₦airaland Forum

descarado:
@ topic. Its likely symptoms associated with preggy. Everybody and every preggy is diff.
I for an example do not have se'x till I put to bed. Hate it so much when guys come here to explain women and their hormones. Women related topics, they must comment. Must they put mouth? They have practically sent almost all females here away with their toxicity and ITK syndrome.

I am surprised some of them are saying with emphasis that it is not pregnancy. Haba! With my minion I was in out of the hospital. I vomited everything, even water until I became depressed. Imagine if he came here for advise. They will tell him to get a sidechick or second wife. 😂😂😂

Ozzyk:
We got married in ending of August
We didn't have anything to do together at all during our 2 year courtship
She's really adorable and a Godly babe to the core
On the second night of our wedding I confirmed she was a virgin
Sadly our honeymoon only lasted Barely 2 weeks before she missed her period
Here is the issue;
Since over a month and some few weeks now she won't let me touch her, in fact it's like my touches irritate her, no sex, no kiss, no smooching, no touching
It sometimes feels we're just house mates who shares same matrimonial bed together
I have tried to talk to her many times about my sexual wellness but she seems not interested at all
My marriage is less than 2 months and I am already over a month sex starved
Perhaps she sometimes complains of pregnancy cramps but this should not com at the detriment of my sexual well being.....
And besides she's goes to work everyday but the moments she gets home she won't let me touch not even slight touches not to talk of sex or romance....
I am already tired 😩

You should both see her gynaecologist, a professional, so she understands the implications of it. I know her hormones are responsible.

You have unknowingly married an iceberg.
And it would get colder as your marriage (if it lasts) goes along.
The technical word is FRIGID.
They don't like sex or male touch. They aren't necessarily gay or anything. They're just wired that way.
They can survive years without sex or intimacy.
In Western Countries, they're the ones that become Old Cat Lady or that spinster Librarian or that old primary school teacher that never got married.
After this pregnancy, forget touching her again
She just got this pregnancy as to make people comot eye for her matter
That's why sex before marriage helps to weed out such undesirables early on without the messy complications after marriage.

Ozzyk:
Hormonal changes also stops me from touching her?
This is a lady that goes about her daily activities like every other normal day
She doesn't even entertain little touches not to talk of romance or smooching
We're just like housemates who share the same bed together
No connection, no bond no chemistry

My guy, that woman used you to become a mother. Most probably doesn't have any deep love for you.
You are lucky she's showing this signs just after pregnancy. I will advise you not to tolerate shyt. The way she's treating you, give her back. Give her a total cold treatment and start thinking of another relationship sharperly. That is not your wife. She cares no bit about your sexual needs.

If I advise you to look for sidechick, they will crucify me. Your wife never talk what is her problem

Ozzyk:
We got married in ending of August
We didn't have anything to do together at all during our 2 year courtship
She's really adorable and a Godly babe to the core
On the second night of our wedding I confirmed she was a virgin
Sadly our honeymoon only lasted Barely 2 weeks before she missed her period
Here is the issue;
Since over a month and some few weeks now she won't let me touch her, in fact it's like my touches irritate her, no sex, no kiss, no smooching, no touching
It sometimes feels we're just house mates who shares same matrimonial bed together
I have tried to talk to her many times about my sexual wellness but she seems not interested at all
My marriage is less than 2 months and I am already over a month sex starved
Perhaps she sometimes complains of pregnancy cramps but this should not com at the detriment of my sexual well being.....
And besides she's goes to work everyday but the moments she gets home she won't let me touch not even slight touches not to talk of sex or romance....
I am already tired 😩

Didn't you talk about this before marriage?

For the pregnancy to stabilize doctors usually advise no sex until after 3 months along.

But if she's avoiding you, then your sex game is not good at all. You have probably traumatized the poor woman from the whole thing.

Thirdly pregnancy causes hormonal changes to women, what you see is what you get.

Fourthly, congratulations on marrying a virgin. This is one of the downsides of marrying one. If their first experience isn't good, they start avoiding you.

