₦airaland Forum

Bobodee09:
Honestly bro ......men are only loved for what they bring Honestly.

This my uncle is just a stong man Honestly, cos he was locked up countless time by different people.

This women left him at his lowest, abused and shamed him several times.


This woman first left in 2021 for about 3 months, she left the kids with my uncle. She claimed she need her head cleared.
2022 she finally moved out with the kids.....we heard rumor she was with a man but no one really cared cos the husband was just doing his thing without any drama.

Only we his family stood by him cos the man sure when things was good for him.

Nasoo the life be bro, na why you no need to do pass ur self, you think say if your uncle don kpai she no go live her life

In anything in life just fight for your life first ooo even the children self go survive, na who die him own finished.

Samantha125:
Lol... Already I knew you were going to bring up my father into this which I find to be very funny and lame, is that the best you can say? Try something else...🤣🤣🤣

You being this overly defensive and emotional only tells me that you're hiding something and not telling us everything about your uncle.

Ehya ........maybe you should come along on Tuesday so you can hear and see those things am hiding about uncle.
The address is alausa secretariat women affairs department.

slowpoke like you never see anything wrong in this type of wickedness until it happens to your son or brothers

Bobodee09:
My uncle received a text and call yesterday from lagos state women affairs department. He is being summon for interrogation on Tuesday regarding a petition from his wife.
His wife has denied him access to his children (2 girls ,1 boy).
January this year he told us he won't pay there fees and upkeep anymore.

A co-operate scam him sometime in 2019, he was a big time farmer and alot of people joined base on his recommendations. He stood as guarantor for the organization.
When the organization disappear with people money he was forced to settle, he sold most of his properties and his business crashed.

The wife left him in 2022 saying she tired of suffering, she moved out with the kids. My uncle have being paying school fees and sending upkeep, he get to see them anytime he want aswell up on till last year.

Last year my uncle got help from a widow he met at a church, she invested in his business and things are getting better for him financially.

My uncle told us on the family whatapp group January he wont pay the kids school fee anymore and placed a curse down for anyone who does on his behalf due the fact the wife have denied him access to his kids since last year may.

His wife reported him to human rights last month, after hearing from both side they told her to allow him see his kids but she refuse claiming he now has another wife and she scared the woman might harm her kids. My uncle hasn't married the woman although they are dating.


Where I need advise is what should we expect on Tuesday? If my uncle doesn't change his mind what will happen.

Lastly his wife works for lagos isnt that an advantage for her, will the case be judge fairly.

dominique, farano, Rocktation

Your uncle can honor the invite however, I suggest he should go with his lawyer.

Your uncle did traditional and church wedding, he didn't do court wedding, so I think a magistrate court can dissolve the marriage. It could have been more difficult if he did a legal marriage (registry) as well.

Your uncle should file for divorce on grounds that his wife has been separated from him for more than 2 years and for irreconcilable differences. It is important to base the filing for divorce on his wife's decision to separate from him for over two years now.

He can use the opportunity of the invitation to address the need for proper divorce. Propose some agreements between him and his wife on the handling of the kids with respect to:

1. Medical care
2. School expenses
3. Upkeep payment monthly
4. Shared holidays
5. Custody of the children
6. Divorce

This agreement can be ratified and simply endorsed or adopted by the judge in the magistrate court and then everything is solved. Your uncle can go ahead to marry the other woman in his life and his ex-wife can do whatever she wants too.

Anyone, between the two of them that violates the agreement approved by the judge, can be prosecuted in court subsequently.

It is important to engage a lawyer now, this is a little straight forward case, negotiate the bill of the lawyer to a reasonable fee.

That is my advice.

Let's hear the lady's side of the story first.

Because you're just ranting, but not saying anything at the same time.

Bobodee09:
Ehya ........maybe you should come along on Tuesday so you can hear and see those things am hiding about uncle.
The address is alausa secretariat women affairs department.

slowpoke like you never see anything wrong in this type of wickedness until it happens to your son or brothers

Apparently the woman works with lagos state , she's earning salary , who says she can't use her money to take care of the children. Even in USA and advance countries, you can only hide the children from the father if the father is a drug addict or something related. How can you hide children from their father in a case where you were the one who even left the marriage because the man lost his business

Samantha125:
It would still not be the children's fault that they grew up the way that they did, so why punish them?

So you'd prefer for them to be dropouts and resort to doing crime or even prostitution to make ends meet just because you had a fallout with their mother?

Samantha125:
Let's hear the lady's side of the story first.

