I get this alot,and thankfully lately it has reduced.
Days ago I was forced to step up to him telling him sternly it has to stop and I would no longer tolerate his nonsense acts.

Man got the message and has started avoiding me.

I later got to know that I wasn't even the only person he has bn harassing.

correctguy101:


Even me wey be man no dey like make somebody wey I no get anything with touch me...

All my awareness go wake once I perceive say someone touch me and I'll immediately be ready to defend myself ( not in a jumpy way o, but the look in my eyes most times even scare my women). Some thiefs don spoil my psyche, just one touch and many things go miss ....smh

Just let the baba know you know what he wants and you're not giving. Your keeping quiet is making our manager have hope. And if he continues after the warning, let him know you can take legal action if he doesn't stop his itchy fingers.

And all those werey recommending resignation, na wa for una o.

IconicR:
The sad thing is that this your randy bIoss may be here to condemn such act with every anger in him and even profer the best solution and steps to take, that's the hypocritical world we live in.


All of them are saint and very upright online yet we keep seeing underage girls getting pregnant everyday and all sorts of sexual harassment everywhere, maybe it's ghosts that are doing all these rubbish

correctguy101:


Hahahaha

Witty you be yeye person o...

You suspecting this ancestor could be the itchy finger boss?

Me no dey do office work o...

Yeye man that you are

Wittyness

sunsweet33:
My office hired a new manager and as I was standing by the side doing something he came up behind me put his hand on my lower back/waist and asked “how are you doing”. At that moment all my usual fire went out of the window and I just froze up. Actually there were 3 other senior staff around who must have seen it and warned him because thereafter, he only tapped my shoulder or shoulder blades (which I dont have any problem with).

Now a couple of days ago I had my hands full again doing something and this man passed behind me, held both sides of my waist very briefly and brushed against my back.

the whole thing was over in less than 5 seconds and I didn’t even see the person until I turned my head to see him watching me from the other side of the office.

bearing in mind this is a senior boss, I don’t feel I can shout or confront as normal so I have just been giving some stern/cold attitudes and stepping out of the way in a more exaggerated way whenever he passes by me. And he has started reciprocating the awkwardness which made it easier for me.

But how realistic is this? In another thread somebody wrote that his brother tried to get his female colleagues fired for rejecting his advances and I fear something similar may happen to me.

Its so irritating. This guy says he has a girlfriend so why not go home and touch her? WTF.

You need to activate your inner Kolo.

Next time he touches you inappropriately you should be ready to slap him severely so as to take him back to his default settings.

Or you can publicly shame him and shout at him.

As the wise Portable once said, "there is power in the tongue. Speak up."

ShoeWorld1:
From what I read up there, you're the one seducing your Co-workers.
Must you always bend your waist like a mason turning cement whenever the manager is approaching
And I know you always put on skirts and gowns that are above the knee and tight to show your shapes.


Anyways to answer your question irrespective of your seduction.

You'll start behaving abnormally whenever you're with sex predators. Start doing something disgusting like picking your nose and tasting it
You can also pollute when alone with him and believe me, that perfect picture he has about fvcking your cunt hard will disappear with immediate alacrity.
You can also feel free to tell him that you want to go and poo

I have never heard that someone got fired for doing any of the above things.
And there are more I would like to add but I don't want to write too much.

some men are dirty. Trust me. Very dirty.

Office romance works for some and doesn’t work for some. Hard truth

sunsweet33:


Resign? At my previous place, the manager did this same thing to me and another lady and the worst part was that he still continued even as his wife was heavily pregnant. He would miss morning session to attend his wife’s antenatals then come and disturb us…does it make sense?

I eventually lost my temper and exploded over another issue, he took offence and submitted my name for transfer with so much embarrassment which I rejected and left the job, only to enter this new snake pit again…make una help me o..where am I resigning and running to again

Not an easy one especially in Nigeria. Nothing much to offer but prayers that the Lord give you wisdom to navigate things.

Remain professional in dealing with him and making it clear that you are there to do your job excellently and nothing else.

If there is ever anyone to talk to in your office please explore it. Anonymous letters or concerns etc may work as well.

God help you

Greenfaces:
some men are dirty. Trust me. Very dirty.

Even if someone is dirty, he will no longer have the urge of fvcking someone doing disgusting things.

This shit happens in almost every office. it takes a woman with a strong will to decline such advances and harrassment .even in my office I know of 2ladies my manager is digging.

