₦airaland Forum

ccollins:
be very careful young man, I would also advice you to visit apostle arome osayi church in markurdi so God can help you. A mother who patronizes witchcraft in any disguise to trap her children is evil. U better go n become spiritually stronger so your mom won't use you as chaff

maxkia:
Africa.. Mother bla bla . This is why Africa is backwards. Don’t put your mouth in what you don’t know . E pass African Magic . MY Story

harsysky:
I for swear for you, but the problem your mother put you too big. Why you go talk say na poor people pikin dey ride tyre? Something wey I do when I still dey small and palee dey very very alright then. That's the fun of my childhood as technology neva too dey for naija. Take time o

Sorry about what your mum is making you pass through. See it as a training and also one of those hurdles one has to overcome in the journey of greatness.

iamL:
We are know that's not true abt african mothers instead the opposite is the case.

How many children celebrate their fathers first before their mothers? How many adults children buys houses, cars etc for their dads first before their mum? How many people out there we tell u they want to make money so they can care for father?

We all know that african mothers are great compared to the male counterparts, this is not abt gender war.

Op should tell us the truth. Is he a liability? Is he an ingrate? Lazy? Has entitlement spirit because he is the first son? How does she treat his younger siblings? Natural stingy Even when he can support?

Women-hatters on this forum will always look for ways to bash women. I keep telling every single lady out there to strive never to marry a Nigerian-bred-man if they don't want to die young.

*Out of this thread*

NewDelhi:
Nigerians and their awkward mentality tho. Is his father not a man? Why do you people just reason like animals like this. Person called his father a man, that one too na crime.. No wonder this country is not moving forward.

NOETHNICITY:
This isn't about Africa rather it's about Islam wherein it's compulsory to take care of ones parents especially ones mother

Don't worry when you become a parent your children will feed you what you are feeding ur parents

judeokoyi:
May God not give us such a son like this OP that will write this non sense about his mother.

A woman his trying to mould and build you like an Alpha son but instead of him to proof himself to her, he's busy going about with so much negativities.
How will you get a good job with this attitude of yours?
The lady that will marry you will get ready for a competition of a life time because you won't be able to stand a woman that's doing well more than you.
Instead of you to use your father has a yards stick of a total gentleman and learn from him you still could't see because you are so blind.

wake up before depression taking over you.

Bobmarie:
Wow! This is my grandmother. Lol.

Mariangeles:
Okwa ya?








Yeah.

Ha na e nyekari ndi ebe 'ke ha nsopuru karikwa ndi ebe k'ozo.
But still...



Reminds me of my uncle's wife.




Gi e lefuru the red flags anya.
O wu that "carried away" m gwaga gi nu.




Watch how she changes when he starts to earn big.



O rikwahu mma otu ahu o.
It is better for a lady to start earning money before getting married.




Ndi mma ha chokwaranu I ma?
Right ha wu right ha. Akuko ndi ozo a gbasahu ha!



Nga I nyaga speed okwa ya? Werekwa wayo.
I fe a gaje olee?



Yeah. O foro m I de ule n'elu ya.

Bobmarie:
He won’t need his children to feed him because he won’t give birth to them to use them as retirement plans.

My children can get the Bleep out of my life when they’re old enough and live their lives for themselves and not me. I’m just a vessel.

The fact that you bleeped and gave birth does not mean you’re a god to anyone.

Anndrew:
u are a fool and a bastard..idiot...if u don't have anything to say..keep quiet..what a mumu,claiming righteousness with pastor and tradition...bastard

NewDelhi:
Nigerians and their awkward mentality tho. Is his father not a man? Why do you people just reason like animals like this. Person called his father a man, that one too na crime.. No wonder this country is not moving forward.

promiseland245:
I see you are a very active gambler, that explains alot about the origin of your frustration.
So I wouldn't battle words with you but wish you well in all your endeavours.
Do you a great weekend.

An old saying says: A Pig who calls you for a dance, intends to get you dirty.
I am not dancing with you today.

ayobamiJR:
Not all parents...for me, my kids owe me nothing. I'm not waiting for them to take care of me in my old age in any financial means..I just want them to honour me...I'd keep hustling to be financially stable at all the stages of my life. I owe them everything for bringing them into the world.

ccollins:
u really mean it... Tell me more

NOETHNICITY:
My father told me something when I was in JSS 2-3, I will never forget. That he will never depend on us for money when he grows old.
That day he was angry probably with my mum over what we knew nothing about. Then he was making alot of money for himself. And he said that to me and my elder sister since we were the only grown kids in my family then. Now he doesn't eat unless I send him money monthly. I have been doing this for more than 6yrs now. I don't wish to grow old and have to depend on my kids for money to eat, but I pray my kids grow to be more successful than I am and also take care of me when I grow old.

DispatcherLagos:
No perfect family. If I open mouth talk my own now you will thank God for having a mother like yours. However to get her thoughts out of my mind I had to travel and stay very far away from her. No calls or sms, we're both good, this is the fourth year of no communication

Jamest162:
Are u sure she's ur biological mother.
Coz every mum want wat's best 4 their children.

promiseland245:
I see you are a very active gambler, that explains alot about the origin of your frustration.
So I wouldn't battle words with you but wish you well in all your endeavours.
Do you q great weekend.

Bobmarie:
Long story short. She went spiritual some years ago when her son, my uncle wanted to take us and our mom (his sister) away from our abusive father and emigrate to America. The plans were in their final stage with all our passports ready.We were living with her at the time and she was quite vocal that over her dead body will her son take care another man’s children in another country. She kept different kind of fetish stuff in the open just to make us leave. She ended up throwing my mother and the rest of us on the streets. Me and my siblings were just teenagers.


