Hello guys,
Having attended Baptism of Holy Spirit Class at Winners Chapel, my wife has possesed the spirit of speaking in tongues and even prophesying in tonges too since October 2011 but i do not want that at all - the whole thing looks very strange to me, she herself has become a strange person to me, it scares me whenever she starts all those syllables of speaking in unknown tongues, even at some points, she goes in spirit.
As for me, I DON'T WANT ALL OF THESE AT ALL. HOW CAN SHE DO AWAY WITH ALL THAT BECAUSE I DON'T WANT IT AT ALL. Since she got that 'supposedly spirit of tongues' , i have never been sexually attracted to her again, our home has changed from being lively, bubbling to very moody one - is that how holy spirit works? Also, my haome has been experiencing all forms of unrest or the other between myself and her.  Also, i am scared of loosing her to prophetic ministry.
I am a Baptist by denomination but she is a Winner. Because of this, i have instructed her to leave the church and start coming to my own church.
Please house, what is ur opinion. I want bthat spirit to leave her. Please, i don't want any abusive statement, be polite in ur answer.
Thank you.

Why does it irritate you? Does she wake up at night and start shouting and speaking in tongues? Is she failing in any of her wifely duties? Has she become rude or defiant?
Forgive my questions I just need to know specifically why you feel the way you do before I can offer any valuable advice.

how's something that's totally spiritual supposed to affect a home this much.
I dont gerrit!

My wife is no more lively in the house again but always very moody and dull. Her interest in sex with has drastically reduced. I don't find great excuitement in her again and in fact, i am seeing a different person in my house already and i am not confortable about that at all. Is that it's used to be?

gunshin I understand what you are getting at. She is a totally changed person and this is all too much for you to handle.
She needs to be advised on how to accommodate you with this her new found zeal. But you also need to give her time.
There is nothing wrong in worshipping God and you have to show tolerance for her.
Honestly I advice yo to show her that you respect her spirituality and even join her in prayer. A family that prays together, stays together.
I am sure she will be her old self in bed again.
Look it might be more your resentment than her new way of worship that is creating this tension in the house.

Have you tried talking with her? Notice I said talking with her not talking to her or ordering her or commanding her. Talk with her, find out why she is moody, listen to her reasons and find out how you both can work it out.
When it comes to religion I know a lot of Nigerians can loose their heads but you are the head of the house commanded by God to love, care, tolerate and understand your wife. Your headship is not to Lord over her but to in patience and politness find ways to solve your issues.
Love is not rude or arrogant, Love bares all endures all.
When it comes to church matters you have to thread carefully and tactifully. First of all, when you married her did you agree that she would leave her church? I do not support a woman holding unto her own church but these days these so many people are more committed to going to a certain church than they are in serving God, hence the need for tact. If you are not tactful and smart you will be labeled an agent of satan by her church members and could lead to a serious permanent gap in ur home.
Talk with her gently, find out why she is moody, ask her what's making her s3xually unavailable. Don't fight with her don't give her ultimatums and orders, drag her gently out of her shell, when she is talking tell her your fears about her gift and how you really feel. Gods gifts are meant to bring families together not tear them apart

Mutter, i really thank you for your very matured reply. Though in some measure, i must confess that many a time i feel intimidated by her present level spiritually, but i feel she leaves the tongue speaking church - Winners - to my Church, Baptist where such doctrine is not popular. Also, i have heard so many arguments against speaking in tongues too, whereby i was told those who practise such thing are possessed with familiar spirit. How about that?

gunshin, it is all about religious tolerance. Everyone thinks only their church is the right one.
Religion is a personal relationship with God. You are not contending with man here but with God. I is about trying and not doing it right.
I envy your wife!!!
For years I have been searching fo closer relationship with God to no avail. I am even so lazy when it comes to prayer.
Maybe she can put me in her prayers that God will touch me as he has touched her.

