₦airaland Forum

...what kind of talk is this for crying out loud..? i and my girl decided to make it official by tieing the knot especially since sh is about 3 months pregnant..

At last i journeyed to her home town and her family house just last week oo.. the parents received me well, and in the goings her dad refused to accept my dowry payment insisting i must wait for 6 more months to marry her. according to him, it is forbidden to marry a pregnant lady in their tribe.. which kain talk b that, he said giving her out now means giving two persons to me at once , that i must wait for safe drlivery nd they take the child since sh is not married yet before i can marry only his daughter...i am suspecting its because they have only one male child in their family so they want to try luck.. moreover, we dont even know the child sex yet..

Me and sh wanted to make this official so that the coming child will b legitimate and moroever what is one even waiting for..?

aveg which kain confusion be this.. anyone heard of this kind of thing before..?

Every tribe have their customs and traditions. Just respect it

MidasTouch15:
Every tribe have their customs and traditions. Just respect it

Yes no rush. So long as the marriage go still happen. So take your time and live as a couple first. No hurries

bigpicture001:
...what kind of talk is this for crying out loud..? i and my girl decided to make it official by tieing the knot especially since sh is about 3 months pregnant..

At last i journeyed to her home town and her family house just last week oo.. the parents received me well, and in the goings her dad refused to accept my dowry payment insisting i must wait for 6 more months to marry her. according to him, it is forbidden to marry a pregnant lady in their tribe.. which kain talk b that, he said giving her out now means giving two persons to me at once , that i must wait for safe drlivery nd they take the child since sh is not married yet before i can marry only his daughter...i am suspecting its because they have only one male child in their family so they want to try luck.. moreover, we dont even know the child sex yet..

Me and sh wanted to make this official so that the coming child will b legitimate and moroever what is one even waiting for..?

aveg which kain confusion be this.. anyone heard of this kind of thing before..?

It is the tradition of most tribes in NIGERIA especially the igbo tribe bro... You CANNOT pay the bride price of a pregnant woman, but you can go ahead with the white and traditional marriage if you're prepared to marry her, with that nobody will take your child, then bride price collection will be fixed another time after your woman must have put to birth⚠️

Nobody wants to collect your child oga, It's a common tradition in most places, you can make your enquiry too if you doubt it.

No dey reason m go far abeg

bigpicture001:
...what kind of talk is this for crying out loud..? i and my girl decided to make it official by tieing the knot especially since sh is about 3 months pregnant..

At last i journeyed to her home town and her family house just last week oo.. the parents received me well, and in the goings her dad refused to accept my dowry payment insisting i must wait for 6 more months to marry her. according to him, it is forbidden to marry a pregnant lady in their tribe.. which kain talk b that, he said giving her out now means giving two persons to me at once , that i must wait for safe drlivery nd they take the child since sh is not married yet before i can marry only his daughter...i am suspecting its because they have only one male child in their family so they want to try luck.. moreover, we dont even know the child sex yet..

Me and sh wanted to make this official so that the coming child will b legitimate and moroever what is one even waiting for..?

aveg which kain confusion be this.. anyone heard of this kind of thing before..?

I suspect your in-laws are igbos.... It is the tradition in some places in the east.

Solution: Get your fianceè to introduce you to her uncles who can mediate in the matter. You'll just have to pay some fines

tochez24:
It is the tradition of most tribes in NIGERIA especially the igbo tribe bro... You CANNOT pay the bride price of a pregnant woman, but you can go ahead with the white and traditional marriage if you're prepared to marry her, with that nobody will take your child, then bride price collection will be fixed another time after your woman must have put to birth⚠️

Nobody wants to collect your child oga, It's a common tradition in most places, you can make your enquiry too if you doubt it.

No dey reason m go far abeg

Traditional marriage without the Bride Price is like a naming ceremony

Are you getting married to her because of the pregnancy.

If really you love her and want to marry her then wait.
You can sort for your child immediately after the marriage/delivery
That was it would be very easy because your woman would be the one to breastfeed and care for the child not her parents.

Am sure the girl is Igbo. Its a normal tradition. They didnt explain it to you properly.
You cannot pay for dowry when the woman is pregnant, you cannot also return the dowry when a woman is pregnant. That is the tradition.

I remember a case that happened in my family that made me understand this tradition.

My cousin's husband was fooling around and beating her as she was pregnant. They both decided to end the marriage.
On the day the family officially came to return the dowry, an elder from the husband's side asked both of them to air their grievances.

