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Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? - Family (3) - Nairaland

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Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by GboyegaD(m): 4:41pm On Jun 16, 2025
It depends on what the issue is. It could be any of those listed on there.
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by Xammie001(m): 4:48pm On Jun 16, 2025
one of my siblings
i trust her die and it's always a safe space talking to her.
Chilipepper:
We all face tough moments in life times when we feel overwhelmed, confused, or just need someone to talk to. Among this list, who is that one person you feel safe confiding in when things get really hard?
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by dalass(f): 4:48pm On Jun 16, 2025
enemyofprogress:
with all dis things wey Tinubu dey do us in Nigeria, e no reach to craze?
This has me laughing all by myself... no kill pesin with laff abeg grin grin grin grin
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by dalass(f): 4:50pm On Jun 16, 2025
Chief2410:
sometimes talking to oneself isn't sign of insanity.everybody has his style of handling difficult situations.
Exactly 💯... But don't sha let people see you talking to yourself, people will be thinking say na Aro patient be dat grin
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by Wande22(m): 4:52pm On Jun 16, 2025
ravensckar:
I confide in my friends any day any time twice on Monday.

They can relate and they can be less judgemental and together we can find a way forward.

But you see my parents (my dad especially), he can be very judgemental and be sure he will cast you later. Somebody that once helped me treat a stubborn gonorrhea lasan, all his public sermons for that week was about shunning adultery. He repeated the sermon to the extent that everyone knew something was up.

My mama own be sey after she don comfort you, she'll use that thing to be blackmailing you. You'll hear stuff like when you were sacked from work and you were penniless, shebi I was there for you. All your useless girlfriends ran away. If you don't give me what I asked for, I'll tell the whole world how I was there for you and how you didn't want to take care of me now that you've bounced back. I'll just be like; "O.K, I surrender". cheesy cheesy

As for my wife, she'll stay with you o, she'll comfort you but she'll be reminding you twice every day of how she stood by you. She won't blackmail you, but she'll never stop singing it to your ears how she's a good wife and your everything. She'll bore you to death with the reminder. undecided

But my friends are the real deal! Piam! Conference call among the four of us. They will first of all laugh to their hearts delight before comforting you. In the process of making jest of you, you'll loosen up. They are the least of the evils (in a good way). But you see that laughter and jest, you can't escape it. One of us bought a problematic car (NISSAN PATHFINDER), we nicknamed him PATHFINDER and made jest of him until he sold the car. Even now, we still call him PATHFINDER to annoy him. cheesy cheesy
Honestly. I crave for such friends

My creator, pls give me quality friends that we would laugh, gist, share ideas, pains and joyous moments without crucifying each other ISEEEEEEEE
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by dequir: 5:02pm On Jun 16, 2025
GOD.

I confide only in GOD.
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by Difrent: 5:15pm On Jun 16, 2025
Chilipepper:
We all face tough moments in life times when we feel overwhelmed, confused, or just need someone to talk to. Among this list, who is that one person you feel safe confiding in when things get really hard?
All
But I'm this order
Nobody......when matter never too hard
Paddy/friends.......when water don dey pass garri
Wife........... When e don reach say I no dey fit buy food for house again, she will need an explanation
Parents........... Only when theres no other way
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by ManOfMan:
Chilipepper:
We all face tough moments in life times when we feel overwhelmed, confused, or just need someone to talk to. Among this list, who is that one person you feel safe confiding in when things get really hard?
God, through prayers - lots of it. I believe strongly in prayers and prayers have brought many answers to me. In fact as recently as 2 weeks ago I was healed of very bad peptic ulcer. That ulcer really disturbed me. It weakened me a lot. I couldn't do my work with full concentration. By the way I am a pharmacist. I took all the right medications but got only temporary reliefs. I decided to take it to God during the Healing School of 4th June 2025, God healed me instantly. I give the God of the Bible all the praise and thanks
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by AmishaCandra: 6:28pm On Jun 16, 2025
Nobody, though i have a lot of people to confide in but i rather swallow it up than dragging another person into my miserable moments.😑
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by Exousiang01(m): 6:29pm On Jun 16, 2025
nairalee:
this life is now per head. I keep to myself only.

This life has transformed from communal living to extended family living now to nuclear family setting.

Even bestfriend institution is dying.

This has made self reliance even greater. As I dey like this, I bottle up most of what I'm going through. It's not the best but its the reality on ground now.
I take my time to drive around and talk to myself.
Thank God for Bluetooth. People who see one man talking to himself and sometimes shouting would have thought I was mad. But I sure say many of them go think say i dey make call...

Sometimes i just para from my office dey go house, by the time i reach house i go done cool down...

But for me to discuss anything challenges with anybody, na lie ohhh..

Some times i am going through very terrible situations and friends come to me with complains, i wish say I fit just talk my own....

