₦airaland Forum

Kobojunkie:
Again, OP tested her ability to give and receive affection and gave her his approval.

All of which she promptly withdrew once she got what she wanted - a ring and a baby. Your point?

SKhanmi:
Lol. You're in soup and you're just seeing the warning signs.

Hint, it will get worse

Just so you know, some heavily pregnant women still drag their husbands for sx, in fact it's recommend by nursing matrons if you're familiar with their checkups.

And it definitely seems both of you have low libido or one is frigid.

The woman is planning to do CS cesarean section with her no sex rules.

leave that woman alone...

She feels very weird right now...

Just leave her alone

Ozzyk:
We got married in ending of August
We didn't have anything to do together at all during our 2 year courtship
She's really adorable and a Godly babe to the core
On the second night of our wedding I confirmed she was a virgin
Sadly our honeymoon only lasted Barely 2 weeks before she missed her period
Here is the issue;
Since over a month and some few weeks now she won't let me touch her, in fact it's like my touches irritate her, no sex, no kiss, no smooching, no touching
It sometimes feels we're just house mates who shares same matrimonial bed together
I have tried to talk to her many times about my sexual wellness but she seems not interested at all
My marriage is less than 2 months and I am already over a month sex starved
Perhaps she sometimes complains of pregnancy cramps but this should not com at the detriment of my sexual well being.....
And besides she's goes to work everyday but the moments she gets home she won't let me touch not even slight touches not to talk of sex or romance....
I am already tired 😩

For the first pregnancy, you are supposed to give her at least three months after she takes in before things can normalize with her. So endure a little. It's not easy but it will be better with time. She'll be the one asking for it later because her body will demand it and she needs it for smooth delivery too.

Dear brother i can really understand how frustrating and confusing that must feel for you. It sounds like you truly care about her and value the bond you both share, but you’re also feeling neglected emotionally and physically. Pregnancy especially in the early stages can affect a woman’s hormones, energy, and mood in ways that are sometimes hard to predict. That said, your feelings and needs are valid too. It might help to approach her with empathy, letting her know you’re not just seeking sex, but closeness and connection.
Hang in there this stage may be tough, but with understanding and communication, it can get better.❤️‍🩹

TWoods:
➜All of which she promptly withdrew once she got what she wanted - a ring and a baby. Your point?

I continue not to see your point since OP never hinted at his wife completely withdrawing sex and affection from him after a ring and a baby. How you even arrived at those being what she wanted.... I fail to see in any of what OP posted so far about his woman.

Diamond098454:
But you have been sleeping with her throughout your courtship a month of no sex won't kill you

Why una no de ever read wetin them write? Is there a price for rushing to comment?

Op, know this and know peace. Some women are sexually 'impotent' too just like some men. unfortunately, you ended up with one of such women. She will still not have sex with you even after given birth. She will see it a burden and a huge favour to you, and sacrifice on her part. Even if she manages to come around, she still starve you any time you guys have the slightest issue at home. If sex was in the front burner of your consideration when marrying her, then I am sorry to disappoint you.

It is easy to talk when you are not the victim of the scenario
And for the record she doesn't vomit, no spitting, no fever, no fatigue no nausea
She has a very very mild symptoms
Which has not prevented her from doing what she was doing before she took in and day to day activities

abbey621:
Guy your head no correct o! First time pregnancy from someone that has not done adequate knacking and newly wed, of course she's not prepared for the rollercoaster she's on! Instead of you to be a supportive partner and forsake your own needs for awhile, you're already fuming and foaming in just a month, sho gbadun?

Do you understand all the hormones, bloating, spitting, nausea and other things going on? Better give yourself brain and reassure her that everything will be okay. If you must know, some women even the smell of your body can cause them to vomit, DON'T BE SELFISH!

Mariangeles:
You don carry your private sensitive matter enter nairaland, abi?
If you like, let them make you begin doubt your new wife, and destroy your home, you hear?

As for your wife, I believe her body is going through a phase/process she's not familiar with, and everything is happening so fast -- between the time she had her first sex, and conceiving.
Just try to be patient with her, and keep helping her in any way you can, to make her feel comfortable.
Hopefully, by the 2nd-3rd trimester, things will change for the better.
You might not have to wait until after she gives birth.

On point bro. All these inexperienced dude.my advice, try as much as possible to handle her like fragile thing at this time,in no distance time she will be ready for you.Never you go out searching for sex elsewhere, except you want to destroy your marriage. Why do you want to put yourself and your family in jeopardy because of few minutes sexual so call enjoyment. You're immature!

Ozzyk:
I'm on 6 weeks leave immediately after our wedding
She resumes work the 3rd week after our wedding
Whenever she goes to work I do the cooking, and cleaning and other basic home duties before she comes back from work.
By the time she comes back she'd just eat press phone and sleep
But still all these doesn't yield anything positive
I stopped doing the home works since it yields nothing

Kai, I know the first few months of marriage is the hardest, but this una own no follow. Some women don't know it's their attitude towards sex that push their faithful husbands to cheat.

And how frequent is a frequent sex??
I'm not even demanding for too much
I'm newly married
We never reach two months but I'm already starving for 5 weeks....
In a marriage that's fresh like ShopRite bread

InvertedHammer:
/
Who deceived you that frequent sex is a benefit in marriage?

Get all the sex you can while single and dating.
/

I'm not stupid, I won't be saying this if she had pesterd me to wait....
She had retracted from all sorts of intimacy
No touch, no kissing no smooching no deep communication
When I bring issue of sex up she'll tell me she might not be ready until after 9 months

Desusi:
On point bro. All these inexperienced dude.my advice, try as much as possible to handle her like fragile thing at this time,in no distance time she will be ready for you.Never you go out searching for sex elsewhere, except you want to destroy your marriage. Why do you want to put yourself and your family in jeopardy because of few minutes sexual so call enjoyment. You're immature!

