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It really an interesting saga, if it where in the bible it will look like this.

BABY OIL CHAPTER 1-4



PART 1







And it came to pass in the Nigerian industry of entertainment two very popular figures abode.
The first man was a wealthy Igbo merchant by the name Cubana the son of Chief priest who by virtue of his uncommon riches and spending power was nicknamed by the people of his own time as "Money na water" because like water, there was no end to his possession.

But as for his haters, they addressed him by another name which was Owerri the son of Rickross because just like his bank account the man himself weighed a thousand Kilos, so that when he moved his feet in Owerri, the sound of it was heard in ABA.




The second figure was far more popular and he was know by the name Burna the son of Boy.
This man was as tall as an iroko and the hair on his head was like that of women, for like the prophet Isaiah, his scalp had no business with the razor.
His lips and nostrils were smokier than an exhaust pipe and his tongue confessed a hundred tunes.

So that whenever he opened his mouth the people of the world turned to themselves saying,
"Indeed our great father Fela has returned to us, for just like him, this man's music does not just make the pretty damsels swing their bottoms with all their power, it also makes the young men aspire to conquer.
It does not just criticize kings or prophesy against governors but it also makes the commoner remember his esteem.

For this very reason, the locals came together to give him the single name[b]"Africangiant[/b] while the foreigners anointed him with a golden crown with four letters inscribed on it.
"The Crown of Grammy"





2

And Lo after many years had passed, a certain musical clown from the far away village of Idemili emerged from the forest his name was Akpi the son of Nwamama.
This man Akpi carried an Android gong in his hand and from the forest he marched to market place.
He waited till the place was filled to the brim, after then he lifted his mouth up in a loud voice to shout out a strange and obscene question saying;
"Burna oh Burna I am not careful to address you in this matter. For we have reason to believe that not only your head was annoited by the foreigners but also your hairy buttocks. And Yea! I put it to you that Diddy that homosexual gangster has rocked thee from behind and as for your Grammy, it was not by talent"




3

Behold when it came to the ear of Burna what Akpi hath said, he had risen up in great anger saying.
"Oh what a profane accusation! I have no time to banter words with this fellow. To the prison house, he shall go. For I was on my own lying in my bed chamber smoking my weed and gulping potent wine when he came after my reputation. Therefore his back must be strong to bear the heavy wages"


And indeed as soon as the word left the mouth of Burna it did not return to him void.
The following morning, ten thousand police men greeted the foot path that led to Akpi's forest and without a word they cuffed and transported him to the deep dungeons of Kuje.





Few months passed then on one particular morning after Burna had smoked and drank his belly full. His soul was in a jolly good mood.


Thus, he decided to catch her a little cruise as it was a common practice in these times.
So he picked his apple gong, beat it to the four winds and shouted into the air.

"Cubana oh Cubana, it is you I summon.
Owerri the son of Rickross Hear ye my counsel. An acquaintance of yours had just gone to the white man's prison for fraud and now my inner witness tells me you're next"




4

When it got to the ear of the wealthy priest, what Burna had said.
His response was a little bit unexpected and worse.
For the merchant had neither asked a question like Akpi nor made a prediction like Burna but had instead declared boldly that Burna had indeed been annoited from behind by the Diddy the son of Puff. He had even gone ahead to add that the precious crown of Grammy was full of the homosexual's lubricant.


And Yea, this response had made the entire world gasp in shock saying what an abominable thing to say. Should Burna hear this reply, the Priest might have to go to a dungeon poorer than that of Akpi's.

However the following day the response of Burna had come not in the way everyone had imagined.
It had not come in words but in action.
Like a competent Sorcerer Burna had stretched out his hands into the four winds and selected a random member of Cubana's family and then went on to bless him with thirty million pieces of Silver.

As though that were not enough, his miraculous goodwill had gone beyond the Nation or Nigeria to the far away land of Kenya.
There, he had uprooted a random woman by the name Helen who claimed to be mother to Cubana's neonate child, promising her and the little babe a life time of enjoyment.


As all these went on, the people of the country watched with great shock and folded arms saying ,

"what manner of prosperous punishment is this? for the son of man Akpi came from a lower status to lay an accusation only to end up in a dungeon while a richer man did the same thing with twice as much vigor but had instead gotten more blessings?"

In one accord the locals admonished themselves saying Money is the principal thing and in all thy getting get enough money. Selah




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