw it away.

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Family › Re: Could My Wife Be Cheating? by Mutendiwashe(f): 9:46pm On Jul 12, 2015

wagazala:
Bros, begin find new wife.

If your wife would go as far as cook and confide in another woman's husband other than you then obviously something is wrong. The usual template answer most people will give you on this forum is have a heart to heart talk about it to your wife, pray about it, etc. Forgerrit, if you don't have kids yet, i'll suggest you start packing your bags.

It will always be easy for any 12year old child to come online and give advice on marriage when they have never been in a committed relationship before.

Marriage comes with its ups and downs and if you always think of getting off the next bus stop everytime an issue arises be ready to do the same with the next 5 or 6 women you will marry.

Show me a perfect man or woman and i will show you the world's biggest liar. Too many imperfect people expecting a perfect spouse.

This is something that can be worked on my being more open in the relationship. How can a person remove his ring and still expect the other person to be 100% perfect when they have given that person a million reasons to mistrust or grow distant from them.

To freelance777 if your excuse for removing your wedding is not either because you are allergic to the material or it was too tight, i would say you created reasons for your wife to find consolation in other people. You need to sit down with her. If her removing her wedding ring affected you this much, dont expect your removing your wedding ring to have done anything less to her.

Find the root of the problem and fix it. The grass is not always greener on the other side. Perfect women do not fall from the sky especially for an imperfect man.

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Travel › Re: Help! Hunger Is About To Wipe Out Zimbabwe. Currency Just A Mere Tissue Paper... by Mutendiwashe(f): 9:12am On Jun 14, 2015

Anything to make headlines I see? Lol. Zimbabwe stopped using the ZWD in 2009, that makes your story 6years late

Family › . by Mutendiwashe(op): 9:08am On Jun 06, 2015*

Family › Re: Embarassed By A Helper by Mutendiwashe(f): 11:21pm On May 13, 2015

Ukasekerera benzi mangwana rinokurova.
I really dont see anything wrong with yoy dismissing her, people will always continue with misbehaving so long they know that they can get away with it. You need a helper you know you can safely leave your house with when you go out. You deserves someone trustworthy, if she mistakens your kindness for foolish then you shouldnt be carrying such a burden.

Celebrities › Re: Oritsefemi’s Babymama Fires Back At Him, ‘you’re Heartless And Cruel’ by Mutendiwashe(f): 4:35pm On Apr 21, 2015

a rather immature way of breaking up with a woman i must say...

Nairaland General › Re: Nigerian Doctor Who Killed British Patient Sues Victim Son by Mutendiwashe(f): 2:40am On Feb 04, 2015

Its not like what the author wrote is a lie or degrading. So why is he wasting his time with a lawsuit?

Family › Re: Woman Gets Revenge On Cheating Husband By Sleeping With His Mistress’ Brother by Mutendiwashe(f): 2:38am On Feb 04, 2015

cococandy:
I've seen this picture on the internet somewhere before. So I know it is a forged story

Good for them sha. Balanced equation

i will agree that the pic may have been taken elsewhere but im positive the story is true. Some Zim women are capable of something like this, you know they say hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

Family › Re: Stinking Pussies: Women Learn Your Hygiene! by Mutendiwashe(f): 8:15pm On Dec 20, 2014

Sophyrocks:
Buhahahaha. That his statement gave him out. He must be really dirty. How can you say the hygiene of a man is not a cause for concern? thats the thought of a dirty person o. LOL. All these men screaming, are we sure they are neat at all?

A few days ago i read an article of a woman who was cheating on her husband. He found shocking whatsapp messages on her phone.
One of the messages she sent was, "im going to make you eat my p*ssy, thats you punishment." And after that she talked about sucking him like its a lollipop.
I can bet $100 on it that her husband kept amazon forest between his legs and she never gave him any action.
If you want to enjoy your sex life you both have to be hygeinic.