Because you're just ranting, but not saying anything at the same time.

Delulu you already got an invite to come hear her own side of the story on Tuesday.

Or do you need her private number and house address aswell.

That's why I'm saying he might've been abusive and subjecting the children to trauma.

Him losing his business might've prompted him to take out his frustrations on both his wife and the kids.

You know how you men tend to get insecured whenever you lose your jobs and would start taking your frustrations out on your loved ones... And this story is so far one sided.

koladata:
Apparently the woman works with lagos state , she's earning salary , who says she can't use her money to take care of the children. Even in USA and advance countries, you can only hide the children from the father if the father is a drug addict or something related. How can you hide children from their father in a case where you were the one who even left the marriage because the man lost his business

Okay...

Bobodee09:
Delulu you already got an invite to come her own side of the story on Tuesday.

Or do you her private number and house address aswell.

My brother if women dey do man and man still dey do man , then where is the support system ? , what happened to for better for worse, there's no place where it was stated that the man is abusive, and if he is, the woman already left him when he needed her the most so let the court decide that there was an abuse and until then he should start paying the child support again without seeing the children. Obviously the woman is trying to get back to the man because his business is getting better , and the only bait she has are the children. There's no two ways about this , its a trick they play since inception of time.

Samantha125:
That's why I'm saying he might've been abusive and subjecting the children to trauma.

Him losing his business might've prompted him to take out his frustrations on both his wife and the kids.

You know how you men tend to get insecured whenever you lose your jobs and would start taking your frustrations out on your loved ones... And this story is so far one sided.

Did you just call me your brother? ... Ouch! This man just broke me into hundred pieces and finished me...😭😭😭

Why mara why? Me your brother? That hurts more than all the nairaland insults combined together...😭😭😭😭... When did I grow a pair?🤔🤔🤔

koladata:
My brother if women dey do man and man still dey do man , then where is the support system ? , what happened to for better for worse, there's no place where it was stated that the man is abusive, and if he is, the woman already left him when he needed her the most so let the court decide that there was an abuse and until then he should start paying the child support again without seeing the children. Obviously the woman is trying to get back to the man because his business is getting better , and the only bait she has are the children. There's no two ways about this , its a trick they play since inception of time.

Samantha125:
The money is for the best interest of the children.

This is not about her, but about the children.

And removing the father figure away from the lives of the children while making them witness your hostility towards their father is IN THEIR BEST INTEREST right?

If the man had held on to the kids and gone off to another city to make it difficult for their mother to reach them, would you still say the same?

You are just a mentally immature, gaslighting, self serving bastard.

At bolded, yes, I'd have said the same thing... We can't just conclude without hearing both sides of the story.

It's funny how you're calling me mentally immatured, yet you're the one raining insults at me...😂😂😂... Keep up the good work...😂😂😂

AllBlack:
And removing the father figure away from the lives of the children while making them witness your hostility towards their father is IN THEIR BEST INTEREST right?

If the man had held on to the kids and gone off to another city to make it difficult for their mother to reach them, would you still say the same?

You are just a mentally immature, gaslighting, self serving bastard.

Na South African men dey kpai their woman pass. One mumu up there is concerned about Nigerian men being abusive... I spit on you

This samosa or Samantha girl is just intentionally foolish. I could remember a post she made a about how her sister- a baby mama was taking advantage of an innocent man who wanted to marry her. The idiot even connived with her sister to defraud the man. It shows that stupidity and selfishness runs in her blood.

As usual, she will reply me with one incoherent answer and add a teeth shinning emogi like an slowpoke.

Someone narrated the ordeal his uncle is facing and seeks advice. The empty headed she goat instead of her to give her advice, she stated an intentional gaslighting. If you wan hear the woman own side, come to the court venue that get your answer. Ewu!

Samantha125:
The money is for the best interest of the children.

This is not about her, but about the children.

And you being emotional and raining insults at me already says a lot about your level of reasoning... An empty barrel always resorts to insults whenever it has nothing valuable to add to the table... So continue with your insults, I won't be bothered...😃😃😃😃

If she can't take care of the kids financially,let her return the kids to who can take care. What rubbish defense are you even putting up here?

What if he's abusive? You'd want the children to be subjected to childhood trauma?

Myrepublic:
If she can't take care of the kids financially,let her return the kids to who can take care. What rubbish defense are you even putting up here?

Samantha125:
What if he's abusive? You'd want the children to be subjected to childhood trauma?