Yeah I agree with debrief. You need to have a heart to heart with her in a very gentle manner. Whatever you do, do not tell her you want this 'spirit to leave her’. You would be asking for trouble. She will say you are an unbeliever trying to bring her down spiritually. It is possible she is starting to see a divide in the spiritual levels between the two of you and some women handle it poorly by alienating the guy, but I wonder if the change in your marriage did not start with you. You said you stopped being sexually attracted to her when she started speaking in tongues, all the tension may have started there.

You need to have an open mind and give her some level of freedom as well. You can’t stop her from prophesying in tongues but you could ask her to do it in a way/place that is not disturbing the peace in the home. To order her to leave her church and come to yours is asking for trouble o. The divide will just keep getting wider.

Praying together everyday is an excellent suggestion because it reassures her that you both believe in God. In the meantime, try to analyze why it affects you so much that you are no longer attracted to her.

@POSTER JUST BECARFUL WITH UR WIFE SPEAKING IN TONQUE AND PROPHECYING IS FROM GOD AND ANYTHING GOD DO FOR HUMAN BEING IS INVISIBLE IN STRUCTURE ANY MAN THAT WANT TO STOP OR FIND OUT ITS COME MIGHT LOSS HIS MOST IMPORTANT PART OF THE BODY, YOU DONT LIKE SPEAKING INTORQUE BECAUSE SPEAKING IN TONQUE TO AFFECT UR DEMONIC SPIRIT IN YOU, BECARFULLL BECARFULL BECARFUL

webcam:

@POSTER JUST BECARFUL WITH UR WIFE SPEAKING IN TONQUE AND PROPHECYING IS FROM GOD AND ANYTHING GOD DO FOR HUMAN BEING IS INVISIBLE IN STRUCTURE ANY MAN THAT WANT TO STOP OR FIND OUT ITS COME MIGHT LOSS HIS MOST IMPORTANT PART OF THE BODY, YOU DONT LIKE SPEAKING INTORQUE BECAUSE SPEAKING IN TONQUE TO AFFECT UR DEMONIC SPIRIT IN YOU, BECARFULLL BECARFULL BECARFUL

Are you writing in English or writing in tongues?

What has light got to do with darkness? How did you two become equally yoked? Bros, are you sure you're not possessed? I have never seen any Christian husband complaining that his wife is now filled with the Holy Ghost and his house is no longer "fun"! You mean "fun" in the worldly way, right? Are you sure you are a born-again Christian? This is the strangest thing I have ever heard from a Christian husband and the replies so far are full of all manner of dead works.

This man is resentful of his wife because she is now baptized with the Holy Ghost and instead of rejoicing and seeking this baptism for himself, he is complaining here on Nairaland and seeking ways to stop the flow the Spirit. Here is the good news my friend: you can't stop the work or the move of God. If you are a born-again Christian like you say you are, then you will know that your only recourse is to get on your knees and seek God's face for your own encounter with the Holy Spirit. I am sure your wife is also praying for you. Why don't you pray with her everyday for the next month and see what happens? Do you now want to start resisting the Spirit in your wife's life or start making her life miserable because of her fellowship with the Lord? Do you want to become a stumbling block, thus inviting a visitation of God's wrath.

Have you tried following her to her church if only out of curiosity? Have you asked the Holy Spirit for your own baptism? Have you gone to see your own Baptist pastor for advice? Do you think you can find good spiritual advice on Nairaland? There is so much wrong with this thread. I don't even know where to start from. May God give you the wisdom and grace to do the right thing. Amen.

moremi2008:

What has light got to do with darkness? How did you two become equally yoked? Bros, are you sure you're not possessed? I have never seen any Christian husband complaining that his wife is now filled with the Holy Ghost and his house is no longer "fun"! You mean "fun" in the worldly way, right? Are you sure you are a born-again Christian? This is the strangest thing I have ever heard from a Christian husband and the replies so far are full of all manner of dead works.

This man is resentful of his wife because she is now baptized with the Holy Ghost and instead of rejoicing and seeking this baptism for himself, he is complaining here on Nairaland and seeking ways to stop the flow the Spirit. Here is the good news my friend: you can't stop the work or the move of God. If you are a born-again Christian like you say you are, then you will know that your only recourse is to get on your knees and seek God's face for your own encounter with the Holy Spirit. I am sure your wife is also praying for you. Why don't you pray with her everyday for the next month and see what happens? Do you now want to start resisting the Spirit in your wife's life or start making her life miserable because of her fellowship with the Lord? Do you want to become a stumbling block, thus inviting a visitation of God's wrath.

