₦airaland Forum

I'm happy she kept the pregnancy. That child needs love and care. what you're doing to the little baby is wrong please
Confess and plead for forgiveness from your wife. if you're not bold enough, talk to someone she respect to help you out.


goodluck

Gloriagee:
@OP, You used HER whenever u can sounds so degrading. Is she an object?

Sorry, what i meant to say was that I used to visit her whenever I can.

culf:
I'm happy she kept the pregnancy. That child needs love and care. what you're doing to the little baby is wrong please
Confess and plead for forgiveness from your wife. if you're not bold enough, talk to someone she respect to help you out.


goodluck

Noted thanks

KidDarkness:
Be grateful to God if your wife forgives you because it's going to be very difficult. Confession is a must , so brace up because a huge marital storm is ahead and you must do all you can to calm it. You and your wife should understand that the little girl is innocent so she must not be a victim of transferred aggression. For pulling such a stunt, I would make sure the young lady never sees or have a relationship with the daughter ever

This is not a stunt. The lady believes that the child will fare better with her father. Perhaps she is not able to feed herself or the child. Remember she held unto this child for years. If she had the resources to keep the child she would have kept it. I always tell my spouse "If ever we split up. immediately after my kids get their citizenship I do not mind dropping them with your sisters them because they will be treated as royalty (Some people in Nigeria are quietly and stupendously wealthy)"
You cannot blame this woman for wanting better for her child even if she never sees the child again

I feel sorry for the child, poor girl. Time heals, take responsibility and let ur wife know.
You will not regret it.

Orld777:
Six yrs ago I left my city to a different city for a greener pasture, I left behind my wife and 2 children. I was a faithful husband to my wife and used her whenever I can everything was peaceful. Then come 2018 I have had planned to return back to my city in 2018 ending because I have had saved a lot of money to start business over there. Then the devil came to tempt me by sending me this beautiful woman till now I don't know how I gave in to her because I have vowed all my life to never cheat on my wife. But this lady won me over. We started dating and always sleep with her with condoms on to make sure that she doesn't get pregnant. But I was shocked jsut three months into the relationship, she drop a bombshell that she was pregnant, I was confused and I asked her what about all the condoms that I have been using and there's no way she could be pregnant but she insisted that I was the father. I told her I wasn't ready for the baby and I am married all I could ever do for her is to give her the money to terminated but she refused. She wanted to keep the pregnancy so I told her to keep it at her own risk because I will have nothing to do with her or the baby. I gave her the money incase she change her mind and decided to opt for the abortion she can use the money. She left my place in tears and she blocked me. I didn't know see her again till I left the city back to my city, actually I knew her house but I didn't bothered to go look for her. It has been 2 years plus since I am back with my family and I have never told my wife anything and she has never found out about my affair too. Last week I was in my office ( I am self employee) to my suprised the lady I had an affair with show up with a small girl who just look like me first time seeing her I was in tears . I was in shocked  and started wondering how did she know my office I was angry what if my wife was there but I decided to keep my cool and listen to her. She said she was attending a funeral jsut 10 mins away from my place and she begged me to watch the child for her and she will be back in an hour. I asked her about the person who gave her my office address but she didn't respond she said she will tell me when she return back. She gave me her number to call her incase of any problem. Honestly I don't know how I have accepted to watch the child for her thinking that she will be coming in a hour like she said, but she never came back. Her number was not reachable she also gave me a wrong number. I was shattered and I didn't know what to do with the child, I was at my office until 10pm trying to figure out what to do with her. At the end I have to drop her at my cleaner house where she is now. My cleaner hasn't been coming to work because she is taking care of the child and I am restless because I have no idea what to do with her. I blamed the lady for everything when I have asked her and given her the money for the abortion and why did she choose to keep the pregnancy then later to abandoned her with me when she fully know that I never wanted her in the first place. What will I tell my wife and will she forgive and accept her that easily. I love my wife and kids so I don't want to this my illegitimate child issue to break my home. Please house advixe me.

There's no illegitimate child. Do not let her suffer or damage her psyche because if a mistake you made. None of this is her fault.

