₦airaland Forum

Depends on the size of the table

This one na question?

Merry100:
Women don’t just bring something to the table; many times, they are the table.

They bring emotional intelligence, resilience, vision, and daily sacrifices that keep families and society going.

What sacrifices are you talking about?
A man will sacrifice his happiness for his family while a woman will sacrifice her family for her happiness.

In all honesty, I wouldn't down play what women brings to the table, both brings something to the table..

Most especially if you are married, I know what my wife goes through everyday to keep my kids, is not a day job, sometimes I watch how she run up and down and catch that girl, before she closes her eyes again, the boy don dey do him own...

She can sweep more than 5times in a day..

Merry100:
In my opinion, Nigerian women bring more to the table

Nigerian women brings nothing. They see it as a gateway out of poverty

At the inception of the relationship, the man brings more to the table. When the relationship turns to a family especially with children, the woman brings more to the table.

Merry100:
While men are often praised for income, women quietly carry both the home and the hustle. And still, they’re expected to submit, even when they’re the ones holding everything together.

@bolded:

A submissive wife actually controls the husband.

Submission in marital context is not slavery, or behaving like a Tesla robot.

wizod:
As far as my own family is concerned, I bring 95% of what is needed on the table while my wife brings 5% and whatever that is 5% does not exist.

Lolz, Lolz, Lolz, Lolz 🤣🤣🤣😂.

Merry100:
While men are often praised for income, women quietly carry both the home and the hustle. And still, they’re expected to submit, even when they’re the ones holding everything together.

Your submission/illusion is on just about 5% of women right?

The question was not properly coined or presented, it would be uncharitable to say a particular gender bring more to the table, the 'more" all to be defined, in finance, domestic work, family balance/marriage survival, wisdom child mentoring and formations and a host of other variables. In finance men rule the world in most families while the women have 1st. Class in home front and children formation. Buy in another angle if you critically look at it from the point of The man married the women, it means that the man brought the woman to the table along with what ever the woman brought to the table, but if na woman married the man otilor

bukatyne:
Marriage was designed for the benefit of men.

According to the Bible, God said it is not good for a man to be alone & created a woman. So naturally, women bring more to the 'table' ( to mirror the OP).

The ask is that men bring something commensurate; 40% will do.

Wrong! Marriage is DEFINITELY designed for women BUT they also bring more to the table (as it ought be because marriage is for them!)

columbus007:
Lolz, Lolz, Lolz, Lolz 🤣🤣🤣😂.

Abi no be so?

The "Table" in Question

Are we talking about:

Relationships (romantic or marital)?

Business or career?

Family or social structure?

Community or leadership?


Each context has different expectations, strengths, and needs.

Merry100:
In my opinion, Nigerian women bring more to the table

Who brings more to the table — a man or a woman? It depends on the individual, not the gender. Value is based on character, mindset, skills, and what each person contributes in a given context (relationship, business, family, etc.). The real focus should be on complementary strengths, not competition. Gender alone doesn’t determine value — actions do.

bukatyne:
Marriage was designed for the benefit of men.

According to the Bible, God said it is not good for a man to be alone & created a woman. So naturally, women bring more to the 'table' ( to mirror the OP).

The ask is that men bring something commensurate; 40% will do.

If Marriage was designed to benefit Men ... why are the wives mostly next of kin

if Marriage was designed to benefit Men .... why is the wedding day regarded as the Bride joyful day

If Marriage was design to benefit Men... why does it impede polygamy

if Marriage was design to Benefit Men ... why are mothers the main recipient of children benefits at old age

if Marriage was design to benefit Men ... why are the Men expected to sacrifice the most nd die for the family

Merry100:
Women don’t just bring something to the table; many times, they are the table.

They bring emotional intelligence, resilience, vision, and daily sacrifices that keep families and society going.

emotional intelligence and yet women still select the wrongest of men..nonsns

That's a bold claim — that marriage was designed primarily for the benefit of men, and therefore women bring more to the table — but it doesn’t hold up fully under historical, biological, and social scrutiny. Biblical Interpretation Is Often Misused

Yes, Genesis 2:18 says “It is not good for man to be alone; I will make a helper suitable for him.”
But that "helper" (Hebrew: ezer kenegdo) is not a sidekick — it’s a powerful term used to describe God Himself in other scriptures (e.g., Psalm 33:20).

So the woman was not created as less than, but as a complementary equal — not proof that she brings "more" or that marriage is for men’s exclusive benefit. The Bible doesn't suggest women are superior in value — but equal partners.

Historically, marriage benefited both genders, often protecting women.

Modern data shows men may gain more in health and stability, while women often carry more emotional and mental load — which is why they leave more often.

Marriage is not about who brings more, but how both partners contribute fully and fairly.

bukatyne:
Marriage was designed for the benefit of men.

According to the Bible, God said it is not good for a man to be alone & created a woman. So naturally, women bring more to the 'table' ( to mirror the OP).

The ask is that men bring something commensurate; 40% will do.

Merry100:
In my opinion, Nigerian women bring more to the table

. A lot of married Nigerian women are wife-appliances. According to stats, over 30% of married women in Nigeria occupy both the role of breadwinner and wife-appliance in their marriages.

theredaddy:
➜ If Marriage was designed to benefit Men ... why are the wives mostly next of kin
➜ if Marriage was designed to benefit Men .... why is the wedding day regarded as the Bride joyful day
➜ If Marriage was design to benefit Men... why does it impede polygamy
➜ if Marriage was design to Benefit Men ... why are mothers the main recipient of children benefits at old age
➜ if Marriage was design to benefit Men ... why are the Men expected to sacrifice the most nd die for the family

1. In Nigeria, there is no statistic out there that claims wives are mostly next of kin.

2. They are regarded as the bride's joyful day— idiomatic expression— DOES NOT mean the bride is fact in happy on that day.

