If I were you, my focus would be on the boy.

If the girl wants to b a slay queen after much advice, then let her be. At her age some people are already graduates fending for themselves legally, women o.

Spoil that your brother. At 18, I was struggling with keyboard, if he is already making money with it then he is going places. His future is bright!

You should have started what I am about to suggest early but it's not too late.

You and your mum should arrange for her to start doing something to earn her some pay on her own so she can learn to be responsible.

Don't hit an adult.

Iyaebe:
Leave her alone, God will bless her with a man that'll more than take care of her.That's how all these oversabi elder brothers will not allow someone rest and have fun, they'll be behaving like monitoring spirit. Leave her alooooooooooooooone oooooooo.Raspberries what do you think?

You are a fool, a big one at that

for the fact that she relied on you financially then there is a big problem but the issue here is you can't advise her if you don't investigate the kind of friends she keep



ladies generally get more influence by their environment than guys, investigate the class of friends she keep before even making any move and for now stop using force on her, show her much love like before, make her more comfortable somewhat that she will be free to tell you everything, that's when your advise can sink into her head



she's already not just flirting, but also giving her lecturers her cookies with your fact that she don't like reading abi a lady that don't like reading and don't want to chose carryover as best friend surely have exchange rates

You need the mother's intervention, you have to tell the mother you are suspecting weird behaviours from the girl, both of you must sanction her financially, and try your best to find her a small job or business, by the time she has sweated to work out her money herself, she will stop all these

22 years old?

In Nigeria?

Way too late to be addressing her sense of entitlement. This is something you should have addressed 10 years ago.

Now all the options one can recommend to you will not work.

Option 1

Talk to her!

You already said she is not listening to you and will raise her voice. She also already has the tiktok/Instagram cultural life that she has to maintain.

Option 2

Stop giving her money/restrict how much you give her so she has to go and work.

As a tiktok/Instagram cultural life girl in Nigeria, one who is at her peak looks-wise (22 years old), you will just create an Olosho. She will find guys with money to fund her life while she lies on her back or blows.

Give up! Too late.

Imbecilicsamuel:
You should have started what I am about to suggest early but it's not too late.

You and your mum should arrange for her to start doing something to earn her some pay on her own so she can learn to be responsible.

Don't hit an adult.

It is too late.

MadamVanessa:


Okay

I hope if she starts gobbling dick you won't complain or get bitter with her. Because obviously, someone like your sister who hate working to get some income for herself, will immediately settled for dick gobbling to get money.

na today she dey gobble dick?

Brighton1:
My post might be lengthy, but Pls read because I need advice.

I've been living in Lagos for 5yrs now, even before the death of my father (R.I.P). I lost my dad 4yrs ago. I'm the eldest and I have two younger ones. I'm a contractor.

My mom and my siblings are based in ekpoma edo state. I call them regularly, I advice them, I send them money for up-keep, I visit home once in a while. I play both role of a father and elder bro to my siblings. I don't want them feel the absence of my father.

My construction team got a contract at Auchi, it was an opportunity for me to visit home often.

My younger sister is a 300L student in AAU. She is 22yrs old, she don't read, she's always on social media (tik tok & Co.) Nobody can touch her phone, if my lil bro wants to browse something important or play game with her phone, she will just be screaming at him as if Ogun is about to strike her... Don't touch my phone o, drop it down.

Even the phone (iPhone 7) I was the one who gave it to her when I bought my current phone (Samsung). I promised my lil bro he shouldn't worry, as soon as I get paid for the job I'm currently working on, I will get him a phone before I travel back to Lagos.

Okay, Yesterday I only said, now that ASUU is on strike, find something to do, get busy, learn a skill, even if it's fashion designing, make-up or catering.

She was just giving me flamzy excuses, and the annoying part is she will be raising her voice while talking to me. I almost used a belt to flog her if not for my mom that held me.

My father's house is a bungalow, and we have a tanent, Anytime I receive the house rent (200k yearly) I send everything to my mother. My mom would be like I should hold some for myself but I said NO, they need it more.

AAU school fees is now x4 compared to what I paid back then when I was there. Yet I'm the one providing 80% of her school fees while my mom 20%.

My Lil bro who's just 18 yrs old is more hardworking than her, he goes to my mom's shop to help her out, he's learning how to cut hair and he plays instruments very good (piano & bass guitar). He plays for a church that pays him 5k per week (he plays weds & sun for the church). I pray uniben grant him admission this year.

My father was a nice man, he disciplined us and his death won't change that. I want him to be proud of me wherever he is now.

Nairaland family, I need your advice. My sister depend so much on the money I give her. I don't want her to be a leech.