Ozzyk:
I'm not stupid, I won't be saying this if she had pesterd me to wait....
She had retracted from all sorts of intimacy
No touch, no kissing no smooching no deep communication
When I bring issue of sex up she'll tell me she might not be ready until after 9 months

Chaiii… that woman no send you o!
You need to give her an ultimatum else she’ll think you’re cool with it.

Ozzyk:
It is easy to talk when you are not the victim of the scenario
And for the record she doesn't vomit, no spitting, no fever, no fatigue no nausea
She has a very very mild symptoms
Which has not prevented her from doing what she was doing before she took in and day to day activities

BULLSHIT.....You've obviously not been paying attention, you're still behaving like a child, pay more attention to her and you'll start to notice some things. Take it from me, a soon to be father of THREE!

Are you sure her attitude isn't manipulation in disguise? Women are naturally horn_y. I was flexing my wife even up to a night before her delivery

Kobojunkie:
I continue not to see your point since OP never hinted at his wife completely withdrawing sex and affection from him after a ring and a baby. How you even arrived at those being what she wanted.... I fail to see in any of what OP posted so far about his woman.

You're perpetually arguing with everyone, so I'm going to bow out. You have the floor.

VOsimhen144:
na why I support polygamous marriage to an extent… as this op wife dey give am unnecessary attitude you go Jst switch enter the second wife kpekus.

OP, sit her down and talk to her, know what the issue is, if she no give u concrete reason and she no adjust, no jst dey stress urself, kpekus full everywhere, as low as 10k you go knack better kpekus.
U go run am codedly, no let ur wife know.
Life no hard abeg..

You're a bad influence.
Ya advise won't be taken. Am the wife's bestie.

From your writeup you don't sound experienced in matters of women. Just because you find it difficult to enter and she bleed does not prove that she is a virgin. There are things that can make a sx worker do all these things. Meet these that sell kayan mata stuff and they can explain to you. It's looks like don't love u that much. Don't underestimate the power of love. The problem might even be spiritual.

Be patient with her bro. It do happen. With time, she will ask you for sex to relieve you from the urge. Just have patience with her. Some ladies are like that.

The earlier you know women are selfish the better for you. Just remove your mind from sex for now and try to be good if not, you fit de cry ooo because she no send you.
If she was in your shoes, you won't have the guts to deny her hence, i keep saying, women are more heartless than men.
Welcome to onboard.

Bro what shes doing is perfectly normal. During the first trimester some women experience arpathy to food, sex , etc and crave other things. u need to gove her time n control urself after 3 months of that pregnancy she her body may welcome back those things again though some women do not till they give birth. This is when u need to be patient with her n help her. Life of a married man does not begin and end with sex. Sometimes u become patient. even though she needs sex now for her baby to sail out easily. u still need to let ger adapt to the changes she is going through especially as a newbie. The first 3 months us usually the most dangerous. [color=#000099][/color]

Kobojunkie:
You people are just wicked. You wrap your lies around that book every chance you get all so you could humiliate and demonize women every chance you get.

How about you sit down and humbly ask to be schooled in the content of 'that book'? Of course you're not interested. So who is peddling a lie here? Yeah, you got that right—you are! You're welcome .

Mariangeles:
You don carry your private sensitive matter enter nairaland, abi?
If you like, let them make you begin doubt your new wife, and destroy your home, you hear?

As for your wife, I believe her body is going through a phase/process she's not familiar with, and everything is happening so fast -- between the time she had her first sex, and conceiving.
Just try to be patient with her, and keep helping her in any way you can, to make her feel comfortable.
Hopefully, by the 2nd-3rd trimester, things will change for the better.
You might not have to wait until after she gives birth.

He should wait four to seven months to have sex with his wife when she's not sick or something? Lol. These are the wicked people Kobojunkie was trying to call out before they mistakenly misfired.

omotolly22:
Just be patient and give her the benefit of this first trimester which is 3 month

By the second trimester, you guys should be able to have regular sex back

Talking from experience, first trimester is usually the risky part of pregnancy, cramps ,morning sickness, risk of miscarriage etc

But by second trimester, she should be able to comply to your demand, except she is hiding something

Listen to this

emmyN:
✓ How about you sit down and humbly ask to be schooled in the content of 'that book'? Of course you're not interested. So who is peddling a lie here? Yeah, you got that right—you are! You're welcome .

Religion ans wickedness to women, children, and humanity in general... Na certified thing! 🥱🥱🥱

Kobojunkie:
Religion ans wickedness to women, children, and humanity in general... Na certified thing! 🥱🥱🥱

Thankfully, we're both against religion.

Ozzyk:
I tried at first to reason with her excuses throughout last month until last week that it doesn't seem to make sense anymore....
When I talk say she go talk say she no ready give in until after 9 months
You won't even notice that she's pregnant yet
She's very active at her work place, goes to chuch regularly, markets, cook and other day to day activities

since she was a virgin the behaviour is norma. She’s not used to sex. But, speak to her mum to talk to her cos as a pregnant woman she will have complications when delivery as it’s her first child, she needs lub down there to make birthing easy if not, she should just know she will deliver by cs

emmyN:
✓ Thankfully, we're both against religion.

The coming from someone who, just comments ago, literally attempting winding his life around the book called the bible right before deploying ss a weapon against women.

Op your wife nor try at all! that's wickedness of the highest order.no affection,not even touching.ha! she doesn't love you at all bcs hormanal changes does not stop her from showing u affection

Beginning is very important in marriage . The way you respond to this act of selfishness is always the way to go . Better fight now or remain her boy . Act now .