Just talk to her and try to find out what is going on, then masturbate to keep the urge under control like all the other married men

HenryWilliams:
You have unknowingly married an iceberg.
And it would get colder as your marriage (if it lasts) goes along.
The technical word is FRIGID.
They don't like sex or male touch. They aren't necessarily gay or anything. They're just wired that way.
They can survive years without sex or intimacy.
In Western Countries, they're the ones that become Old Cat Lady or that spinster Librarian or that old primary school teacher that never got married.
After this pregnancy, forget touching her again
She just got this pregnancy as to make people comot eye for her matter
That's why sex before marriage helps to weed out such undesirables early on without the messy complications after marriage.

I hope you know that old cat lady and spinster is no longer the insult it used to be 100 years ago.

Many western ladies are choosing that lifestyle to have a peaceful and drama free life

I am not 26.... Now calmly go back to the thread and read the thread again
I understand most Nigerians read to reply not read to understand
Thank you

vowiski:
You are a disgrace!

You married a virgin, waited for 2 years, you were having sex and impregnated her during your honeymoon, you want to keep having sex forgetting that her hormones has changed drastically, and she will start having mood swings.

It’s very clear you have not read any book on pregnancy , marriage and fatherhood.

There is a popular saying; if you want to hide something from a black man, put it inside a book and he will never find it.

Instead of you to read, you came to Nairaland to destroy your amazing marriage. I really pity for you.

You are 26, and you can’t do simple research, I am really embarrassed.

These Gen Z are so erratic, and it’s a huge same!

You waited 2 years, banging outside.. but can’t wait 3 months for your wife’s body to re-adjust because you have not read anything but to be tired of your marriage .

Please take a seat!

Diamond098454:
But you have been sleeping with her throughout your courtship a month of no sex won't kill you

They were celibate before marriage.

Ozzyk:
A legally married man should put his cap on hold for 9 months? And who told you you can start knacking you wife again immediately after 9 months? U must at least give her 8 weeks to heal after delivery
And it differs from women to women
Some could take more time

Bro it might surprise you to know so many married men are as sex starved as you ... the kind of holy holy courtship you had. with your woman makes a bit difficult to scan into what the issue might be with your wife cos pregnancy is not a solid excuse
In most cases, there are two reasons Men find themselves in situation as you

1. No be you she love gan gan but naa you ready
2. She was a virgin, so we cant tell if she doesnt like sex or not

But i do tell guyz, From my own experience i can say there is no woman that doesnt like sex, the man is not just enough turn On for her people might challenge this buh i am confidently saying it,
that same wife turning you down, might be with another man tomorrow n the man go dey run from her cos of over sex that gender you think you know them

My advice is, you need someone that can get inside her head, a therapist, mummy G.o or best friend that she can confide in that's how you have a real scan of what the issue is .. only then you know what's best to do

TWoods:
This doesn't make sense. If she were only choosing not to have sex, I would understand. She's basically shut down any form of affection completely. How is it crazy to expect that newlyweds would want to touch each other, hug, kiss, and hold hands? Bizarre.

I suffered same and this has shattered our marriage.

I am a Pediatric Nurse
None of this you wrote down there is true....
And No, sex in first trimester doesn't endangerer the pregnancy except on some rare cases...
My sex game wasn't wack lol
My point still stands;
It's not just about sex here
No bond, no connection, no touching no kiss, no smooching no deep talks
We were just leaving in the house as if we were house mates
And stop chatting me about hormonal shit...
Her symptoms is very very mild
No vomiting, no spits, no hyper pyrexia, no nausea her only symptoms seems to be sleeping a lot and eating less
Her hormones changes didn't stop her from doing her day today activities except being intimate with her hubby 😔 abi??

DrFunmisticGlow:
Didn't you talk about this before marriage?

For the pregnancy to stabilize doctors usually advise no sex until after 3 months along.

But if she's avoiding you, then your sex game is not good at all. You have probably traumatized the poor woman from the whole thing.

Thirdly pregnancy causes hormonal changes to women, what you see is what you get.

Fourthly, congratulations on marrying a virgin. This is one of the downsides of marrying one. If their first experience isn't good, they start avoiding you.

Just talk to her and try to find out what is going on, then masturbate to keep the urge under control like all the other married men

VOsimhen144:
na why I support polygamous marriage to an extent… as this op wife dey give am unnecessary attitude you go Jst switch enter the second wife kpekus.