With such character from her, you are in a dicey situation.

Be very careful and firm with her... Although she's at a delicate age whereby doing the right thing will make her rebel, but most at times that's just what you need to do.

You're simply stupid. Do you mind to highlighting the "sense" that the girl made
I'm not even surprised at your stupidity sef, your username explains a lot about you. Na people like una make that nonsense geh talk that nonsense wen she talk so and to you the nonsense make sense because one iota of sense, I mean one drop of sense you nor get

GoodHardDick:


Again try get sense. That girl made lots of sense beyond your comprehension.

bosstim:
You're simply stupid. Do you mind to highlighting the "sense" that the girl made
I'm not even surprised at your stupidity sef, your username explains a lot about you. Na people like una make that nonsense geh talk that nonsense wen she talk so and to you the nonsense make sense because one iota of sense, I mean one drop of sense you nor get

Who's this fool. Come Let today be the first and last time you'll ever quote me again on Nairaland

Brighton1:
My post might be lengthy, but Pls read because I need advice.

I've been living in Lagos for 5yrs now, even before the death of my father (R.I.P). I lost my dad 4yrs ago. I'm the eldest and I have two younger ones. I'm a contractor.

My mom and my siblings are based in ekpoma edo state. I call them regularly, I advice them, I send them money for up-keep, I visit home once in a while. I play both role of a father and elder bro to my siblings. I don't want them feel the absence of my father.

My construction team got a contract at Auchi, it was an opportunity for me to visit home often.

My younger sister is a 300L student in AAU. She is 22yrs old, she don't read, she's always on social media (tik tok & Co.) Nobody can touch her phone, if my lil bro wants to browse something important or play game with her phone, she will just be screaming at him as if Ogun is about to strike her... Don't touch my phone o, drop it down.

Even the phone (iPhone 7) I was the one who gave it to her when I bought my current phone (Samsung). I promised my lil bro he shouldn't worry, as soon as I get paid for the job I'm currently working on, I will get him a phone before I travel back to Lagos.

Okay, Yesterday I only said, now that ASUU is on strike, find something to do, get busy, learn a skill, even if it's fashion designing, make-up or catering.

She was just giving me flamzy excuses, and the annoying part is she will be raising her voice while talking to me. I almost used a belt to flog her if not for my mom that held me.

My father's house is a bungalow, and we have a tanent, Anytime I receive the house rent (200k yearly) I send everything to my mother. My mom would be like I should hold some for myself but I said NO, they need it more.

AAU school fees is now x4 compared to what I paid back then when I was there. Yet I'm the one providing 80% of her school fees while my mom 20%.

My Lil bro who's just 18 yrs old is more hardworking than her, he goes to my mom's shop to help her out, he's learning how to cut hair and he plays instruments very good (piano & bass guitar). He plays for a church that pays him 5k per week (he plays weds & sun for the church). I pray uniben grant him admission this year.

My father was a nice man, he disciplined us and his death won't change that. I want him to be proud of me wherever he is now.

Nairaland family, I need your advice. My sister depend so much on the money I give her. I don't want her to be a leech.

there is a consequence for every actions...

She's being lazy and being rude. This is the two things I've noticed from your explanation.

Reduce her financial availability except the ones that is important, like school fees.
And as for the rude reply,leave hr with s resounding slap, and also the phone you bought for her. I hate when an elderly child behave like this. how do you intend to discipline your kids....

Enemyofpeace:
your reason is why she is what she is today, a spoilt child, who believes others must serve her

Spoilt child? There are Thousands of children that were pampered 10 times more than her and they aren't spoilt.

This is not a case of being a spoilt child, the issue is her environment, her friends. They have affected her mentality. That's what the OP needs to work on now.

Keep advising her and also be praying for her.

Great, I will suggest the op seize her phone, the phone is obviously one of her problem you should start disciplining her from there

GoodHardDick:
My brother, she's already a leech.

When a girl starts raising her voice at you just know that she has already started collecting dicks outside, Na why she dey get morale shout for u. Seize her phone and watch her senses come back to her.

cc

Brighton1

immortalcrown:
I see a slay queen in your family. It seems she was pampered for being the only daughter. She is the type that will use her pocket money to feed her boyfriend on campus.

The worst part is if you reduce the money you give her for upkeep, she will use insufficient fund as an excuse to flirt. Meanwhile, she is already flirting, probably with old men. My suspicion is based on her not being afraid of you, her refusing to acquire skills for financial independence, her social media addiction and how she guards her phone as if the phone is CBN database. Maybe her nudes and porns she exchanges with her bf are on the phone. If you keep giving her enough money, people will say you used money to spoil her.