Orld777:
Six yrs ago I left my city to a different city for a greener pasture, I left behind my wife and 2 children. I was a faithful husband to my wife and used her whenever I can everything was peaceful. Then come 2018 I have had planned to return back to my city in 2018 ending because I have had saved a lot of money to start business over there. Then the devil came to tempt me by sending me this beautiful woman till now I don't know how I gave in to her because I have vowed all my life to never cheat on my wife. But this lady won me over. We started dating and always sleep with her with condoms on to make sure that she doesn't get pregnant. But I was shocked jsut three months into the relationship, she drop a bombshell that she was pregnant, I was confused and I asked her what about all the condoms that I have been using and there's no way she could be pregnant but she insisted that I was the father. I told her I wasn't ready for the baby and I am married all I could ever do for her is to give her the money to terminated but she refused. She wanted to keep the pregnancy so I told her to keep it at her own risk because I will have nothing to do with her or the baby. I gave her the money incase she change her mind and decided to opt for the abortion she can use the money. She left my place in tears and she blocked me. I didn't know see her again till I left the city back to my city, actually I knew her house but I didn't bothered to go look for her. It has been 2 years plus since I am back with my family and I have never told my wife anything and she has never found out about my affair too. Last week I was in my office ( I am self employee) to my suprised the lady I had an affair with show up with a small girl who just look like me first time seeing her I was in tears . I was in shocked  and started wondering how did she know my office I was angry what if my wife was there but I decided to keep my cool and listen to her. She said she was attending a funeral jsut 10 mins away from my place and she begged me to watch the child for her and she will be back in an hour. I asked her about the person who gave her my office address but she didn't respond she said she will tell me when she return back. She gave me her number to call her incase of any problem. Honestly I don't know how I have accepted to watch the child for her thinking that she will be coming in a hour like she said, but she never came back. Her number was not reachable she also gave me a wrong number. I was shattered and I didn't know what to do with the child, I was at my office until 10pm trying to figure out what to do with her. At the end I have to drop her at my cleaner house where she is now. My cleaner hasn't been coming to work because she is taking care of the child and I am restless because I have no idea what to do with her. I blamed the lady for everything when I have asked her and given her the money for the abortion and why did she choose to keep the pregnancy then later to abandoned her with me when she fully know that I never wanted her in the first place. What will I tell my wife and will she forgive and accept her that easily. I love my wife and kids so I don't want to this my illegitimate child issue to break my home. Please house advixe me.

The mistake has already happened

Just seat your wife down, be sobber and tell her exactly what transpired

You can't leave your child where she is presently forever

She will be disappointed in you but then assure her of your
loyalty

Continue to love and respect her

I have always told men to fear women

Just look at the simple trick she played on you and drop the child to the rightfull owner

Whenever a woman is silent, she is twice dangerous

That child will remind you of your so many things so keep her and intigrate her into your family

Love them all equally

You have discussions with your spouse about breaking up, like divorce and life after?

Wow!

Shokoloko:
This is not a stunt. The lady believes that the child will fare better with her father. Perhaps she is not able to feed herself or the child. Remember she held unto this child for years. If she had the resources to keep the child she would have kept it. I always tell my spouse "If ever we split up. immediately after my kids get their citizenship I do not mind dropping them with your sisters them because they will be treated as royalty (Some people in Nigeria are quietly and stupendously wealthy)"
You cannot blame this woman for wanting better for her child even if she never sees the child again

The discuss with your wife group think it's that easy to forgive and forget?
Hell no!

Majority of the ladies don't forgive nor forget. The same way a man will never forgive nor forget if he finds out his wife chested on him not to think of being pregnant for another man.


That woman will redefine that marriage and be ready for the emotional fight.

And she will naturally transfer aggression to that girl.

Take her to Nigeria.

