₦airaland Forum

davillian:
From my experience it's just two reasons.
The parents and trust.
Once the parents starts to favour the rich children on issues and giving preferential treatments it brings in hate...
Once you trust your brothers or sisters to help handle task and they blow your founds it brings in hate....
But to me it's the parents some parent can send you on errands, that your younger ones should handle but because you not yet successful they fit send you to buy fuel, wash car , wash plates , turn on the gen while the younger ones seat and do nothing...
They won't even allow you contribute to issues that concern the family...
The truth is just make money...
If the success train starts from the first child to the last then they won't be issues but if it starts from the button aaaaah there is a huge problem

Rubyjade:

1Sharon:
Abeg shut up. Does the same thing happen with female siblings?

If a girl is too close to her siblings, wont the male try to control and separate them?

Rubyjade:
Oga! Marry, don't wait for anyone.

1Sharon:
This is why you need to put your foot down and stop allowing 3rd parties know about details in your marriage🥴

That african culture of controlling children's/younger siblings marraiges, doesn't sit right with me.

cassyrooy:
Keep it up. Sometimes, the enemies that causes us destruction are kit and kins.

God bless you boss.

Hamachi:
Hmn. I don't even know where to start. I believe siblings fall apart for a number of reasons. Envy is one of these reasons. We should all realize that though siblings come out of the birth canal of the same Mother, their destinies are different. The eldest child might not be the most successful child. In a family of 7 children, the 5th born might become richer than the other children due to reasons best known to God and hardwork. Sometimes, strife among siblings is caused by the Father or Mother who openly love one child than the others. The other children will notice this as they grow up and resentment and hate for the favored child sets in. Naturally, there will be competition among siblings but the behaviour of Parents also lead to disharmony among siblings later in life. So when the 4th born starts prospering than his senior brothers and sisters, strife sets in. I have also observed that wives and husbands of siblings also contribute to them falling apart. Women are naturally very competitive and they can wreck havoc on the love between two brothers. I know what I am saying because I have experienced this directly. The wife of an elder brother might not be too happy seeing her husband's junior brother doing well than him. So jealousy sets in and we all know what can happen.

In Europe and North America, there is little love between siblings because of the pressure to see who makes it big first. We have this absurd belief in Africa that the first born must do well than his junior siblings and that they must look up to him all the time. I have since thrown this belief into the dustbin and I've focused on my future with a view to doing well in life. Jay Jay Okocha's brother started playing football before him. Emmanuel Okocha played for the Super Eagles one or two times but Austin Okocha became a legend in the Nigerian National Team. It was even Emmanuel that took Austin Okocha to Germany. Jay Jay played for Clubs in Europe that his elder brother could only dream of. Yet they are still close to one another without any acrimony between them. Same obtains between Emmanuel and Celestine Babayaro. So I believe siblings should love one another and realize that our destinies are different because it is God that has the final answer as to what we will become in life. Cheers.

simplywhy:
When I was younger, considering how separated my parents and their siblings were, I used to think that I and my siblings can never be like that. But now?? Ours might be worse

larryking540:
just 2 things makes siblings fall apart
1. pride,why will I pick pride as the first, irrespective of who d first born is, there are somethings d first born can learn from the last born, same goes around, becus where d first born wouldn't step his or her legs, the last born go enter there and learn some valuable lessons,but the moment the last born day tell the first born some kin coded stuff or short cut,u will hear things like, who u b, am I ur mate, ,,,i believe what an old man can see while siting a young person can't see it, same with wat a young man can see while on top of the mountain even d old man too kw go see am,

u will not believe some last born are the first to step foot outside 9ja and after a while they bring their elder ones along, but some or most elder ones go start to act like say they first their younger one come the new location, and na there problem take day start,

2.is greed,or envy, one person day succeed the other own is slow, my people every person to e grace, I have met people who where very dull in secondary school but today day fly outside 9ja like backyard,

ur time go come just keep praying to God, and also pray for those succeeding

Hamachi:
Hmn. I don't even know where to start. I believe siblings fall apart for a number of reasons. Envy is one of these reasons. We should all realize that though siblings come out of the birth canal of the same Mother, their destinies are different. The eldest child might not be the most successful child. In a family of 7 children, the 5th born might become richer than the other children due to reasons best known to God and hardwork. Sometimes, strife among siblings is caused by the Father or Mother who openly love one child than the others. The other children will notice this as they grow up and resentment and hate for the favored child sets in. Naturally, there will be competition among siblings but the behaviour of Parents also lead to disharmony among siblings later in life. So when the 4th born starts prospering than his senior brothers and sisters, strife sets in. I have also observed that wives and husbands of siblings also contribute to them falling apart. Women are naturally very competitive and they can wreck havoc on the love between two brothers. I know what I am saying because I have experienced this directly. The wife of an elder brother might not be too happy seeing her husband's junior brother doing well than him. So jealousy sets in and we all know what can happen.

