₦airaland Forum

Goo0dHardDick:
As a young man,

Look for a virgin and Marry, you're not wiser than God who looked for a virgin to birth his son

Getting married to a virgin as you said, is good, but: one good question to you is this: are you also a virgin?

Divaan:
Till date, I'll forever be grateful to God Almighty for my husband and the father of my kids. My husband is a perfect fit for me.
I thank God for bringing such a man my way. It could only have been God.

When I see the very wicked men, heartless ones, immatured ones, foolish ones, selfish ones, women haters, women shamers, abusers,etc that have infiltrated our world, I just keep thanking God. Guess I am among the few lucky ones cause I haven't faced marital challenges that is beyond me.

If you're single and wishing to be married to be the bone of your bone and flesh of your flesh. I'll advice you don't ridicule yourself with a list( I want a man or woman who is blah blah blah). Be the list. Build yourself to maturity. Strip yourself of every carnal desires and you'll get who/what you want.

I don't want to believe that people marry who they deserve 'cause He's a God of mercy.

Praise God for you and all who extol His Holy name.

naijapikin2:
See ehn... This thread is timely. I am married (for want of a better word).. the case of divorce between her and I, has been in court for close to a year. And it's expensive. I just cleared the last installment of payment 3 weeks ago, so we both will be free say by this month end. Wahala everywhere... To marry wahala... To divorce wahala.

I won't advice ant young man to do court wedding sam sam. Just do traditional after you must have impregnated her. As for us... Our wedding didn't produce any children.

I'll come here and celebrate, maybe do giveaway when the divorce is concluded.

Nothing like peace of mind o.
. wallahi

what about doing traditional and white wedding?? Without court wedding

mirrael68:
Praise God for you and all who extol His Holy name.

Thank you.






























































All thanks to God.

Justdogood:
I am tired of my marriage.
It's is barely 4 years.
My wife's family is just so entitled and over thinks things.
They say I am taking them as slaves in my house just cos the help their sister with house chores.

Please never marry from a very very not ok family (financially)
Their mentality is always different
They always reason so much unto everything.

the same thing am passing through. I married to a poor family.. they are expecting so much from me.. immediately after marriage I have to cut off from them. I don't pick inlaws calls.

dollytino4real:
Don't marry illiterate for the singles, whether man or woman pls run from them. They always feel cheated as if you are the cause of their illiteracy. My challenges are plenty ranging from children to husband but it is well.

How many illiterates have you married so far?

What are your illiterate spouses illiterates in?

Na moogoo men dey marry Nigerian women or should I say na moogoo men Nigerian women like to get married to.

Somebody should like my post so i can always come back to read the full message here

Kobojunkie:
This is a very funny advice to give in this day and time.😂😂😂😂😂

Kobojunkie, they said singles should observe and learn but you must always show yourself

naijapikin2:
Man... The payment was for court process... Lawyers appearance fee. Filing with the court bailiff... Omo. Once you appear in court to start a divorce process, they rush you knowing that they must... I repeat.. must chop your money.

The first time I went to court to make enquires, one lady lawyer asked me to make a down payment of 350k... That's for a start o...

I'm not yet a wealthy guy o... So to cough out that amount was not easy.


All in all I paid about 400k.


I will sha pop champagne when it's over.

NB... Also part of the money went to serving her the court papers. And the transport to her place of work since we no longer stay together... And calls by lawyer and court officials who aso carry out investigation.

It's well o

This is so pathetic, i wish I could hear the story of how you guys drifted apart

PwincessRukky:
Emotional abuse, silent treatment and lack of communication were what I faced. I sought a divorce, and I got it.

Were you denying him sex?
Sometimes silent treatment stems from denying your man sex. A man begging the wife for sex all the time is a NO NO. In reaction, they go into their shell which culminates to the silent treatment.

Don't always wait for the man to ask for sex, sometimes as a woman, instigate it. It helps the man feel loved too.

naijapikin2:
See ehn... This thread is timely. I am married (for want of a better word).. the case of divorce between her and I, has been in court for close to a year. And it's expensive. I just cleared the last installment of payment 3 weeks ago, so we both will be free say by this month end. Wahala everywhere... To marry wahala... To divorce wahala.