OP, sit her down and talk to her, know what the issue is, if she no give u concrete reason and she no adjust, no jst dey stress urself, kpekus full everywhere, as low as 10k you go knack better kpekus.
U go run am codedly, no let ur wife know.
Life no hard abeg..

Naa for this tinubu economic you dey opine 2nd wife, do you know how much it cost to take care of one wife talk of more two .. you don marry ??

Sex is the not the only problem with humans, you can marry a 2nd wife that wil be giving you sex But she is showing you another kind of shege disrupting your peace of mind you go run marry 3rd wife abi ,,, thats solution abi

Not every man are like us community preek, some just want to be with there woman that Op had 2yrs courtship of no sex depict he is not the infidelity type

brain54:
I am not talking about all these your tactics...


And any other thing you posted. But did you consider that it may not be a case of manipulation but just a simple case of she being frigid or having low sexual drive genuinely?

Some people simply have low sex drives and it might not be about manipulation!

Do you know that a married woman with understanding and suffering from low sex drive will act differently? The way she is acting as explained by the OP is not only about low sex drive. Is it low sex drive that makes her not understand that her husband too has sexual needs? Is it low sex drive that is preventing her from trying to satisfy the desires of her husband? With those questions, you will know that even though she may have low sex drive, there is something else she wrong in her actions. A woman who really cares though suffering low sex drive should be able to sacrifice once in a while, should also be able to communicate how she is feeling and plead her husband give her some time... but u see this lady, she has more issues than just low sex drive.

Mariangeles:
Na so una dey take go outside go pack evil spirit wey full outside, carry enter una home.
When things begin fall apart, una no go open mouth talk wetin una do.
God dey watch all of una!

So you are just gonna play the victim here after using your own hands to push the innocence man out

will women ever take responsibilities ... you starve a man n expect him not to anything .. should that be a " trust"

brain54:
I am not talking about all these your tactics...


And any other thing you posted. But did you consider that it may not be a case of manipulation but just a simple case of she being frigid or having low sexual drive genuinely?

Some people simply have low sex drives and it might not be about manipulation!

Someone told you the pure truth and you're here citing excuses on behalf of your wife. Why create a thread in the first place when you have excuses drawn up in her favour already? Few weeks old pregnancy, August wedding and you guys can't have sex. Infact, scratch the sex. No physical contact, no touching, no kissing, no hugs? Man! You either man up and act now or forever stay a slave to her manipulation. Nothing irks me better than these hypocritical religious fanatics.

Ozzyk:
Get creative how

Buy G-strings and wear 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Ozzyk:
I am a Pediatric Nurse
None of this you wrote down there is true....
And No, sex in first trimester doesn't endangerer the pregnancy except on some rare cases...
My sex game wasn't wack lol
My point still stands;
It's not just about sex here
No bond, no connection, no touching no kiss, no smooching no deep talks
We were just leaving in the house as if we were house mates
And stop chatting me about hormonal shit...
Her symptoms is very very mild
No vomiting, no spits, no hyper pyrexia, no nausea her only symptoms seems to be sleeping a lot and eating less
Her hormones changes didn't stop her from doing her day today activities except being intimate with her hubby 😔 abi??

Okay. So what do you want to do now?
I don't think a normal woman would start being this evil 2mths into marriage, but your wife might be an exception.

Since you are professionally sure she is being mischievous, you might consider a 2nd wife. There is one lady here that complained of her husband not having vigorous sex with her. You can check her out. I pray you find a solution.

God abeg x1million times.

The truth is she not not be pregnant but as a virgin or even non virgin, men’s sperm destroys women’s hormone. Give her time to adjust and make sure your sperm is healthy enough not to give her those cramps. Your sperm are the reason why she’s having severe hormonal problems. The only way to fix it is through multivitamin and if she’s pregnant, research multivitamin for yourself too to help her body relax. Men you don’t know how much you people destroy women’s bodies. That’s why you’ll see a slim girl the moment she takes in she blows us. It’s the hormones her body is fighting and trying to adjust. Buy her supplements. Her body might be lacking on so many nutrients as she’s a virgin if you don’t want to lose your baby too. Two of my friends that married a virgin lost thier first pregnancy because of this hormonal issue

NiRfreak:
Most men wey be newly married no kon geh sense again for this country....like clueless.
..
Which planet does 2 weeks pregnancy means no more touching, kissing and sex for a couple.
.
Even 7 months pregnant woman with big Belle still dey knack Deir husband. 2 weeks honeymoon and waiting 9months after delivery seems like something sensible to you?