The only person that understands the situation is alcohol
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by femi4: 6:30pm On Jun 16, 2025
Chilipepper:
We all face tough moments in life times when we feel overwhelmed, confused, or just need someone to talk to. Among this list, who is that one person you feel safe confiding in when things get really hard?
Nobody

I weather the storm by myself
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by jonsn: 6:39pm On Jun 16, 2025
Chilipepper:
We all face tough moments in life times when we feel overwhelmed, confused, or just need someone to talk to. Among this list, who is that one person you feel safe confiding in when things get really hard?
A sign of maturity is understanding that the only person you can talk to is nobody but GOD.
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by chuksjuve(m): 6:40pm On Jun 16, 2025
Take to The LORD in prayer..

Everybody on that list is overwhelmed with their own problems too; why burden them with mine..

More so, they can only offer consoling words and in some cases even compound it..


LoooooL

😁
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by NewHe: 7:56pm On Jun 16, 2025
Kobojunkie:
A complete stranger you meet probably 10s of miles away from your home will turn out a kidnapper, ritualist or opportunist? undecided
Evans was a good stranger to most until he's exposed as kidnaper!
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by Cj4charles(m): 8:01pm On Jun 16, 2025
Lone survival...........................
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by stevups(m): 8:16pm On Jun 16, 2025
I have a friend like a brother. I always tell him, even what I wouldn't tell my wife
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by sync(f): 8:17pm On Jun 16, 2025
Currently, nobody as I am just by myself 😞
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by Baldwretch:
Confiding in others is an absolute sign of weakness.

I only confide in myself. I am my own confident. cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy

Myself? Confide in myself? I must be out of my mind!

Actually, confiding in one's self is a sign of weakness, too. shocked shocked shocked grin grin grin grin

Why confide in yourself - Just ignore your problems, overlook them, pretend all is well, strut about, turn a blind eye to all your challenges and difficulties and all will be well. grin grin grin grin grin

As Augustine used to say - Deliver me, O LORD, from that evil man, myself. grin grin grin grin grin
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by Abee79(m): 8:43pm On Jun 16, 2025
Mostly, I just confide in God. He's the only one that hasn't failed me 👍
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by Kobojunkie: 8:47pm On Jun 16, 2025
NewHe:
➜Evans was a good stranger to most until he's exposed as kidnaper!
I don't follow your line of reasoning at all. Yes, anyone you speak to, even your next-door neighbors, could be kidnappers or serial killers but what has that to do with this topic? Do you resolve not to even say, "Hi!," to your next-door neighbor because you assume him to be a kidnapper or serial killer? Your statement does not compute at all. Kindly help me understand. huh
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by Kobojunkie: 8:49pm On Jun 16, 2025
Baldwretch:
Confiding in others is an absolute sign of weakness. I only confide in myself. I am my own confident. cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy Myself? Confide in myself? I must be out of my mind! Actually, confiding in one's self is a sign of weakness, too. shocked shocked shocked grin grin grin grin Why confide in yourself? Just ignore your problems, overlook them, pretend all is well, strut about, turn a blind eye to all your challenges and difficulties and all will be well. grin grin grin grin grin As Augustine used to say - Deliver me, O LORD, from that evil man, myself. grin grin grin grin grin
That first statement is the primary reason why many men live and die lonely lives, all while surrounded by so-called friends and family. To live as if an island is to die miserably from within, a fool! angry
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by Mariangeles(f): 9:19pm On Jun 16, 2025
stevups:
I have a friend like a brother. I always tell him, even what I wouldn't tell my wife
Whatever you can't tell your spouse with whom you're most vulnerable, don't tell anyone.
Just saying.
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by Baldwretch: 9:19pm On Jun 16, 2025
Kobojunkie:
That first statement is the primary reason why many men live and die lonely lives, all while surrounded by so-called friends and family. To live as if an island is to die miserably from within, a fool! angry
Why would you argue that loneliness is bad, very bad, but having a company of confidants is good? Good for who? And why is one better than the other, and why is it always better than the other?

Are you actually arguing that riches is good for everyone? What of poverty? Is it bad for everyone? Is poverty bad in all situations? Is poverty bad for everyone in all situations? Are you going to argue that pleasure is good for everyone, and not pain? Is pain bad?

You just mentioned one of what should be termed "subjective opinion" in the variables of life! Having a company of well-wishers, friends, and acquaintances. These, and many more, are not the subject of objective takes. Loneliness is just as good, if not better, than that.

As a matter of fact, what you call "dying miserably" is just another subjective take, too. Your opinion cannot be used to form a consensus on what it is, or what it means to die well.

shocked shocked shocked shocked shocked

Please don't make me laugh. grin grin grin grin grin grin grin
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by Mariangeles(f): 9:23pm On Jun 16, 2025
Your dad is a Pastor or an Alfa?


ravensckar:
I confide in my friends any day any time twice on Monday.