I won't advice ant young man to do court wedding sam sam. Just do traditional after you must have impregnated her. As for us... Our wedding didn't produce any children.

I'll come here and celebrate, maybe do giveaway when the divorce is concluded.

Nothing like peace of mind o.
. wallahi

This is very serious. Does she also want the divorce?
Are you willing to give marriage a second chance?

lendahand:
imagine 34 year old lady I want to marry is insisting on court wedding, trad and white wedding before she will allow me have sex with her, can you imagine? Me I like her and she is a virgin but her conditions can't be met by me.

^^^
It means she has standards. That's the way it was done in the old days and there's a reason for that.

Virginity on its own doesn't necessarily guarantee marital success but it does say something about a person's (note that I didn't say woman) discipline, character, morals etc.

naijapikin2:
Man... The payment was for court process... Lawyers appearance fee. Filing with the court bailiff... Omo. Once you appear in court to start a divorce process, they rush you knowing that they must... I repeat.. must chop your money.

The first time I went to court to make enquires, one lady lawyer asked me to make a down payment of 350k... That's for a start o...

I'm not yet a wealthy guy o... So to cough out that amount was not easy.


All in all I paid about 400k.


I will sha pop champagne when it's over.

NB... Also part of the money went to serving her the court papers. And the transport to her place of work since we no longer stay together... And calls by lawyer and court officials who aso carry out investigation.

It's well o

As a single guy... Can u please highlight what led to the divorce that can't be fixed

goodmuscopi:
Na you dey chase curves and vibes. Next time leave the age out and check emotional stability

You're mistaken. Stay on the topic.,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

I’m single and have never been married. But from my professional experience, have lost count of matrimonial mishaps that would have been easily resolved if both parties had proper orientation about rights over property in marriage and child custody.

You see those two topics, if you have not married, find out more about them and if you are - call your partner and get quality education about it together. The knowledge will shape your character in marriage going forward.

People don’t fear what they don’t understand. A spouse that’s intentionally causing problem in their marriage would exercise caution if they know what’s at stake if the marriage should break down.

A family torn apart can never be whole for the children of the marriage, which is the ultimate purpose of the marriage institution in the first place.

goodmuscopi:
Pls note, this thread is a floor for married, divorced or separated folks to discuss and share insight from experience. Single should just observe and learn

Now, what are the challenges you faced/are facing in your marriage?

What step did you take wrongly?

Irrespective of wrong steps, both partner should be forgiving

Marriage isn't about being right all the time...infact you can't be correct at all times cos both of you were shaped up with two different family principles.

To continue to make it work, both parties should be forgiving

lendahand:
imagine 34 year old lady I want to marry is insisting on court wedding, trad and white wedding before she will allow me have sex with her, can you imagine? Me I like her and she is a virgin but her conditions can't be met by me.

Don't fall for that bullshit of marriage before sex.
Her real attitude can only show up after sex; and at that point you can take your marriage decision. Please don't be manipulated. I am not even 100% sure she is a virgin

goodmuscopi:
Be careful what you wish for. Sometimes we desire a life that brings problem to us

Wishing to have a little more money I would say is not bad. He who wears the shoe knows where it pinches.

Manculated:


I do not mean to make jest of you.

The way life is structured is very complex.

I wouldn't agree with your statement "Marriage Na Scam" as the standard for everyone. I would only agree if it's that's your perception and what you experienced which is your personal opinion.

There are men up there whom their perception and experiences with regards to marriage contradict yours. They are enjoying their marriages. Wether they are being sincere about their statements or not is really not of my concern.

What i have come to realize about life is, Most men aren't taught the "Important Things" they really need to know about LIFE!

In LIFE, You must do your personal Due Dilligence in whatever you want to indulge in because there are Consequences (Good or Bad) for every action and decision taken!

due deligence my brother.hasty decisions has destroyed my life.i no Dey hear word.

Omo, I just dey my bed dey read comment dey Laff. My advice to all men, stand your ground when u are at the right track or when you feel u shouldn't be compelled to do societal wishes. I have been able to soak pressures from society on getting married, avoided my mum, aunties and uncles like mad and don't waste time trying to win a hard to get lady's life.

lendahand:
yea people do change but most times the red flag is there but ignored by us in the heat of the moment. That is why you should marry a god-fearing babe.