Orld777:
Six yrs ago I left my city to a different city for a greener pasture, I left behind my wife and 2 children. I was a faithful husband to my wife and used her whenever I can everything was peaceful. Then come 2018 I have had planned to return back to my city in 2018 ending because I have had saved a lot of money to start business over there. Then the devil came to tempt me by sending me this beautiful woman till now I don't know how I gave in to her because I have vowed all my life to never cheat on my wife. But this lady won me over. We started dating and always sleep with her with condoms on to make sure that she doesn't get pregnant. But I was shocked jsut three months into the relationship, she drop a bombshell that she was pregnant, I was confused and I asked her what about all the condoms that I have been using and there's no way she could be pregnant but she insisted that I was the father. I told her I wasn't ready for the baby and I am married all I could ever do for her is to give her the money to terminated but she refused. She wanted to keep the pregnancy so I told her to keep it at her own risk because I will have nothing to do with her or the baby. I gave her the money incase she change her mind and decided to opt for the abortion she can use the money. She left my place in tears and she blocked me. I didn't know see her again till I left the city back to my city, actually I knew her house but I didn't bothered to go look for her. It has been 2 years plus since I am back with my family and I have never told my wife anything and she has never found out about my affair too. Last week I was in my office ( I am self employee) to my suprised the lady I had an affair with show up with a small girl who just look like me first time seeing her I was in tears . I was in shocked  and started wondering how did she know my office I was angry what if my wife was there but I decided to keep my cool and listen to her. She said she was attending a funeral jsut 10 mins away from my place and she begged me to watch the child for her and she will be back in an hour. I asked her about the person who gave her my office address but she didn't respond she said she will tell me when she return back. She gave me her number to call her incase of any problem. Honestly I don't know how I have accepted to watch the child for her thinking that she will be coming in a hour like she said, but she never came back. Her number was not reachable she also gave me a wrong number. I was shattered and I didn't know what to do with the child, I was at my office until 10pm trying to figure out what to do with her. At the end I have to drop her at my cleaner house where she is now. My cleaner hasn't been coming to work because she is taking care of the child and I am restless because I have no idea what to do with her. I blamed the lady for everything when I have asked her and given her the money for the abortion and why did she choose to keep the pregnancy then later to abandoned her with me when she fully know that I never wanted her in the first place. What will I tell my wife and will she forgive and accept her that easily. I love my wife and kids so I don't want to this my illegitimate child issue to break my home. Please house advixe me.

I don't think you need DNA here, you just confirmed the child looks like you. Pls just take responsibility of the innocent child after all you are financially capable sir.

OP, you have a very long journey ahead of you....
since you said you are in Senegal, I am assuming your daughter's mother is Senegalese, which also makes your daughter a Senegalese alongside a Nigerian. I believe the child's birth was registered, so you need to search out the woman and where the birth was registered as you have in custody a child that you can be accused of kidnapping even if your DNA matches.

Mindlog:
OP, you have a very long journey ahead of you....
since you said you are in Senegal, I am assuming your daughter's mother is Senegalese, which also makes your daughter a Senegalese alongside a Nigerian. I believe the child's birth was registered, so you need to search out the woman and where the birth was registered as you have in custody a child that you can be accused of kidnapping even if your DNA matches.

Thanks for your suggestion. It will be very tricky for me to do all that because I don't have much details about the mother and I don't even know the child surname or date of birth but I will try to do some research.

Orld777:
Thanks for your suggestion. It will be very tricky for me to do all that because I don't have much details about the mother and I don't even know the child surname or date of birth but I will try to do some research.

You must immediately go report to the police, provide them with the pictures of the woman, if you still have access to them and the phone number(s) she was using to communicate with you when you both were intimate partners because it is way beyond going to beg your wife in order to bring the child home....it is a police case.

Mindlog:
You must immediately go report to the police, provide them with the pictures of the woman, if you still have access to them and the phone number(s) she was using to communicate with you when you both were intimate partners because it is way beyond going to beg your wife in order to bring the child home....it is a police case.

Unfortunately I don't have any of it. On the day she drop off the child she gave me a number which was wrong. Have been calling the number with no avail. I believe she is somewhere heren in Dakar. she has been stalking me for a long time now that's why she had my office address because there is no way that she came to Dakar just to drop off the child. Can I still report to the police without any evidence?

Orld777:
Unfortunately I don't have any of it. On the day she drop off the child she gave me a number which was wrong. Have been calling the number with no avail. I believe she is somewhere heren in Dakar. she has been stalking me for a long time now that's why she had my office address because there is no way that she came to Dakar just to drop off the child. Can I still report to the police without any evidence?

What of the phone number(s) you used to communicate with her when the affair was going on, the number she blocked you from?

The child in your custody is enough evidence for the police. Be the first to visit the police and make sure your wife knows what is happening, before the police visits you.

