₦airaland Forum

Ugmama:
Dear Nairalanders,

I trust we are doing well and keeping safe.
Lets come together and share minds and views on this topic.

I am yet to be married and planning to do so before am 33.

I understand to get married for a guy or lady is not easy, so many things must be in place, like your emotions, cash, house, car, job etc.

Without most of these, getting married is not easy for a guy.

The purpose of this topic is for us to share experiences and also motivate people into how good or things to expect or avoid during marriage.

Moreso, things to put in place before you work down the aisle.

Thank you and I expect your wonderful comments.

#stay safe #family #life

I was married at 27yrs.

My experience wasn't a pleasant one but thank God for sustaining me till date.

What I learnt was;

Don't rush into marriage if you are not emotionally, financially and psychologically prepared.

Involve God always.

Get married to your best friend,gist partner and someone you are attracted to and have a common interest.

Be forgiving and learn to over look irrelevant actions.i know sometimes females hormones tend to react and can be annoying. You need to have a lot of self control to avoid being violent , abusive or having extramarital affairs.

Be transparent and honest


Don't start what you can't continue. If there are intolerable behaviors you notice during dating ,tackle it before you settle down because it may continue or get worse.


Make sure you have a job or a good source of steady income that can pay your bills especially rent, feeding and other major expenses because when you start having kids the bills will increase. You need to plan ahead .


No third party and don't sleep over grudges and misunderstanding. Ensure you get it sorted fast.


There are no permanent rules to a happy marriage. It takes the two parties , Dedication, tolerance, maturity and God's guidance to make it work because no one is perfect. We all have our flaws and good sides.

Every Human change based on situations, circumstances and conditions.

Trust no one even yourself. How you act or react can either make or Mar you.

Ugmama:
But I still don't get it when one even has money job, house etc... Still not married.

Is it that they don't see anyone they love... Till 45yrs o

Single life can be very sweet. Some people enjoy it so much they wait till the very last minute till they get married. Once you start a family, huge responsibilities await you. Life will never be the same again.

Kriss216:
Night newspapers shouldn't have the luxury to select.

But plenty of them still do. Deal with it.

Hathor5:
Single life can be very sweet. Some people enjoy it so much they wait till the very last minute till they get married. Once you start a family, huge responsibilities await you. Life will never be the same again.

True talk though personally I don't wholistically enjoy being single. Lol

realtalk19:
I was married at 27yrs.

My experience wasn't a pleasant one but thank God for sustaining me till date.

What I learnt was;

Don't rush into marriage if you are not emotionally, financially and psychologically prepared.

Involve God always.

Get married to your best friend,gist partner and someone you are attracted to and have a common interest.

Be forgiving and learn to over look irrelevant actions.i know sometimes females hormones tend to react and can be annoying. You need to have a lot of self control to avoid being violent , abusive or having extramarital affairs.

Be transparent and honest


Don't start what you can't continue. If there are intolerable behaviors you notice during dating ,tackle it before you settle down because it may continue or get worse.


Make sure you have a job or a good source of steady income that can pay your bills especially rent, feeding and other major expenses because when you start having kids the bills will increase. You need to plan ahead .


No third party and don't sleep over grudges and misunderstanding. Ensure you get it sorted fast.


There are no permanent rules to a happy marriage. It takes the two parties , Dedication, tolerance, maturity and God's guidance to make it work because no one is perfect. We all have our flaws and good sides.

Every Human change based on situations, circumstances and conditions.

Trust no one even yourself. How you act or react can either make or Mar you.

Thank you very much.

Very insightful

Ugmama:
True talk though personally I don't wholistically enjoy being single. Lol

That's why it is hard for you to understand the people who wait long with marriage.

Hathor5:
That's why it is hard for you to understand the people who wait long with marriage.

Everything depends on our mindset.

HeyHey:
20 and 8months, hubby was 26.

Cut your coat according to your cloth. I avoided friends and even family with unrealistic/pressuring advice, why dont your husband do this, why dont your husband do that, tell him to do this etc.

Work hard, support the way you can dont leave everything for him to do. eg. I buy small basic things that one cannot really do without.
Im handy too, i fix and replace leaking taps, sockets. Na me dey on generator mostly because I feel he dey tired (person just come back from outside dey begin draw gen, yiish)when he is not he puts it on.

This is the little I do, especially when he is stressed or doesnt have money (when man no get money he character dey change, so be calm loving and supportive).

This is not to say we are not deeply flawed people oo, we have our moments. Just love, pray, respect each other, know your triggers and red buttons.

You were mentally ready then and even get brain pass dis mumus above 30 we have now. I guess it’s not really about the age. Your first line got me thinking , the part you said you avoid unrealistic people. God bless you Walahi

Ugmama

I see that your readers are not even answering the simple question you asked

Lostchild:
Ugmama

I see that your readers are not even answering the simple question you asked

Perhaps they have been rehearsing, now let's get to hear from them

Ugmama:
Perhaps they have been rehearsing, now let's get to hear from them

OK.
Let see