Have you tried following her to her church if only out of curiosity? Have you asked the Holy Spirit for your own baptism? Have you gone to see your own Baptist pastor for advice? Do you think you can find good spiritual advice on Nairaland? There is so much wrong with this thread. I don't even know where to start from. May God give you the wisdom and grace to do the right thing. Amen.

The fact is he never said he was born again but gbam to the rest of your post. We were just trying to tell him gently

ileobatojo:

The fact is he never said he was born again but gbam to the rest of your post. We were just trying to tell him gently 

But he is claiming Baptist! I am pretty sure you need to be born-again to be a regular member at that church! The most born-again, spiri-koko person I know was born and raised in a Baptist church and she has been a spiri-koko sister since I met her in secondary school. Anyway, you are right. By their fruits you shall know them. Not everyone that shows up to church and calls out "My Lord, My Lord!" is truly serving God.

odikwa risky

dayokanu:

odikwa risky

What does this mean?

moremi2008:

What has light got to do with darkness? How did you two become equally yoked? Bros, are you sure you're not possessed? I have never seen any Christian husband complaining that his wife is now filled with the Holy Ghost and his house is no longer "fun"! You mean "fun" in the worldly way, right? Are you sure you are a born-again Christian? This is the strangest thing I have ever heard from a Christian husband and the replies so far are full of all manner of dead works.

This man is resentful of his wife because she is now baptized with the Holy Ghost and instead of rejoicing and seeking this baptism for himself, he is complaining here on Nairaland and seeking ways to stop the flow the Spirit. Here is the good news my friend: you can't stop the work or the move of God. If you are a born-again Christian like you say you are, then you will know that your only recourse is to get on your knees and seek God's face for your own encounter with the Holy Spirit. I am sure your wife is also praying for you. Why don't you pray with her everyday for the next month and see what happens? Do you now want to start resisting the Spirit in your wife's life or start making her life miserable because of her fellowship with the Lord? Do you want to become a stumbling block, thus inviting a visitation of God's wrath.

Have you tried following her to her church if only out of curiosity? Have you asked the Holy Spirit for your own baptism? Have you gone to see your own Baptist pastor for advice? Do you think you can find good spiritual advice on Nairaland? There is so much wrong with this thread. I don't even know where to start from. May God give you the wisdom and grace to do the right thing. Amen.

Thank you and God bless you abundantly. Look at what a lot of men are looking for and one person is sitting down and rebuking his wife and he calls himself a christian. God Have mercy on you. May Envy not make you ruin your own life with your own hands.

You need serious deliverance and now I know why your wife was given such a gift, to slap that madness comot for your face. Who are you to sit down there and tell us that you want to stop God from working in your home? who the heck are you? Who are you to stop who God wants to use for his work?

Seriously, who are you? you are jealous of your own wife's gift? God have mercy on you.

awww speaking in tongue doesn't change your person. From my understanding some can do it and some can't. My mother speaks in tongue- incredibly prayerful, she can rock the house when she begins her sessions.
You invite her to the latest owambe and she's a completely different person, she will have the largest gele and rock the most expensive belly chain. It doesn't change her at all. Even when she started working for deeper life, her character was still there it was just a lil suppressed in her display.

Your thinking too much into it, I think because of your limited understanding of the bible and the holy spirit your perceiving things differently. Your spirituality is a completely different relationship. My spiritual being has changed many times but my person is still the same.

Don't let these things affect your relationship with your wife. If she has less interest in things it's for another reason.

^^^IS it not cool to have a mum like that? a mum you can ask questions and get answers from? a woman that stands on the gap for her kids if she smeels any rat from miles away? I mean, this poster has got no idea what he's got in his house.

There are times when one prays and prays and prays and you are still not sure of what to do, what I do is pick up my phone and ring naija, speak to her and gbam I get my message.