Please change the illegitimate child on your title to my child out of wedlock.

gfon:
you guys shouting DNA,didn't you see when the OP said the kid looks like him.boss just take care of that kid,you never can tell of the future if u've got a president or governor with you. For your information condoms dey burst without you knowing.

female president? In Nigeria?

seanwilliam:
female president? In Nigeria?

lolz..boss make we give them small hope na

Go and do DNA test irrespective of whatever mark or the semblance you share.

Mindlog:
What of the phone number(s) you used to communicate with her when the affair was going on, the number she blocked you from?

The child in your custody is enough evidence for the police. Be the first to visit the police and make sure your wife knows what is happening, before the police visits you.

Please change the illegitimate child on your title to my child out of wedlock.

OK thanks once again.

Orld777:
OK thanks once again.

You are welcome.

aperture11:
You have discussions with your spouse about breaking up, like divorce and life after?

Wow!

We had issues like everything other couple and discussed an amicable divorce. (somehow we did not get around to divorcing )

Orld777:
Six yrs ago I left my city to a different city for a greener pasture, I left behind my wife and 2 children. I was a faithful husband to my wife and used her whenever I can everything was peaceful. Then come 2018 I have had planned to return back to my city in 2018 ending because I have had saved a lot of money to start business over there. Then the devil came to tempt me by sending me this beautiful woman till now I don't know how I gave in to her because I have vowed all my life to never cheat on my wife. But this lady won me over. We started dating and always sleep with her with condoms on to make sure that she doesn't get pregnant. But I was shocked jsut three months into the relationship, she drop a bombshell that she was pregnant, I was confused and I asked her what about all the condoms that I have been using and there's no way she could be pregnant but she insisted that I was the father. I told her I wasn't ready for the baby and I am married all I could ever do for her is to give her the money to terminated but she refused. She wanted to keep the pregnancy so I told her to keep it at her own risk because I will have nothing to do with her or the baby. I gave her the money incase she change her mind and decided to opt for the abortion she can use the money. She left my place in tears and she blocked me. I didn't know see her again till I left the city back to my city, actually I knew her house but I didn't bothered to go look for her. It has been 2 years plus since I am back with my family and I have never told my wife anything and she has never found out about my affair too. Last week I was in my office ( I am self employee) to my suprised the lady I had an affair with show up with a small girl who just look like me first time seeing her I was in tears . I was in shocked  and started wondering how did she know my office I was angry what if my wife was there but I decided to keep my cool and listen to her. She said she was attending a funeral jsut 10 mins away from my place and she begged me to watch the child for her and she will be back in an hour. I asked her about the person who gave her my office address but she didn't respond she said she will tell me when she return back. She gave me her number to call her incase of any problem. Honestly I don't know how I have accepted to watch the child for her thinking that she will be coming in a hour like she said, but she never came back. Her number was not reachable she also gave me a wrong number. I was shattered and I didn't know what to do with the child, I was at my office until 10pm trying to figure out what to do with her. At the end I have to drop her at my cleaner house where she is now. My cleaner hasn't been coming to work because she is taking care of the child and I am restless because I have no idea what to do with her. I blamed the lady for everything when I have asked her and given her the money for the abortion and why did she choose to keep the pregnancy then later to abandoned her with me when she fully know that I never wanted her in the first place. What will I tell my wife and will she forgive and accept her that easily. I love my wife and kids so I don't want to this my illegitimate child issue to break my home. Please house advixe me.

Tell her that you are about to adopt a little girl that lost her mother from your village

Just tell your wife . To be honest you are a very stupid man.

Thank God she didn't abort the baby

Mindlog:
What of the phone number(s) you used to communicate with her when the affair was going on, the number she blocked you from?

The child in your custody is enough evidence for the police. Be the first to visit the police and make sure your wife knows what is happening, before the police visits you.

Please change the illegitimate child on your title to my child out of wedlock.

Regardless of the fact that he already changed it, what exactly is the difference between an illegitimate child and a child born out of wedlock?

Tell your wife the truth.

OP, i don't even understand you. Your wife can leave you, weather you were upright or not, Your Children are your Children, no matter what. Bring your child home, your wife can pack out if she wants, but she will leave your other children behind.