That's lack of self control.
He is a weak man. Simp

sunsweet33:
My office hired a new manager and as I was standing by the side doing something he came up behind me put his hand on my lower back/waist and asked “how are you doing”. At that moment all my usual fire went out of the window and I just froze up. Actually there were 3 other senior staff around who must have seen it and warned him because thereafter, he only tapped my shoulder or shoulder blades (which I dont have any problem with).

Now a couple of days ago I had my hands full again doing something and this man passed behind me, held both sides of my waist very briefly and brushed against my back.

the whole thing was over in less than 5 seconds and I didn’t even see the person until I turned my head to see him watching me from the other side of the office.

bearing in mind this is a senior boss, I don’t feel I can shout or confront as normal so I have just been giving some stern/cold attitudes and stepping out of the way in a more exaggerated way whenever he passes by me. And he has started reciprocating the awkwardness which made it easier for me.

But how realistic is this? In another thread somebody wrote that his brother tried to get his female colleagues fired for rejecting his advances and I fear something similar may happen to me.

Its so irritating. This guy says he has a girlfriend so why not go home and touch her? WTF.

I like this type of a person to a child that was sent an errand to buy cooked egg, he started licking the back of the egg just to have a taste of it.


The man is a he-goat, wife of such person should be careful her daughter around him.

......and for OP, I STRONGLY ADVICE YOU NOT TO GIVE HIM FACE AGAIN, any slightest chance you will end up in his bed.

You these ladies facing sexual harassment need to be bold and tell them off that you will not allow that nonsense. Let the person know that you are not going anywhere, and that if anyone is going, he should be the one to go. Send fears to his spine, let him know you are not afraid and you are not going anywhere.

CHIOMAEZEH:
Only one option...

Quit the job.

sunsweet33:


Resign? At my previous place, the manager did this same thing to me and another lady and the worst part was that he still continued even as his wife was heavily pregnant. He would miss morning session to attend his wife’s antenatals then come and disturb us…does it make sense?

I eventually lost my temper and exploded over another issue, he took offence and submitted my name for transfer with so much embarrassment which I rejected and left the job, only to enter this new snake pit again…make una help me o..where am I resigning and running to again

Meanwhile, I will also advise you to be dressing appropriate, because many of u ladies would come out to say how men harassing u, but u won't say how u too harassing them with ur revealing dresses.


Meanwhile, after you have convinced that u dress well, you should also make sure u re not playing with men unnecessarily.

And most importantly, u should avoid asking for favor and gift from men

- Men and women cannot work together. Separate them or keep having these.

- Even female bosses sometimes will frustrate the life of a young man she wants to be penetrated by hahaha.

- 9 times out of 10, women in workplaces are FREE FOR ALL BOSSES - willingly or not.

- Maybe you should start covering your whole body like the Muslims hehe. It's hard to get harassed in full hijab, no ? Don't dress like a part time runs girl to work.

Caaz:
I get this alot,and thankfully lately it has reduced.
Days ago I was forced to step up to him telling him sternly it has to stop and I would no longer tolerate his nonsense acts.

Man got the message and has started avoiding me.

I later got to know that I wasn't even the only person he has bn harassing.

These are lowly men, they were never taught attraction can't be forced.

sunsweet33:
My office hired a new manager and as I was standing by the side doing something he came up behind me put his hand on my lower back/waist and asked “how are you doing”. At that moment all my usual fire went out of the window and I just froze up. Actually there were 3 other senior staff around who must have seen it and warned him because thereafter, he only tapped my shoulder or shoulder blades (which I dont have any problem with).

Now a couple of days ago I had my hands full again doing something and this man passed behind me, held both sides of my waist very briefly and brushed against my back.

the whole thing was over in less than 5 seconds and I didn’t even see the person until I turned my head to see him watching me from the other side of the office.

bearing in mind this is a senior boss, I don’t feel I can shout or confront as normal so I have just been giving some stern/cold attitudes and stepping out of the way in a more exaggerated way whenever he passes by me. And he has started reciprocating the awkwardness which made it easier for me.

But how realistic is this? In another thread somebody wrote that his brother tried to get his female colleagues fired for rejecting his advances and I fear something similar may happen to me.

Its so irritating. This guy says he has a girlfriend so why not go home and touch her? WTF.

Get your evidence against him and warn him sternly never to try such again. If he persist report him or take legal action.

sunsweet33:


Resign? At my previous place, the manager did this same thing to me and another lady and the worst part was that he still continued even as his wife was heavily pregnant. He would miss morning session to attend his wife’s antenatals then come and disturb us…does it make sense?

