My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help - Family (4)

My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help - Family (4) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum › Nairaland General › Family › My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help (32569 Views)

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Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by blackboy2star(m): 12:03pm On Nov 30, 2022

I'm lost with this epistle... Man cannot comprehend

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by CEOKmotors: 12:04pm On Nov 30, 2022

Nwaotu10:
Weakling!
That's what you're for allowing your wife detect preferences in your own house!
A real man gives an order, and so it is!
Simp

So many stupid and foolish weaklings called men in this generation.

How can your wife dictates what happens in your home.

The idiot is coming here asking for advice, no go take charge of your home. Pussy ass man.

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by Nobody: 12:04pm On Nov 30, 2022

UnusualEmissary:
Sorry oo, does the promise involve that child being inside your house gan gan like your matrimonial home with your wife?

Can you not take care of that girl and not send her to her mother's relatives without her living in the matrimonial home of you and your current wife?

The promise you made and that child may be important but your wife is also important especially if she has had her own children for you.

Just think deeply please... Think of what you can do to protect both interests.

Be wise ooo!

U are even worst than the man's wife, at least she showed her true colours, How dare u look for a loophole in a promise u made to someone who has already passed!....

Ur words show u are not a trustworthy individual...I am sure if u where in the ops shoes u would have find some ways to break ur promise while convincing urself U are on d right track.....I am also sure u most be a liberal who loves to leaks western a##...

4 Likes

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by nerodenero: 12:07pm On Nov 30, 2022*

I believe you are doing well financially and if yes the presence of that child in your house might be the reason you are enjoying God's blessing and if otherwise, you never know what is in stock for you in the nearest future for the labour or sacrifices of love love towards the child. Remove her from your care and you might regret it. Let your word or promise be you bond. Keep to it, continue to make the necessary sacrifices and who knows the child might be the only middle pillar that might hold the family together in future.

May God direct you to do the right thing. Shalom!

4 Likes

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by sugaslim(m): 12:09pm On Nov 30, 2022

Richy4:
You have made the promise already, I won't break it if I was to be in a similar situation... Because the only home she knows is yours...the only father she knows is you... uprooting her from your home to another place might not be the best psychologically.....

I don't want to say what I thought of your wife out of respect.. but it's not pretty..I will even be afraid of what she Will be capable of doing as those kids grows older which is setting them against each other judging by her character... please find a fine ground to solve this problem and make sure that the innocent child was not mistreated...

I will also pay a visit to that my aunt on a fine Saturday with the kids and thank her in the presence of her husband for setting my house on fire.. if I was to be in your shoes

and I will also invite her children too and tell the married ones to come with their spouses so that they can see how wicked their mother/MIL is.

2 Likes

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by jimyjames(m): 12:09pm On Nov 30, 2022

UnusualEmissary:
Sorry oo, does the promise involve that child being inside your house gan gan like your matrimonial home with your wife?

Can you not take care of that girl and not send her to her mother's relatives without her living in the matrimonial home of you and your current wife?

The promise you made and that child may be important but your wife is also important especially if she has had her own children for you.

Just think deeply please... Think of what you can do to protect both interests.

Be wise ooo!

Even if the child of the first wife leaves , the second wife will turn the hate to the 3 remaining children of the first wife , she will never love the children of the first wife , with this type of hate

4 Likes

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by larrymoore(m): 12:09pm On Nov 30, 2022

Thank you for loving the Lady a your first child. May God give you the support you need. We need men of your traits to take many homeless children off the street.

2 Likes

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by Nobody: 12:10pm On Nov 30, 2022

ahnie:
Your wives just showed u her true colors.
What's her problem seff?
Oga pray she doesn't poison the child.

This's what I would do....she never dey ready to marry,it's either she calms down and act reasonable it better still oga pls kick her out of the house.

Pls no body should quote me

Sorry for the quote. Are you really a woman? Because this line of reasoning align towards man's manliness.