How come she stayed having three kids,if he was abusive? I doubt if he is abusive.. The woman might have even been the problem (cheat)

That's what most married women are into these days. I see some in my work place all the time. Going on date during break period with other men,all in the name of buying them lunch. I pity their husbands,each time I see them doing their office romance and all.

The man didn't even say she should come back,he wants his kids that's all. He can't be assaulting his kids,even if he was a wife beater . So that's not an excuse baby girl.

And he also should run DNA test on those kids,this one that she is hiding the kids from their "dad". It might be he is not their real dad, probably she just want to use him to pay bills. Op take note.. tell your brother to run DNA test,if he finally have access to the kids

Allow him have access to his kids, because he wants to be sure they are even safe. What if the wife is maltreating them where they are?

So,if he won't allow him access,she should as well be able to pay their bills,until she is ready to allow them see their dad.

It's very simple baby girl.. You should understand that Nigerian men aren't like those weak SA men..

Can't he find a way to take the children away from the witch? With money, anything can be done. Tell him to set her up with something and take his kids through the courts. These day, I pay evil with evil because evil people understand no other language except evil language. If na me, by now she will be in court fighting to prove that she is mentally capable to raise the children and not be dangerous to them.

Namaster:
Your uncle is on the EIGHT track.

I especially like the part about laying PRE-PACKAGED curses on misguided Good Samaritans.

The WICKED woman kidnapped his kids and PREVENTS him from seeing them. She even went against the resolutions of a mediated agreement just to continue her WICKEDNESS.

YET she wants his money so that she can LIE to the kids and PRETEND to be ONLY one taking care of them in order to form SUPERMOMMY.

FUCCCK THE BITCH!

Advise your uncle to NOT pay shishi!

If the ex-wife is bent on ALIENATING him from his kids, then she can FOOT the bills.

The woman is trying to DESTROY your uncle. Imagine accusing him of emotionally-ABUSING the kids she actively RESTRICTS from seeing their father.

Let him IGNORE that useless invitation until it becomes a court case. Especially since it sounds like he doesn't live in Lagos.

When it gets to court, NOBODY will ask him to pay money without granting him the right to see his kids.

Plus, the human rights NGO can testify to the fact that the ex-wife is a CONTENTIOUS woman who disregarded a viable resolution that'd be great for the kids.

Instead, she used them as PAWNS in her unhinged quest to punish their father.

In fact, let your uncle file a COURT case against the bitch. Let him consult with a lawyer and see if a case of kidnapping and emotional abuse can be filed against her.

TWO can play the game.

He doesn't have to REACT to her madness when he can orchestrate his own.

Plus, the bitch is a government worker who is likely BROKE and unable to afford a decent lawyer for any long period of time.

Let him RUIN her financially until she begs. Then ruin her some MORE.

Oil dey ur head bro

The woman is mad..Isn’t she also dating someone else?..Nevertheless the kids are his responsibility..

I stand by your uncle. The woman can't eat her cake and have it . The court will grant ur uncle undeniable access to his kids. The issue whether he is now with another woman or just dating is irrelevant. According to law , father will not be responsible for the kids if he is denied access to the children. Thank God she's out of your uncle's life . She would have been his doom.

Myrepublic:
How come she stayed having three kids,if he was abusive? I doubt if he is abusive.. The woman might have even been the problem (cheat)

That's who most married women are into days. I see some in my work place all the time. Going on date during break period with other men,all in the name of buying them lunch. I pity their husbands,each time I see them doing their office romance and all.

The man didn't even say she should come back,he wants his kids that's all. He can't be assaulting his kids,even if he was a wife beater . So that's not an excuse baby girl.

And he also should run DNA test on those kids,this one that she is hiding the kids from their "dad". It might be he is not their real dad, probably she just want to use him to pay bills. Op take note.. tell your brother to run DNA test,if he finally have access to the kids

Allow him have access to his kids, because he wants to be sure they are even safe. What if the wife is maltreating them where they are?

So,if he won't allow him access,she should as well be able to pay their bills,until she is ready to allow them see their dad.

It's very simple baby girl.. You should understand that Nigerian men aren't like those weak SA men..

That moniker is a Nigerian guy pretending to be SA female bro.

Don't waste your time on him.

Bobodee09:
I guess you blind to fact the wife is also using him having a new woman to get back at him and punish the kids from seeing there father.

Abi o.. don't mind d fellow

Many women endure a lot of crap from you guys and you should know this by now... Some would even die in the hands of their abusive husbands hoping that one day they'll change.