Gosh poster,you have someone that will help build your home for you very well by the grace Of God and you are complaining? see how devil has just entered you and is ready to use you to destroy your home? o'ma se ooooo

@Moremi2008, seriously you mean you posted all that?       Thumbs up!  Poster, please take his advice seriously!

[size=3pt]Moremi2008, I think we need to have a chat.  I mean what happened to you? [/size]

@poster, are you intimidated that God might reveal your bad secrets to her?

speaking in tongue has nothing to do with denomination(baptist,winner or whatever), the holy spirit has got hold of her and there is nothing you can do about it.

If you are really a christian and not just a church goer then you must understand. No need to be scared of her

queensmith:

awww speaking in tongue doesn't change your person. From my understanding some can do it and some can't. My mother speaks in tongue- incredibly prayerful, she can rock the house when she begins her sessions.
You invite her to the latest owambe and she's a completely different person, she will have the largest gele and rock the most expensive belly chain. It doesn't change her at all. Even when she started working for deeper life, her character was still there it was just a lil suppressed in her display.

Your thinking too much into it, I think because of your limited understanding of the bible and the holy spirit your perceiving things differently. Your spirituality is a completely different relationship. My spiritual being has changed many times but my person is still the same.

Don't let these things affect your relationship with your wife. If she has less interest in things it's for another reason.

Being baptized by the Holy Spirit will only change your personality if you continue to fellowship deeply with Him. Nobody goes into deep fellowship with the Holy Spirit and remains the same. Everything changes! I had an encounter with the Holy Spirit when I was 14 and it changed my entire life. I would up for hours praising and worshiping God and I would be blinded by light (in a dark room) and speak in tongues for hours. I would worship and praise God so loudly and so consistently that my mum started doing the same thing in her room (across the house) and became baptized too. And then our neighbors started joining in and walking up to me during the day. I really can't and won't go into details here (too much personal info) but that encounter CHANGED my life! My grades shot through the roof! I became wise beyond my years and I was an automatic leader where ever I showed up. Yes, it changes you deeply but only if you continue that fellowship. Of course, all that "personality" change disappeared as soon as I started college in the US and backslid into this glamorous and sexy world! I am slowly making my way back, but to be honest, that kind of spiritual experience scares me but I know God's Will will be done. Amen.

jennykadry:

^^^IS it not cool to have a mum like that? a mum you can ask questions and get answers from? a woman that stands on the gap for her kids if she smeels any rat from miles away? I mean, this poster has got no idea what he's got in his house.

There are times when one prays and prays and prays and you are still not sure of what to do, what I do is pick up my phone and ring naija, speak to her and gbam I get my message.

Gosh poster,you have someone that will help build your home for you very well by the grace Of God and you are complaining? see how devil has just entered you and is ready to use you to destroy your home? o'ma se ooooo

Thank God for my spirit-filled prayer-warrior Mum or I would be a dead man by now. Nothing like a praying mother oh! Nothing on this planet Earth is like it! When I was living the life of a young, fly rascal in the world, her prayers reached God and God touched me in unbelievable ways. Her prayers and incessant supplication stood in the gap for me and I am forever grateful to God for using her in my life! (Yeah, I am a momma's boy and I am VERY proud of it because I have the best mum in the world! )

Although all of my formal education rejects the very notion of God, my life's experience with Divine Intervention and with the power of my mum's prayers stand as solid testimonies to God's unbelievable power and grace. He is The Merciful One! He is the Great I Am for real! Oh, I could testify forever and ever but not on Nairaland oh! This place is just for fun and back-sliding only.

Analytical:

@Moremi2008, seriously you mean you posted all that?       Thumbs up!  Poster, please take his advice seriously!

[size=3pt]Moremi2008, I think we need to have a chat.  I mean what happened to you? [/size]

I don't mean to insult you, but I am not interested! I can only have as much fun as I do on here if I can keep my real life and my NL screenname as separate as I can. But seriously, why are you acting all surprised? I have mentioned on here several times that I go to church pretty regularly (twice a week is a LOT of church by US standards). I don't go to church because I have to! I go because I am saved, you dimwit !