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by Crystalsweetnes(f): 12:11pm On Nov 30, 2022

[quote author=frozen70 post=118783716]This is a very tight situation corner

She just want to frustrate you so that your girl will leave, but she doesn't know that the presence of that girl in that house means a lot

I think you will put her in boarding school and she can home during holidays

Am not happy over your wife attitude and she is doing it on purpose

If you can afford to rent an apartment for her, you can go ahead but a mini flat should be OK so that you can handle her house rent

But I think you can ask her to return to her family pending when she wants the issue to be resolved

I don't know why she wants to traumatize your life just because of an innocent girl

Is nothing but wickedness

Op, I think you should go with this, let her go back to her parents house. If she truly loves you, she will not put you in a position to choose.
She should appreciate a man like you and help you keep the promise you made to your late wife.
Please always be on the look,that child's life is in danger both physical and spiritual.

2 Likes

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by Danisaint112(m): 12:11pm On Nov 30, 2022*

Gudfadah:
I haven't told her anything about my decision yet and I want to know if getting her own house will help the situation. This is where I need your advice nairalanders what do I do in this situation?

READ THIS IF YOU TRULY WANT TO SAVE YOUR MARRIAGE

OP don't ever send that girl out for any reason whatsoever. You mean after explaining to her the girl's mom predicament she still insisted that you send her out.

At this point I have to agree to Nairalanders view that she is indeed wicked. Because come to think of it she is not paying the bills?

The girl must be an obstacle to her for her to have made such wicked decision plus malteating the poor too. I can only imagine what you are going through right now.

About your decision; The decision you have made is right and the best for your family. Don't ever throw that girl out or you have sinned against God and man.

Remember you made a promise to her late Mom.

Although she might refuse to pack into the new apartment.

When she does that give this two options below.

Tell her you will either file for a divorce or you will marry another woman that would take care of your children. (Don't do it though I'm not in support of divorce especially when it doesn't involve issue of cheating neither am a fan of polygamy).

But make the threats to her and just cook up a fake preparation to carry out the threat.

You can do something like calling your lawyer and seeking for a divorce in front of her
or calling your family/village people telling them you have finally found someone (a woman) you think can take care of your children for you if made second wife.

Someone you feel your children are going to be in safe hands with. Make sure you do it in front of her (make the call in front of her and say it loud so she hears it).

If she tries to bring up an argument ignore her or better still leave the house or leave her immediately.

If she's reasonable. Trust me she will not only come back to her senses but apologize too. Women become loyal when they know they have a competition (Polygamy).

But if after all this she still doesn't buy the story and still insist you send the girl home.

Simply move into the new house you rented for her.

Yes, I know you're the man of the house and at such you ought not to leave your domain but sometimes you just got to take away pride and take certain decision in life for your mental wellbeing.

When loneliness and rejection from all corners hits her she will definitely come begging.

Aside you, the mental well-being of your daughter matters too. It's would be too bad if she starts experiencing this at this little state.

It will affect her mentally on the long run and even instigate hate into her mindset. She might hate you tommorow for not doing the right thing you know.

And bro, you don't know what she might become tommorow.

She needs someone that can fill that void in her life, someone that can not replace her mum but represent everything her mum is, someone that can take good care of her and show her motherly love not someone that will make her feel she is an outcast or a bastard.

From my experience and that of others I have come to discover that most women would oppress and dominate you at the slightest chance they get.

Especially when they see you a weakling by not curtailing their excesses.

Show her you are the man of the house.
Note: Don't ever hit her even if she is hitting the girl in front of you or decides hitting you. I believe their 1,001 ways to punish a woman without hitting her.

Like I also said before, I don't also support divorce unless it has reached the a chronic cheating and live & death situation.

I don't know your woman and don't know how you guys live over there but with her current stance if you feel she is the type that would poison this girl tommorow. Abeg ooo you know what to do. To avoid stories that touch.

But above all I pray that peace doesn't only returns to your home but may she (your wife) also realize the girl is her daughter too and should be treated as such.

Goodluck...

1 Like

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by Mftivi: 12:12pm On Nov 30, 2022

Gudfadah:
Good evening nairaland.

I am a married man and I have six children. When I met with my first wife she was a single mother of 1 girl she was a years 6 months we got married when she was 5 years old.
We had 3 children together making them 4 unfortunately we lost her in 2016 during the birth of our twins.