And you just proved my point when I said that it appears like most of you Nigerian men would be abusive towards your women and then play the victim card afterwards, you have this narcissistic behaviour whereby you always believe that you can never be wrong... You're now making up stories that you have no proof of just so your fellow man can be perceived as the victim.

You guys are the Kings of manipulation... And you're right when you say you guys aren't weak, because you're abusive manipulators who take pride in oppressing their women... That's why most of them wait until they get to Europe to open cases of domestic violence against you... They no longer have faith in the Nigerian justice system as it has failed them many times before... One of your brothers here in SA is also currently trying to use his children to fight his battles with their mother because he can't face her head on... But unfortunately for him, this is not Nigeria and his plans won't work here...😂😂😂

Myrepublic:
How come she stayed having three kids,if he was abusive? I doubt if he is abusive.. The woman might have even been the problem (cheat)

That's who most married women are into days. I see some in my work place all the time. Going on date during break period with other men,all in the name of buying them lunch. I pity their husbands,each time I see them doing their office romance and all.

The man didn't even say she should come back,he wants his kids that's all. He can't be assaulting his kids,even if he was a wife beater . So that's not an excuse baby girl.

And he also should run DNA test on those kids,this one that she is hiding the kids from their "dad". It might be he is not their real dad, probably she just want to use him to pay bills. Op take note.. tell your brother to run DNA test,if he finally have access to the kids

Allow him have access to his kids, because he wants to be sure they are even safe. What if the wife is maltreating them where they are?

So,if he won't allow him access,she should as well be able to pay their bills,until she is ready to allow them see their dad.

It's very simple baby girl.. You should understand that Nigerian men aren't like those weak SA men..

Bobodee09:
That moniker is a Nigerian guy pretending to be SA female bro.

Don't waste your time on him.

Really? That already shows how shallow minded the slow poke is.. Thanks for the info

koladata:
That you father a child biologically doesn't mean they are your children when a woman wants to deal with you. If you like pay 4 million per term, those children will still grow up hating you if that's what the woman wants... so what's the point, you grow old being poor just because you want to please a child that has grown up to hate you.

You may claim the children will later find out the truth but what if he dies before the truth comes out. Life na one o. His uncle has done the right thing. I can't be paying school fees of children i don't have access to. I can't

Mehn ur words strong o but it's true.

Bobodee09:
My uncle received a text and call yesterday from lagos state women affairs department. He is being summon for interrogation on Tuesday regarding a petition from his wife.
His wife has denied him access to his children (2 girls ,1 boy).
January this year he told us he won't pay there fees and upkeep anymore.

A co-operate scam him sometime in 2019, he was a big time farmer and alot of people joined base on his recommendations. He stood as guarantor for the organization.
When the organization disappear with people money he was forced to settle, he sold most of his properties and his business crashed.

The wife left him in 2022 saying she tired of suffering, she moved out with the kids. My uncle have being paying school fees and sending upkeep, he get to see them anytime he want aswell up on till last year.

Last year my uncle got help from a widow he met at a church, she invested in his business and things are getting better for him financially.

My uncle told us on the family whatapp group January he wont pay the kids school fee anymore and placed a curse down for anyone who does on his behalf due the fact the wife have denied him access to his kids since last year may.

His wife reported him to human rights last month, after hearing from both side they told her to allow him see his kids but she refuse claiming he now has another wife and she scared the woman might harm her kids. My uncle hasn't married the woman although they are dating.


Where I need advise is what should we expect on Tuesday? If my uncle doesn't change his mind what will happen.

Lastly his wife works for lagos isnt that an advantage for her, will the case be judge fairly.

dominique, farano, Rocktation

simply mind your business. He has made up his mind, he should be man enough to face whatever. It is his own business

Samantha125:
So far we haven't heard her side of the story... Because it's like you Nigerian men have tendency of being abusive towards your wives, only to play victims when they leave you and refuse you access to your children.

You rope in the kids each time y'all have a dispute with your husbands, which is very bad must you people always involve the children to get back at the man

Would you prefer the women to endure their abusive husbands and subject the children to early childhood trauma?

Because one thing I've noticed about you Nigerian men is that you're quick to point other nations for GBV while you sympathise with the abusers in your country... Those ladies who'd try speaking up would get dragged and threatened.

Lamasta:
You rope in the kids each time y'all have a dispute with your husbands, which is very bad must you people always involve the children to get back at the man

Samantha125:
So your uncle decided to punish his children to get back at his wife, nice.

Is that Jennyclay, Samantha has better understanding than this

If it's for human rights, forget about the petition. The matter will be settled amicably without any objections. When such matters are taken there, they only want a redress