The guy didnt say much. My sister explained that the man has been jobless since they married. She first bought a bike for the man to start okada business, the man was not bringing any returns home till the bike spoilt.

She also bought keke for the man without the man bringing a dime, yet the man does not contribute anything to the house. She single handedly built their house in the village and sunk borehole which is very expensive.
She alone pays for the children's school fees. She opted for seperation when she heard the guy rented house for another girl.

The elder that asked the question was so furious at the guy as he did not explain properly to them what happened.

But the elder in his wisdom did not want the marriage to break as he saw my cousin as a great asset to the family. He threw this law up. My cousin was pregnant then. The man called my family's attention to the fact that "their" wife was pregnant and the dowry cannot be returned till their child is born.

The elders in my family were all infuriated yet they were weak as they are bound by the customs and tradition. The elder hurriedly left with the husband and their faimily members to discountinue that process.

Very early the next day around 4:30 AM, I heard a knock on our gate, it was the elder and husband. The elder knelt down and begged my father to please intervene in the situation and not let them to seperate. That their son has been so foolish. They went home that day and the entire family descended on the guy. Telling him he is so lucky to have such a wife.

After a long time pleading, my dad promised to intervene which he did. Till today they are still happily married. The guy cried like a baby when my father died.

That is the tradition

Culture wey dey forbid pregnant lady from marrying but dey allow her to knack before marriage.....

So dem dey allow pre season match to go on but prohibit any post season match abi

I like your girlfriend papa

You didn’t consult the man before you give her bele, she was her daughter and still her daughter before she’s your potential wife.

Follow their custom and marry her according to it if you don’t want to marry her the papa will take yiur child, if you marry the mama , by natural law tiu are the father and no man can take that child away from you because of custom and traditions, the child Carrie’s your dna, and in the long run the child will learn to accept you as the father not his grandpapa

Pray nothing happens to the lady during child birth. I hope the woman is not from Akwaibom.

Tallesty1:
Traditional marriage without the Bride Price is like a naming ceremony

Dey play 🙄... Infact my inlaw did the same thing, after doing his traditional marriage with my sister, he waited for many months until my sister put to birth before he came back alone to bring the bride price⚠️

Once you fulfill wetin dey list e don finish my brother... You can come along with the bride price any time any day (no ceremony needed again)

For me, this is not an issue so far you have an understanding with your in laws... Nah una dey pressure una selves♂️

tochez24:
Dey play 🙄... Infact my inlaw did the same thing, after doing his traditional marriage with my sister, he waited for many months until my sister put to birth before he came back alone to bring the bride price⚠️

Once you fulfill wetin dey list e don finish my brother... You can come along with the bride price any time any day (no ceremony needed again)

For me, this is not an issue so far you have an understanding with your in laws... Nah una dey pressure una selves♂️

In Igbo land?

bigpicture001:
...what kind of talk is this for crying out loud..? i and my girl decided to make it official by tieing the knot especially since sh is about 3 months pregnant..

At last i journeyed to her home town and her family house just last week oo.. the parents received me well, and in the goings her dad refused to accept my dowry payment insisting i must wait for 6 more months to marry her. according to him, it is forbidden to marry a pregnant lady in their tribe.. which kain talk b that, he said giving her out now means giving two persons to me at once , that i must wait for safe drlivery nd they take the child since sh is not married yet before i can marry only his daughter...i am suspecting its because they have only one male child in their family so they want to try luck.. moreover, we dont even know the child sex yet..

Me and sh wanted to make this official so that the coming child will b legitimate and moroever what is one even waiting for..?

aveg which kain confusion be this.. anyone heard of this kind of thing before..?

Bro, u are confused and saying thrash, do u think is all parents that are irresponsible?

Why did u not marry her before getting her pregnant?
Did u know that it is a big disrespect to the father.

Modernisation dey make una think like fools.

I have a Nigga that is currently in confusion na, He impregnated a Baby mama of 4, The Lady died giving birth, luckily, the child is a live.
The family gave this Nigga, a bill of almost 2million.
See, i don't blame d family, i just told him to appeal to the family to reduce and consider him.

The day we shifted from Sanity our ancestors created in our societies to follow westernisation and erase common sense, started our doom!.

You are lucky the man didn't arrest you.

ABEG MAKE UNA SHIFT WITH UNA MUMU RANTS.