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How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? - Family (2) - Nairaland

Nairaland ForumNairaland GeneralFamilyHow Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? (2590 Views)

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Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by kingthreat(m): 2:16pm On Jan 24, 2025
Tell your sister to separate ASAP. If she cannot, help her change apartment. No need for calling soldiers, those guys no well. Their violence no be here.
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by eniolorunfe: 2:33pm On Jan 24, 2025
It may not be easy, but do all you can to get your sister out of that situation/house. Since you’re aware, if anything happens to her I doubt if you’ll forgive yourself.
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by MarketDispatch: 2:34pm On Jan 24, 2025
Preston114:
Recently one of my sisters his.
Have you called and spoken to your Sister's husband?
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by Mumben(f): 2:49pm On Jan 24, 2025
Marriages of nowadays, just recently a man burnt his wife at abagana. Pls do everything in your power to save your sister abeg. Her life matters. I don't think I can endure that kind of abuse oh, I for don pack my children run go my papa house.
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by ChiefOkporghe: 3:04pm On Jan 24, 2025
Fiscus105:
You dnt know the root cause of their fighting, yet you want to file a report.


How did it even sound to you comming to report your sister's husband to public without having a single clue of root and immediately cause of their marital differences.

The other sisters that are used to eavesdrop whenever couples are fighting, why can't they use the same tactics to know the root causes?
If we end up having another Ekwueme issue, will there be any “root cause" that will justify her murder in court?

If there is any “root cause" that can make a man want to strangle his wife, why can't he divorce her so both of them can go their separate ways?
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by Kobojunkie: 3:05pm On Jan 24, 2025
Preston114:
➜Early this morning, I got another call from my other sister that the husband is assaulting her again and this time it was more serious. She shared a video evidence with me and it sincerely broke my heart. However, I asked her to delete the video so it does not erroneously get to the public as she was naked in the video.
➜It's important to mention that they have been married for more than 10 years. I sincerely don't know the root cause of their issue. However, I find it hard to understand how fellow men get to this point of battering their wives without any sense of remorse.
I'm not in Nigeria so I'm constrained on the actions I can take from my current location. I was making an arrangement with a friend to help me deploy some soldiers do their house but I had to pend it as I was informed that he has left the house and when he does that he probably stays out for a week before coming back home. I guess this is part of the issues they are having.
My parents are quite old hence, I would like to coordinate necessary actions on this issue myself. Although my sister is appealing that we overlook the matter as her concern is to keep her marriage. She's not even considering her safety.
Can I file a report with human rights activist on behalf of my sister? If yes I would appreciate advice on how to do this.
1. You deleted evidence of the assault against your sister and are here to ask us what abeg? This is evidence you should have at least used to maybe convince your punching bag of a sister of how pathetic her married life really is but you deleted it. sad

2. If you file a report, what evidence do you intend to provide the authorities as proof of your claim? Since your sister is OK with her being used as a punching bag, doesn't that then mean that what you need is evidence of the assault as a third-party? lipsrsealed lipsrsealed
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by Kobojunkie: 3:09pm On Jan 24, 2025
Preston114:
➜This guy was literally out of work for two years and during this period all his friends deserted him. My family had all hands on deck to provide financial support for them during those trying times. To see how he became a monster after getting back on his feet hits me by surprise
Well, you all enabled him to become a monster though. But the main problem here is that your sister continues to enable him by serving as his punching bag at this point. And you deleted evidence that could have at least shown her how pathetic the situation has become. 🙄
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by Kobojunkie:
Preston114:
➜I like to be logical. Hence, I admit that anything is possible. To my best of knowledge, she's always been decent as she was a virgin when she got married. Graduated as the best in her department but succumbed to her husband's manipulations that kept her from pursuing a career. She's now in a state where she's been conditioned to depend on her husband and as such tolerate whatever he does
So, you actually think that there could exist a plausible reason for why her husband would choke your own sister? Do you really believe there could exist a rational reason for why your naked sister was assaulted by her husband in the video that you deleted? And you don't live in Nigeria, you said? sad
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by Kobojunkie: 3:13pm On Jan 24, 2025
Preston114:
➜They've got 4 kids. Will try and have a chat with her. She's hardly forthcoming with engagements.
4 children witnessing their mother being assaulted every day by her husband? I guess your sister is trying to join the ranks of Osinachi who has been food for worms for a couple of years now. undecided