I eventually lost my temper and exploded over another issue, he took offence and submitted my name for transfer with so much embarrassment which I rejected and left the job, only to enter this new snake pit again…make una help me o..where am I resigning and running to again

E be like say you dey enter eyes wella..

Make I see your picture na. In private

correctguy101:


Even me wey be man no dey like make somebody wey I no get anything with touch me...

All my awareness go wake once I perceive say someone touch me and I'll immediately be ready to defend myself ( not in a jumpy way o, but the look in my eyes most times even scare my women). Some thiefs don spoil my psyche, just one touch and many things go miss ....smh

Just let the baba know you know what he wants and you're not giving. Your keeping quiet is making our manager have hope. And if he continues after the warning, let him know you can take legal action if he doesn't stop his itchy fingers.

And all those werey recommending resignation, na wa for una o.

what legal action. Na naija we de o, no be Yankee

sunsweet33:
My office hired a new manager and as I was standing by the side doing something he came up behind me put his hand on my lower back/waist and asked “how are you doing”. At that moment all my usual fire went out of the window and I just froze up. Actually there were 3 other senior staff around who must have seen it and warned him because thereafter, he only tapped my shoulder or shoulder blades (which I dont have any problem with).

Now a couple of days ago I had my hands full again doing something and this man passed behind me, held both sides of my waist very briefly and brushed against my back.

the whole thing was over in less than 5 seconds and I didn’t even see the person until I turned my head to see him watching me from the other side of the office.

bearing in mind this is a senior boss, I don’t feel I can shout or confront as normal so I have just been giving some stern/cold attitudes and stepping out of the way in a more exaggerated way whenever he passes by me. And he has started reciprocating the awkwardness which made it easier for me.

But how realistic is this? In another thread somebody wrote that his brother tried to get his female colleagues fired for rejecting his advances and I fear something similar may happen to me.

Its so irritating. This guy says he has a girlfriend so why not go home and touch her? WTF.

leave the workplace cos no job in Nigeria to fight for your right o

sunsweet33:

he held both sides of my waist very briefly and brushed against my back.

the whole thing was over in less than 5 seconds and I didn’t even see the person until I turned my head to see him watching me from the other side of the office.

You should have screamed and yelled and raised hell as soon as he did that. This would have further strengtened your case as regards the first happening which was witnessed by others. BUT YOU DID NOT. Instead you are there giving him cold attitude like he gives a shit. How does that help? If it helped then you wouldn't be here on NL with this story. You are part of the problem.

He would have been more cautious and will never forget the embarassment. What is the worst that woulf have happened? A sack or you quit with your head held high. But here you are. Now it is your word against his and he has the upper hand. He has played the sexual predator mind games with you and he has won. He will try it on others too.

Report this to the HR and put him in copy

sunsweet33:
My office hired a new manager and as I was standing by the side doing something he came up behind me put his hand on my lower back/waist and asked “how are you doing”. At that moment all my usual fire went out of the window and I just froze up. Actually there were 3 other senior staff around who must have seen it and warned him because thereafter, he only tapped my shoulder or shoulder blades (which I dont have any problem with).

Now a couple of days ago I had my hands full again doing something and this man passed behind me, held both sides of my waist very briefly and brushed against my back.

the whole thing was over in less than 5 seconds and I didn’t even see the person until I turned my head to see him watching me from the other side of the office.

bearing in mind this is a senior boss, I don’t feel I can shout or confront as normal so I have just been giving some stern/cold attitudes and stepping out of the way in a more exaggerated way whenever he passes by me. And he has started reciprocating the awkwardness which made it easier for me.

But how realistic is this? In another thread somebody wrote that his brother tried to get his female colleagues fired for rejecting his advances and I fear something similar may happen to me.

Its so irritating. This guy says he has a girlfriend so why not go home and touch her? WTF.

I tell them I'm in a relationship, back off.

Omg!!! That is so wrong. And for him to do it again after being warned? Wow!! In a saner climate he would've been fired on the spot right after that first instance!! It seems you yourself kept quiet. You should've shouted and caused a scene that he wouldn't have had the audacity to try it again that second time. If he tries it again the third time, cause a scene and let everyone know what he keeps doing, and that you will not tolerate it any longer. Shout and cause a scene right there

sunsweet33:
My office hired a new manager and as I was standing by the side doing something he came up behind me put his hand on my lower back/waist and asked “how are you doing”. At that moment all my usual fire went out of the window and I just froze up. Actually there were 3 other senior staff around who must have seen it and warned him because thereafter, he only tapped my shoulder or shoulder blades (which I dont have any problem with).