They can relate and they can be less judgemental and together we can find a way forward.

But you see my parents (my dad especially), he can be very judgemental and be sure he will cast you later. Somebody that once helped me treat a stubborn gonorrhea lasan, all his public sermons for that week was about shunning adultery. He repeated the sermon to the extent that everyone knew something was up.

My mama own be sey after she don comfort you, she'll use that thing to be blackmailing you. You'll hear stuff like when you were sacked from work and you were penniless, shebi I was there for you. All your useless girlfriends ran away. If you don't give me what I asked for, I'll tell the whole world how I was there for you and how you didn't want to take care of me now that you've bounced back. I'll just be like; "O.K, I surrender". cheesy cheesy

As for my wife, she'll stay with you o, she'll comfort you but she'll be reminding you twice every day of how she stood by you. She won't blackmail you, but she'll never stop singing it to your ears how she's a good wife and your everything. She'll bore you to death with the reminder. undecided

But my friends are the real deal! Piam! Conference call among the four of us. They will first of all laugh to their hearts delight before comforting you. In the process of making jest of you, you'll loosen up. They are the least of the evils (in a good way). But you see that laughter and jest, you can't escape it. One of us bought a problematic car (NISSAN PATHFINDER), we nicknamed him PATHFINDER and made jest of him until he sold the car. Even now, we still call him PATHFINDER to annoy him. cheesy cheesy
Seun! Your 40 characters rule strikes again.
One cannot even ask a simple question in peace, without having to make it dramatic. 😩
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by Kobojunkie: 9:31pm On Jun 16, 2025
Baldwretch:
➜Why would you argue that loneliness is bad, very bad, but having a company of confidants is good?
➜Good for who? And why is one better than the other, and why is it always better than the other?
➜ Are you actually arguing that riches is good for everyone? What of poverty? Is it bad for everyone? Is poverty bad in all situations? Is poverty bad for everyone in all situations? Are you going to argue that pleasure is good for everyone, and not pain? Is pain bad?
➜ You just mentioned one of what should be termed "subjective opinion" in the variables of life! Having a company of well-wishers, friends, and acquaintances. These, and many more, are not the subject of objective takes. Loneliness is just as good, if not better, than that.
➜ As a matter of fact, what you call "dying miserably" is just another subjective take, too. Your opinion cannot be used to form a consensus on what it is, or what it means to die well. shocked shocked shocked shocked shocked Please don't make me laugh. grin grin grin grin grin grin grin
1. Where do you get that part in bold from any of my statements? Loneliness is a symptom of mental issues frequently observed among those who claim that confiding in others is a sign of weakness. undecided

2. Confiding in others does not necessitate surrounding yourself with the company of confidants. Even this chat we are having here — anonymously — can be a form of release for the human mind. At the end of the discourse, we both move on to other chats with other monikers, remaining anonymous — not confidants — after it all. undecided

3. You are digressing! undecided

4. Nothing of what I originally stated happens to be subjective. We are all humans, and humans are made of moods— emotions, signals that a lot of times point to the level of mental stress our minds are working with at any given moment. Accepting and working through those emotions sometimes involves letting out pent-up emotions, in a mature manner, of course can sometimes involve discussing the root stressors in our lives with others. Bottling it all up is never really recommended. undecided

5. Dying miserably is a subjective take on the possible consequence of bottling up one's frustrations/emotions? huh
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by Ouchbabe(f): 9:32pm On Jun 16, 2025
I keep things to myself and pray to God about it.
Then recently, chatGPT is my ever present friend. You need to see where we are chatting grin
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by ravensckar(m): 10:06pm On Jun 16, 2025
Mariangeles:
Your dad is a Pastor or an Alfa?
An Alfa. cheesy cheesy

Screaming wow wow wow wow like an ambulance is the way to go now. Anyhow anyhow, the 40 letters must complete. cheesy cheesy
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by Chief2410: 10:14pm On Jun 16, 2025
Baldwretch:
Why would you argue that loneliness is bad, very bad, but having a company of confidants is good? Good for who? And why is one better than the other, and why is it always better than the other?

Are you actually arguing that riches is good for everyone? What of poverty? Is it bad for everyone? Is poverty bad in all situations? Is poverty bad for everyone in all situations? Are you going to argue that pleasure is good for everyone, and not pain? Is pain bad?

You just mentioned one of what should be termed "subjective opinion" in the variables of life! Having a company of well-wishers, friends, and acquaintances. These, and many more, are not the subject of objective takes. Loneliness is just as good, if not better, than that.