I bet you Osinachi's kids are not only scarred by the fact that they did nothing as they watched their father assault and eventually kill their mother but also carrying the guilt of it around with them wherever they are today. Kids who watch such things don't always turn out well. Wonder, what kind of adulthood they will have. huh
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by ChiefOkporghe: 3:15pm On Jan 24, 2025
Preston114:
Recently one of my sisters went to visit our elder sister and found out that her husband has been assaulting her. According to my sister who went visiting, she said the first time she noticed this, she perceived some struggles in the apartment and decided to check what exactly was happening only to find my elder sister pinned to the wall by her husband and held tightly on her neck that she was grasping for breath.

When I was informed about this, it felt so disheartening. I called my sister in question and enquired what was happening as none of us ever knew that she was going through such in her marriage. She swept the topic under the rug with an excuse that it had never happened before and it was just a misunderstanding. I felt something off but I thought we should let it slide since my sister does not seem interested in us taking actions.

Early this morning, I got another call from my other sister that the husband is assaulting her again and this time it was more serious. She shared a video evidence with me and it sincerely broke my heart. However, I asked her to delete the video so it does not erroneously get to the public as she was naked in the video.

It's important to mention that they have been married for more than 10 years. I sincerely don't know the root cause of their issue. However, I find it hard to understand how fellow men get to this point of battering their wives without any sense of remorse.

I'm not in Nigeria so I'm constrained on the actions I can take from my current location. I was making an arrangement with a friend to help me deploy some soldiers do their house but I had to pend it as I was informed that he has left the house and when he does that he probably stays out for a week before coming back home. I guess this is part of the issues they are having.

My parents are quite old hence, I would like to coordinate necessary actions on this issue myself. Although my sister is appealing that we overlook the matter as her concern is to keep her marriage. She's not even considering her safety.

Can I file a report with human rights activist on behalf of my sister? If yes I would appreciate advice on how to do this.
If that man ends up murdering your sister, you all will have to deal with the emotional, financial and parenting burdens.

Plus the guilt that you guys could have done something earlier.

Your sister is struggling with Stockholm syndrome as such is not in the proper state of mind to leave.
No matter what the root cause may be, it doesn't justify this manner of assault to the extent of pinning her to the wall to strangulate her.

He is testing how far he can go and the reactions...if none of you do anything, he will do more and end up killing her.

After all, it wasn't Osinachi's husband's intention to kill his wife according to him.
But he did.

Now, if your sister should be murdered, where will the kids grow? With the man?

Isn't it better your sister is alive to take care of her children, pursue her career and live a meaningful life with your supports?

I would think some measures against him like a family meeting, confronting him either physically or over the phone so that he can be aware that he is being watched would have been taken by you guys.

Before thinking of reporting to ministry of women affairs and showing them the video evidence with a confidential agreement signed that the video will not leak.

It is better your sister is alive to blame you guys for “destroying" her marriage than for her to be dead from an abusive marriage and you guys have to live with the guilt, pain and anger at yourselves and the man.
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by minasu190: 3:35pm On Jan 24, 2025
Help your sister the best you can, to avoid continuous abuse from this animal, unless your sister won't last long before she kpai.
And funniest part the woman beater will be somewhere flirting different kinds of woman,while your sister dey chop beating like water, she needs help,she scared to speak out.
SAY NO TO DOMESTIC VIOLENCE!
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by Telltruth123: 3:53pm On Jan 24, 2025
Preston114:
Recently one of my sisters went to visit our elder sister and found out that her husband has been assaulting her. According to my sister who went visiting, she said the first time she noticed this, she perceived some struggles in the apartment and decided to check what exactly was happening only to find my elder sister pinned to the wall by her husband and held tightly on her neck that she was grasping for breath.

When I was informed about this, it felt so disheartening. I called my sister in question and enquired what was happening as none of us ever knew that she was going through such in her marriage. She swept the topic under the rug with an excuse that it had never happened before and it was just a misunderstanding. I felt something off but I thought we should let it slide since my sister does not seem interested in us taking actions.

