₦airaland Forum

Brimstone77:
.....

I think I have a problem or not a problem per say,this is my story:

I have had some couples of ladies as friends but i do fall apart with almost all of them in a short distant time (never dated before) but have had some ladies as friends though not too close with some.

But one thing keep happening,we would stop talking to each other,I do feel bad sometimes after we stop taking but I'm the type that will never be the first to start talking to you or make peace with you no matter who you are when you're the first that started ignoring me, because I believe that once you stop talking to me then you don't need me,so trying to make peace will look like imposing or forcing myself on you..

Mind you i have this special respect for women can never talk down on then nor treat them bad and again I have never made any sexual advances towards any of them..

This issue started giving me concern because I think it will affect me tomorrow if I decide to date or marry..

Please guys what's wrong with me...am I normal?

Reminderz:
a man and a woman can never be friends.. what do you need female friends for? why female friends when you can have male friends or better still, stay on your lane?

what benefit does having female friends brought to you other than being used, manipulated and used as a medium to control boredom? don't you have any value than seeking female friends?

you don't need female friends, if what you want is sexual relationship or prospective partner, then go straight to the point and tell them your intention... you don't need female friends... you'll only end up getting used..

1Sharon:
Men love to accuse women of putting them in the friend zone. But some of you intentionally pretend to be friends with a woman knowing you wanted something deeper.

narite:
Your story Sounds like a rant to me. If ladies ignores you consistently , it a sure evidence that you are not exciting, unpredictable, mysterious, smart (not in a book way), lacks charisma etc. Work on yourself mate, you are the problem.

Reminderz:
a man and a woman can never be friends.. what do you need female friends for? why female friends when you can have male friends or better still, stay on your lane?

what benefit does having female friends brought to you other than being used, manipulated and used as a medium to control boredom? don't you have any value than seeking female friends?

you don't need female friends, if what you want is sexual relationship or prospective partner, then go straight to the point and tell them your intention... you don't need female friends... you'll only end up getting used..

Gadafii:
Bros na because you no Dey make sexual advances toward them na why dem dey abandon you like poor kid, I am not saying you are going to make sexual advances towards all of them all the time, but learn how to flirt with girls and create crazy imagination in their heads

You don’t actually have to say “I want to fukk you,” or “come fuxk me biiiccxhh”

But there are certain witty words and sarcasm that will help you achieve these

Ladies in general like men that thrill them, once you are too predictive they get bored of you, but always be steps ahead of them, don’t be desperate or needy if their attention.

While you on this, make sure you work on your self as well, be a man of value, a man of all seasons and weathers, don’t just use your diik to claim manhood

Lift weights,play soccer, hang out more, talk to strangers, seek knowledge, etc

ictplotter:
Story upon trash .... pls forget those ur plenty preaching.
The basic truth is if you want commitment and friendship with Nigeria's girls, go n make money and be successful financially. Even when are the most stupid n dumbest guy on earth Nigeria girls will alway find their way into you.
With money ur stupidity n waywardness as a guy can attract feelings n romance from Nigeria girls.

Gadafii:
every time go and make money,you think you need to tell that to anyone??

A fool and his money are soon
Parted, if you make the money and still lack the proper orientation towards Girls, you are still going to suffer in their hands, you think money is what it takes to handle or deal with them??

Dey jonze your self

ictplotter:
You local man, no need spending much time on this conversation.
The summary and bitter truth is with money, Nigeria girls are like TV remote.
If you want genuine love, emotional craziness and respect for beautiful and charming Nigeria girls.. go I make money n more money.

Gadafii:
money will only attract this type of women, it can’t keep them because there will always be someone that can spend more than you are spending on her, have you asked your self why girls don’t want to have anything to do with poor or struggling guy, but when they get rich and made men, they are still likely to go lay with a plumber,

If money does it all like you are saying, Jeff bezos wife and other rich men of this world for no divorce na

Brimstone77:
.....

I think I have a problem or not a problem per say,this is my story:

I have had some couples of ladies as friends but i do fall apart with almost all of them in a short distant time (never dated before) but have had some ladies as friends though not too close with some.

