My hubby cheated and has been begging me to forgive him but i can't find it in my mind to cos the messages and everything i saw really messed me up... never knew i could feel this way
Please I'll welcome Ur advice and bashing and if you also have a
Marriage counselor please share his or her number with me.. thanks.

some do, others dont.... it all depends on A) who you are and B) how desperate you are to stay with that unfaithful/disrespectful/dishonest/deceitful partner of yours.

I believe you are a christian. The Bible says to heir is man ......, Please find it in your heart to do forgive him if you see that he is genuinely remorseful.

Cheating is very irritating , I can’t even imagine a husband coming back to touch me after going out to exchange fluid with another woman, these acts are dirty and I get irritated so easily, even if I forgive something will definitely be gone because I won’t be free and open to him again. Forgive him if you can

He's deceitful i agree.....cos this is someone i share all my inner thoughts with...he was my Best friend,gist partner and everything.

4reala:
I believe you are a christian. The Bible says to heir is man ......, Please find it in your heart to do forgive him if you see that he is genuinely remorseful.

In the same Bible, it is written that God will not hold it against OP if she forgives him and then leaves him to marry another in his stead.

Make una dey leave Bible out of these and other things abeg!

Omobithousand:
My hubby cheated and has been begging me to forgive him but i can't find it in my mind to cos the messages and everything i saw really messed me up... never knew i could feel this way
Please I'll welcome Ur advice and bashing and if you also have a
Marriage counselor please share his or her number with me.. thanks.

Some people do some people don't it all depends on what type of person you are. Nobody will give you the perfect answer here it's you who will know what you want you want to do.

Forgiveness is easy if the partner feel remorse and stop the act. But if it's a continuous act and constant pleade for forgiveness, then count me out

Omobithousand:
My hubby cheated and has been begging me to forgive him but i can't find it in my mind to cos the messages and everything i saw really messed me up... never knew i could feel this way
Please I'll welcome Ur advice and bashing and if you also have a
Marriage counselor please share his or her number with me.. thanks.

truth be told, it won’t stop. Majority of cheats go back to their old ways. Just follow your heart

Omobithousand:
My hubby cheated and has been begging me to forgive him but i can't find it in my mind to cos the messages and everything i saw really messed me up... never knew i could feel this way
Please I'll welcome Ur advice and bashing and if you also have a
Marriage counselor please share his or her number with me.. thanks.

Its your decision to make, if you can forgive and let go, then fine, but if you can't, well. its not your fault, even Bible permit divorce if one partner cheated.
You shouldn't make any decision now pls, just calm down, calm down first.

culf:


Its your decision to make, if you can forgive and let go, then fine, but if you can't, well. its not your fault, even Bible permit divorce if one partner cheated.
You shouldn't make any decision now pls, just calm down, calm down first.

Thanks i promise not to make any decisions now

Omobithousand:


Thanks i promise not to make any decisions now

Good, just take your time and may God lead you.

Omobithousand:
My hubby cheated and has been begging me to forgive him but i can't find it in my mind to cos the messages and everything i saw really messed me up... never knew i could feel this way
Please I'll welcome Ur advice and bashing and if you also have a
Marriage counselor please share his or her number with me.. thanks.

I guess you are finding it hard to forgive him, well I don’t what it’s like to be cheated on. Just try find a place in your heart to forgive him, but if you can’t forgive him it’s better you dissolve the marriage to ease yourself the daily pain of seeing him cheat on you.

talk2hb1:

I guess you are finding it hard to forgive him, well I don’t what it’s like to be cheated on. Just try find a place in your heart to forgive him, but if you can’t forgive him it’s better you dissolve the marriage to ease yourself the daily pain of seeing him cheat on you.

This here is balanced ... making sure Op is aware that she doesn't have to sit with it if she can't handle it.

What was the situation in your marriage like? Was the home conducive to both of you? Where your emotional, sexual and compatibility needs being met? Did one partner feel neglected? I understand you are feeling very hurt right now. But what you need right now is answers not thinking of forgiveness or whether you want to leave your marriage. You need answers from your spouse. How did your marriage get to the point of him cheating.

Trust me, unless the underlying issue is addressed, your husband may still cheat again should you decide to stay married.

Omobithousand:
My hubby cheated and has been begging me to forgive him but i can't find it in my mind to cos the messages and everything i saw really messed me up... never knew i could feel this way
Please I'll welcome Ur advice and bashing and if you also have a
Marriage counselor please share his or her number with me.. thanks.

At this stage what is important to you is your happiness

The more you get angry the worst it will affect your mind and body

So forgive him and move on because he may likely repeat similar thing in no distance time

If you do to forgive him to you will get hurt the more and he will not feel the pains of you being hurt

Many women are not gonna like what I am about to type.

But before you get married to anyone you have to check for red flags, and certain patterns or behaviours. and if these are red flags you can live with for the rest of your life.

We all infact have red flags but you have to see if you can live with this for the rest of your life or not, the problem with most people especially women is that they think these things will changes after marriage or that the person loves you so they will change no nobody changed just because they loves you.


So before you rush into this thing called marriage think, study and don’t rush just to settled down or because you are desperate because marriage is not like dating where you can just up and leave because now you are not happy. You are ripping your whole family apart especially if you have kids.


This is why there are so many divorces nowadays because people are rushing into it and ignoring all the red flags thinking marriage will change their person. No it wouldn’t.




I really can’t give you a solution because I am not in your shoes, so you have to take this decision by yourself. You have to think of all the pros and cons of leaving this man and decide. So ask yourself,
how is this man with you? Is he a great husband? a great provider? and only the cheating has been his down fault so far? Can you trust him again? Are you willing to look pass this?

Ultimately the decision is yours and yours alone because we are not there with you and him behind closed doors.

Good luck.

Omobithousand:
My hubby cheated and has been begging me to forgive him but i can't find it in my mind to cos the messages and everything i saw really messed me up... never knew i could feel this way
Please I'll welcome Ur advice and bashing and if you also have a
Marriage counselor please share his or her number with me.. thanks.

Ok oooo, leave ur husband and become single mother, afterward you can now become side chick for married men.

Rokiat:
Many women are not gonna like what I am about to type.

But before you get married to anyone you have to check for red flags, and certain patterns or behaviours. and if these are red flags you can live with for the rest of your life.

We all infact have red flags but you have to see if you can live with this for the rest of your life or not, the problem with most people especially women is that they think these things will changes after marriage or that the person loves you so they will change no nobody changed just because they loves you.


So before you rush into this thing called marriage think, study and don’t rush just to settled down or because you are desperate because marriage is not like dating where you can just up and leave because now you are not happy. You are ripping your whole family apart especially if you have kids.


This is why there are so many divorces nowadays because people are rushing into it and ignoring all the red flags thinking marriage will change their person. No it wouldn’t.




I really can’t give you a solution because I am not in your shoes, so you have to take this decision by yourself. You have to think of all the pros and cons of leaving this man and decide. So ask yourself,
how is this man with you? Is he a great husband? a great provider? and only the cheating has been his down fault so far? Can you trust him again? Are you willing to look pass this?

Ultimately the decision is yours and yours alone because we are not there with you and him behind closed doors.

Good luck.

I cherish ur advice, but hope you know, sometimes, new friends/colleagues, new job, financial progress, overnight fame,etc do influence husband/wife and make him/her does what he/she not known for from Adam?


Husband can start drinking/smoking even though he is not doing them before.

Husband can change religion.

Wife may start attending parties.

Wife may start going to babalawo places.

Jobless wife might get job in which salary triple husband.

Husband may loose job.

All these as a result of influences and not behaviors from very beginning o