Before she passed on she asks me to promise her that if anything happened to her I should never send her daughter back to her family to experience the same thing she went through in there hands.
I have promised her that the child is mine and she will never go anywhere the day she will leave my house will be on her wedding day.
I have also promised her that nothing will happen to her and we will grow old together. Unfortunately we lost her and I have continued being a father to all four children and I have never treated my step daughter differently.

I have since remarried and we are blessed with twins. When I met with my current wife I didn't tell her that my step daughter is not my biological child she knew she was my first child.
She has been a part of me ever since she was 1 plus and I didn't think it was necessary telling my wife she was not my child.

She was treating all four children good until my wicked aunty has spill the beans which I have apologised for not telling her in the first and I have asked her to continue being a good mother she was before knowing the truth.
But she refused saying I didn't tell the truth and the child should go and leave with her mom family. I have explained to her the reason why she cannot stay with them to no avail and I ask her not to tell the child the truth but she has told her.

It wasn't easy for her knowing the truth she asks me if I will take her back to her mom people I said no. She is still my child and she will not go anywhere and I will resolve the problem very soon.

Unfortunately my wife has totally changed so much toward the child and I hate coming home seeing her crying all the time. She feel insecure in the house knowing that she is not the biological child of the house.

Talking to my wife was to no avail she has insist that the child must go back to her mother family or they will be not peace.

I reported the problem to her people nothing was done and we are still dealing with the same thing everyday.

Honestly speaking I hate being in such a messy situation but I will not send her back to her mom family she is my first child and I have made a promise to my late wife that the day the child will leave my house it will be the day she will get married.
Since my wife want her to leave and the child is already depresses.
I have come to conclusion I will not divorce her but I will rent a 2 bedroom apartment for her to be staying with the twins while I continue staying with the four children in my house I owe the house.

I haven't told her anything about my decision yet and I want to know if getting her own house will help the situation. This is where I need your advice nairalanders what do I do in this situation?

my brother she's wicked but it's a complicated issue now so not easy to say let your wife go, I'll resort to prayers over that spirit of wickedness instead especially because of all the children.

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by Pakwel(m): 12:12pm On Nov 30, 2022

Gudfadah:
Good evening nairaland.

I am a married man and I have six children. When I met with my first wife she was a single mother of 1 girl she was a years 6 months we got married when she was 5 years old.
We had 3 children together making them 4 unfortunately we lost her in 2016 during the birth of our twins.

Before she passed on she asks me to promise her that if anything happened to her I should never send her daughter back to her family to experience the same thing she went through in there hands.
I have promised her that the child is mine and she will never go anywhere the day she will leave my house will be on her wedding day.
I have also promised her that nothing will happen to her and we will grow old together. Unfortunately we lost her and I have continued being a father to all four children and I have never treated my step daughter differently.

I have since remarried and we are blessed with twins. When I met with my current wife I didn't tell her that my step daughter is not my biological child she knew she was my first child.
She has been a part of me ever since she was 1 plus and I didn't think it was necessary telling my wife she was not my child.

She was treating all four children good until my wicked aunty has spill the beans which I have apologised for not telling her in the first and I have asked her to continue being a good mother she was before knowing the truth.
But she refused saying I didn't tell the truth and the child should go and leave with her mom family. I have explained to her the reason why she cannot stay with them to no avail and I ask her not to tell the child the truth but she has told her.

It wasn't easy for her knowing the truth she asks me if I will take her back to her mom people I said no. She is still my child and she will not go anywhere and I will resolve the problem very soon.

Unfortunately my wife has totally changed so much toward the child and I hate coming home seeing her crying all the time. She feel insecure in the house knowing that she is not the biological child of the house.

Talking to my wife was to no avail she has insist that the child must go back to her mother family or they will be not peace.

I reported the problem to her people nothing was done and we are still dealing with the same thing everyday.

Honestly speaking I hate being in such a messy situation but I will not send her back to her mom family she is my first child and I have made a promise to my late wife that the day the child will leave my house it will be the day she will get married.
Since my wife want her to leave and the child is already depresses.
I have come to conclusion I will not divorce her but I will rent a 2 bedroom apartment for her to be staying with the twins while I continue staying with the four children in my house I owe the house.

