₦airaland Forum

Towma:
This propaganda of trying to force women to forgive cheating husbands is nothing but pure evi.

Nobody forces or can force any woman to marry or stay in a marriage with this propaganda.

There's propaganda and there is reality. Anyone that's not stupid should be able to see reality.

This is one of them when you look around you. Divorced women with multiple children find it hard to date single men.

You can be emotional as you want to, but that doesn't change the reality.

It's same way women were using emotions to say men have same biological clock like women in the other thread. Reality in our lifes and surrounding says otherwise.

To be clear, the woman in this story was dating other men after divorcing her husband, but she was dating married men, Alhajis with multiple wives.

Do you think that's her choice of men The answer is obviously a NO. But that's what she got in the dating market being a divorcee with multiple kids.

That's the reality in life. It's not new and it will not end with her.

Helpout12345:
Nobody forces or can force any woman to marry or stay in a marriage with this propaganda.

There's propaganda and there is reality. Anyone that's not stupid should be able to see reality.

This is one of them when you look around you. Divorced women with multiple children find it hard to date single men.

You can be emotional as you want to, but that doesn't change the reality.

It's same way women were using emotions to say men have same biological clock like women in the other thread. Reality in our lifes and surrounding says otherwise.

@bold, good. So we should discourage infidelity in husbands instead of threatening wives to stay with unfaithful husbands because it will be hard for them to date single men if they divorce.

pocohantas:
There is also Annie Idibia who endured for years. I am not even sure Tuface had to beg her. Only to be kicked out at 40yrs. Una still blame Annie Idibia. So make una try rest with these stories aimed at gaslighting women to see infidelity as normal. If she was cool with him, she should have stuck to him. Some women have done it and heaven didn't fall.

Tuface left Annie because she feuded with his family and they won, eventually

You really don't wanna win such battles as the woman, imo, because anyone who would forsake his family could also do the same to you

Back to the cousin, her ex-hubby would still have gotten a woman pregnant even if she'd stayed. His cheating wasn't an isolated incident it just happened to be the one she caught

In my opinion (again) and I'm 99% sure I'm right this time, all men cheat. It's just that some are smart and careful about it and they rarely get caught. The tiny majority of men who don't cheat are the biological anomalies who are testosterone-deficient

Jamie248:
Tuface left Annie because she feuded with his family and they won, eventually

You really don't wanna win such battles as the woman, imo, because anyone who would forsake his family could also do the same to you

All the years she was enduring and being used as example for the rest of us to emulate. I never saw anyone say she was fighting his family. Even Chioma Davido, when she was actively enduring, she was a role model. When they broke up, it became story of how she cheated with Peruzzi. They got back and that narrative died a natural death.

What was Yul's reason? Was May also fighting his family? What of Paul Okoye?

When a man is done with his wife, all her years of endurance wouldn't count. He will dump her and defense counsels like you will type epistles mansplaining. She stays to endure _virtuous. She leaves ___evil. She stays to endure __Nigerian women can stay with anything for money. She leaves ___evil.

He leaves ___ peace of mind.

Clap for yourself. You feel say na 15yo you dey talk with.

I pity w0men wh0 lack direction. If a woman was married for years, has children and left her marriage for good reasons, why then should she bother about remarrying? Maj0rity 0f men have n0thing good to offer, they are like a cur$e. I always tell myself that if for any reason I become divorced, that I will never remarry again.

Financial Independence is important, if a woman is able to foot her bills she can always live a peaceful life with her kids only. I'd rather be a single mother living with my children,, than live with a cheating hu$band, infact his mere $ight w0uld irritate me.