I no no Weda my woman Dey fear God abi na God Dey fear her.na dilemma ur guy Dey Sony kids small if not I for don take strong decision.

lendahand:
I talk am say you are passing thru a lot and it's reflecting totally in your outlook on life. Not every marriage will be ill-fated like yours sir.

My condolences though.

condolence?na person die.e nevrr reach like that bro.i am fine o.one of the most successful amongst my pears.Wetin dem take Dey rate man na Weda e fit make money and I have tons of it. Have kids so no issue bros.

lendahand:
she was right. I have been there. Bible said you should not be unequally yoked. An illiterate willing to learn is different but most are not willing and will pose a great risk.

my brother)sister, that's the point, there never willing to learn. They feel cheated and lack understand. They always feel exploited at all times . Illiteracy is blindness.

lendahand:
oga highchief, you have a disturbingly negative outlook on holy matrimony. This is obvious right now.

bros u don marry?E get why I Dey ask cos who no go no know.we no get good women again o bro

highchief1:
due deligence my brother.hasty decisions has destroyed my life.i no Dey hear word.

Hasty decisions how?
I am sure we conversed less than 2 mths ago.
Please how did your wife go from being one of the few women we should learn from to what you are describing on this thread?

chidi2003:
Getting married to a virgin as you said, is good, but: one good question to you is this: are you also a virgin?

The word virgin isn't used for a man. If a man is going to provide for a woman for the rest of her life then it should be for a woman who hasn't been eaten by other men before. Besides it is stupidity to pay for something other men had for free, they call it bride price

njokuuche77:
Before You Say “I Do” please open your ears, mouth and nose and listen to this piece on the Dos and Don’ts of Marriage

My brothers and sisters, let me tell you something very important marriage is not a joke. It’s not all about romance and affection every day. It’s not an Instagram highlight reel. It will test your patience, your finances, your peace of mind, and even your mental health if you don’t choose the right partner.
This is my 6th year in Marriage to the Glory of God.
The best part is I met my wife here on this platform.
You see all those proposals and weddings we see online? They’re beautiful to watch. But the real challenge begins after the wedding day. Let me break it down for you like someone who has experienced it firsthand.

Do Marry for Shared Values, Not Just Feelings
Emotions fade, values are sustainable. Marry someone who aligns with your core beliefs, faith, family, finance, lifestyle, and even how you handle conflict.

Do Observe beyond sweet talk
Watch how they behave when angry, under pressure, or when they don’t get their way. That’s their real self, not the one they show you during dinner dates.

Do ask the hard questions
What are your views on money? Children? Religion? Family involvement? Gender roles? Mental health? Don't avoid these conversations please, they are the foundation.

Do watch how they treat others
The way your partner treats domestic staff, waiters, or even their own parents says a lot. Kindness must go beyond you.

Please have a life before you venture into marriage
Be emotionally, spiritually, and financially stable, or at least on your way there. Marriage is not an escape route. It exposes rather than solves problems.

Please Do insist on mutual respect
Respect is the oxygen of a healthy marriage. Once it’s gone, love begins to choke. Both partners must feel heard, valued, and safe please.

Please Do involve trusted mentors or counsellors. You can also reach out to me
Go for premarital counselling. Not just church-based, but real, honest conversations with someone who can ask the tough questions without bias.

Now let's look at some of the DON'TS
Please never you marry out of pity, pressure or pregnancy
None of these are solid foundations for a lifelong journey. Love and purpose should lead, not panic or manipulation.

Please and Please, don't assume you can change your partner
Marriage doesn’t transform people; it magnifies who they already are. If you can’t accept them as they are today, don’t marry hoping they’ll evolve tomorrow. You will regret.

b]Please don't underestimate family influence[/b]
their family is toxic and they don’t know how to set boundaries, brace yourself—you might not just be marrying them but their entire household

b]Please don't go silence on finance[/b]
Talk about debts, spending habits, income, and responsibilities. Secrets around money are slow poisons in many marriages.

b]Please don't marry someone who can't apologize or forgive[/b]
Offences will come. A partner who lacks humility to say “I’m sorry” or the maturity to forgive will become a source of pain, not peace.

b]don't prioritize what people will say over your peace[/b]
Too many people stay stuck in toxic marriages because of shame or society. Remember, it’s your life, not theirs. Know when to walk away. It's a time bomb to stay in a toxic marriage. One-day it will explode.