I haven't told her anything about my decision yet and I want to know if getting her own house will help the situation. This is where I need your advice nairalanders what do I do in this situation?

Bros bros.. You be watin them dey call real man..
Bros. You see say nah 3 bros I don call you abi ? That's because. You make me proud.
Stand your ground. Don't change your love for that child. As for your wife, the worst will happen..
She's very wicked oh. See why I dey fear this marriage. A woman can fake it for you. But don't give up. If you need who to help you come pack her things from your house let me know..

But that girl is going no where. You are get only family. Call me when you ready pack her things.. I still fit help you find the house

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by BOZZKJ: 12:12pm On Nov 30, 2022

Gudfadah:
I have come to conclusion I will not divorce her but I will rent a 2 bedroom apartment for her to be staying with the twins while I continue staying with the four children in my house I owe the house.

I totally agree sir, her (your second wife) stay in that house will affect that innocent girl psychologically. She may harm the poor girl eventually.

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by sorepco(m): 12:12pm On Nov 30, 2022

Sorry for your loss man. I can still feel the pain of losing ur 1st wife in yourvoice. The mistake has been made already by not telling your wife about this child.

However u will blame the 2 of your for your lack of respect towards one another.

Try telling your wife about your intentions towards her. If she refuses to change then implement your decision! After telling her you should note that that particular child shall see 'Shege' in your house if you later decide against getting her an apartment...

Goodluck man

Gudfadah:
Good evening nairaland.

I am a married man and I have six children. When I met with my first wife she was a single mother of 1 girl she was a years 6 months we got married when she was 5 years old.
We had 3 children together making them 4 unfortunately we lost her in 2016 during the birth of our twins.

Before she passed on she asks me to promise her that if anything happened to her I should never send her daughter back to her family to experience the same thing she went through in there hands.
I have promised her that the child is mine and she will never go anywhere the day she will leave my house will be on her wedding day.
I have also promised her that nothing will happen to her and we will grow old together. Unfortunately we lost her and I have continued being a father to all four children and I have never treated my step daughter differently.

I have since remarried and we are blessed with twins. When I met with my current wife I didn't tell her that my step daughter is not my biological child she knew she was my first child.
She has been a part of me ever since she was 1 plus and I didn't think it was necessary telling my wife she was not my child.

She was treating all four children good until my wicked aunty has spill the beans which I have apologised for not telling her in the first and I have asked her to continue being a good mother she was before knowing the truth.
But she refused saying I didn't tell the truth and the child should go and leave with her mom family. I have explained to her the reason why she cannot stay with them to no avail and I ask her not to tell the child the truth but she has told her.

It wasn't easy for her knowing the truth she asks me if I will take her back to her mom people I said no. She is still my child and she will not go anywhere and I will resolve the problem very soon.

Unfortunately my wife has totally changed so much toward the child and I hate coming home seeing her crying all the time. She feel insecure in the house knowing that she is not the biological child of the house.

Talking to my wife was to no avail she has insist that the child must go back to her mother family or they will be not peace.

I reported the problem to her people nothing was done and we are still dealing with the same thing everyday.

Honestly speaking I hate being in such a messy situation but I will not send her back to her mom family she is my first child and I have made a promise to my late wife that the day the child will leave my house it will be the day she will get married.
Since my wife want her to leave and the child is already depresses.
I have come to conclusion I will not divorce her but I will rent a 2 bedroom apartment for her to be staying with the twins while I continue staying with the four children in my house I owe the house.

I haven't told her anything about my decision yet and I want to know if getting her own house will help the situation. This is where I need your advice nairalanders what do I do in this situation?

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by idu1(m): 12:12pm On Nov 30, 2022

Very wicked woman. No respect for the dead.