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Family › Re: Stinking Pussies: Women Learn Your Hygiene! by Mutendiwashe(f): 8:44am On Dec 18, 2014

njokusboy:
Lol owk, but men own never turn issue of public concern, una own na national emergency...

and you wonder why girls never go down on you, keep being in denial. No one wants to go down on your bush or weird looking skin. Hygeine is not for women alone, because when your gf/wife starts cheating and going down and doing all sorts of kinky things with a clean guy, you will shout women are devils cheesy

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Literature › Re: Life As I Know It by Mutendiwashe(op): 8:01pm On Dec 12, 2014

CHAPTER 6

"Which one is your favourite, i would like to try out something u like?"

Typical! I had decided to stylishly give the power back to him. I don't want to be the inconsiderate girl who likes to abuse guys and make them spend what she wouldnt normally spend for a damn dinner.

"Well there is Leone L'Africano and China garden."

I am a student and i have basically lived on noodles 70% of the time, i was not going to a chinese restaurant to have more noobdles stuffed down my throat. I might as well try Italian food.

"Italian sounds good to me"
"Leone L'Africano it is"

We got to the restaurant and he opened my door. I was stunned. Was this man really African, i thought to myself. I have never been given such special treatment before. I guess there is a first time for everything. I surely enjoyed this.

We sat down and the waiter came with the menu. Lance asked me to order the wine. He did it again, i was the one in control tonight.
Honestly speaking i didn't want to be in control because i could not pronounce some of the names on that list. Sometimes i wonder why these people cannot give simple names to these things. Something he can all pronounce. I was a bit hesistant, but i could not let him see it that i was a bit nervous.

Literature › Re: Life As I Know It by Mutendiwashe(op): 11:24pm On Dec 11, 2014

Thanks you guys, i will try and update more often after work. Mwaaaah

Literature › Re: Life As I Know It by Mutendiwashe(op): 10:27pm On Dec 11, 2014*

CHAPTER 5

It was a sunny tuesday, Lance called me and asked if i wanted to go out for dinner later on.

"Sure i will tell you when im done with my classes for the day. How is work?"

By this time i had an ear to ear smile, i could not help it. I even wanted to jump around like a 5year old who just got her first bicycle.

" its not bad, all i can do now is just hope the day passes by quick and i can be with you"
"I would love to see you too"

Oh crap! Did i just the "l" word? This was stupid and immature! I hope he wont be freaked out! Why could i just not laugh and say, " see you soon" why did i have to sound too forward? Who says that to a guy so soon? A girl in a serious relationship for that matter!i kept silent until he said something. Oh Lord i hope he doesn't hang up and never talk to me ever again.

" well see you soon, just a few more hours to go"

Phew, i was glad to hear him say that i was going on a date with a guy, after months and months. I was really excited.

All i could think of was our date. I was literally doing a countdown in class. I felt like i just won a lottery... Well not a lottery maybe just a pair of designer heels, maybe not Christian Louboutin just a high fashion designer like Zara.

Around 7pm he called me and told me he would be knocking off work soon and he would come over after he freshens up by 8pm. I was an eager beaver, i had showered by 6pm. All i had to do was dress up.

I wore my favourite black jeans and floral blue top. I was not going to behave like a typical small town girl and over dress. I had to act like someone who has lived in the big city long enough to know that less is more.

My little 30ml of DKNY was my pot of gold i saved for special occasions. And this date was one. As an average girl, you know you cannot afford to have it all, so you buy that one expensive thing that you will treat like a pot of gold and rarely use. My mother had her china she kept for special guests. It was always those rich relatives or those that lived in the diaspora that got the lucky china. Lance deserved my special pot of gold.

I went downstairs and i got into his car the first thing he said was, " you look beautiful and you smell great"

All i could do was blush and look down at my fingers. I felt so shy. I hope i didnt put on too much. I wouldnt want to choke him to death. I was back to overthinking everthing again.

"Let me guess. Uhmmm... is that DKNY? The fragrance is unforgettable"
" yes it is, i didnt picture you as a guy that would actually know female fragrances"

He just smirked and started the car. Then he said, " so where are we going?"
" well i was hoping you would surprise me"

Eric never gave me the power, he normally decided everything, right from where we would live to the number of children and their names. It felt good to have a guy who would give me a little power. It made me feel wanted. The only problem however was that i had no idea on where we would go.

I am a student and i was too used to going to fast food outlets, never romantic expensive dinner dates. Suddenly i had the power i sometimes wished Eric would give me and i had no idea of what to do with it. Ha! The beauty of being a woman, you will never know how much you do not need something until its put in your hands.