Something just got riled-up in me when I read this man coming here to complain about what is probably the most wonderful experience in his wife's life! Like Aunty Jenny said, this should be a source of joy and thanksgiving to him! Instead he is coming on here to complain about it! Yeparipa! May God not allow the devil to use us as vessels oh!

Moremi2008, that's okay.  Your last post told me what I needed to know.  I didn't want to derail the thread, that's why I inivited the chat.  I say amen to that your prayer request that God's will be done in your life and you make your way back to Him very soon.  My heart just goes out to you as I read that.  I certainly will be praying for you.

God bless.

You need to calm down and change your orientation towards your wifes new spiritual status. It will reduce the tension u re feeling.then sit her down and have a word with her on ur feeling and all. Don't discourage her or grieve the holy spirit that's a sin that cannot be forgiven so be care ful.I feel you should be happy with the new spiritual sensitivity of your wife its signifies great covering for your home

See thats the thing moremi- she's been speaking in tongues before i was born. Who she was before that was probably different but who she is has never changed. If your step into religion was all of a sudden the obviously you will feel to take drastic change.
Over the course of time you will realise the changes arent at all realistic and backslide like you said. Or you can keep it real throughout your journey with God l. Which in my opinion is what my mother did. She had opinions that were influenced by her beliefs, but never allowed them to cloud her judgement. She had a social life, all the things that your typical pastor will make you feel like its wrong to own she owned. Because her person always shined through.

I think the ops situation is just down to attending different churches. Unlike what someone has said that does make a great difference. If your household is catholic for example then thier views will also be different and slightly judgemental.

@jenny abi! A woman that knows everything! Lol

When one gets to "spiritual" that it starts to affect their marriage,s/he needs to watch it else one might give way to the other.

OP,talk with your wife.You said she has become sexually unattractive and not showing much intrest in sex again right?that's definietly worth a talk! There should be a balance between the spiritual and physical life.If you guys as a couple were the liberal type of Christians initially,it would only be fair if one party carries the other along as s/he decides to take the spiritual level up a notch to avoid giving the other a rude shock.Your wife should carry you along,its her duty as a christian and a wife.

Btw,last i read the bible,speaking in tongues without interpretations does not edify no mortal.

@Moremi,baptist is an old time laid back church.I was born as one,sunbeam,GA to lydia,i went through all and as OP rightly said,they dont "believe"(for lack of better words) in speaking in tongues bla bla however the church generally is beginging to embrace "the new fire band

@Ifyalways, you are right. Baptist is (or rather used to be) very laid back and anti-pentecostal. They certainly don't believe in speaking in tongues and the manifestation of other gifts of the Spirit. They believe the era is gone! This is changing however and I have seen shifts in their doctrinal stands.

@Gunshin and all, issues like doctrinal differences and church affiliations are things to be discussed and thrashed during courtship and not to be brushed aside as non-issues then, only to be instructing the woman now to stop and start attending your own. The truth is they are issues. They influence the way people view a lot of things. Having said this, let me give you a piece of advice: have a heart-to-heart discussion with your wife. But before that, please drop all prejudice and bias.

Since you are a christian and you are married to her, thankfully, you two have a common ground and the final authority in settling such differences should be the scriptures. Sit down and examine things without bias in the spirit of love, without any resentment from the scriptures and find out if what your wife is experiencing is scriptural or strange and don't let dogma drive a wedge in between you and your wife. Either of you should be ready to drop whatever is not backed up scripturally. This can be a rewarding exercise for both of you as you examine things together. If this is genuine, it will be futile for you to ask the 'spirit leave' her. Rather, humble yourself before God and ask Him to illuminate you about what you don't know and experience Him in a deeper and new dimension.

Having said this, I also have a word for your wife. The Holy Spirit has come to make life comfortable for us because He is the Spirit of Comfort. He is definitely not the author of confusion. The spirit of the prophet is also subject to the prophet. Speaking in tongues or being baptised in the Sprirt with that evidence is not synonymous to being a nuisance. She should become a better wife. The working of the Spirit should make her to bear the fruit of love, joy, meekeness, gentleness, patience, self-control, etc! She should be more sexy, inviting etc to her husband. It is certainly erroneous for her to 'whip' her husband with tongues or start prophesying in the bedroom when it's time for action! She should let it be evident in her disposition to her husband that value has been added to her life and stop playing religion!