Early this morning, I got another call from my other sister that the husband is assaulting her again and this time it was more serious. She shared a video evidence with me and it sincerely broke my heart. However, I asked her to delete the video so it does not erroneously get to the public as she was naked in the video.

It's important to mention that they have been married for more than 10 years. I sincerely don't know the root cause of their issue. However, I find it hard to understand how fellow men get to this point of battering their wives without any sense of remorse.

I'm not in Nigeria so I'm constrained on the actions I can take from my current location. I was making an arrangement with a friend to help me deploy some soldiers do their house but I had to pend it as I was informed that he has left the house and when he does that he probably stays out for a week before coming back home. I guess this is part of the issues they are having.

My parents are quite old hence, I would like to coordinate necessary actions on this issue myself. Although my sister is appealing that we overlook the matter as her concern is to keep her marriage. She's not even considering her safety.

Can I file a report with human rights activist on behalf of my sister? If yes I would appreciate advice on how to do this.
Call the husband, ask him what is the reason why both of them are fighting everytime to the point where people are calling you and telling you that your sister life is in serious danger, Initially, your ignore but the calls are now much to the point that people are saying if your sister died that the blood will be on the family because you did not take action.
Then if his response shows regret you try and settle the matter but let him know that if anything happen to her, the law will take is course, he should not go violent with her again.
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by Kobojunkie: 3:57pm On Jan 24, 2025
Telltruth123:
➜Call the husband, ask him what is the reason why both of them are fighting everytime to the point where people are calling you and telling you that your sister life is in serious danger, Initially, your ignore but the calls are now much to the point that people are saying if your sister died that the blood will be on the family because you did not take action.
Then if his response shows regret you try and settle the matter but let him know that if anything happen to her, the law will take is course, he should not go violent with her again
.
Nigerians are wicked abeg! Reading through many of these posts you can't help but realize how Osinachi eventually ended up food for worms and her kids orphaned! 😂😂😂😂😂😂
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by PaZwoD: 5:14pm On Jan 24, 2025
Free2Fly:
How did you arrive at the conclusion that the man, not your sister, is the problem?
So, battering the wife is the solution to the problem?
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by franugo(m): 5:38pm On Jan 24, 2025
Free2Fly:
How did you arrive at the conclusion that the man, not your sister, is the problem?
there is no excuse to beat your wife. Hope you're not one of the unfortunate man-kids that beat their significant other that they've promised to love and cherish for the rest of their lives?
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by G0Oodharddick: 5:50pm On Jan 24, 2025
Preston114:
This guy was literally out of work for two years and during this period all his friends deserted him. My family had all hands on deck to provide financial support for them during those trying times. To see how he became a monster after getting back on his feet hits me by surprise
Get a lawyer and brief him. Also send the video to him as a evidence to rely on.

Whatever actions u want the court to take is in your hands
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by Free2Fly: 5:53pm On Jan 24, 2025
franugo:
there is no excuse to beat your wife. Hope you're not one of the unfortunate man-kids that beat their significant other that they've promised to love and cherish for the rest of their lives?
Mumu, what if it's always the woman that gives the first blow?
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by Kobojunkie: 5:55pm On Jan 24, 2025
Mumben:
Marriages of nowadays, just recently a man burnt his wife at abagana. Pls do everything in your power to save your sister abeg. Her life matters. I don't think I can endure that kind of abuse oh, I for don pack my children run go my papa house.
OP claims his sister married the monster as a virgin. She is probably under the delusion that the fact that the man was her first bedmate, somehow love will magically save her and turn the man into a good prince. Awon Osinachi gang .... I married my husband as a virgin therefore he must be good to me no matter how much panel beating I am made to endure in the process. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