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by Blacksavage(m): 12:13pm On Nov 30, 2022

Nawa oooh
Problem everywhere
This marriage of thing just tire person

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by VIKTO83(m): 12:14pm On Nov 30, 2022

Wetin b today's date?
Go mark d date for ur calendar.
THAT YOUR WIFE GO EXTEND THIS HER ATTITUDE TO D REST OF YOUR KIDS FROM UR LATE WIFE. SHE IS JUST USING THIS GIRL TO TEST-RUN HER PLANS AND TO SEE HOW U WILL REACT.
So your reaction now will determine how and when she will dish u the more sumptuous meal in her pot of vawulence

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by Pakwel(m): 12:15pm On Nov 30, 2022

jimyjames:
Even if the child of the first wife leaves , the second wife will turn the hate to the 3 remaining children of the first wife , she will never love the children of the first wife , with this type of hate

So so true.the girl is the first abstactle. Bros save your kids oh.. that lady will soon show you something

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by LilMissFavvy(f): 12:16pm On Nov 30, 2022*

Never send the girl away, pls don't. Remember you made a promise to your wife on her death bed. That girl will grow up and leave home for secondary School and university, it's only a matter of few years. Save her from affliction and don't send her back. I didn't see the exact age of the child, but I believe if you give her 15yrs of your life as her father, she will grow up into a responsible woman, and she will be forever grateful to you. If the pressure from your wife becomes too much for you, then you can sending her on holidays to your close relative, someone you trust.

It's sad your aunt already told her she doesn't belong there, so you can be sending her on holidays to any good relative.

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by royalamour(m): 12:17pm On Nov 30, 2022

Best thing is to send the wicked wife away forever.

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by larrymoore(m): 12:17pm On Nov 30, 2022

Elsueno:
U are even worst than the man's wife, at least she showed her true colours, How dare u look for a loophole in a promise u made to someone who has already passed!....

Ur words show u are not a trustworthy individual...I am sure if u where in the ops shoes u would have find some ways to break ur promise while convincing urself U are on d right track.....I am also sure u most be a liberal who loves to leaks western a##...

you are on point

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by Burgerlomo: 12:17pm On Nov 30, 2022

I don't know the reason why your so called wife can't leave the poor girl alone, it's just a matter of time before she will start to maltreat the other kids just watch

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by sageer1706(m): 12:18pm On Nov 30, 2022

The truth is she hate all the four kids not just the girl alone, she don’t want to display the hatred on four of them, she’s just using the hatred of four of them on the girl

1 Like

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by Kavod: 12:19pm On Nov 30, 2022

Gudfadah:
Good evening nairaland.

I am a married man and I have six children. When I met with my first wife she was a single mother of 1 girl she was a years 6 months we got married when she was 5 years old.
We had 3 children together making them 4 unfortunately we lost her in 2016 during the birth of our twins.

Before she passed on she asks me to promise her that if anything happened to her I should never send her daughter back to her family to experience the same thing she went through in there hands.
I have promised her that the child is mine and she will never go anywhere the day she will leave my house will be on her wedding day.
I have also promised her that nothing will happen to her and we will grow old together. Unfortunately we lost her and I have continued being a father to all four children and I have never treated my step daughter differently.

I have since remarried and we are blessed with twins. When I met with my current wife I didn't tell her that my step daughter is not my biological child she knew she was my first child.
She has been a part of me ever since she was 1 plus and I didn't think it was necessary telling my wife she was not my child.

She was treating all four children good until my wicked aunty has spill the beans which I have apologised for not telling her in the first and I have asked her to continue being a good mother she was before knowing the truth.
But she refused saying I didn't tell the truth and the child should go and leave with her mom family. I have explained to her the reason why she cannot stay with them to no avail and I ask her not to tell the child the truth but she has told her.

It wasn't easy for her knowing the truth she asks me if I will take her back to her mom people I said no. She is still my child and she will not go anywhere and I will resolve the problem very soon.

Unfortunately my wife has totally changed so much toward the child and I hate coming home seeing her crying all the time. She feel insecure in the house knowing that she is not the biological child of the house.

Talking to my wife was to no avail she has insist that the child must go back to her mother family or they will be not peace.

I reported the problem to her people nothing was done and we are still dealing with the same thing everyday.

Honestly speaking I hate being in such a messy situation but I will not send her back to her mom family she is my first child and I have made a promise to my late wife that the day the child will leave my house it will be the day she will get married.
Since my wife want her to leave and the child is already depresses.
I have come to conclusion I will not divorce her but I will rent a 2 bedroom apartment for her to be staying with the twins while I continue staying with the four children in my house I owe the house.

I haven't told her anything about my decision yet and I want to know if getting her own house will help the situation. This is where I need your advice nairalanders what do I do in this situation?