But one thing keep happening,we would stop talking to each other,I do feel bad sometimes after we stop taking but I'm the type that will never be the first to start talking to you or make peace with you no matter who you are when you're the first that started ignoring me, because I believe that once you stop talking to me then you don't need me,so trying to make peace will look like imposing or forcing myself on you..

Mind you i have this special respect for women can never talk down on then nor treat them bad and again I have never made any sexual advances towards any of them..

This issue started giving me concern because I think it will affect me tomorrow if I decide to date or marry..

Please guys what's wrong with me...am I normal?

Depriest2020:
When you choose to just be friends with ladies, if they like you & want more than just friends from you, and has giving you enough greenlight to take the friendship a step higher, if you don't, they would naturally be upset without telling u, they might stop talking to you as way of protest or be sad with you without telling you what the issues is all about. But some will start talking to you back after awhile.
That's just the simple truth, am speaking from experience.

Brimstone77:
.....

I think I have a problem or not a problem per say,this is my story:

I have had some couples of ladies as friends but i do fall apart with almost all of them in a short distant time (never dated before) but have had some ladies as friends though not too close with some.

But one thing keep happening,we would stop talking to each other,I do feel bad sometimes after we stop taking but I'm the type that will never be the first to start talking to you or make peace with you no matter who you are when you're the first that started ignoring me, because I believe that once you stop talking to me then you don't need me,so trying to make peace will look like imposing or forcing myself on you..

Mind you i have this special respect for women can never talk down on then nor treat them bad and again I have never made any sexual advances towards any of them..

This issue started giving me concern because I think it will affect me tomorrow if I decide to date or marry..

Please guys what's wrong with me...am I normal?

online4business:
Simple answer just make sure your gf or wife love you 70% no marry woman you love problem solve

coputa:
You need the to build strong positive emotions, devoid of pride and low self esteem.

Women are the best to make friends with, they have a lovely heart especially when they know you are genuine.

You can always talk to a friend even if he/ignores you, your friend is someone you can joke and play with, someone you are free to relate, someone you can tell anything.

Not someone you afraid of or fear to relate, infact you can fart in the his/presence.

narite:
Your story Sounds like a rant to me. If ladies ignores you consistently , it a sure evidence that you are not exciting, unpredictable, mysterious, smart (not in a book way), lacks charisma etc. Work on yourself mate, you are the problem.

UyaiIncomparabl:
They know this. But, they will always love to play pretence. Why not state your intentions from the beginning rather than hiding under the guise of being friends? As if men and women can even be platonic friends.

UyaiIncomparabl:
A man and a woman can never be platonic friends — NEVER. If he keeps you for friendship, it is either he doesn’t find you attractive, you are related, he’s castrated, a priest or just keeping you prepared ahead for doomsday. Do you disagree? YOUR PROBLEM.

What business do you – a man have with a woman and want to be close friends with her for? It’s never beneficial. Never symbiotic. One wants sex without the commitment. The other wants money, attention and boyfriend benefits without the commitment.

It is better to state your intentions no matter how lewd or noble it/they may seem. But, no, you men will not. You will rather choose the long path by trying to play the friendship card in the bid of wanting to seem genuine or intentional — another scam.

State your intentions lest you get friend zoned. Seek friendships with your gender or stay solo. You won’t die. Let women be friends with women and men with men. The only person I’m allowed to be friends with asides from the “GIRLS” is my man. Any other man is an impostor. Switch the table and do the same thing.

coputa:
How would you know that a girl love you.

UyaiIncomparabl:
A man and a woman can never be platonic friends — NEVER. If he keeps you for friendship, it is either he doesn’t find you attractive, you are related, he’s castrated, a priest or just keeping you prepared ahead for doomsday. Do you disagree? YOUR PROBLEM.

What business do you – a man have with a woman and want to be close friends with her for? It’s never beneficial. Never symbiotic. One wants sex without the commitment. The other wants money, attention and boyfriend benefits without the commitment.