3. Impede polygamy in what sense? 😏

4. There is no evidence that mothers are the main recipients of children's benefits in old age. Rather, there is instead evidence that the parent most involved with the children benefits the most in old age. It is not a consequence of marriage but rather of emotional investment made during the developmental years of the children.

5. The sacrifice most men make is instead to secure them the benefit of claiming the title of head of household in the marriage. It has little or nothing to do with anything else, really.

Let's stop perpetuating falsehoods regarding the place and benefits of marriage, shall we?

Merry100:
While men are often praised for income, women quietly carry both the home and the hustle. And still, they’re expected to submit, even when they’re the ones holding everything together.

Yea you are right, women bring a lot of underrated things to the family. From bearing children, raising Godly children, organise the home, take care of the kitchen, brings emotions, brings stability without which a home can't exist.

Most men know this, but they are just too arrogant and proud to admit it.

Yes, a woman can raise children alone, provide and still be a mother, I doubt if a man can raise children alone.

tunjijones:
➜Yea you are right, women bring a lot of underrated things to the family. From bearing children, raising Godly children, organise the home, take care of the kitchen, brings emotions, brings stability without which a home can't exist.
Most men know this, but they are just too arrogant and proud to admit it.
➜ Yes, a woman can raise children alone, provide and still be a mother, I doubt if a man can raise children alone.

The average Nigerian woman occupies the role of
➜ Baby mama
➜ Nanny
➜ Housekeeper & Governess
➜ Cook/Chef
➜ Emotion dumpster/Counselor
➜Sex partner
➜Personal Assistant...
....in marriage. When you consider each and every role individually, you find that the average man out there can't even afford to pay for those on his salary as a Nigerian. However, these are contract roles played by women in marriage, and most of them for free. A life of suffering masked as an achievement and "glory" for the religious among them.

2. Those who also carry on their backs the role of provider in marriage leave me dumbstruck every single time. I can never understand what drives these women to such lengths .... suffering?

A responsible man and a responsible woman brings more to the table, any woman that actually love her husband and want both of them to grow very old together will always help the man so that the load won't be too much on him, men are dying in silence dey don't even think of themselves, their health is going down just because they want the best for their family, women stand up and assist us, is not easy.

kevwemike:
➜A responsible man and a responsible woman brings more to the table, any woman that actually love her husband and want both of them to grow very old together will always help the man so that the load won't be too much on him, men are dying in silence dey don't even think of themselves, their health is going down just because they want the best for their family, women stand up and assist us, is not easy.

That turns out not to be the fault of the women in the marriage but the men!

Una no Dey tire for this Una table question?

Who construct the table in the first place sef?

Nawa o

Literally men, figuratively women.

They're fighting the guy that said its women; make I laugh first Hahahahahahah and i will tell you the truth, na women.

Merry100:
In my opinion, Nigerian women bring more to the table

Lol. No where in the world does female gender brings more to the table than men. Not even in the developed economy where they are trying much to raise status and earning capacity and ability of women to level up to that of male gender.
Go out there and ask random 100 men and 100 women questions about their annual income. Without income to support the family, no family can stand

Zonefree:
What do they bring to the table?

Their life, blood in order to bring forth your own blood

authority2006:
➜Lol. No where in the world does female gender brings more to the table than men. Not even in the developed economy where they are trying much to raise status and earning capacity and ability of women to level up to that of male gender.
Go out there and ask random 100 men and 100 women questions about their annual income. Without income to support the family, no family can stand

. That is instead a myth and not a fact. It has been shown time and time again that the average woman tends to bring so much more to the table than the average man does. What is happening in places like Japan and South Korea — with many women rejecting marriage and childbirth altogether — more than proves that the men never did bring the most to the table in many cases.

Karlifate:
@bolded:

A submissive wife actually controls the husband.

Submission in marital context is not slavery, or behaving like a Tesla robot.

Your idea is nice but you just kind of explained respect, not submission. Respect is the better word.

Of course, I'm a submissive woman. God forbid I have an abusive husband; I'll definitely stay and submit to him.

Of course, I'm a submissive woman. Even when my husband beats me, I'll call him "lord and personal Saviour." As per he was the one that created the rib God used to form woman.

Go check the dictionary for the real meaning of submission, try applying it to real-life scenarios, and you'll see how deadly it becomes; especially with the average Nigerian man walking around with an ego-fed, enslavement mentality.

Where is Osinachi today?

If submission wasn't life-threatening, I won't even see it as an issue. If men were like Abraham in character, maybe submission would make sense. But that's not what we have. What we have are controlling, entitled, emotionally stunted men shouting "submit!"

Respect has sense.
Respect knows when to walk away.
When you respect someone, you hold them in high esteem but that doesn't mean you allow them to kill you or manipulate you to destruction. Submission waits. Submission get destroyed. Submission dies.

My personal findings:
All Scripture is inspired by God; doesn't mean every word was directly spoken by God. Some parts reflect human interpretations, cultural expectations, and personal biases. Remember Apostle Peter's wrong stance on circumcision? It took Paul to correct him. So yes, in my opinion, some of Paul's views on marriage and submission are outdated and cannot be blindly applied to today's abusive realities.

Those teachings should not even be applicable in our era; they were given in a time and culture where abuse wasn't even acknowledged. How many cases of domestic violence were recorded in the Bible? How controlling were the men of that era?

Let's not downplay slavery or use Scripture to validate it. Submission, in the wrong hands, becomes a death sentence.

Whatever a woman brings to the table can be paid for and be replaced. Can't say the same for a man.