Romance › Re: Why Do Men Think Its Okay...its Not! by Mutendiwashe(f): 10:15pm On Dec 11, 2014

Okonkwo2211:
wetin dis zim mugabe prostitute scoutin for fresh nyjerien meat again to give AIDS?!

one thing i learnt about attention seekers on the forum, is that you simply ignore them. The normal attention you can never get in real life, you use a faceless forum to get it. Well not from me. Run along

Romance › Re: Why Do Men Think Its Okay...its Not! by Mutendiwashe(f): 10:09pm On Dec 11, 2014

Oahray:
smh... An indecisive person cannot make EFFECTIVE decisions (and on time). If she has decided she didn't want him, what prevented her from sticking to that decision? She had to invite the same guy to her room just cos of selfish gain and actually spent time with him alone, to make up for it, giving the impression that she likes his company. Aren't there other guys that could help her? What happened to spending her money for repairs?

she already made it clear she doesnt want a relationship. So she cannot talk to him anymore because she doesn't want to date him?

Why wouldn't the guy accept the impression when that's what he wants? Read my post with your eyes open. The guy was childish, but she made a very foolish decision.

Accept what impression. How does fix my laptop for me mean i like you and i want to date you now?

It's wisdom to let your no mean no, and maturity to take responsibility for the consequences. She's neither wise nor mature.

no means no right? Tell me where the OP said that she wanted to give him a chance? Why read too much meaning into what doesn't exist?

If a guy makes it clear he doesn't want to date a girl, would he be wise to take her out to a candlelight dinner for two? Use your head na.

you are comparing fixing a laptop and a dinner for two? How was fixing a laptop in any way a romantic setting?

1 Like

Romance › Re: Why Do Men Think Its Okay...its Not! by Mutendiwashe(f): 8:11am On Dec 04, 2014

How exactly does that make her cheap when she flatly refused his advances twice?

Equado:
Ill say the fact here...1st from all assessment from the guy's point of view you're cheap...and you woudnt b here complaining abt 'men' if it was a guy you like......

1 Like

Romance › Re: Why Do Men Think Its Okay...its Not! by Mutendiwashe(f): 8:04am On Dec 04, 2014

Wolenice:
Women are very complex and complicated creatures......poor him

How is she complicated when she told him flat out that she is not interested. So if someone asks for your help it means they want to date u?

1 Like

Romance › Re: Why Do Men Think Its Okay...its Not! by Mutendiwashe(f): 8:00am On Dec 04, 2014

Oahray:
He obviously thinks you are indecisive and need extra push to go back on your words. I agree. He just didn't know when and how hard to push.

how does asking someone to fix a laptop equate to being indecisive. She made her thoughts known right from the word go, so how does fixing a laptop change anything? undecided

What makes him different from a girl who thinks that a guy simply taking her out for a movie automatically means they are dating?

1 Like

Family › Re: Is It Right To Stop Poor Folks From Having Kids They can't Cater For? by Mutendiwashe(f): 6:27am On Dec 04, 2014*

I might sound harsh to some but this is how i honestly feel. Free vasectomy procedures must be given to poor people. I have a uncle who dashed 2 of his children to my parents. Both girls are blockheads! One had to repeat IGSCE but she did not come out with anything sensible, she got pregnant and got married, that his how she got off my parent's back. A few years later he dashed his other daughter to my parents to take care of. This one is a serious case. She is too dull and at 11 she still bed wets.

This has put a serious restraint on my parents relationship, because they are no longer as lovey dovey as they were before this child came to our house. My father does not like her at all and my mother just keeps her because its her brother's daughter.

His younger son revealed that his father had plans of sending him too to our house so my parents will take him to school. If this ever happens im scared that my parent's relationship will even grow further apart, my father plans on retiring when he reaches 60 and he surely will not have 2 mysterious children keeping him from enjoying his old age.

These people break other people's homes so yes i believe, it is right to stop them from having children they cannot take care of. If you cannot keep them together or feed them, you cannot call them your family at all.