But since every option has supporters and haters, you have to try different methods. After all, each option will attract both praise and criticism. Try a different method because repetition of the same method cannot produce varied results.

The new method I suggest is reducing her upkeep money. If you keep on giving her everything, she is the type that will take in for a poor boy hoping that you will feed her, the boy and the baby she will deliver.

Whats wrong with a girl feeding her boyfriend?

Iyaebe:
Leave her alone, God will bless her with a man that'll more than take care of her.That's how all these oversabi elder brothers will not allow someone rest and have fun, they'll be behaving like monitoring spirit. Leave her alooooooooooooooone oooooooo.Raspberries what do you think?

It is obvious op's sister needs good guidance hence his concern bringing the matter here.

Your sister needs advice for now because there's nothing you can do meanwhile can I chat you privately

Let her know the trajectory of her life. Her life, her choice. Plus you won't be responsible for her.

Johndagr8t:
she blong to the senseless gender, so wetin you expect..


check out she dey send nudes giv boys, Na why she dey keep phone

Your mom also belongs to the senseless gender.

MrBrownJay1:
a few mind resetting slaps and getting rid of her deluded phone will solve the problem ASAP!

A 22year old? Lol.

Brighton1:
My post might be lengthy, but Pls read because I need advice.

I've been living in Lagos for 5yrs now, even before the death of my father (R.I.P). I lost my dad 4yrs ago. I'm the eldest and I have two younger ones. I'm a contractor.

My mom and my siblings are based in ekpoma edo state. I call them regularly, I advice them, I send them money for up-keep, I visit home once in a while. I play both role of a father and elder bro to my siblings. I don't want them feel the absence of my father.

My construction team got a contract at Auchi, it was an opportunity for me to visit home often.

My younger sister is a 300L student in AAU. She is 22yrs old, she don't read, she's always on social media (tik tok & Co.) Nobody can touch her phone, if my lil bro wants to browse something important or play game with her phone, she will just be screaming at him as if Ogun is about to strike her... Don't touch my phone o, drop it down.

Even the phone (iPhone 7) I was the one who gave it to her when I bought my current phone (Samsung). I promised my lil bro he shouldn't worry, as soon as I get paid for the job I'm currently working on, I will get him a phone before I travel back to Lagos.

Okay, Yesterday I only said, now that ASUU is on strike, find something to do, get busy, learn a skill, even if it's fashion designing, make-up or catering.

She was just giving me flamzy excuses, and the annoying part is she will be raising her voice while talking to me. I almost used a belt to flog her if not for my mom that held me.

My father's house is a bungalow, and we have a tanent, Anytime I receive the house rent (200k yearly) I send everything to my mother. My mom would be like I should hold some for myself but I said NO, they need it more.

AAU school fees is now x4 compared to what I paid back then when I was there. Yet I'm the one providing 80% of her school fees while my mom 20%.

My Lil bro who's just 18 yrs old is more hardworking than her, he goes to my mom's shop to help her out, he's learning how to cut hair and he plays instruments very good (piano & bass guitar). He plays for a church that pays him 5k per week (he plays weds & sun for the church). I pray uniben grant him admission this year.

My father was a nice man, he disciplined us and his death won't change that. I want him to be proud of me wherever he is now.

Nairaland family, I need your advice. My sister depend so much on the money I give her. I don't want her to be a leech.

May God grant you wisdom on how to handle this your Sister.

By the way,can i manage in your construction team?i'm a fresh civil engineering graduate,just finished my service last yr,In Lagos as well.... nothing stable yet,still trying to get on the beat

I'm a bit skillful in civil engineering/structural design related softwares,Ms Excel as well...i can manage on site as well......

Your problem plenty

Prayfortheworld:
My sister is 24 she have thesame mentality with your sister and honestly is eating me up.

My sister has never worked before in her life, she ask my mom or me for money.. she can't buy anything for herself if you didn't buy it for her, everything she's wearing are mostly clothes i bought for her and she's still using the phone my mom bought for her 2018

I've adviced her but nothing dy enter her head. She's in higher institution
I go through her phone always she's a decent girl but she don't have that hustling spirit in her. I'm just scared for her because i don't want her to suffer in her marriage.
though she don't ask men for Money instead she ask me or my mom I'm tired the burden is too much. Someone that should be helping the family by now. Sometimes i just wish my mom gave birth to just me and our last born

you claim she still in school, how did you expect her to be helping the family, she should engage in runs right?

Lekan239:
you claim she still in school, how did you expect her to be helping the family, she should engage in runs right?

You dy craze no be her mate dy do a lot dy go school at the same time.
The family no even need her help make she dy help herself we no go complain