₦airaland Forum

Parent do have favorite child, it takes an extra observation to detect the favorite in the family, most parent do hide it while some parent especially the father don’t care to show it.

Samantha125:
Of course they do... Over the years, I think I've fallen under the category of my mom's least favourite child because unlike the rest of my siblings who are more laid back and reserved, I've always been the outspoken and feisty one, I call a spade a spade regardless of who you are, I don't beat around the bush... And since I'm now an independent adult, her manipulations no longer work on me as I've grown accustomed to them... ... In fact, I'm now the one manipulating her because I've learnt from the best...

That alone has pushed me to be more closer to my father and the man has been my biggest fan since day one... I'm who I am today because of him.

You are lucky,and he who finds a girl like you.

Most girls who are closer to their dads make good wives and great achievers.

S girl child's first boifren is her dad.

I don't know about you, i love my kids equally.

They are the reason i wake up early and hustle.

They are LOVED the same

That's worse when you marry a single momma as she would definitely love her 'love child(ren)" much more than she would for your kid(s).

The love is just different and cannot be put on a single scale. A stubborn child may actually be very very brilliant and learns quickly. He may be aggressive but then you see him protecting his junior ones outside outside house. You may fight with him at home over those qualities of carelessness and stubbornness but then you live him deeply, just different from the calm and calculated one

Where's the data to support your statement?

Because some of these allegations are just stereotypes used to shame children raised by single mothers... Some daughters raised by their fathers still make bad life choices like any other, it has nothing to do with who raised them.

tiswell:
You are lucky,and he who finds a girl like you.

Most girls who are closer to their dads make good wives and great achievers.

S girl child's first boifren is her dad.

Samantha125:
Where's the data to support your statement?

Because some of these allegations are just stereotypes used to shame children raised by single mothers... Some daughters raised by their fathers still make bad life choices like any other, it has nothing to do with who raised them.

now,this assertion of yours was possible because you are psychologically balanced.

Don't try to water down father-issues syndrome in a girl child's life

My mum never loved me, and my dad hated me. I'm in despair, and things can never be the same.

No

EmperorIsaac:
Not equally...but with equity. No two souls are the same on earth. You tailor your "love" to peculiarities.

The most agreeable comment here.

kennyz247:
And mostly the most unloved/hated child always become the rock of the house in future..

Or they become resentful.

obembet:
My Dearest Nairalanders,. here we go today!

I strongly believe All children in a family should be treated equally, to prevent psychological problems. But sometimes, parents do have a special favourite.

Although, it is possible for parents to have a stronger emotional bond with one child over another, though this can vary based on numerous factors. The funniest part is that
Most parents are not aware that they may have a favorite child and generally feel that they love all their children the same.

Is there anyway to love all the kids in a family equality?

Capital NO

Goldbw122:
My mum never loved me, and my dad hated me. I'm in despair, and things can never be the same.

Don't be quick to judge bro. Maybe they want to correct Ur wrong doing by showing some attitude which u Tag as hatred

A parent can only pretend to love all the children equally but that is just self-deceit.

No human being can love two people equally.

Konection:
I don't know about you, i love my kids equally.

They are the reason i wake up early and hustle.

They are LOVED the same

No one said you don’t love them. But you have one that is your favorite.

That one that when the mum spanks, it feels like they are spanking you. 🤣

I love my children greatly, different and for different reasons. They are unique gifts from God with diverse and sometimes different behaviors, different approaches and nuances.

My kids are my world.

God is the creator of all,but HE isn't the father to all....HE said Jacob I loved,Esua I detest,in as much as Esua was very very successful in the land he dwelt.

Betnomore:
➜It's all about striking a balance and letting the children understand the importance of reward and punishment. Communication is key as children assume a lot. One needs to communicate with the children. It's just like when you discipline your child. You let them understand that you have no animosity towards them and let dem realize that. Same goes for when you reward a child. The love can never be equal but at least there is balance which wouldn't tilt the scale of love in a glaring manner. Just my 2 cents as that's how I treat my children

. Favoritism is beyond just that. Imagine a situation where a parent shops for expensive clothing and toys for one particular child— without fail—while the others either get regular brands or hand-me-downs. I have seen parents who would do anything that one kid says, but rack up excuses for why the other kid should not expect the same treatment, and the excuses are usually atrocious.

Konection:
➜I don't know about you, i love my kids equally. They are the reason i wake up early and hustle. They are LOVED the same

...

RillJ:
I love my children greatly, different and for different reasons. They are unique gifts from God with diverse and sometimes different behaviors, different approaches and nuances. My kids are my world.

...Those parents who live in denial of this issue are usually the worst.

Zocalite:
➜Are you basing your assumption on the kind of parents around you

Of course! I base it on the kind of parents I have personally encountered.

DenreleDave:
lies

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Coly2012:
➜Kids are human, you can't love them all equally just as you don't love you siblings and parent equally, as a father I found out that I have come to love me boys differently based on their personalities,intelligency and gifts.
All I do is to show them how i love them equally but deep down I no what I feel about each of them .
I have taken time to ask them severally who they think is dad's favorite, and every time they always say different thing because even them are confused just like their mother.
E no eazy at all to mentain order and sanity.

No dey deceive yourself. Your children are aware of the imbalance. They might lie to you in order to make you feel good about yourself, but they are aware!

That is bad parenting. Simple as ABC. Favoritism should be in ones mind and not obvious in action

Kobojunkie:
. Favoritism is beyond just that. Imagine a situation where a parent shops for expensive clothing and toys for one particular child— without fail—while the others either get regular brands or hand-me-downs. I have seen parents who would do anything that one kid says, but rack up excuses for why the other kid should not expect the same treatment, and the excuses are usually atrocious.