It is better to state your intentions no matter how lewd or noble it/they may seem. But, no, you men will not. You will rather choose the long path by trying to play the friendship card in the bid of wanting to seem genuine or intentional — another scam.

State your intentions lest you get friend zoned. Seek friendships with your gender or stay solo. You won’t die. Let women be friends with women and men with men. The only person I’m allowed to be friends with asides from the “GIRLS” is my man. Any other man is an impostor. Switch the table and do the same thing.

CuriousStudent:
I tend to disagree with this sis, I think values and self control comes to play.

Nigerians are very opportunistics. Nothing like friendship for real. Even amongst members of the same sex, people see each other as a means to end. So it could be just a ripple effect of opportunism that plays in male and female friendship.

I have got great lifelong male friends, (some from this forum), and our friendship is strictly platonic and neither of us has feelings for each other or have attempted exploiting each other in any way.

But finding members of the opposite sex that has never dreamt of enjoying bf/gf privilege from you is hard sha

Brimstone77:
...

The issue is that I'm scared of being too attached to people..

I'm too emotional and will feel hurt if eventually the person leave..

I have always maintain a kind of distance when relating with people (both gender) so I don't miss them when they leave tomorrow..


I don't think I'm proud or have low self esteem...

Edipet:
I will say you are almost like me here, infact it's like am the one writing this. At a point I thought I have problem., Chai.

Nazgul:
If the average Nigerian girl isn't directly benefiting things like money, connections, favours...etc. from you, she'll naturally loose interest in whatever kind of friendship you claim to have with her.

It's almost impossible to have a casual female friend in Nigeria today. Their friendship isn't free, it comes with a price tag. Sooner or later, she must need a favour.

Nazgul:
If the average Nigerian girl isn't directly benefiting things like money, connections, favours...etc. from you, she'll naturally loose interest in whatever kind of friendship you claim to have with her.

It's almost impossible to have a casual female friend in Nigeria today. Their friendship isn't free, it comes with a price tag. Sooner or later, she must need a favour.

Brimstone77:
.....

I think I have a problem or not a problem per say,this is my story:

I have had some couples of ladies as friends but i do fall apart with almost all of them in a short distant time (never dated before) but have had some ladies as friends though not too close with some.

But one thing keep happening,we would stop talking to each other,I do feel bad sometimes after we stop taking but I'm the type that will never be the first to start talking to you or make peace with you no matter who you are when you're the first that started ignoring me, because I believe that once you stop talking to me then you don't need me,so trying to make peace will look like imposing or forcing myself on you..

Mind you i have this special respect for women can never talk down on then nor treat them bad and again I have never made any sexual advances towards any of them..

This issue started giving me concern because I think it will affect me tomorrow if I decide to date or marry..

Please guys what's wrong with me...am I normal?

Nazgul:
If the average Nigerian girl isn't directly benefiting things like money, connections, favours...etc. from you, she'll naturally loose interest in whatever kind of friendship you claim to have with her.

It's almost impossible to have a casual female friend in Nigeria today. Their friendship isn't free, it comes with a price tag. Sooner or later, she must need a favour.

UyaiIncomparabl:
A man and a woman can never be platonic friends — NEVER. If he keeps you for friendship, it is either he doesn’t find you attractive, you are related, he’s castrated, a priest or just keeping you prepared ahead for doomsday. Do you disagree? YOUR PROBLEM.

What business do you – a man have with a woman and want to be close friends with her for? It’s never beneficial. Never symbiotic. One wants sex without the commitment. The other wants money, attention and boyfriend benefits without the commitment.

It is better to state your intentions no matter how lewd or noble it/they may seem. But, no, you men will not. You will rather choose the long path by trying to play the friendship card in the bid of wanting to seem genuine or intentional — another scam.

State your intentions lest you get friend zoned. Seek friendships with your gender or stay solo. You won’t die. Let women be friends with women and men with men. The only person I’m allowed to be friends with asides from the “GIRLS” is my man. Any other man is an impostor. Switch the table and do the same thing.

pansophist:
Hate speech. Toxic femininity.

If you don't get it, forget about it