Jamie248:
Tuface left Annie because she feuded with his family and they won, eventually

You really don't wanna win such battles as the woman, imo, because anyone who would forsake his family could also do the same to you

Back to the cousin, her ex-hubby would still have gotten a woman pregnant even if she'd stayed. His cheating wasn't an isolated incident it just happened to be the one she caught

In my opinion (again) and I'm 99% sure I'm right this time, all men cheat. It's just that some are smart and careful about it and they rarely get caught. The tiny majority of men who don't cheat are the biological anomalies who are testosterone-deficient

It's amazing how someone will use his dopemu self and clique to represent all men. More amazing is expressing it with a palsy confidence.

Lol be like you hurt or a divorcee trying to encourage your type

Kobojunkie:
If your friend had simply stopped at starting afresh, instead of jumping headlong into meaningless relationships, she probably would have been better off.

Yes, she did the right thing by abandoning her abuser — the man who cheated on her. No woman or man should remain in an abusive relationship, no matter how much their abuser begs. Her mistake was in roping herself with other men afterwards without first ensuring she had properly healed from the previous abuse, and also her own lack of self-awareness and dearth of self-love.

2. Wrong, life more than gave your friend numerous chances at a second chance. She refused to take advantage of them to the fullest. Life has nothing to do with what became of your friend, as your narrative clearly shows. There are so many of our mothers and grandmothers who were literally abandoned in marriage, who went on to live better and more fulfilling lives outside of marriage out there as examples to any woman who wishes to use her second chance outside of marriage to her benefit.

Unfortunately, this story is typical of a certain kind of woman... the kind who doesn't know or even realize how valuable she is as a human being; this kind typically believes her worth is nothing until a man accepts her. It is a shame that professional psychotherapy is still not fully embraced by many in Nigeria.

---

Tell your friend it is not too late for her to pick herself and start over again loving herself first. That is the only way to heal and get her self in esteem back where it ought to be -- up high. No human is born needing others for validation and self worth. 🥱🥱

South4sure1:
➜Lol be like you hurt or a divorcee trying to encourage your type

Um... is this something you need me to be all so you can feel better about yourself? 🥱🥱🥱

I'm trying hard to understand the story. A man cheats, the woman leaves, but some dimwits heap all the blame on her, whilst applauding the husband. So, because it is difficult for a single woman to find a partner, she is supposed to endure whatever rubbish she gets from a man? Before antiretroviral drugs became popular, I knew up to 5 women who died from AIDS after their spouses infected them. I am sure if they had left after finding out that their horsebands cheated, they would have still been blamed by the ignoramuses we have littered on this forum.

Honestly, the comments would have been okay if they were coming from archaic men that lived in the last century. I find it disturbing that it is contemporary men in their 20s..30s..and 40s that are making such senseless comments and encouraging what is clearly not right. Is this an African thing or men generally are taking chauvinism to a whole different level? Seriously, things are getting worse that sometimes I wonder what the future has for the next generation of women.

pocohantas:
There is also Annie Idibia who endured for years. I am not even sure Tuface had to beg her. Only to be kicked out at 40yrs. Una still blame Annie Idibia. So make una try rest with these stories aimed at gaslighting women to see infidelity as normal. If she was cool with him, she should have stuck to him. Some women have done it and heaven didn't fall.

Annie was just unlucky. Tuface was failing at everything in life and many a times if a man doesn’t make progress in life after many years of marriage he might start thinking bizzaredly that they are jinxed with bad luck marrying that woman, people like Obi cubana and co might Have had turbulent marriages before now but if you ask them today they will say their wife is the best

aariwa:
Annie was just unlucky. Tuface was failing at everything in life and many a times if a man doesn’t make progress in life after many years of marriage he might start thinking bizzaredly that they are jinxed with bad luck marrying that woman, people like Obi cubana and co might Have had turbulent marriages before now but if you ask them today they will say their wife is the best

You are right that Annie was unlucky, but Tuface wasn't failing to the best of our general knowledge. He is still one of the most celebrated musicians in Nigeria and Africa as a whole. We never expected him to sing until 80yrs __he is not a Fuji artiste.