In Europe and North America, there is little love between siblings because of the pressure to see who makes it big first. We have this absurd belief in Africa that the first born must do well than his junior siblings and that they must look up to him all the time. I have since thrown this belief into the dustbin and I've focused on my future with a view to doing well in life. Jay Jay Okocha's brother started playing football before him. Emmanuel Okocha played for the Super Eagles one or two times but Austin Okocha became a legend in the Nigerian National Team. It was even Emmanuel that took Austin Okocha to Germany. Jay Jay played for Clubs in Europe that his elder brother could only dream of. Yet they are still close to one another without any acrimony between them. Same obtains between Emmanuel and Celestine Babayaro. So I believe siblings should love one another and realize that our destinies are different because it is God that has the final answer as to what we will become in life. Cheers.

softsoul22:
This is a vital topic to relate on, it sometimes start with the parents, favouring one to the other, this attitude degenerate sometimes and make the siblings disliking one another.

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oluseyiforjesus:
nice one
Go n start writing books you will make it from there sister. One love

Greenfaces:
This your article is a masterpiece. I agree with everything you said. What is the way forward for one who finds himself cut off by his siblings. Especially when he does not know any reasonable offence he committed.

achimendy:
You've said it all princess




One cold yoghurt for you.

Exodora:
Mine thinks he is my father even though my dad is very much alive.
He wants me to accept everything he says even when I know he is lying and nothing he says makes sense he still wants me to accept it just because he is my elder brother. I hate that part he reminds me of him telling me that his is older than I am so I should accept all he says just like that.

lordally:
Hi Annahh I had to mention u on a different thread.

I would like to send you a mail concern that customer service job you applied for, I would like to get more information on it. Please.

aswani:
An older sibling that is not ready to put in the sacrifices and effort required to justify that position but believes they should be honoured and respected for it simply by accident of birth is a problem that won't go away until that person changes their mindset.

This is not about giving money by the way, there is more to being an older sibling than that, much more.

Hamachi:
Start mending the bridge.
Start by calling once a week
Sending sms every festive period and news month

Princessdainty:
POVERTY.

Jeferious:
Na so woman thinking suppose be. Your gender no dey think in the interest of other people, or for the common good.

I'm fine like this. Carry your advice go front

vickydevoka:
Over closeness the bring enmity. Some people have forgiven spirit,why some doesn't.

Risingsunn:
that's the more reason I am minding my business. I no offend them, we are in different cities though. It's not like we are seeing each other everyday. I believe anyday we see, we go settle. But they must tell me my offense sha.

obinna58:
It’s not about the money, it’s about the future after you’ve made the money, he literally plays a real life game of chess, I’m not good at it due to my conscience and never a gamer, I have this instinct he can shoot me down if need be without a second thought.
I rather not bet it

Greenfaces:
you can't call people who do not even reply the message you send them. People who blocked you on WhatsApp and Facebook on the day you wished them happy birthday. Or the ones who didn't even care to congratulate you on your wedding and on the day your wife put to bed. Calling them once a week will be disturbance to them especially when they have reasons to feel their wealth and success is the motivation for you to come kneeling before them

Jeferious:
Guy, drink your garri and face your front. See eh, for this life, see finish no good. Even if poverty dey show you shege, still maintain your dignity as a Man

aswani:
An older sibling that is not ready to put in the sacrifices and effort required to justify that position but believes they should be honoured and respected for it simply by accident of birth is a problem that won't go away until that person changes their mindset.

This is not about giving money by the way, there is more to being an older sibling than that, much more.

Greenfaces:
you can't call people who do not even reply the message you send them. People who blocked you on WhatsApp and Facebook on the day you wished them happy birthday. Or the ones who didn't even care to congratulate you on your wedding and on the day your wife put to bed. Calling them once a week will be disturbance to them especially when they have reasons to feel their wealth and success is the motivation for you to come kneeling before them