Malawian:
OP, i don't even understand you. Your wife can leave you, weather you were upright or not, Your Children are your Children, no matter what. Bring your child home, your wife can pack out if she wants, but she will leave your other children behind.

You think it is by gra gra? They are living in Senegal and the woman (probably Senegalese) who had the child for him, left the child with him and disappeared, that alone involves the Senegalese Police and their child protection department and you think it is a government case that will be resolved within 24hrs, reason you are here saying the wife can pack out if she wants to.

Orld777:
Six yrs ago I left my city to a different city for a greener pasture, I left behind my wife and 2 children. I was a faithful husband to my wife and used her whenever I can everything was peaceful. Then come 2018 I have had planned to return back to my city in 2018 ending because I have had saved a lot of money to start business over there. Then the devil came to tempt me by sending me this beautiful woman till now I don't know how I gave in to her because I have vowed all my life to never cheat on my wife. But this lady won me over. We started dating and always sleep with her with condoms on to make sure that she doesn't get pregnant. But I was shocked jsut three months into the relationship, she drop a bombshell that she was pregnant, I was confused and I asked her what about all the condoms that I have been using and there's no way she could be pregnant but she insisted that I was the father. I told her I wasn't ready for the baby and I am married all I could ever do for her is to give her the money to terminated but she refused. She wanted to keep the pregnancy so I told her to keep it at her own risk because I will have nothing to do with her or the baby. I gave her the money incase she change her mind and decided to opt for the abortion she can use the money. She left my place in tears and she blocked me. I didn't know see her again till I left the city back to my city, actually I knew her house but I didn't bothered to go look for her. It has been 2 years plus since I am back with my family and I have never told my wife anything and she has never found out about my affair too. Last week I was in my office ( I am self employee) to my suprised the lady I had an affair with show up with a small girl who just look like me first time seeing her I was in tears . I was in shocked  and started wondering how did she know my office I was angry what if my wife was there but I decided to keep my cool and listen to her. She said she was attending a funeral jsut 10 mins away from my place and she begged me to watch the child for her and she will be back in an hour. I asked her about the person who gave her my office address but she didn't respond she said she will tell me when she return back. She gave me her number to call her incase of any problem. Honestly I don't know how I have accepted to watch the child for her thinking that she will be coming in a hour like she said, but she never came back. Her number was not reachable she also gave me a wrong number. I was shattered and I didn't know what to do with the child, I was at my office until 10pm trying to figure out what to do with her. At the end I have to drop her at my cleaner house where she is now. My cleaner hasn't been coming to work because she is taking care of the child and I am restless because I have no idea what to do with her. I blamed the lady for everything when I have asked her and given her the money for the abortion and why did she choose to keep the pregnancy then later to abandoned her with me when she fully know that I never wanted her in the first place. What will I tell my wife and will she forgive and accept her that easily. I love my wife and kids so I don't want to this my illegitimate child issue to break my home. Please house advixe me.

Have a DNA test done first to be sure the little girl is yours.

1. If you get a positive paternity test result, then that girl is your responsibility – forget about the woman who abandoned her with you and take good care of your child. Also inform your wife about everything, not because you want her to act as mummy but because it's the right thing to do.

2. If you get a negative paternity test result, take the child to the police – tell them a crazy ex of yours left the child with you and you don't know her whereabouts anymore. And since you're not the child's father, they will treat the the matter as a case of a missing child & child abandonment.

Orld777:
Thanks for your suggestion. It will be very tricky for me to do all that because I don't have much details about the mother and I don't even know the child surname or date of birth but I will try to do some research.

There's no proof that you kidnapped the little girl, don't let fearmongering get to you please.

Even if anyone accuses you of kidnap (highly unlikely), there's no proof of that simply because it never happened.

Relax yourself and go get a DNA test done.

He is in Nigeria I think.

descarado:
The discuss with your wife group think it's that easy to forgive and forget?
Hell no!

Majority of the ladies don't forgive nor forget. The same way a man will never forgive nor forget if he finds out his wife chested on him not to think of being pregnant for another man.


That woman will redefine that marriage and be ready for the emotional fight.

And she will naturally transfer aggression to that girl.

Take her to Nigeria.