4 Likes

Culture › Re: Why Do Nairalanders Have An Obsession With Skin Tones? by Mutendiwashe(f): 6:07am On Dec 04, 2014

I agree people have to learn to appreciate themselves.

Fulaman198:
To a certain extent I agree with you. However, some people also want someone who looks like them as well. it really varies from individual to individual. It's possible (I'm not saying it is fact without any solid scientific evidence) that dark complexioned guys do prefer lighter skinned girls due to having some sort of insecurity.

Beauty is beauty, plain and simple. I wish more and more people recognised that. It has absolutely nothing to do with ones skin tone/complexion.

Literature › Re: Life As I Know It by Mutendiwashe(op): 2:12pm On Dec 01, 2014*

CHAPTER 4

I had once again forgotten about Lance since he was out of sight for some time. I was focusing on school and Eric until the girls wanted use to go out one more time before finals. I was not up for it, neither was Eric. He felt i had changed. I felt i had changed too.

We went for dinner at Massimo as planned until Vannessa insisted on getting more alcohol. This meant going to a club. I have started breaking promises to Eric again. I guess we were not going to skype that day. He was furious with me and this tome around he decided not to stay up until i got home, i felt like i was gonna lose him because of this party animals. I love my friends but im sorry i loved him more and i was not ready to lose him because of loud music and alcohol.

We walked into la Aziz and behold there was Lance sitting with his friends. My heart skipped, what was i going to do this time around? I better behave. I pretended not to see him and walked to the bar a little far from him. I didnt want to seem like i only came to this place for him. He eventually spotted me and when he did i was actually looking at him band our eyes met. I smiled and waved a little. He smiled and waved back.y heart was now racing. I wondered to myself what has this man done to me?

He walked up to me and the first thing. He said was," i regret not collecting your number the other day. You look stunning"
All i could was blush and smile, "well you look good yourself" i replied.
" let me get it now before u escape from me."
" hahaha, you make it sound like i was in captive before" i said. And i thought to myself i hope that didn't sound stupid.
" its not too busy today, i hope i will be able to drag you to the dancefloor" he simply said.

His accent could not have sound any more sexy. This man was putting me in a position i was not too sure i would want to escape from. Everything about him was just so inviting. Who wouldn't want to be with a good man with a good job. This time around i was not feeling guilty about it anymore, besides Eric wasn't in the mood to talk to me, he would rather go to sleep than keep me company. I guess it wouldn't hurt to have someone else keep me company for the evening, its not like i was hurting anyone.

" i promise i will join you, provided that you let me dance behind you" i said and immediately i regretted it.
He looked a little stunned by my suggestion, but he eventually grinned from ear to ear and said, "challenge accepted! But i will have to move out of town soon after that"
We both laughed.

The night went smoothly we laughed and talked about a lot of things. There was no dancing whatsoever. We had a connection and i liked it. It was 2am and we decided to leave together he was going to drop me off. Was he not quite the gentleman? Other guys would always ask you to go to their hotel room or their apartment. But Lance was the perfect gentleman. He was different. At least i thought.

When we got to my hostel he kissed my cheek good night and for a moment there i thought of planting on his lips. Its very funny how we women behave. If a man kisses u on the lips on the first day you would call him a jerk but if he is a gentleman like Lance and he sticks to the cheek, all you want to do is be all over him.

All i could do was say thank u for the pleasant evening and leave his car before i did something i was going to regret. Not even 10seconds after leaving his car i was already picturing myself as his girlfriend. How he would be so sweet and considerate, by the time i got to my bedroom door i was already imagining being married to him. Talk about being too forward.

Culture › Re: Why Do Nairalanders Have An Obsession With Skin Tones? by Mutendiwashe(f): 1:41pm On Dec 01, 2014

I have noticed that most of the men who are obssessed with skintone are actually dark skinned men. Sometimes i believe it comes with insecurity, everyone wants to make "beautiful offsprings" and many believe that the only way they can do so is by making them lighter.

If you come across light skinned men they never make a fuss about it, they usually are not insecure about their looks hence they never obssess over skintone.

A good example would be the comedians like AY and SeyiLaw look at their skintones and you will understand why they over-emphasise on skintone and bleaching jokes, its a way of hiding behind their insecurities as being extremely dark men who are not facially blessed either.

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