Ignorance!

This is a very selfish comment.

Op, majority of women when pregnant hates to be touched and sorry, this is not something they can control it is their body speaking and any touch irritates the body and again, get ready to wait even longer after birth. It is just the body reacting to pregnancy.


And as your marriage is still young, you really do not want to cheat on your wife now or ever, as you might cheat yourself on the blessings that awaits you.

NiRfreak:
Oga go and sit down with ur Western bullshit
... You don't know Nigerian women. Do like dodoyo they will turn you to an ozuor. Nonsense and frigidity.

It's not a Nigerian woman thing. It's a toxic woman thing and your advice is to match her toxicity with his own toxicity.

Even Western couples have their own share of toxic. Don't confuse having a healthy marriage with race.

In this case, it's not right to assume manipulation upfront. She's inexperienced and naive.

It's obvious that there's a disconnect. Ozzyk doesn't understand her and she doesn't understand him.

Honestly this one no clear me oo, I can sense manipulation here shaa, but let's keep watching

kiddaz:
There was never a time they had regular sex, going by the op

which time, naa wedding night conjugation you dey consider sex ..... i am not surprise the pregancy came so fast .. OP don full reach throat if you press pimples on him naa while fluid go gush out 🤣 baba suffer enter marriage still dey suffer i feel for him

Ozzyk:
I am a Pediatric Nurse
None of this you wrote down there is true....
And No, sex in first trimester doesn't endangerer the pregnancy except on some rare cases...
My sex game wasn't wack lol
My point still stands;
It's not just about sex here
No bond, no connection, no touching no kiss, no smooching no deep talks
We were just leaving in the house as if we were house mates
And stop chatting me about hormonal shit...
Her symptoms is very very mild
No vomiting, no spits, no hyper pyrexia, no nausea her only symptoms seems to be sleeping a lot and eating less
Her hormones changes didn't stop her from doing her day today activities except being intimate with her hubby 😔 abi??

I am not a nurse but from this comment, I’d advise you go back to nursing school or self learn, do some research etc ! You as a nurse should understand how pregnancy works in women better, but no here you are acting unprofessional.


Just so you know, this is mostly common among pregnant women and I can’t believe you have no idea of this lol Whoever hired you might need to keep a close eyes on you.

Ozzyk was obviously cheating during their courtship. His wife is naive. There's a disconnect.

Xilsbridalhouse:
Ignorance!

This is a very selfish comment.

Op, majority of women when pregnant hates to be touched and sorry, this is not something they can control it is their body speaking and any touch irritates the body and again, get ready to wait even longer after birth. It is just the body reacting to pregnancy.


And as your marriage is still young, you really do not want to cheat on your wife now or ever, as you might cheat yourself on the blessings that awaits you.

Ozzyk:
I tried at first to reason with her excuses throughout last month until last week that it doesn't seem to make sense anymore....
When I talk say she go talk say she no ready give in until after 9 months
You won't even notice that she's pregnant yet
She's very active at her work place, goes to chuch regularly, markets, cook and other day to day activities

It makes no sense to me either. Moreover, refusing to have sex during pregnancy, for a virgin will lead to birth complications that may require operation, costing you more money.

If you can cope with that, continue being understanding.

I don't believe it's because she was a virgin that made her the way she's right now.

Also don't believe it's because she took him almost immediately.

I have experience with both scenario and this didn't stop sex even down to few weeks before delivery.

lovemaths:
You guys should book a session with a qualified marriage counsellor

mama deola would be great

Comrades has gave this man better advice which I also learnt from.
Please Note: Where this western world is taking us to? Invert I have not seeing anyone mention family. We have to be careful in africa with foreign mentality we are practicing here. No need to consult Chancellor or any religions you might be practicing. Talk to her parents, if she doesn't, report her to one elderly person in her family before taking her matter to your family. All this draging will stop. You have to let her know the important of marriage as well because if you dont let her know now that is what she would be using against you to deal with you in future. Be smart enough and think ahead both of you are playing game. Youre head of the family and you have to WIN the battle. I wish you all the best in your marriage.