If you ask me, given how they started, trust and true peace has been eroded. It was only normal Annie turns into a vicious dog like she did. No woman can be truly happy with a community husband. Either she lacks the money or she lacks the will to leave. Annie lacked the will. We need to stop lying to ourselves that women are okay with such dynamics because there is money. Even tiny Regina told Chinedu she would have divorced him since. The heart of a woman is very deep and unlike men that act it out, women know the odds are not in our favour. So we play the long game or evil game.

e no easy for us way be medical practioners



every small thing wife go suspect you especially if you fine

Lies that never happened

Too many sugar has shown that this story is false.

Towma:
I work in Healthcare and have seen and heard cases of men transmitting incurable diseases to their wives because of their sleeping around. This propaganda of trying to force women to forgive cheating husbands is nothing but pure evil.

If as a man you cannot masturbate your excess sex urges instead of cheating on your wife, then make sure you inform whoever you want to marry that you believe it's your right to cheat so she can know what kind of selfish bastard you are before marriage.

I am a medical doctor and it's very painful seeing women being managed for all sorts of sexually transmitted infections esp HIV .
This is why I insist on "No condoms ,no sex" with my husband after I completed child bearing

There is no reason to have unprotected sex with a man, if not for the purpose of procreation.

For me, if he refuses to use condoms, no sex.
Las las, na him go cry cos he needs the sex more than I do.

Dear ladies please don't mind the op, don't tolerate cheating from your boyfriend and husband.


If any man cheats on you, please divorce him asap cos he doesn't deserve an angle like you, mbok



Men must get sense by fire by force

spiceadole:
I am a medical doctor and it's very painful seeing women being managed for all sorts of sexually transmitted infections esp HIV .
This is why I insist on "No condoms ,no sex" with my husband after I completed child bearing

There is no reason to have unprotected sex with a man, if not for the purpose of procreation.

For me, if he refuses to use condoms, no sex.
Las las, na him go cry cos he needs the sex more than I do.

I support this post with 30 Lieutenant Yerima the Wike antidote.


No condom, no sex after couple are done with childbearing, you get too much sense Doc

LilMissFavvy:
I pity w0men wh0 lack direction. If a woman was married for years, has children and left her marriage for good reasons, why then should she bother about remarrying? Maj0rity 0f men have n0thing good to offer, they are like a cur$e. I always tell myself that if for any reason I become divorced, that I will never remarry again.

Financial Independence is important, if a woman is able to foot her bills she can always live a peaceful life with her kids only. I'd rather be a single mother living with my children,, than live with a cheating hu$band, infact his mere $ight w0uld irritate me.

The only thing about marriage is having kids who knows their father and roots.

Women who divorce and remarry esp when they had children already are nothing but idio..ts

LilMissFavvy:
I pity w0men wh0 lack direction. If a woman was married for years, has children and left her marriage for good reasons, why then should she bother about remarrying? Maj0rity 0f men have n0thing good to offer, they are like a cur$e. I always tell myself that if for any reason I become divorced, that I will never remarry again.

Financial Independence is important, if a woman is able to foot her bills she can always live a peaceful life with her kids only. I'd rather be a single mother living with my children,, than live with a cheating hu$band, infact his mere $ight w0uld irritate me.

Ride on MissFavvy, I stand with you on this. On your mandate we shall stand.


Single ladies reading this should just forget about marriage cos I don't even see any need for ladies to marry cos they are only doing men favor.



Men must get sense by fire by force

ariesbull:
My cousin ended her five-year marriage the day she found out her husband cheated. We all begged her to think twice, to calm down before walking away. But she was done. She packed her things, took her two kids, and left.

For a year, the man went from one relative to another, begging for forgiveness. He apologised, promised to change, did everything a repentant man would do. But she stood firm. “I deserve better,” she said.

She got her own place, started afresh, and later met a married man who treated her well. For a while it looked like she had found peace until his wife showed up one morning and scattered everything. The man disappeared, and she was left humiliated.