Now a couple of days ago I had my hands full again doing something and this man passed behind me, held both sides of my waist very briefly and brushed against my back.

the whole thing was over in less than 5 seconds and I didn’t even see the person until I turned my head to see him watching me from the other side of the office.

bearing in mind this is a senior boss, I don’t feel I can shout or confront as normal so I have just been giving some stern/cold attitudes and stepping out of the way in a more exaggerated way whenever he passes by me. And he has started reciprocating the awkwardness which made it easier for me.

But how realistic is this? In another thread somebody wrote that his brother tried to get his female colleagues fired for rejecting his advances and I fear something similar may happen to me.

Its so irritating. This guy says he has a girlfriend so why not go home and touch her? WTF.

Before you think it's only women who suffer sexual harassment at work, lemme add my own.

1. During an intense job at the office (on my first job) I commented that I was tired and joked that I needed a nap. An older lady coworker nearby pressed her boobs and told me, "see pillow here, if you want to sleep".

2. Another one: I was working at my desk, and a lady coworker leaned over as if to talk to me, with her blouse not fully buttoned. I simply remarked to her that "they" are very nice, but could she please button up, because what she's doing is sexual harassment.

3. A friend was looking for a tech support job many years ago. A lady (maybe a Senior Manager) asked him point blank if he was ready to make herself and other (older, probably married, mostly Northerners) ladies "happy" if they needed him to. The guy said he didn't understand (of course he did!). Well, he didn't hear from them again.

In your case, seek out a senior female colleague and tell her your worries. I think that may help. If the guy now starts acting badly towards you, it proves your suspicions to the senior lady.

As for us guys........ we're on our own. Any guy facing such will sooner or later kiss that job goodbye.

Work on your dress. The size of your back might be the reason for his action. Stop dressing seductively to the office and stop the flashy makeup and all these would be gone.

wittywriter:







Wittyness

Hahahaha

Witty you be yeye person o...

You suspecting this ancestor could be the itchy finger boss?

Me no dey do office work o...

Yeye man that you are

oladele00:
Work on your dress. The size of your back might be the reason for his action. Stop dressing seductively to the office and stop the flashy makeup and all these would be gone.

That is not true.

Tell me you don't know that a lot of men are billy goats. They must not see a girl, wahala don start.

Cromagnon:
what legal action. Na naija we de o, no be Yankee

You dey correct. Our law enforcers over here always do the opposite of what they're supposed to do. No wonder many are recommending she leaves the place if she no like am... smh

sunsweet33:


Resign? At my previous place, the manager did this same thing to me and another lady and the worst part was that he still continued even as his wife was heavily pregnant. He would miss morning session to attend his wife’s antenatals then come and disturb us…does it make sense?

I eventually lost my temper and exploded over another issue, he took offence and submitted my name for transfer with so much embarrassment which I rejected and left the job, only to enter this new snake pit again…make una help me o..where am I resigning and running to again

It's almost everywhere. Ok if you resign go another place go meet another one nko? I will say you wait when you are one on one with him, you tell him you are not comfortable with how he touches you and if he doesn't stop, you will take legal actions against him, try as much as possible to have this very conversation on record.

One recently happened in a company located at Ajose Adogun Victoria Island. I have a friend who works there and told me how almost all the senior staffs indulge in these act, starting with the Director down to the the junior managers.
It was a like a competition where each of the managers has someone they were sleeping with. It was no longer something done in secret which was really disgusting.

Just last month the female staffs all reported one of the managers who received a memo from the chairman. He was demoted and transferred to another lesser branch with immediate effect.

Now the remaining managers are being strict to all the female staffs. They no longer treat them in a friendly manner because of what happened. Always looking for mistakes so that they can be sanctioned.

She is planning on resigning as soon as she collects her pay.

iamtardey:
Sexual harassment? Just resign cos it never stops…or. Stand up to him let him know your kind, I’m afraid you will have to kip doing that till further notice tho cos it never stops. And yes it’s most likely go that way one of you or him has to be made scapegoat…. The odds are against you but… your ball

Please do not stand up to him o
Let your body language express your displeasure. When he touches you , turn around smile and greet him calling his name and boldly look into his name. Keep your voice low and calm while doing this.
2 things will happen :
He will ask you out after a while then you can give your answer or the touching will cease.