Danisaint112:
➜It happens when they are all responsible, but 99% of the time, it doesn’t. The reason it doesn’t happen is because of the bad character children exhibit. Respect you see begins at home and reflects in Life. Discipline and respect often determine how much love and blessing children receive from their parents. While responsible parenting is key, children also play a major role. Those who are obedient and loyal tend to experience deeper affection and support. Unfortunately, when children talk back, disrespect, or even harm their parents, it creates emotional or physical wounds that can affect the relationship permanently.
Personally, even as an adult, I would never raise my voice at my mother—let alone insult her. When I see others do it, I’m genuinely shocked.
Respect is powerful. It’s often the reason people return—even after mistakes. A man may err, but if the woman he’s with carries herself with deep respect and dignity, he’ll often come back, humbled. As men, we don’t mind going the extra mile or making sacrifices for a woman who is respectful, wise, and loyal. Sadly, many marriages fail today not because of lack of love, but because of lack of mutual respect. Whether you’re a son, daughter, husband, or wife—respect is a foundation you can’t afford to ignore.

I can't believe what I just read?

See what I mean about parents needing to be self-aware to recognize the problem. Just imagine this poster attempting to provide justification for why children should not be treated equally by their parents. He even suggests that children who don't show parents enough respect and loyalty should be loved less. 😩😩😩😩😩

Betnomore:
That is bad parenting. Simple as ABC. Favoritism should be in ones mind and not obvious in action

. But our actions are typically driven by our thoughts.

I hope some of you know that child favouritism can cause mental illness: narcissism. Google/ chatgpt it. If you know you are guilty stop immediately or you will regret it when the child grows old.
Introducing child leadership rotation is a good way to cancel child favouritism. Good luck

obembet:
My Dearest Nairalanders,. here we go today!

I strongly believe All children in a family should be treated equally, to prevent psychological problems. But sometimes, parents do have a special favourite.

Although, it is possible for parents to have a stronger emotional bond with one child over another, though this can vary based on numerous factors. The funniest part is that
Most parents are not aware that they may have a favorite child and generally feel that they love all their children the same.

Is there anyway to love all the kids in a family equality?

Nature did not permit living everyone equally even when those people are doing the same thing for you.

Even God the Creator of all, picked Israel as His favorite people.

As a parent, there is this your child that understands every of your body languages, the child is always around you. That will always be your favourite.
It doesn't mean that the gap between the child and others will be so wide that it will make the others feel uncared for.
Most times, that your favorite is not always the one you give things more than the others.

My favorite is that one that I always call and send on errands cos I know he/she will deliver very well more than others.

If I want to go out, I'll go with that one. The others will even be feeling that they have more time and space to play while the favorite is always around me not having time to play.
But they will not understand that they're are things he/she is learning that will help him/her in future more than them.

I still disciplines my favorite child same way I do to others.
The others know that because my favorite is always close to me, is easier for him/her to tell me what he/she needs especially school stuff or casual entertainments. Do they will always come to my favorite and request that he/she should go and tell Daddy that they want so so and so things.
Him/her bn the favorite had never bn an issue in the house cos I never allowed myself to treat the favorite far better than the rest.

focus234:
I hope some of you know that child favouritism can cause mental illness: narcissism. Google/ chatgpt it. If you know you are guilty stop immediately or you will regret it when the child grows old.
Introducing child leadership rotation is a good way to cancel child favouritism. Good luck

I am a victim of child favouritism, it's affected my mental health....

The worst form of child favouritism is in a polygamous home.

@OP can you discipline your kids equally?

Psoul:
➜Nature did not permit living everyone equally even when those people are doing the same thing for you. Even God the Creator of all, picked Israel as His favorite people.
As a parent, there is this your child that understands every of your body languages, the child is always around you. That will always be your favourite.It doesn't mean that the gap between the child and others will be so wide that it will make the others feel uncared for.
Most times, that your favorite is not always the one you give things more than the others. My favorite is that one that I always call and send on errands cos I know he/she will deliver very well more than others. If I want to go out, I'll go with that one. The others will even be feeling that they have more time and space to play while the favorite is always around me not having time to play.
But they will not understand that they're are things he/she is learning that will help him/her in future more than them. I still disciplines my favorite child same way I do to others.The others know that because my favorite is always close to me, is easier for him/her to tell me what he/she needs especially school stuff or casual entertainments. Do they will always come to my favorite and request that he/she should go and tell Daddy that they want so so and so things.
Him/her bn the favorite had never bn an issue in the house cos I never allowed myself to treat the favorite far better than the rest.

Nature and your gods have nothing to do with what is clearly a human behavioral problem. I have seen foster parents — non-biological parents, by the way— capable of loving their children equally. However, I have yet to meet biological parents who can do the same. It is weird.

shoboy9:
@OP can you discipline your kids equally?

Why not?

Kobojunkie:
I can't believe what I just read?

See what I mean about parents needing to be self-aware to recognize the problem. Just imagine this poster attempting to provide justification for why children should not be treated equally by their parents. He even suggests that children who don't show parents enough respect and loyalty should be loved less. 😩😩😩😩😩

Being treated equal is different from love. Don't mix it up. Only an irresponsible parent promote partiality.

A parent can love all their children but there would always be one they would always love and cherish more and this is usually tied to their character.

It’s either the child has a bad character and the parents support evil, or the child upholds good character and the parents hate evil. This is a fact that has been known for ages.

Maybe you are used to insulting your parents or talking back at them reason you found my harmless comment offensive.