OGA NOTHING I HATE PASS MAN WHEN WEAK!!!!! SEE WETIN MAN DE OPEN MOUTH TALK.... NOW YOU CALLED YOUR AUNTY WICKED, THAT'S IS TRUE AND SO IS YOUR WIFE. SEE EVIL WOMEN? THEM MUST MAKE SURE SAY THEIR FELLOW WOMEN NOR PROGRESS, E GET WETIN YOUR LATE WIFE SEE FOR HER DAUGHTER FUTURE AND THAT NA WETIN YOUR AUNTY AND YOUR WIFE SEE AND THEM NOR WANT MAKE SHE SHINE.... YOUR WIFE AND AUNTY NA WINCH

2 Likes

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by Streetmovement(m): 12:19pm On Nov 30, 2022

Wotoporiously cool

speaking

Op, no vex o but your wife na mumu

Who keeps malice with the dead? Your guess is as good as mine

You better man up or man down

Your choice

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by dawnomike(m): 12:20pm On Nov 30, 2022

Gudfadah:
Good evening nairaland.

I am a married man and I have six children. When I met with my first wife she was a single mother of 1 girl she was a years 6 months we got married when she was 5 years old.
We had 3 children together making them 4 unfortunately we lost her in 2016 during the birth of our twins.

Before she passed on she asks me to promise her that if anything happened to her I should never send her daughter back to her family to experience the same thing she went through in there hands.
I have promised her that the child is mine and she will never go anywhere the day she will leave my house will be on her wedding day.
I have also promised her that nothing will happen to her and we will grow old together. Unfortunately we lost her and I have continued being a father to all four children and I have never treated my step daughter differently.

I have since remarried and we are blessed with twins. When I met with my current wife I didn't tell her that my step daughter is not my biological child she knew she was my first child.
She has been a part of me ever since she was 1 plus and I didn't think it was necessary telling my wife she was not my child.

She was treating all four children good until my wicked aunty has spill the beans which I have apologised for not telling her in the first and I have asked her to continue being a good mother she was before knowing the truth.
But she refused saying I didn't tell the truth and the child should go and leave with her mom family. I have explained to her the reason why she cannot stay with them to no avail and I ask her not to tell the child the truth but she has told her.

It wasn't easy for her knowing the truth she asks me if I will take her back to her mom people I said no. She is still my child and she will not go anywhere and I will resolve the problem very soon.

Unfortunately my wife has totally changed so much toward the child and I hate coming home seeing her crying all the time. She feel insecure in the house knowing that she is not the biological child of the house.

Talking to my wife was to no avail she has insist that the child must go back to her mother family or they will be not peace.

I reported the problem to her people nothing was done and we are still dealing with the same thing everyday.

Honestly speaking I hate being in such a messy situation but I will not send her back to her mom family she is my first child and I have made a promise to my late wife that the day the child will leave my house it will be the day she will get married.
Since my wife want her to leave and the child is already depresses.
I have come to conclusion I will not divorce her but I will rent a 2 bedroom apartment for her to be staying with the twins while I continue staying with the four children in my house I owe the house.

I haven't told her anything about my decision yet and I want to know if getting her own house will help the situation. This is where I need your advice nairalanders what do I do in this situation?

I support your plan...

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by tiswell(m): 12:20pm On Nov 30, 2022

Gudfadah:
Good evening nairaland.

I am a married man and I have six children. When I met with my first wife she was a single mother of 1 girl she was a years 6 months we got married when she was 5 years old.
We had 3 children together making them 4 unfortunately we lost her in 2016 during the birth of our twins.

Before she passed on she asks me to promise her that if anything happened to her I should never send her daughter back to her family to experience the same thing she went through in there hands.
I have promised her that the child is mine and she will never go anywhere the day she will leave my house will be on her wedding day.
I have also promised her that nothing will happen to her and we will grow old together. Unfortunately we lost her and I have continued being a father to all four children and I have never treated my step daughter differently.

I have since remarried and we are blessed with twins. When I met with my current wife I didn't tell her that my step daughter is not my biological child she knew she was my first child.
She has been a part of me ever since she was 1 plus and I didn't think it was necessary telling my wife she was not my child.