I am sure things need to be balanced up. If the wife applies wisdom and tact, very soon the husband will be joining her in tongues! This is where action should speak louder than the tongues.

moremi2008:

Being baptized by the Holy Spirit will only change your personality if you continue to fellowship deeply with Him. Nobody goes into deep fellowship with the Holy Spirit and remains the same. Everything changes! I had an encounter with the Holy Spirit when I was 14 and it changed my entire life. I would up for hours praising and worshiping God and I would be blinded by light (in a dark room) and speak in tongues for hours. I would worship and praise God so loudly and so consistently that my mum started doing the same thing in her room (across the house) and became baptized too. And then our neighbors started joining in and walking up to me during the day. I really can't and won't go into details here (too much personal info) but that encounter CHANGED my life! My grades shot through the roof! I became wise beyond my years and I was an automatic leader where ever I showed up. Yes, it changes you deeply but only if you continue that fellowship. Of course, all that "personality" change disappeared as soon as I started college in the US and backslid into this glamorous and sexy world! I am slowly making my way back, but to be honest, that kind of spiritual experience scares me but I know God's Will will be done. Amen.

Hmmm, thanks for the insights into Moremi! I too had to ask myself if I was in the twilight zone when I saw your first post on this thread

Just wanted to comment on the bolded part. Having gone through a somewhat similar experience (though not nearly at that level you were) I must say it is a very slow climb back. I think it’s because at you point you had to shut down the holy spirit in you to be able to continue in the sinful ways. Rebooting is one heck of a task! But thank God for his unending love!

I thank you all for all ur advice. However, some still were bent on insulting me and my opinion. I feel and i believe i strongly need a help, that is why i put across this and as such, u need to provide a help as i rightly said in a very courteous and respectful manner not to be calling me Anti-Christ or devil or start insulting my personality. Please, i welcome those who have helpful advice not the other way.
Thank you

gunshin:

I thank you all for all ur advice. However, some still were bent on insulting me and my opinion. I feel and i believe i strongly need a help, that is why i put across this and as such, u need to provide a help as i rightly said in a very courteous and respectful manner not to be calling me Anti-Christ or devil or start insulting my personality. Please, i welcome those who have helpful advice not the other way.
Thank you

Oooooohhh!!!! This guy is beginning to really annoy me. I just can't deal! I clearly lack long-suffering and kindness so I'll let other "kinder" NL'ders continue with him.

gunshin, religion is the opium of the people and quite honestly I avoid getting into such discussions.
For people who do not believe in speaking in tongues, it is hard to accept and can sometimes be even frightening.  
I think it is wrong  for  people to react so harshly on him.
Gunshin does not love God less than anyone of you, he just finds his wife's method of prayer questionable and frightening. To everyone their own method. To be honest if my husband started speaking in tongues I would not find it conducive because I simply do not believe in it and that was not what i bargained for when I married him. So please respect that and no need to get rude.
Some people when they get the new calling just seem to think that they must detach themselves from worldly things and that can have a dramatic effect on your marriage.
Also I need to caution you, it can be a great danger to you when one partner gets fanatical. You may get under Psycho terror. God will get you and that can affect you drastically. The God I deserve is a loving and merciful God.
When my father suddenly got this way years back I lost a part of him because he could hardly communicate much to me. Every thing was a punishment from God etc.  Besides it is not only what one professes with their mouths that counts but the goodness of your heart.
You need to talk with your wife and I pray she is not so carried away that she can no longer see to reason.

I so co-sign Anatycal and Mutter's last posts respectively.
I can imagine the OP getting ready for a steamy "kpekus filled" night while the wife is busy,prophesying in the living room or the wife now sees anything but missionary as sin,stops bothering about her physical looks etc.LMAO

@OP,change is good and welcome.Spiritual growth is god too.I suggest you talk with your wife with an open mind.There should be a healthy balance.