Not long after, another man came along. He stayed just two months before running off when money became an issue. No message, no explanation.

Then came an Alhaji who promised marriage but only if she sent her sons back to their father. He said he could not raise another man’s children. She ended it right there.

Three years later, she woke up one morning and asked herself, what if I go back? The man still loved her, the kids missed him, and maybe time had softened her heart.

So she went to his house early that morning, ready to reconcile. But a pregnant woman opened the door. Her ex-husband had moved on.

It has been over ten years now. The woman who once turned heads no longer does. The suitors stopped coming. Her kids are back with their father, cared for by their stepmother who now has two of her own.

Life does not always give you a second chance. Sometimes pride takes what pain never could.

Maliq

It Is quite obvious you made this up, a very poor attempt at preaching patriarchy!

Left her cheating husband to go date a married man. The street will always claim their pound of flesh

Jamie248:
Tuface left Annie because she feuded with his family and they won, eventually

You really don't wanna win such battles as the woman, imo, because anyone who would forsake his family could also do the same to you

Back to the cousin, her ex-hubby would still have gotten a woman pregnant even if she'd stayed. His cheating wasn't an isolated incident it just happened to be the one she caught

In my opinion (again) and I'm 99% sure I'm right this time, all men cheat. It's just that some are smart and careful about it and they rarely get caught. The tiny majority of men who don't cheat are the biological anomalies who are testosterone-deficient

Erase this notion that all men cheat. Are biological anomalies men that never get it up when action calls or never get tired of sleeping with a single woman almost daily

She doesnt want her husband cheating on her but she dated a married man. She no wise thats why

Kobojunkie:
If your friend had simply stopped at starting afresh, instead of jumping headlong into meaningless relationships, she probably would have been better off.

Yes, she did the right thing by abandoning her abuser — the man who cheated on her. No woman or man should remain in an abusive relationship, no matter how much their abuser begs. Her mistake was in roping herself with other men afterwards without first ensuring she had properly healed from the previous abuse, and also her own lack of self-awareness and dearth of self-love.

2. Wrong, life more than gave your friend numerous chances at a second chance. She refused to take advantage of them to the fullest. Life has nothing to do with what became of your friend, as your narrative clearly shows. There are so many of our mothers and grandmothers who were literally abandoned in marriage, who went on to live better and more fulfilling lives outside of marriage out there as examples to any woman who wishes to use her second chance outside of marriage to her benefit.

Unfortunately, this story is typical of a certain kind of woman... the kind who doesn't know or even realize how valuable she is as a human being; this kind typically believes her worth is nothing until a man accepts her. It is a shame that professional psychotherapy is still not fully embraced by many in Nigeria.

---

Tell your friend it is not too late for her to pick herself and start over again loving herself first. That is the only way to heal and get her self in esteem back where it ought to be -- up high. No human is born needing others for validation and self worth. 🥱🥱

you carried ai lamba post here,this write up is so distant from reality.😮‍💨

tommy589:
Erase this notion that all men cheat. Are biological anomalies men that never get it up when action calls or never get tired of sleeping with a single woman almost daily

Those are sick men in need of medical intervention

And if you don't get tired of sleeping with a single woman day-in day-out, you're suffering from hormonal imbalance

Morale of the story, men are shit but it's a man's world. Smh

Mckandre:
you carried ai lamba post here,this write up is so distant from reality.😮‍💨

Sure the post may be false but the reality is many of us hear or read these sort of tales told as some cautionary tale to keep women holding on in toxic/terrible relationship. That is the sole reason why I felt to dissect the foolishness behind the tale and the claims made by some women out there who also tell these tales to other women or even their children.

How stupid women think leaving their marriage to become side chicks of other married men is sickening.

Both men and women should be responsible. My advice to women out there is please when you are in relationship observe, and don't overlook the red signs. A broken relationship is better than a broken marriage. And don't forget to pray if you don't have a mother praying for you.