She was treating all four children good until my wicked aunty has spill the beans which I have apologised for not telling her in the first and I have asked her to continue being a good mother she was before knowing the truth.
But she refused saying I didn't tell the truth and the child should go and leave with her mom family. I have explained to her the reason why she cannot stay with them to no avail and I ask her not to tell the child the truth but she has told her.

It wasn't easy for her knowing the truth she asks me if I will take her back to her mom people I said no. She is still my child and she will not go anywhere and I will resolve the problem very soon.

Unfortunately my wife has totally changed so much toward the child and I hate coming home seeing her crying all the time. She feel insecure in the house knowing that she is not the biological child of the house.

Talking to my wife was to no avail she has insist that the child must go back to her mother family or they will be not peace.

I reported the problem to her people nothing was done and we are still dealing with the same thing everyday.

Honestly speaking I hate being in such a messy situation but I will not send her back to her mom family she is my first child and I have made a promise to my late wife that the day the child will leave my house it will be the day she will get married.
Since my wife want her to leave and the child is already depresses.
I have come to conclusion I will not divorce her but I will rent a 2 bedroom apartment for her to be staying with the twins while I continue staying with the four children in my house I owe the house.

I haven't told her anything about my decision yet and I want to know if getting her own house will help the situation. This is where I need your advice nairalanders what do I do in this situation?

whose name does she(your step daughter) bear?

These issues are delicate and complicated, but just be wise and smart so your wife don't end up harming you,cos emotions can always make women act before the think(talking from experience ).

Please,continue to take of the girl till she reaches a certain age,then enrol her in a boarding school, then you would have solved 90% of your problems.

Do not rent any apartment for your wife outside your matrimonial home just because of this.
She may poison you or the girl,and that means you eventually losing all that you have fought so hard to protect.
Be wise baba!

Ignore most of these underage boys and girls advice here,as most of them are yet living off their parents and has not seen the true reality of life yet.

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by sparta191(m): 12:22pm On Nov 30, 2022

Honestly whatever is happening now is great In my opinion. what if you got sick, physically impaired, or financially destabilize, you think your wife will be there for your kids? Don't need to be a magician to know the answer to that. Already she made the little ones to see their elder sis as an outsider. Its called divide and conquer. You came up with a very nice theory on how to solve your challenges but it won't still work cause last last you'll compromise after the kids ain't eating well for some weeks. Sometimes love ain't enough, respect is very pivotal in any relationship and clearly you ain't getting it from her. As for your aunt shenk the living day light out of her, no be everyone you need the smile with abeg. One of this days she'll tell you to choose between her kids and your other kids and you'll know you're bleeped. Make she go her papa house for like two months go cool off if her body go calm down

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Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by Awoleesu(m): 12:22pm On Nov 30, 2022

There are a thousand ways to kill a mosquito...

Dear OP,
Do you have your own relatives who may be willing to have that child live with them?

You may also wish to ask your wife a soul-searching question - if she dies and leaves her twins behind, and you marry a third time. Would she wish her successor treat her own children the way she's treated your foster child?

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by Richy4(m): 12:24pm On Nov 30, 2022

blackboy2star:
I'm lost with this epistle... Man cannot comprehend

Let me help you out..
<<OP married a single mum with one kid ( a Daughter)..
<< The marriage produced three kids.. plus the one she came with 4
<< OP's wife died in the process of child birth...on her dying bed, she made OP promise her not to send her daughter to her biological father
<< OP agreed..
<< As time went by Op got married again and had twins with the new wife..
<< He did not reveal the identity of the daughter that she promised...
<<A busybody Aunt came and revealed the secret to the new wife..
<< The wife said that op will not have peace till she send the girl away back to her biological father...
<< does that make sense?

Re: My Wife Hates My Step-Daughter. Please Help by Franklystein: 12:25pm On Nov 30, 2022

Don't turn against that child, send her to a boarding school, don't be surprised she'll turn up more successful than the other pampered children you have, that's nature for you, it'll fight for her since she has no one, how woman wey you carry your hand marry go dey dominate you for your own house, are you a weakling? Give that wicked woman your terms, if she can't abide by it let her leave.

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