No one can recreate the level of deluded nonsense that people like that spew abeg! 😂😂😂😂😂
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by Free2Fly: 5:55pm On Jan 24, 2025
PaZwoD:
So, battering the wife is the solution to the problem?
Address my question first.
How did you know he's battering her, and not trying to defend himself??
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by Babangidapikin: 6:21pm On Jan 24, 2025
You need to talk to your Sister first , so you know what is triggering the provocation, trail him, where does he goes to, does he have a side chick or is he a side cock , so you know if there is another party holding the village people's remote .
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by franugo(m): 7:25pm On Jan 24, 2025
Free2Fly:
Mumu, what if it's always the woman that gives the first blow?
Most women are emotional creatures. It behooves on you as the man to have a better rein on your emotions. If it's getting out of hand, walk away to get a better handle on things. It's not a good thing to manhandle your spouse oga
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by ezugegere(m): 7:49pm On Jan 24, 2025
Have you called the man in question to hear from him and to warn him seriously?
That would be my first step if I were you?
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by Kobojunkie: 7:50pm On Jan 24, 2025
ezugegere:
➜Have you called the man in question to hear from him and to warn him seriously?
That would be my first step if I were you?
Does warning him to change the fact that the relationship has long become toxic and is almost guaranteed to escalate? undecided

OP said he even got a video of the man assaulting his naked sister, this after the first report that the same man was seen choking her. Does talking to the man change this fact or would it lead to this man changing after what may be many years of this assault? huh
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by ezugegere(m): 7:51pm On Jan 24, 2025
Kobojunkie:
Does warning him to change the fact that the relationship has long become toxic and is almost guaranteed to escalate? undecided
Warning him could change a lot of things.
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by Kobojunkie: 7:53pm On Jan 24, 2025
ezugegere:
➜Warning him could change a lot of things.
How? How many cases of such have you yourself encountered in your own life? Do you suddenly change a bad habit after a talking to? Most children don't change after merely getting a talking to' a caretaker typically has to continue working with the kids regularly for an extended period before that can become the case. So tell me how you expect an adult to change immediately after being talked to in this case. undecided
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by ezugegere(m): 7:55pm On Jan 24, 2025
Kobojunkie:
How? How many cases of such have you yourself encountered in your own life? Do you suddenly change a bad habit after a talking to? undecided
Madam, you are too toxic and I don't like responding to you. Could you just keep off my mention pls!
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by Kobojunkie: 7:56pm On Jan 24, 2025
ezugegere:
➜Madam, you are too toxic and I don't like responding to you. Could you just keep off my mention pls!
My urging you to honestly reason your statement is to blame for the toxicity described by OP as the reality of his sister's marriage, abi? 🙄🙄🙄🙄
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by We4all: 8:04pm On Jan 24, 2025
Awon wife beaters and awon "I must stay married" crew deserve each other. Your sister is an adult, but has choose to be stupid. Pls, let her be.
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by delugadou(m): 8:25pm On Jan 24, 2025
Preston114:
This guy was literally out of work for two years and during this period all his friends deserted him. My family had all hands on deck to provide financial support for them during those trying times. To see how he became a monster after getting back on his feet hits me by surprise
This is how he pays you for your kindness. There's no sugar-coating here. Your sister is about to be killed. Don't go to human rights.

Find out when he will be at home, especially at night. Then mobilize soldiers there. Let them break in and threaten him violently. Ignore whatever excuses your sister is giving. Life is at stake here.

The soldiers should make it clear that the next time he beats his wife will also be his last. I hate ungrateful people.
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by NoToPile: 8:46pm On Jan 24, 2025
Hmmm.

This one is a life or death situation not couples quarell.

One single mistake while beating her and it will be the end.

A life is involved, life first.
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by Helpout12345: 8:47pm On Jan 24, 2025
Preston114:
It's really heart breaking. Like how does someone endure this kind of pain all in the name of saving her marriage.
Domestic violence should not be tolerated at all.

But I think you are running over emotion now. Do the following

1. Separate your sister from the house for now.
2. Look for people that can talk to your sister to open up her side of the story
3. Call the husband and hear his side of the story. Be calm while doing this. Don't let emotions overrun you.
4. Find out who is the person starting the violence at home. It could be either party.
5. If they can't settle their issues without violence, they should stay separated.
6. If both are willing to stop violence, you can work on settling their matter.
Re: How Can I Report This Issue On Behalf Of My Married Sister? by Kobojunkie: 8:48pm On Jan 24, 2025
Karleb:
It's either you send police to arrest that man or you start saving for your sister's burial. undecided
Another Osinachi loading... sad
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