As a matter of fact, what you call "dying miserably" is just another subjective take, too. Your opinion cannot be used to form a consensus on what it is, or what it means to die well.

shocked shocked shocked shocked shocked

Please don't make me laugh. grin grin grin grin grin grin grin
no mind that one.each individual is born alone and expected to die alone.The life na per head.being alone is addictive cos the peace that comes with it can not be found when in the midst of people.
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by Kobojunkie: 10:27pm On Jun 16, 2025
Chief2410:
➜no mind that one.each individual is born alone and expected to die alone.The life na per head.being alone is addictive cos the peace that comes with it can not be found when in the midst of people.
E be like say this "alone" nonsense don eat una ability to comprehend simple language. 🙄🙄🙄🙄

If you love being alone so much, why are you online chatting with people or bots? Why are you not curled up in a cave somewhere off the grid and the internet, where you won't get to interact with other human beings and bots? undecided

E never dawn on you since you dey online that being online chatting—even playing games—means you don't really crave this aloneness you speak of, but rather human interaction, or at least the AI-simulation of such? Awon elenu sisikobo! So much talking...no brain... huh
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by Baldwretch: 10:34pm On Jun 16, 2025
Kobojunkie:
Loneliness is a symptom of mental issues frequently observed among those who claim that confiding in others is a sign of weakness. undecided
Spoken by an erudite psychologist, Kobojunkie! The man who knows and has studied all there is to know about the human mind. Can you prove that anti-social humans are mentally ill? No, you can't. Do you have any idea how incredibly complex the human mind, faculties, and behaviour actually are? No, you don't. Have we figured and understood the human behavioural changes beyond what might be the product of a century-worth of research? Is man actually a monolith? Can he be figured out in an instant, or from a textbook? Could we understand all rational men's behaviour by isolating and studying a few of us? Are you one of the members of those who say that homosexuals are mentally ill? Are they actually mentally ill? Is deviant sexual behaviour a definitive proof of mental illness?



Kobojunkie:
2. Confiding in others does not necessitate surrounding yourself with the company of confidants. Even this chat we are having here — anonymously — can be a form of release for the human mind. At the end of the discourse, we both move on to other chats with other monikers, remaining anonymous — not confidants — after it all. undecided
The subject is on confiding on others, not on surrounding one's self with the confidants. I went farther to make a claim that - not only on others, confiding in one's self, too, is not ideal. I do not think I mentioned the latter. Clearly, you are deflecting.

I never said that confiding in others necessitates surrounding one's self with them. I never said that. What I was actually saying is - don't confide in others. Don't even confide in yourself. There is a difference.

However, even if i were to jump on your train of thoughts and air my view, I would still counter what you have just said, that, confiding in others does not necessitate surrounding one's self with the company of confidants.

No! Actually, confiding in others necessarily necessitates surrounding one's self with the company of the confidants. If not their persona, it's their words, if it's not their words, their opinion, ideas or thoughts. I still remember some men 9as if they were with me in person) more than thirteen years later because of what they said. How is that any different? People could say something to you in ten seconds and ten years later, you still remember them.

Kobojunkie:
3. You are digressing! undecided
No, I am not digressing. They are all part and parcel of the same problem: riches, poverty, loneliness, company, pleasure, pain, and many more. I am simply trying to bring other subjective takes to your attention. One is not much better than the other. It all depends.

Kobojunkie:
4. Nothing of what I originally stated happens to be subjective. We are all humans, and humans are made of moods— emotions, signals that a lot of times point to the level of mental stress our minds are working with at any given moment. Accepting and working through those emotions sometimes involves letting out pent-up emotions, in a mature manner, of course can sometimes involve discussing the root stressors in our lives with others. Bottling it all up is never really recommended. undecided

5. Dying miserably is a subjective take on the possible consequence of bottling up one's frustrations/emotions? huh
Man is hardly a solution to his own problem; how can he be the solution to someone else's problem? It's funny. Physician heal thyself.
Re: Out Of This List, Who Do You Confide In During Hard Times? by Chief2410: 10:42pm On Jun 16, 2025
Kobojunkie:
E be like say this "alone" nonsense don eat una ability to comprehend simple language. 🙄🙄🙄🙄

If you love being alone so much, why are you online chatting with people or bots? Why are you not curled up in a cave somewhere off the grid and the internet, where you won't get to interact with other human beings and bots? undecided

E never dawn on you since you dey online that being online chatting—even playing games—means you don't really crave this aloneness you speak of, but rather human interaction, or at least the AI-simulation of such? Awon elenu sisikobo! So much talking...no brain... huh
if I crave human connection,I go out and meet people. Expressing my view here doesn't mean I crave human connection. I have been on this platform for a long time now and it's recently I even started making comments. I use to come here read comments and learn from people without making comments. Talking about going off grid,I have plans for that in the future. When that happens,you won't even be seeing me here anymore. You crave human connection, that's you. Some other persons crave other things.
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