As for my dad, lol. That one has thrown my younger ones (12,14,16 at the time) out just because he was looking for his soya milk and he felt they drank it. He later remembered that he kept in a bowl of water to defrost and went to pick the kids from the road where they were standing with their bags.

Just a tip of the iceberg of what went on in the past with those two.

Spherical77:
If my mother beat my dad daily you expected me to look away because it's none of my business right?

You tend to goof badly in the name of advice

Bobmarie:
Don’t compare your lovely parents with someone like mine. If you can read my above comment you will understand.


I would rather die than give my father a dime in this life. He would rather die than see any of us richer or more successful than him, apparently that will spoil the ‘hierarchy’ of the house. according to his words. Recently he scattered a business deal that would have made my younger brother a millionaire in hundreds, telling him he cannot be more successful than his father.

NOETHNICITY:
I understand you, but please if it's possible to ever pay anyone evil with good it's to ur parents
You can show ur father by your actions that you want to be a different parent to ur children. It's possible

Bobmarie:
I will be a different parent to my children yes.

But as for my Dad, he can go to hell. He feels exactly the same way about his kids too. Nothing special there.

NOETHNICITY:
What about ur mum, you didn't talk about her?

Bobmarie:
My mom is my god on Earth and will not lift a finger in her retirement. She pretty much changed our lives for good after leaving her husband and has always been exceptionally loving even when she faced extreme abuse from our dad she pretended to be okay just for us.

I owe any success in my life to her.

Blessedassuranc:
Funny enough I might be to think towards this. Personally I dont really be a beautiful relationship with my mum cos of my experiences with her while growing up.. Her attitude was my motivation for living the house earlier than expected via common entrance to boarding school. I made sure I took as much entrance exams as possible. Infact I used to come home telling my dad of the latest forma that were out for sales back then just to make sure I leave the house. I even had to take Jamb while I was in form 5 but my dad objected that I get to the university at such tender age. However I still left for university the next year immediately after my SSCE. Did same for nysc and never came back home after then but I realised that whenever she is happy with me, I ll be prosperous . However she makes it very difficult for me to please her. She keeps giving me every reason to dislike her and reminds me of the past .. It's well..

Blessedassuranc:
That isnt tough love. That woman is simply greedy. She has carried same entitlement attitude she displayed on her husband towards her kids.. Same self entitled attitude of nowadays ladies naa him dey worry that woman. I can imagine what her husband has been through. Make Op talk true, his mum has always been the one milking the home. I mean most of expenses made on family members have been on her...


For the same of his sanity he shld cut off from her

MrHenryFord:
I've been out of NYSC for almost 6 years now and to be honest, I am still struggling to make ends meet. I work where the pay is nothing to write home about and I have a small apartment I'm managing. It hasn't been easy at all. One of the problems being my mother who I see as a selfish and greedy person. She's this person that I can't discuss financial constraints with let's say an uncle or even my father in her presence. She'll tell them not to assist me that they're spoiling me, that those who are surviving on 20k monthly with wives and children don't have 2 heads.

As in I no get, I brought a business plan to my father. He's on the verge of assisting me and she convinced him not to help me and the man listened (he's a kind of person that even takes decisions from the woman. Sometimes I believe she must have jazzed him or something because honestly, that man doesn't know what he's doing again.

Funniest thing is that if she's the one the man wants to assist with even a million naira, she will be smiling happy. She no go talk say dem dey spoil her o.

I remember when my uncle sent money from abroad through her, she only gave me a tiny percentage . The man sent #500k to her to give me . She only gave me 30k and lied to the man she has given me the whole #500k. It was when I called the man to thank him I got to know. I just played along like I've received the whole sum inorder not to cause another problem between him and her.

Secondly, she always wants to rip where she didn't sow. I can use a pin to count how many favor she has done for me and my younger ones in this life but yet, she wants to make it an obligation to be taking care of her with the little I'm earning despite the fact that she's working and even earning x8 of what I earn.

Fine I'll give you when I have but no she no dey hear that one. Even wen I was doing NYSC in 2016. She called my grandma on phone and was crying that I refused to send her money.. I was dumbfounded. Me wey dey struggle in the streets of Kano with 19k alawee while she is working in Lagos earning more than 100k yet she still wants me to be sending money to her . It's not even that she contributes her salary to the house. It's my father that does everything. Even ordinary filling of gas cylinder na the man dey drop money.. It was so bad she started reporting me to all my uncles. Most of them who understood what I'm going through tried to talk to her but she wasn't having any of it

Thirdly, as I said in the first point above about my father being her puppet. My mother has a car she bought around 2014 and I can tell you she has never spent a dime on that car. Ordinary to use her money buy fuel na war. It's the man that fuels the car for her. If the car is faulty , she can abandon it for months until the man fixes it with is own money. When it spoils again, she abandons it again and the cycle continues. Meanwhile like I said, she works and earn above 100k monthly o. Sometimes I just keep wandering what she uses her money for because there's really nothing tangible she does to the house. (I have 3 siblings behind).

Lastly, this woman has been disturbing me to marry even as far back as when I was serving in 2016. Even till date, I keep telling her I'll settle when I am financially comfortable but she's always never ready to have any of that. Always using people like teachers and fuel attendants who earn less that 20k monthly and have wife and kids. Fine them get wife and born children but their wives are the type you see fighting with their neighbors and tearing their wrappers everyday. Their kids are the type you see on the streets driving tire naked , blowing banger up and down the streets and moving with bad boys.