Finally Make una no rush enter marriage oooo. Wedding na one day, marriage na lifetime. If you go enter, shine your eyes, not wetin society dey shout. Delay no be denial. No use ring take enter prison.
Its better to remain single than say “God, why me?” every night after marriage.
Shine your eye o. Love no dey blind. Na people dey close eye enter fire.
it's better to wait long than to marry wrong

This write up is a "gem"!
.. couldn't be better.

VeryWickedMan:
My marriages are sweet and trouble-free because I'm the one who starts the problem. Before any of my wives can think of how to frustrate me I quickly drop one big family issue on them. It can be impregnating a church member or neighbour's daughter. It could be slapping a relative.

These keep them occupied for the time being.
No quarrels, no fights, no nagging.


Keep your woman occupied with wahala to experience joyful peace in your home.

Seun
Seun
Seun
Seun
Seun
Seuseun

njokuuche77:
Before You Say “I Do” please open your ears, mouth and nose and listen to this piece on the Dos and Don’ts of Marriage

My brothers and sisters, let me tell you something very important marriage is not a joke. It’s not all about romance and affection every day. It’s not an Instagram highlight reel. It will test your patience, your finances, your peace of mind, and even your mental health if you don’t choose the right partner.
This is my 6th year in Marriage to the Glory of God.
The best part is I met my wife here on this platform.
You see all those proposals and weddings we see online? They’re beautiful to watch. But the real challenge begins after the wedding day. Let me break it down for you like someone who has experienced it firsthand.

Do Marry for Shared Values, Not Just Feelings
Emotions fade, values are sustainable. Marry someone who aligns with your core beliefs, faith, family, finance, lifestyle, and even how you handle conflict.

Do Observe beyond sweet talk
Watch how they behave when angry, under pressure, or when they don’t get their way. That’s their real self, not the one they show you during dinner dates.

Do ask the hard questions
What are your views on money? Children? Religion? Family involvement? Gender roles? Mental health? Don't avoid these conversations please, they are the foundation.

Do watch how they treat others
The way your partner treats domestic staff, waiters, or even their own parents says a lot. Kindness must go beyond you.

Please have a life before you venture into marriage
Be emotionally, spiritually, and financially stable, or at least on your way there. Marriage is not an escape route. It exposes rather than solves problems.

Please Do insist on mutual respect
Respect is the oxygen of a healthy marriage. Once it’s gone, love begins to choke. Both partners must feel heard, valued, and safe please.

Please Do involve trusted mentors or counsellors. You can also reach out to me
Go for premarital counselling. Not just church-based, but real, honest conversations with someone who can ask the tough questions without bias.

Now let's look at some of the DON'TS
Please never you marry out of pity, pressure or pregnancy
None of these are solid foundations for a lifelong journey. Love and purpose should lead, not panic or manipulation.

Please and Please, don't assume you can change your partner
Marriage doesn’t transform people; it magnifies who they already are. If you can’t accept them as they are today, don’t marry hoping they’ll evolve tomorrow. You will regret.

Please don't underestimate family influence
If their family is toxic and they don’t know how to set boundaries, brace yourself—you might not just be marrying them but their entire household

Please don't go silence on finance
Talk about debts, spending habits, income, and responsibilities. Secrets around money are slow poisons in many marriages.

Please don't marry someone who can't apologize or forgive
Offences will come. A partner who lacks humility to say “I’m sorry” or the maturity to forgive will become a source of pain, not peace.

don't prioritize what people will say over your peace
Too many people stay stuck in toxic marriages because of shame or society. Remember, it’s your life, not theirs. Know when to walk away. It's a time bomb to stay in a toxic marriage. One-day it will explode.

Finally Make una no rush enter marriage oooo. Wedding na one day, marriage na lifetime. If you go enter, shine your eyes, not wetin society dey shout. Delay no be denial. No use ring take enter prison.
Its better to remain single than say “God, why me?” every night after marriage.
Shine your eye o. Love no dey blind. Na people dey close eye enter fire.
it's better to wait long than to marry wrong

Words on Marble!

Seun
Seun
Seun
Seun
Seun
Seun